Artemis Fowl : The Secret of the Myth
In Which She Appears
St Bartleby's School For Young Gentlemen
He had had enough ,dealing with an incurable pack of madmen , every day .Having to be patient when people absolutely refused to talk and drenched his grandfather's 'authentic Victorian' chair in tears and littering his so ,so lovely carpet in used tissues or even worse ,trying to tell him that totally authentic ,very genuine Victorian chair was ,would one believe it ,fake !
No ,no .Too much ,much too much even for the brilliant psychologist ,Dr Po ,Phd ,he was
leaving ,never mind how much St Bartleby's House of Hoodlums needed him .He ,was off .
Sabrina Wilkinson fitted the bill of your everyday ,fresh-out –school-graduate to a T. She was in her early twenties ,(still) extremely gung-ho and bright-eyed and bushy-tailed about her first job .Apart from that ,she was pale with freckles on her nose ,had an enormous collection of over fifty pairs of coloured contact lenses (her favourite being the purple) ,had hair that changed colour every month or so ,thanks to Loreal hair dye (she was currently using blonde) ,and most peculiarly ,her new posting was as a psychologist at St Bartleby's .
The first counselling session of the year for Artemis Fowl
'Artemis! Look at me, please. I thought you had already signed our 'Friendship Contract here,' Sabrina paused and fumbled with the five-inch high binder ,finally pulling out a piece of paper which said :Friendship Contract .It had been photocopied out of the latest child psychology book written by Dr F. Roy Dean Schlippe so as far as Sabrina could see ,there was absolutely no reason why it did not work on Artemis ,not to mention what else she had tried so far .She had attempted to get 'pal-ly' with him ,telling him to call her 'Breenie' ,then trying to make him laugh by telling antique knock-knock jokes(she did get him to laugh in the end --- by spilling coffee all over herself ) ,after that she embarked on her life story for a full four hours until she realized that Artemis had not said a word .
Artemis was bored ,Sabrina ,the inane quack ,was the one who needed a psychological assessment ,not him ,and as for that 'Friendship Contract' ,he could have told her himself that it would not work ,as he was Dr F. Roy Dean Schlippe and had wrote that rag as a big joke on the world(and of course ,to earn even more money) .He looked at the paper that Sabrina had thrust at him when the bell rang ,the counselling session was done for the day .