Himiko slowly regained consciousness, eyes fuzzy and head spinning. She had a severe, splitting headache. It felt as though someone had dropped a tire iron repeatedly on her skull. She sat slowly up, trying not to become dizzy or fall over. "Did anyone get the number of Mr. No Brake's truck?" she muttered to herself, rubbing her scalp.
When her head and vision finally managed to clear, she pressed her thin fingers up against the translucent glass of her oddly shaped prison. The world beyond was amazing. Endless rows of toys stretched as far as her lightly colored eyes could see. Bears, dolls, games, video systems, anything she'd ever have wanted as a small child was laid out before her eyes. Seeing as how she was still just a teen, it almost brought a feeling of wishfulness up to her heart.
She shook the feeling away and studied her prison. She seemed to be hanging in mid-air. The clear glass beneath her feet allowed her to see people in elf costumes walking below her. Many were pushing laundry baskets alternately full of toys and what seemed to be computer parts. "Hey!" She called, pounding on the glass. "Oy! What's going on here?" They didn't even so much as glance up at her. "Can you hear me?" she screamed, again with no response. Giving up, she sagged against the red-glass wall of her strange prison. "They must not be able to hear me from there."
"They can hear your fine, Lady Poison. They just choose not to answer," a smooth male voice answered, tone blended with just a hint of cruelty.
Himiko spun around in her cell. "J-Jackal!"
He scoffed, hat pulled down over his eyes. He was leaning up against the wall of a round, green glass cell. It was only when Himiko looked over at her fellow transporter that she realized the nature of her own cell. She was trapped inside a giant Christmas tree ornament! The cell door had even been tailored to look like the gold top of an old-fashioned ornament. "What happened? The last thing I remember, we were in the truck."
"Why would you ask me? I awakened less than a few minutes before you. I was assuming that you would be able to tell me, seeing as how poison gas is your area of expertise."
"I don't think it was poisonous gas that knocked us out. I would have been able to detect it. Even if I hadn't, my breathing techniques would have prevented me from taking in enough to knock me out." She frowned and bit her lip in deep thought. "It wouldn't have been in the cookies or eggnog they served at the center, because you weren't there to eat those…"
"So what did happen, then?" he asked, calm but irritated. He crossed his arms over his broad chest, shifting with annoyance at the indignity of the situation.
"How should I know?" Himiko snapped back, waving her arms angrily. "You were there, why don't you figure it out and tell me?!"
"Come on now, children!" a jolly voice laughed, drawing the attention of both prisoners. "You'd better watch out, you'd better not pout. I'm telling you why. SANTA CLAUS is coming to town!" From the shadows of a black catwalk, an old man in a red, fuzzy, American-style Santa costume emerged. If it hadn't been for the crazed look in his eyes and the hard, angular edges of his face he might have made a perfect commercial greeting card image. "Now, what have we here?" he asked, studying the two. "Not very festive outfits, I'm afraid. Where are your red and greens? You're hardly dressed warm enough for Christmas weather. Didn't your mothers warn you that you'd catch your deaths of cold?"
"They're toy corporation spies, sir!" a man in a full-body plush reindeer costume answered, saluting as best he could with giant fake antlers on his head.
"Spies? Well, that will land you two on the naughty list," the Santa mused, rubbing an obviously fake beard.
"We're not spies!" Himiko angrily disagreed, striking the glass with her fist. "You're stealing the toys intended for poor children!"
The Santa shook his head. "What fire, what spunk this child has. Unfortunately, like most children, she does not understand the world of adults. Oh, my dear, do you know why some children must go without toys in the first place?"
Before Himiko could answer, the Santa slammed a mitten-fist down on the catwalk railing. "Corporate greed! In the new world I am creating, there will be no child without toys! No greed!"
"This guy is fruiter than one of your gift baskets, Jackal," Himiko muttered just loud enough for him to hear. Or, so she thought. The Santa apparently had excellent hearing as he stopped ranting and glared at Himiko.
"Such a lively girl!" he declared as his glare melted into a smile. "She speaks with an innocent lack of understanding of my true goals. She'll make an excellent addition to my empire. Elves!" he shouted, causing several attendants in elf costumes to snap to attention. "Take these spies to the Holly-Jollyfication machine!"
- -
Meanwhile, Ban and Ginji were buried beneath a pile of plush dolls. It wasn't the most comfortable position to be in, but it was surprisingly warm. "This is brilliant, Ban-chan!" Ginji grinned. He was dressed in a giant plush monkey mascot costume, holding a stuffed banana in one hand. "We'll make them think we're toys so they'll take us to where they're holding Himiko-chan."
"Why did I get this costume?" Ban asked angrily. He was wearing a giant, purple plush snake costume. A stuffed red tongue kept falling down in front his face, which was made further annoying by the fact that it took effort to wiggle his hands free and push it away.
"These were the only two costumes Elf-chan had left, and that one didn't fit me." Ginji answered.
Ban grunted, then silenced Ginji. "No talking. We have to make sure they don't find out that we're not toys." As if on cue, the truck suddenly let out a great sigh of air breaks being applied. Toys slid forward with the force of inertia.
"Why are we stopping?" Ginji whispered.
"I hear a train crossing alarm. Now sssh!" Ban hissed, appropriately enough considering the disguise he was wearing.
Without warning, the door to the cab of the truck was thrown open. The driver had just begun to shout when there was a burst of very loud Christmas carol music. The driver let out a cry like a mangled groan and collapsed weakly on the seat, drooling.
As two masked men in elf costumes climbed into the front seats, Ban realized they had been using sonic weapons to stun and render unconscious their prey. They idea was amazingly ingenious. No one would suspect such a thing, let alone a weapon that played Christmas songs when fired. He remained as still as he could, hoping Ginji would do the same, as the elves drove the truck away into the night. Hold on, Himiko. I'm coming to save you, Ban's overly manly ego thought.
. 0 .
Back at the toy warehouse, mechanical hooks had picked up the ornament prisons by their lids and carried them away. Himiko looked up at the transport mechanism, noticing then that her poison belt had been hung around the neck of the giant ornament. Himiko glanced over at Akabane. "As fun as being Holly Jollified sounds, I'm afraid we're going to have to take a sold-out-toy rain check." She pointed to the glass of the prisons. "Dr. Jackal, if you would?"
He smiled at her, eyes closed in upside-down happy V's. "I'd just been waiting for you to ask, Lady Poison."
Glass was no match for Akabane's blades. The second Himiko was freed she grabbed her belt and attacked the row of elves with her slow-motion potion. She jumped to the catwalk of the building, crouched there like a small tiger. "Don't kill them!" she shouted to Akabane, who landed a few feet away from her in a flourish of black coat. "Some of them are the missing toy employees! He's probably brainwashed them!"
Akabane pouted slightly. Himiko has to go and ruin his idea of Christmas cheer, didn't she? He caught a movement out of the corner of his eye and dodged, pushing Himiko out of the way in the process.
Himiko could only stare as six candy canes, sharpened to arrow-like points, sailed past herself and Akabane and imbedded themselves in the solid metal walls. "Lethal candy canes?" she cried out in surprise, poisons at the ready.
"We should use lethal force to fight lethal force," Akabane argued, deflecting an incoming candy cane.
"No! We have to save the employees. I- look out!"
The two scattered as pine tree needles, similarly sharpened, pepper sprayed the wall where they'd been standing. As a needle whizzed past Himiko's face, she noticed a strange scent. Not just the scent of pine, but another smell very familiar to her. It smelled like… poison! "Jackal! The pine needles are poisoned! Don't let them hit you!"
Akabane threw up a defensive scalpel shield, protecting himself from the needles. A few managed to go around his shield, but fortunately failed to hit his skin. "Perhaps we should fall back and regroup, Lady Poison?"
"For once, I concur," she answered, noticing a needle that had managed to stick into Akabane's pants. The sheer numbers of projectiles made it impossible for even someone with his speed to dodge them all, and the elves were readying a second volley. "Even bad shots occasionally get lucky!" She turned and fled down a hall, Akabane behind her.
"Pursue them, sir?" one of the reindeer asked.
"She's such a naughty, naughty little girl," The Santa sighed, staring fondly at where Akabane and Himiko had vanished. "Capture her, unharmed. Do as you will with the man. The girl, however…" he sighed romantically, "Will make a lovely Mrs. Claus!"