The Crossover Saga
By Stoney (stoney107@yahoo.com)
Chapter 3
KO'ed
Field of Dreams, ?:?? pm.
Mario opened his eyes to find himself on a small hill in a grassy prairie. He got to his feet, wondering where he was and how he'd gotten here. Hadn't he just fallen asleep in his hotel room? So how had he gone from there to completely lost in an unfamiliar setting? He became confused.
He looked up, and only grew more confused as he saw what was above him. The sky was black and dotted with stars, indicating that it was nighttime in this place, wherever he was. But the landscape around him was lit up as if it were daytime, despite there being no visible source of light. He took off his cap and scratched his head in puzzlement. Then he realized something.
He looked at himself to find that he was no longer in his pajamas, but back in his work clothes. How'd he get dressed without knowing it? He placed his cap back onto his head, shooting bewildered glances at his surroundings. None of this was making any sense.
Not knowing what else to do, he picked a random direction and began walking. He had to admit, the scene around him was kind of pretty. Trees could be seen marking the edge of a forest in the distance, but between here and there only a few towering oaks broke up the monotony of the gently swaying grass. He rested beneath one of these trees, leaning against it's smooth trunk and shivering slightly in its shade. A gentle wind came along and fanned his face. He sat down with a sigh, and smiled. If this place wasn't so weird, he could almost get used to it.
The wind picked up suddenly, turning into a violent gale that swept Mario's cap clean off his head with no warning at all. Mario opened his eyes as he felt the unfamiliar coldness on his scalp, and felt around up there to find his precious cap missing. He gasped in horror, then looked around himself frantically and spied the cap being blown away toward the forest. He immediately leaped to his feet and ran after the slowly diminishing hat as fast as he could go, praying that he wouldn't lose his most prized possession to the powerful forces of nature.
The cap grew farther away and Mario upped his pace, his breath beginning to come in shorter and shorter breaths until he was almost gasping for air. He willed himself to go faster anyway, not noticing that the cap had almost been blown to the forest by now.
The precious garment entered the grove of trees and snagged itself upon a limb. The wind tugged against it, almost seeming angry at the resistance. But the branch held firm, and Mario ran faster, hoping to grab the cap before the wind tore it loose.
He entered the forest, but failed to notice the bizarre shape of the trees, or the odd coloring of their leaves; his focus was completely on his bright red cap waving in the wind. He was almost to it! Just a couple more feet...
The branch suddenly gave a sharp snapping sound, and with a cry Mario lunged.
With a sickening crack, the branch broke, freeing the cap from its anchor. Mario's hand stretched for it but caught only air, as the wind yanked it just out of his reach. Mario suddenly found himself falling from his lunge to land face down in the mud, still cap-less and beginning to despair.
With a squelch he came away from the muddy ground and pulled himself to his feet. Wiping the slimy liquid from his eyes, he saw the cap be twirled through the air by random gusts of wind before uncerimoniously landing in a bush. Hope surged through him anew. He quickly raced toward the bush to retrieve the hat.
He stopped short and skidded to a halt as the bush gave a loud rustle and shook itself. He eyed the plant warily. Was there intelligent plantlife in this place? Maybe he shouldn't violate the bush's personal space. After all, he hailed from a kingdom of walking, talking fungi. Walking, talking shrubbery just seemed like the next evolutional step.
In the next second he found out that the source of the shaking wasn't the bush itself but something inside the bush, as something large, round and pink jumped out of it at him. He gave a startled yell and backpedaled frantically, only to trip over the forgotten broken branch and land on his rear in the mud. He quickly stood back up to face off with his attacker, noticing with dismay his dirty appearance.
The round pink thing stopped its advancing and began snickering, then chuckling. Then it pointed at Mario and laughed out loud at his predictament. The plumber was covered from head to foot in ugly brown mud, bits of it falling off him to land on the ground with a plop! as the rest of it oozed into his shoes and gloves. With what dignity he had left Mario attempted to wipe the mud off himself. Unfortunately, it was hopeless. He finally gave up and turned to get a good look at his would-be attacker.
The thing was short, around half Mario's height, completely round, and colored a bright luminescent pink. It had two red triangles sticking out from it's base, which Mario assumed were its feet. Two pink cones stuck out to either side of it's body, and for some reason Mario wondered if they were its arms. But the cones didn't appear to have any hands or fingers, and they were slightly short for that matter. The thing's face was set in the middle of the sphere, which was the largest part of the creature; two bright blue eyes twinkling with amusement, tiny pink dimples on either side of the eyes, and a mouth currently set into a wide smile. It did not appear to have any discernable nose or ears, and didn't have a single hair on it anywhere. Finally, Mario noticed that it was wearing his cap.
"Hey!" Mario yelled. "That's my cap!" He didn't know if the creature would understand him, but he had to try. Apparently his words had some effect on it, though, because the grin immidiately vanished from its face. It motioned to the bright red cap it was wearing. "THIS cap?" It asked, in normal English (to Mario's infinite relief). Mario nodded. The creature pointed to the bush out of which it had jumped. "I was trying to sleep over there, just minding my own buisiness, when this thing flies out of nowhere and lands on my head! How do you explain that?" It fixed Mario with a piercing gaze.
"The wind blew it off my head. Can I have it back?" Mario pleaded.
"Yeah, of course you can have it back. You didn't think I was going to steal it, did you? But first I wanna see what powers this thing gave to me." Mario was about to ask what the pink ball was talking about, when the being closed its eyes, concentrated, and suddenly did one of Mario's Super Jumps! It landed, and chucked a couple red fireballs. Then the pink ball grabbed a nearby bush, uprooted it from the ground, and spun it around in a spin throw similar to the one Mario had used on Bowser when he'd fought for Princess Peach's Power Stars. Finally, the pink ball reached a cone-hand into the ground, and pulled up a turnip with eyes and a smiley face, just like Mario had been able to do during his adventure in Subcon. The pink ball threw the turnip aside, took off Mario's cap and handed it back to the plumber. "Nice. You've got some interesting abilities, ummm....Mr......"
"Mario. My name's Mario."
"Mario, right. Anyway, like I was saying, you've got some pretty cool abilities in that cap."
Mario was about to explode with unanswered questions, and couldn't decide which one to ask first. Finally he settled on a relatively simple one. "Who are you?"
"That's right, I forgot to introduce myself. My name's Kirby. Before you ask, yes, I'm the same Kirby who defeated King DeDeDe and saved Dreamland from a plague of nightmares." The ball took a slight bow, not noticing Mario's increased confusion at his statement. Mario, for his part, decided to ignore the other titles attached to Kirby's name, at least until he understood where he was a little better.
"Next question. What the heck did you mean about my 'abilities'?"
Kirby's eyes widened. "Huh? You don't know?"
Of course I don't know, Mario thought irritably. Otherwise why would I be asking you?
Kirby slowly walked around Mario, studying him from all angles. "Yes, true, you don't look like a normal Dreamlander. I should have expected such." Kirby mused as he walked back to stand in front of Mario again. "You must have gotten here by sleeping."
Mario could only stare blankly. "What?"
Kirby waved the question off. "I'd better explain where you are first. This is the kingdom of Dreamland, the setting for all good dreams. Every dream you've ever had took place here. The landscape can change according to the dream that the person is having, making the person feel like he or she is experiencing it in a different place. Right now, however, you are looking at Dreamland as it is when unaffected by a dream."
Mario scratched his scalp (he hadn't put his cap on his head yet, for fear of getting it muddy). "So...you're saying that I'm inside one of my dreams??"
Kirby nodded. "Yup. Non-Dreamlanders like yourself are known as Reals here. Every time a Real goes to sleep, they come here for the duration of their dream. The strange thing is, though, is that you're not supposed to be able to see Dreamland like it is normally." Kirby waved a cone-arm around himself to indicate the landscape. "All this is supposed to be shaped to be the setting of your dream, but it hasn't yet. Something's wrong."
Mario nodded slowly. "Okay, I understand that part. But what do you mean about 'Dreamlanders', and how did my cap give you my abilities?"
Kirby smiled cutely and motioned toward himself. "Dreamlanders are native inhabitants of Dreamland that live here and see the place as it really is. I'm one of them. All of the other Dreamlanders look like me, too, except they aren't pink."
"As for your abilities," Kirby sighed, "this is where things get complicated. Okay, try to stay with me here, alright? Dreamlanders have always had one defining physical trait; an insatible appetite and love for sleeping."
Mario beamed. "Sounds like my kind of species!"
"May I continue? Thank you. Anyway, whenever we get hungry, we Dreamlanders usually just inhale whatever food is nearby."
Mario couldn't resist questioning this. "Inhale?"
"Like this." Kirby walked over to where the bush had formerly been, dug an arm into the ground, and pulled out an entire three-layer cake that somehow didn't have a speck of dirt on it. Mario's eyes bugged out and his mouth began to water as he noticed the fudge filling, vanilla icing, strawberry- flavored frosting in the shape of roses...
Kirby then opened his mouth so wide that it looked like his sphere of a body had been reduced to a semicircle. A slight whistling sound pierced Mario's ears as Kirby began to suck in air like a vacuum, pulling the cake directly into his mouth. He immediately swallowed it, although Mario had to wonder where the food went since Kirby didn't seem to have any stomach visible. "See? We inhale it. Anyway, about ten years ago this really egotistical penguin named DeDeDe tried to take over Dreamland and succeeded, proclaiming himself to be the land's 'king'. Problem is, DeDeDe doesn't know anything about being a king, so he never performs any administrative tasks himself. The people of Dreamland simply continued to live as they always have, and ignored DeDeDe entirely."
"A couple years later, however, 'King' DeDeDe finally decided to start abusing his power. He ordered that all the food in Dreamland be brought to him and placed in his own personal horde. The Dreamland citizens didn't like that, and they picked me to go stop him."
"DeDeDe somehow managed to hire a group of renegade Dreamlanders and other, non-native monsters. I think he did this by giving them all the food they could ever want in exchange for their services. He sent them out after me to delay or even halt my progress. One day, while I was avoiding these troops and travelling to DeDeDe's castle, I got so hungry that I swallowed one of the monsters. When I did so, the hat that the enemy had been wearing suddenly appeared on my head and I found myself able to do all the stunts that that enemy could do.
"I eventually learned that this would happen with any enemy I swallowed. I'd earn a hat modeled after the enemy I'd beaten and would be able to use it's powers. Sometimes, if I found an Ability Hat on the ground, I could simply pick it up, wear it, and automatically get some new abilities. I called this new trick my 'Copy' ability, and I've been using it ever since during my adventures. Any questions?"
"Just one." Mario replied. Kirby noticed that he was a faint shade of green. "I thought you said that these 'enemies' were also Dreamlanders in DeDeDe's employment. Do you mean to say that you practice cannibalism when you eat them?"
Kirby threw his round head back and began laughing, much to Mario's chagrin. "N-no, I don't." Kirby managed to gasp out after a minute or so of mirth. "When I swallow the enemies, they aren't actually eaten, per se. They just get transformed into the caps and leave behind a little bit of energy to keep my body going. If I want, I can change the hats back into Dreamlanders at any time, except that when I do so the Dreamlander will want to help me in my quest instead of fight me. Don't ask me why, I still can't figure it out."
Mario took a deep breath and let out a huge sigh of relief. "Oh, okay." He studied the cap he held in his hands closely. "So you're saying that if you wear my cap, you can automatically copy my abilities and do everything I can do?"
Kirby nodded. "In a nutshell, yes."
"Wow." He paused. "That's awesome. You're the ultimate doppelganger!"
Kirby chuckled and grinned. "Yeah, I guess I am, aren't I?"
"So what are you doing currently? Any adventures going on right now?"
Kirby's expression changed to become serious. "Yeah, I was going to go investigate some strange events that have been occurring in Dreamland recently. Lately, Reals who enter here by dreaming are seeing the unaffected Dreamland, something that isn't supposed to happen. Not only that, but often those that this happens to find themselves unable to leave after they arrive here. Other Reals have been unable to enter Dreamland at all recently, and therefore have been unable to sleep."
Mario was shocked. "Oh man, that's horrible! Being unable to ever sleep - that's one of my worst nightmares!"
Kirby looked at Mario curiously. "A nightmare, huh? Those are supposed to be rare occurrances around here. Has this nightmare been happening often as of late?"
Mario thought for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, it has."
Kirby frowned in sudden thought. "Not good. That means that something is seriously wrong around here. I was going to go see if I could fix this, but now it seems even worse than I thought."
"Let me help!" Mario spoke up suddenly. "I hate having nightmares! And I really don't want the one about endless insomnia to come true! I'll go with you to fix the problem."
Kirby eyed him again with that piercing look. "Well, you do have some pretty good abilities, as indicated by your cap. And you look like you could do pretty well in a fight. But we'll have to get you cleaned up first."
Mario remembered his dirty appearance and nodded slightly, more than a little embarrassed at the thought of adventuring while looking like a Mud Monster.
"Come on, there's a fresh stream nearby where you can wash off." Kirby waved him over and began walking away through the trees. Mario quickly followed.
Link was completely absorbed in his reading. He was currently at a part that spoke about one ancestor's trip to the Dark World (an alternate- universe Hyrule) in order to save the royal princess of that time period from Ganon's evil clutches. So absorbed was he, in fact, that he didn't notice the sounds of a scuffle coming from downstairs. His head jerked up in surprise, however, when he suddenly heard a bloodcurdling scream echo through the building. Not even pausing to think, he quickly buckled his equipment on and raced out of his room.
Out in the hall, doors were opening and guests were sticking their heads out, wondering what was the cause of the noise they'd just heard. Link tried to calm them as he went past, saying that everything was under control and that they could go back to their rooms. He heard a familiar voice shout for him to wait up and he slowed, waiting while Luigi caught up to him.
Link began to run at full speed again when Luigi was beside him, only pausing long enough to give the plumber a sideways glance. Without turning around, he asked Luigi, "Where's your brother? I thought he'd want to help with this."
Unseen to Link, Luigi shook his head. "Mario could sleep through an earthquake. I'm not surprised that he could sleep through this, too."
Link gave the faintest of nods and upped his speed slightly. Luigi began to ask whom it was that had made the noise, when another scream abruptly split the air. They winced and held their eardrums as the sound reverberated off the walls and amplified itself in the hall, growing to a deafening pitch. This scream was long and drawn-out, sounding desperate and with a note of pain in it as well. Link's eyes grew wide in realization as he recognized the voice. He stopped dead in his tracks, his expression turning to stone and his fiery gaze becoming capable of cutting through solid ice. "That's Malon." He whispered to no one in particular.
Suddenly he leapt to life. "Malon!" He yelled as he went for broke and started running full-tilt towards the end of the hall and the stairs that awaited there. He reached it and took the stairs down three at a time, leaping over the last five to the ground and stumbling slightly before resuming his fearful run to the front desk. "MALON!"
He unsheathed his sword and buckled his shield onto his other arm as he rounded the corner and entered the lobby. The sight that met him almost caused him to drop both.
Six-foot-tall, bipedal creatures in heavy armor had entered the building armed with spears and had taken ahold of Malon. They had the faces of pigs, with long canine teeth jutting up from their lower jaws on either side of their snouts. They were called Moblins, he remembered.
The nearest Moblin stared at Link in surprise for the briefest moment before suddenly grabbing Malon from another moblin's grasp and pulling her in front of him as a shield, pinning her arms to her sides with one hand and placing the razor-sharp edge of its spear a half-inch away from her throat with the other. Slowly it backed away, clearly intending to use the girl as a hostage for their escape. Link felt an uncontrollable fury swelling inside him at this, threatening to explode violently as he saw her helpless face in the monster's grip. She was crying, giving loud wracking sobs that shook her entire body as the tears came unbidden down her face. She looked toward Link pleadingly, begging him to help her through her eyes. But Link knew that he couldn't do anything while the pig had a hold of her.
With its head, the beast motioned for Link to drop his sword. Link remained motionless, his grip on the Kokiri Sword's handle never slacking. The moblin pressed the spear's blade against Malon's skin slightly, provoking louder sobs from the hostage in question. Link's sword fell to the ground with a dull clang as he released it. He couldn't let them hurt her, no matter what the price.
Luigi tried to keep up with Link. He really did. But the Hylian's pace was so swift that he soon found himself falling further and further behind. His breaths came in quick pants. His legs began to ache. He didn't have the endurance to keep running so fast for much longer.
Finally Luigi slowed to a halt and leaned breathlessly against the wall, wheezing and coughing. He needed to start running more often, he reflected. This was ridiculous. Finally his breath returned and he began wondering where Link might have gone.
Luigi's thoughts trailed off as he heard some sort of noise coming from downstairs. Curious, he lay down flat on the floor and pressed his ear up against it. It sounded like something metal hitting the floor, and someone grunting something...
The floor gave an ominous creak.
Luigi lifted his head back up and looked at it nervously. Uh-oh...
The moblin seemed to smile, the action twisting its features into an even more grotesque shape than before. Making sure to keep Link within its eyesight, it turned its head and grunted to some of the other pig-beasts around it in a language Link couldn't understand. One of them stepped forward with a length of chain held between its hands, obviously planning to tie him up with it. He allowed the monster to approach him without a struggle, knowing that the apparent lead Moblin holding Malon wouldn't hesitate to slit her throat at the slightest hint of hostility from him.
There was one thing that the lead Moblin hadn't counted on, however. And that was Luigi suddenly crashing through the ceiling on top of its head. Malon was immediately released from its grip as the monster fell to the floor in a heap, knocked out cold. Luigi stumbled unsteadily to his feet, swiftly took in the scene around him, grabbed Malon's hand and raced away, spiriting her to safety.
Link gave a mental sigh of relief as Luigi escaped with Malon. There's one less headache he had to worry about. In one swift move he ducked and rolled toward the group of Moblins, snatching up his sword from where he'd dropped it on the floor. He came up and immediately parried a strike from one of the monsters, thrusting his sword through its chest. It gave a single pained squeal before evaporating. He backfipped over a low swipe that one of the other pig-beasts had aimed at him, and ducked as another threw its spear at his head. The spear sailed over him and directly into another Moblin who had been sneaking up on him from behind, destroying it. Link picked up the dropped spear from behind him and hurled it right back at its owner, hitting it dead-on in the forehead. POOF, it was gone.
One of the moblins gave a war-cry and charged at him, spear held high above its head. Link ducked and swept its feet out from underneath it, then stabbed it repeatedly when it tumbled to the ground. A moment later there was only a faint mist of purple smoke where it had been. He sensed another Moblin attempting a surprise attack from behind him and lunged sideways as an enormous battle-axe swung down and embedded itself in the floor where he had been standing a moment earlier.
Link stared at the weapon in surprise as its owner attempted to dislodge it from the floor. None of the other Moblins he had seen were carrying anything other than spears. He looked at the monster who had swung it. Oh, it was the leader. Apparently it hadn't been knocked out, only stunned.
The axe lept away from the floor with much splintering and cracking of wood. The lead Moblin eyed Link with homicidal tendencies in its gaze. Then it began swinging the axe blindly in fury. Link easily darted out of the axe's range and considered his opponent from afar for a moment. The Moblin leader was wearing more armor than the others, and it was swinging its weapon around so much that he couldn't possibly get near it without getting a limb chopped off. But he noticed that its head remained unprotected. That gave Link an idea.
He swiftly reached into his sack and brought out his Hookshot. Aiming carefully, he fired it at the ceiling above the leader's head. In a flash he was pulled up to the position, leaving the Moblin below to look around in confusion and wonder where its prey had gone. Link hung by one hand to his Hookshot's handle, holding his sword with the other. With some more precision aiming, he let his sword drop, point-first, onto the leader's head.
The lead Moblin gave a strangled grunt as the point of the sword drove itself down through its skull, impaling itself on its brain. It twitched spasmodically once, then slowly fell forward, dissolving immediately upon landing.
Link wiggled the Hookshot out of its hold and dropped lightly to the floor, surveying the carnage around him and cautiously making sure no more monsters lied in wait. When none jumped out to greet him, he gave a mental sigh, picked his sword up from where it was left on the floor, sheathed it, and put his Hookshot away. He tried to recall which direction Luigi had taken Malon. Remembering it vividly, he set off in search of the two.
Mario ducked his head beneath the surface of the water, feeling the grime and mud wash away. He came up with a slight gasp; the water was COLD! He gritted his teeth and bared the low temperature as he splashed himself repeatedly to get all the mud off. His clothes would get wet, but so what? It was better than being filthy.
Kirby sat nearby, eating berries from a bush he'd found. His way of getting the berries off the bush was simple; He'd begin inhaling in front of the bush, and force of the suction would cause the berries to pluck themselves from their own stems and enter his mouth. Mario marveled at this method of eating. It seemed much faster and time-saving than more conventional ways. He set his shoes off to the side, and began wringing the water out of his gloves and socks. Long ago he'd noticed some of the stranger properties of the forest; namely, the way the trees were colored blue and yellow and how all of them looked like large fluffy batches of cotton candy when viewed from a distance. He hadn't spoken up about it, however, dismissing it as just being another of Dreamland's weird features.
He looked up and around himself at the forest again, realizing that there was something missing from this scene. Then it hit him. No sound. Apart from what he and Kirby made, the forest was dead silent. Even the stream in front of him lacked its usual bubbly noise. Mario peered around at the surrounding trees. No birds were perched in their branches. No squirrels climbed up their trunks. There was absolutely no other lifeforms there besides himself and his Dreamlander counterpart. It began to creep him out. What was wrong with this place?
Kirby finished his snack and licked his lips thoughtfully as he walked back over to where Mario was perched on the streambank. "Mmmm! Dee-licious! What's up, Mario?"
Mario waved about himself with his uncovered hands, indicating the scene around them. "Where's all the animals?"
Kirby cocked his head curiously. "What animals?"
"Birds! Squirrels! Rabbits! Foxes! Insects! You know, animals!"
"Oh, them. They're all probably inside the town on the forest's opposite side."
"Kirby?"
"Hmm?" Kirby asked. He was currently gluping down water from the stream like there was no tomorrow.
"Why would the animals be in the town?" Mario was now squeezing water out of his cap, while laying his gloves and socks out to dry.
Kirby finally stopped drinking by the gallon and answered. "The 'animals', as you call them, are intelligent beings that are about as tall as me. they can communicate with other Dreamlanders and such, as opposed to the primitive beasts I've seen in some Reals' dreams."
"Ah." Then the rest of Kirby's reply registered. "Wait a minute, you can see inside dreams?"
"Well, yeah. When Dreamland is affected by a dream, so are its inhabitants. The last dream of yours that I was in, I was a bird, I think. That was the one where you were flying, right?"
Mario remembered and nodded.
"If I remember correctly, at one point you were flying with me and a whole bunch of other Dreamlanders that had also turned into birds." Kirby shrugged his cone-arms (the motion appeared very strange to Mario, who couldn't see any shoulders for Kirby to shrug with) and went back to his drinking. Mario thought about this for a long time.
"Have you been inside every single one of my dreams?"
Kirby shook his head, which caused his whole pink body to shake. "No. Each dream that a Real has takes place in a small area of Dreamland. This way, several Reals can enter Dreamland at once. If you are in the area where a Real's dream takes place, you become part of the dream. When you leave the area, you return to normal. I just so happened to be around the area where your specific dream occurred when it did so. I've been inside a couple of your brother's dreams, though. And those two princesses that you protect, as well."
Mario dropped his cap in surprise. "How did you know--?"
"Aw, c'mon, you think they don't talk about you during their dreams? Give me a break! Anyway, you'd be pretty interested to see what happens in some of them. Especially that princess who always dresses in pink. What's her name? Pearl?"
"Peach." Mario corrected.
"Ah, yes. Peach. Yeah, her dreams are particularly intriguing..."
"Why? What happens in them?" Mario asked eagerly.
Kirby shook his head again. "Sorry, I can't tell you. Those dreams contain......personal stuff. You must understand, Mario, that dreams are the most direct route to the deepest and most secretive thoughts, feelings, desires, and fears of our souls, some of which your concious mind might not even know about. Your subconcious sends images of these things for your brain to see during sleep. To reveal something that private about a person would be equivalent to raping that person's mind. So unless Peach herself tells you about these things locked within her dreams, I cannot divulge any info."
"But not all dreams are meant to be subconcious messages." Mario protested.
"True. I've encountered some dreams that were totally random, making no sense at all and therefore being impossible to interpret. My guess is that your imagination creates those dreams rather than your subconcious. Peach's dreams, however, are not like that. Besides, what would you gain by learning about a dream someone had which made no sense?"
"Nothing, I guess." Was Mario's mumbled reply. "So....what you're telling me....is that you know my innermost thoughts and fears because of my dreams?"
Kirby hesitated before answering. "Well, I don't exactly know much about you, since I've only been in a couple of your dreams, and all of them seemed like your imagination created them. When it comes to other Reals, though, yes I do."
By now Mario's eyes were wide open and he was staring at the water in front of him blankly. He'd never feel the same about going to sleep again, ever. Knowing that someone could be watching you, finding out about the most private portions of your mind, while you were unable to stop your subconcious from showing them......it made his skin crawl just thinking about it. It was the ultimate invasion of privacy, he realized. He shivered, suddenly feeling very small and very, very alone.
Kirby placed a sympathetic cone on Mario's shoulder. "I know that I probably shouldn't have told you all that, but you would have found out about it eventually anyway. After all, it's more than likely that we'll run into another person's dream while you're here, so it's better that when we do so you'll know what is happening."
Mario nodded weakly. He turned to look at Kirby, and almost had a heart attack.
Standing where Kirby had been a moment before was a Koopa Troopa with a pink shell. Mario yelled and jumped to his feet, putting up his hands to ward off the familiar enemy. That's when he noticed his own hands. They were orangeish and had three fingers on them, along with a thumb. He looked at himself, and discovered that he was now a Koopa Troopa with a red shell.
"Well, speak of the devil. Someone's having a dream around here right now." The Kirby-Koopa exclaimed.
Mario looked around. The forest, stream, and night sky were gone, replaced by the familiar creepy setting of Bowser's Castle. Mario's stomach gave a queer lurch. He had a feeling that he knew whose dream he was in right now, and he desperately didn't want to be there.
"Oh, no..." He whimpered.
A trumpet call blared from somewhere to their right. Mario noticed that they were currently in the large entrance hall just in front of the castle's front door. Other Koopa Troopas who had been mingling together in the area suddenly dashed to either side of the hall and stood shoulder-to- shoulder with their backs to the walls. Kirby did the same, and Mario joined him at one of the sides.
The grand oaken doors leading to the interior of the castle opened with a flourish. There, standing arm-in-arm with Bowser, was Princess Peach.
Mario felt his jaw drop. She looked nothing like the proper dignified lady he knew. Her pink gown, hand-lace and high-heels were gone, replaced by a sleek black leather jumpsuit that showed off her graceful curves perfectly. A black leather bullwhip also hung curled at her side. The normal golden tiara on her head had been replaced by a much larger one, though it was not as elaborate as the crown Bowser was currently wearing.
Bowser...Mario could hardly believe his eyes. The Koopa King was wearing a black-and-white tuxedo with a black bow tie and a top hat that he had placed over the jeweled crown he wore. He even had a little black cane to walk with clutched in his right claw. He looked sophisticated and almost gentlemany. It was as if Peach and Bowser had suddenly changed personas, he realized.
Bowser and Peach began walking into the room, holding each other in their eyes and never letting go of one another's arms. Mario almost felt like he was going to be sick.
The couple stopped walking at the middle of the hallway. At this point Bowser managed to tear his gaze away from Peach to address the troops on either side of the room. "At ease, men."
The troops visibly relaxed, and Mario tried to calm his growing feeling of dread.
"My loyal soldiers," Bowser began in a kind, friendly voice not at all like the gruff growl Mario was used to, "I have called you here today because out of the entire army at my disposal, you have proven yourselves to be the greatest. You have performed the best in the field and here at home, so I have chosen to make an announcement to you earlier than the rest of the army."
The feeling of dread was very acute now, almost a physical pain. Bowser cast another love-filled gaze at the woman at his side, then spoke a phrase that would haunt Mario for the rest of his days.
"We're going to have a baby!"
The entire two lines of Koopas gasped as one, then erupted into simultaneous cheers. Mario looked at Peach's face. She was blushing at the attention, but wore a heartfelt smile as she gazed around at the celebrating soldiers.
Now Mario really DID feel like he was going to be sick. His face turned a pale shade of green and he had to clench his jaw shut tightly to keep his lunch from landing all over the floor. As the happy couple walked back through the interior doors with a crowd of cheering Koopas behind them, Mario remained rooted to the spot, focusing completely on resisting the gag reflex. It's just a dream, he told himself repeatedly. It's just a dream, it's not real, Peach doesn't really love Bowser, it isn't true, it's just a dream......
He didn't notice Kirby place a supportive hand onto his shoulder, nor did he notice as the landscape suddenly melted back into Dreamland. A splash of water from the stream in front of him alerted him to this a moment later, though. With a weak smile to Kirby, who was now his normal pink puffball self, Mario walked over to behind a tree and quietly retched.
He remained there for another five minutes, only stopping when there was nothing left in his stomach for him to throw up. Even then, Mario still felt queasy. Peach and Bowser! He couldn't believe it. It was undoubtedly Bowser who'd thought the dream up, since Peach refused to even be near Bowser in real life. Who would've thought that Bowser felt that way about her? Mario had always believed that Bowser had kept kidnapping Peach simply to force him and Luigi to come to the Koopa's castle. He had no idea that the giant turtle might have had ulterior motives behind these acts.
Mario didn't know what to do. He'd just had a very personal look into the mind of his worst enemy. He felt like screaming, laughing, and crying, all at the same time. Finally all he could do was hold his head in his hands and slowly sink to his knees as the implications of all this hit him full force.
Then he realized. Bowser had just kidnapped Peach again before trapping him and Luigi in Hyrule! He'd also taken Daisy with him, for that matter. Who knows what he'd do with them?
Mario leaped to his feet, the queasiness replaced by a sudden feeling of urgency. He ran back over to where Kirby still stood next to the stream. "Quick, do you know a way I can get back home?"
Kirby was rather startled. "But Dreamland-"
"I'll come back to help you fix it later. Right now there's something I need to take care of back home." Mario's face hardened as he recalled the image of Peach holding Bowser's arm and him holding hers. He would NOT allow that to happen.
Kirby suddenly seemed uneasy. "Um...Mario...you know how I said that some Reals who come here are unable to leave?"
"Yeah? So what?" Mario asked impatiently. The more time he was spending here, the more worried he was getting about Peach.
"Well...you're one of them."
Mario stopped thinking altogether for about five seconds.
"WHAT?!?"
"I could tell from that dream we were in just now...only residents of Dreamland change to suit the dreams of Reals." Kirby explained uncomfortably. "Dreamland itself now considers you to be one of its residents, Mario."
Mario was reeling in shock. How could this happen? He asked himself. All he'd ever wanted to do was live in peace and protect Peach. Now he's stuck here and on the verge of losing her!
Wait a minute, he paused. Why should he be worried? Peach hated Bowser in real life, he knew that. How many times had she told him how much she loathed his prescence because he'd kidnapped her? She'd never fall in love with him...
A new, more horrible thought dawned on Mario.
....unless Bowser has Kamek brainwash her or something...
"Is there any way for me to get back?" Mario asked desperately.
Kirby fidgeted nervously. He didn't like this line of questioning. "Yes, if we go and fix what's wrong with Dreamland...once whatever's wrong has been righted, Dreamland should recognize you for what you really are and let you go back to your reality."
Mario sighed, his shoulders slumping. He seemed to have lost all of his steam at once. He'd been hoping for some quick, temporary solution to the problem so he could go rescue Peach, but now it looked like he'd be here for a while. "All right. Let's go, then." He groaned.
"If it helps, I know that there's another Real who's stuck here housed in the town on the other side of the forest..." Kirby suggested quickly. "He might know of some way to help you get back out of here, if only temporarily."
Mario perked up slightly as a ray of hope pierced his stormclouds of despair. His face brightened itself slightly. "Okay, then. Let's go see this guy." Not waiting for an answer, he leaped over the river and dashed off into the forest.
Kirby shook his head and leaped after him. "Mario! Wait! The village is THAT way!"
Mario stopped, turned, and walked back to Kirby feeling sheepish. "Sorry."
"C'mon, you'd better let me lead if you want to get anywhere." Kirby snapped. He was slightly irritated that Mario felt he could just up and leave him there like that. He began walking into the forest in a different direction, with an embarrassed Mario trailing along behind him at a discreet distance.
Luigi burst out of the door to the inn, Malon's hand clutched tightly in his. He had to get out of there, and NOW!
He searched frantically for a hiding place inside the ranch. To his right lay the wide pasture that housed the horses during the daytime. To his left the rest of the inn and the front entrance to the ranch spread out before him. In front of him were the stables for the animals.
Luigi was about to go enter the stables, when he noticed a small, inconspicuous building out in one corner of the pasture. After a moment's hesitation, during which the sounds of battle could be heard inside the inn, Luigi began pulling Malon toward that building. "C'mon! We've got to hide!"
"B-but Link...w-w-what about L-Link?" Malon stuttered fearfully. She cast a worried glance back at the inn as they ran.
"He can take care of himself." Luigi assured her, while praying that he was right. "For now, we've got to get you to safety."
They pelted across the open area toward the building at the far end, hoping that there they might find a safe haven.
Link burst out of the door to the inn. He had to find those two, and NOW!
He looked around himself for a hiding place they might have gone to. To his right the pasture lay in open view. To his left was the ranch entrance and the other part of the inn. In front of him were the animal stables where the cows and horses slept. He wondered if Malon and Luigi had hidden themselves in them. He disregarded the idea at once. Too obvious. Luigi would probably want to find a place less conspicuous…
Link saw the tiny building in the pasture out of the corner of his eye. Perfect.
He raced off to the building quickly, hoping that the two escapees had gotten there safely.
By Stoney (stoney107@yahoo.com)
Chapter 3
KO'ed
Field of Dreams, ?:?? pm.
Mario opened his eyes to find himself on a small hill in a grassy prairie. He got to his feet, wondering where he was and how he'd gotten here. Hadn't he just fallen asleep in his hotel room? So how had he gone from there to completely lost in an unfamiliar setting? He became confused.
He looked up, and only grew more confused as he saw what was above him. The sky was black and dotted with stars, indicating that it was nighttime in this place, wherever he was. But the landscape around him was lit up as if it were daytime, despite there being no visible source of light. He took off his cap and scratched his head in puzzlement. Then he realized something.
He looked at himself to find that he was no longer in his pajamas, but back in his work clothes. How'd he get dressed without knowing it? He placed his cap back onto his head, shooting bewildered glances at his surroundings. None of this was making any sense.
Not knowing what else to do, he picked a random direction and began walking. He had to admit, the scene around him was kind of pretty. Trees could be seen marking the edge of a forest in the distance, but between here and there only a few towering oaks broke up the monotony of the gently swaying grass. He rested beneath one of these trees, leaning against it's smooth trunk and shivering slightly in its shade. A gentle wind came along and fanned his face. He sat down with a sigh, and smiled. If this place wasn't so weird, he could almost get used to it.
The wind picked up suddenly, turning into a violent gale that swept Mario's cap clean off his head with no warning at all. Mario opened his eyes as he felt the unfamiliar coldness on his scalp, and felt around up there to find his precious cap missing. He gasped in horror, then looked around himself frantically and spied the cap being blown away toward the forest. He immediately leaped to his feet and ran after the slowly diminishing hat as fast as he could go, praying that he wouldn't lose his most prized possession to the powerful forces of nature.
The cap grew farther away and Mario upped his pace, his breath beginning to come in shorter and shorter breaths until he was almost gasping for air. He willed himself to go faster anyway, not noticing that the cap had almost been blown to the forest by now.
The precious garment entered the grove of trees and snagged itself upon a limb. The wind tugged against it, almost seeming angry at the resistance. But the branch held firm, and Mario ran faster, hoping to grab the cap before the wind tore it loose.
He entered the forest, but failed to notice the bizarre shape of the trees, or the odd coloring of their leaves; his focus was completely on his bright red cap waving in the wind. He was almost to it! Just a couple more feet...
The branch suddenly gave a sharp snapping sound, and with a cry Mario lunged.
With a sickening crack, the branch broke, freeing the cap from its anchor. Mario's hand stretched for it but caught only air, as the wind yanked it just out of his reach. Mario suddenly found himself falling from his lunge to land face down in the mud, still cap-less and beginning to despair.
With a squelch he came away from the muddy ground and pulled himself to his feet. Wiping the slimy liquid from his eyes, he saw the cap be twirled through the air by random gusts of wind before uncerimoniously landing in a bush. Hope surged through him anew. He quickly raced toward the bush to retrieve the hat.
He stopped short and skidded to a halt as the bush gave a loud rustle and shook itself. He eyed the plant warily. Was there intelligent plantlife in this place? Maybe he shouldn't violate the bush's personal space. After all, he hailed from a kingdom of walking, talking fungi. Walking, talking shrubbery just seemed like the next evolutional step.
In the next second he found out that the source of the shaking wasn't the bush itself but something inside the bush, as something large, round and pink jumped out of it at him. He gave a startled yell and backpedaled frantically, only to trip over the forgotten broken branch and land on his rear in the mud. He quickly stood back up to face off with his attacker, noticing with dismay his dirty appearance.
The round pink thing stopped its advancing and began snickering, then chuckling. Then it pointed at Mario and laughed out loud at his predictament. The plumber was covered from head to foot in ugly brown mud, bits of it falling off him to land on the ground with a plop! as the rest of it oozed into his shoes and gloves. With what dignity he had left Mario attempted to wipe the mud off himself. Unfortunately, it was hopeless. He finally gave up and turned to get a good look at his would-be attacker.
The thing was short, around half Mario's height, completely round, and colored a bright luminescent pink. It had two red triangles sticking out from it's base, which Mario assumed were its feet. Two pink cones stuck out to either side of it's body, and for some reason Mario wondered if they were its arms. But the cones didn't appear to have any hands or fingers, and they were slightly short for that matter. The thing's face was set in the middle of the sphere, which was the largest part of the creature; two bright blue eyes twinkling with amusement, tiny pink dimples on either side of the eyes, and a mouth currently set into a wide smile. It did not appear to have any discernable nose or ears, and didn't have a single hair on it anywhere. Finally, Mario noticed that it was wearing his cap.
"Hey!" Mario yelled. "That's my cap!" He didn't know if the creature would understand him, but he had to try. Apparently his words had some effect on it, though, because the grin immidiately vanished from its face. It motioned to the bright red cap it was wearing. "THIS cap?" It asked, in normal English (to Mario's infinite relief). Mario nodded. The creature pointed to the bush out of which it had jumped. "I was trying to sleep over there, just minding my own buisiness, when this thing flies out of nowhere and lands on my head! How do you explain that?" It fixed Mario with a piercing gaze.
"The wind blew it off my head. Can I have it back?" Mario pleaded.
"Yeah, of course you can have it back. You didn't think I was going to steal it, did you? But first I wanna see what powers this thing gave to me." Mario was about to ask what the pink ball was talking about, when the being closed its eyes, concentrated, and suddenly did one of Mario's Super Jumps! It landed, and chucked a couple red fireballs. Then the pink ball grabbed a nearby bush, uprooted it from the ground, and spun it around in a spin throw similar to the one Mario had used on Bowser when he'd fought for Princess Peach's Power Stars. Finally, the pink ball reached a cone-hand into the ground, and pulled up a turnip with eyes and a smiley face, just like Mario had been able to do during his adventure in Subcon. The pink ball threw the turnip aside, took off Mario's cap and handed it back to the plumber. "Nice. You've got some interesting abilities, ummm....Mr......"
"Mario. My name's Mario."
"Mario, right. Anyway, like I was saying, you've got some pretty cool abilities in that cap."
Mario was about to explode with unanswered questions, and couldn't decide which one to ask first. Finally he settled on a relatively simple one. "Who are you?"
"That's right, I forgot to introduce myself. My name's Kirby. Before you ask, yes, I'm the same Kirby who defeated King DeDeDe and saved Dreamland from a plague of nightmares." The ball took a slight bow, not noticing Mario's increased confusion at his statement. Mario, for his part, decided to ignore the other titles attached to Kirby's name, at least until he understood where he was a little better.
"Next question. What the heck did you mean about my 'abilities'?"
Kirby's eyes widened. "Huh? You don't know?"
Of course I don't know, Mario thought irritably. Otherwise why would I be asking you?
Kirby slowly walked around Mario, studying him from all angles. "Yes, true, you don't look like a normal Dreamlander. I should have expected such." Kirby mused as he walked back to stand in front of Mario again. "You must have gotten here by sleeping."
Mario could only stare blankly. "What?"
Kirby waved the question off. "I'd better explain where you are first. This is the kingdom of Dreamland, the setting for all good dreams. Every dream you've ever had took place here. The landscape can change according to the dream that the person is having, making the person feel like he or she is experiencing it in a different place. Right now, however, you are looking at Dreamland as it is when unaffected by a dream."
Mario scratched his scalp (he hadn't put his cap on his head yet, for fear of getting it muddy). "So...you're saying that I'm inside one of my dreams??"
Kirby nodded. "Yup. Non-Dreamlanders like yourself are known as Reals here. Every time a Real goes to sleep, they come here for the duration of their dream. The strange thing is, though, is that you're not supposed to be able to see Dreamland like it is normally." Kirby waved a cone-arm around himself to indicate the landscape. "All this is supposed to be shaped to be the setting of your dream, but it hasn't yet. Something's wrong."
Mario nodded slowly. "Okay, I understand that part. But what do you mean about 'Dreamlanders', and how did my cap give you my abilities?"
Kirby smiled cutely and motioned toward himself. "Dreamlanders are native inhabitants of Dreamland that live here and see the place as it really is. I'm one of them. All of the other Dreamlanders look like me, too, except they aren't pink."
"As for your abilities," Kirby sighed, "this is where things get complicated. Okay, try to stay with me here, alright? Dreamlanders have always had one defining physical trait; an insatible appetite and love for sleeping."
Mario beamed. "Sounds like my kind of species!"
"May I continue? Thank you. Anyway, whenever we get hungry, we Dreamlanders usually just inhale whatever food is nearby."
Mario couldn't resist questioning this. "Inhale?"
"Like this." Kirby walked over to where the bush had formerly been, dug an arm into the ground, and pulled out an entire three-layer cake that somehow didn't have a speck of dirt on it. Mario's eyes bugged out and his mouth began to water as he noticed the fudge filling, vanilla icing, strawberry- flavored frosting in the shape of roses...
Kirby then opened his mouth so wide that it looked like his sphere of a body had been reduced to a semicircle. A slight whistling sound pierced Mario's ears as Kirby began to suck in air like a vacuum, pulling the cake directly into his mouth. He immediately swallowed it, although Mario had to wonder where the food went since Kirby didn't seem to have any stomach visible. "See? We inhale it. Anyway, about ten years ago this really egotistical penguin named DeDeDe tried to take over Dreamland and succeeded, proclaiming himself to be the land's 'king'. Problem is, DeDeDe doesn't know anything about being a king, so he never performs any administrative tasks himself. The people of Dreamland simply continued to live as they always have, and ignored DeDeDe entirely."
"A couple years later, however, 'King' DeDeDe finally decided to start abusing his power. He ordered that all the food in Dreamland be brought to him and placed in his own personal horde. The Dreamland citizens didn't like that, and they picked me to go stop him."
"DeDeDe somehow managed to hire a group of renegade Dreamlanders and other, non-native monsters. I think he did this by giving them all the food they could ever want in exchange for their services. He sent them out after me to delay or even halt my progress. One day, while I was avoiding these troops and travelling to DeDeDe's castle, I got so hungry that I swallowed one of the monsters. When I did so, the hat that the enemy had been wearing suddenly appeared on my head and I found myself able to do all the stunts that that enemy could do.
"I eventually learned that this would happen with any enemy I swallowed. I'd earn a hat modeled after the enemy I'd beaten and would be able to use it's powers. Sometimes, if I found an Ability Hat on the ground, I could simply pick it up, wear it, and automatically get some new abilities. I called this new trick my 'Copy' ability, and I've been using it ever since during my adventures. Any questions?"
"Just one." Mario replied. Kirby noticed that he was a faint shade of green. "I thought you said that these 'enemies' were also Dreamlanders in DeDeDe's employment. Do you mean to say that you practice cannibalism when you eat them?"
Kirby threw his round head back and began laughing, much to Mario's chagrin. "N-no, I don't." Kirby managed to gasp out after a minute or so of mirth. "When I swallow the enemies, they aren't actually eaten, per se. They just get transformed into the caps and leave behind a little bit of energy to keep my body going. If I want, I can change the hats back into Dreamlanders at any time, except that when I do so the Dreamlander will want to help me in my quest instead of fight me. Don't ask me why, I still can't figure it out."
Mario took a deep breath and let out a huge sigh of relief. "Oh, okay." He studied the cap he held in his hands closely. "So you're saying that if you wear my cap, you can automatically copy my abilities and do everything I can do?"
Kirby nodded. "In a nutshell, yes."
"Wow." He paused. "That's awesome. You're the ultimate doppelganger!"
Kirby chuckled and grinned. "Yeah, I guess I am, aren't I?"
"So what are you doing currently? Any adventures going on right now?"
Kirby's expression changed to become serious. "Yeah, I was going to go investigate some strange events that have been occurring in Dreamland recently. Lately, Reals who enter here by dreaming are seeing the unaffected Dreamland, something that isn't supposed to happen. Not only that, but often those that this happens to find themselves unable to leave after they arrive here. Other Reals have been unable to enter Dreamland at all recently, and therefore have been unable to sleep."
Mario was shocked. "Oh man, that's horrible! Being unable to ever sleep - that's one of my worst nightmares!"
Kirby looked at Mario curiously. "A nightmare, huh? Those are supposed to be rare occurrances around here. Has this nightmare been happening often as of late?"
Mario thought for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, it has."
Kirby frowned in sudden thought. "Not good. That means that something is seriously wrong around here. I was going to go see if I could fix this, but now it seems even worse than I thought."
"Let me help!" Mario spoke up suddenly. "I hate having nightmares! And I really don't want the one about endless insomnia to come true! I'll go with you to fix the problem."
Kirby eyed him again with that piercing look. "Well, you do have some pretty good abilities, as indicated by your cap. And you look like you could do pretty well in a fight. But we'll have to get you cleaned up first."
Mario remembered his dirty appearance and nodded slightly, more than a little embarrassed at the thought of adventuring while looking like a Mud Monster.
"Come on, there's a fresh stream nearby where you can wash off." Kirby waved him over and began walking away through the trees. Mario quickly followed.
Link was completely absorbed in his reading. He was currently at a part that spoke about one ancestor's trip to the Dark World (an alternate- universe Hyrule) in order to save the royal princess of that time period from Ganon's evil clutches. So absorbed was he, in fact, that he didn't notice the sounds of a scuffle coming from downstairs. His head jerked up in surprise, however, when he suddenly heard a bloodcurdling scream echo through the building. Not even pausing to think, he quickly buckled his equipment on and raced out of his room.
Out in the hall, doors were opening and guests were sticking their heads out, wondering what was the cause of the noise they'd just heard. Link tried to calm them as he went past, saying that everything was under control and that they could go back to their rooms. He heard a familiar voice shout for him to wait up and he slowed, waiting while Luigi caught up to him.
Link began to run at full speed again when Luigi was beside him, only pausing long enough to give the plumber a sideways glance. Without turning around, he asked Luigi, "Where's your brother? I thought he'd want to help with this."
Unseen to Link, Luigi shook his head. "Mario could sleep through an earthquake. I'm not surprised that he could sleep through this, too."
Link gave the faintest of nods and upped his speed slightly. Luigi began to ask whom it was that had made the noise, when another scream abruptly split the air. They winced and held their eardrums as the sound reverberated off the walls and amplified itself in the hall, growing to a deafening pitch. This scream was long and drawn-out, sounding desperate and with a note of pain in it as well. Link's eyes grew wide in realization as he recognized the voice. He stopped dead in his tracks, his expression turning to stone and his fiery gaze becoming capable of cutting through solid ice. "That's Malon." He whispered to no one in particular.
Suddenly he leapt to life. "Malon!" He yelled as he went for broke and started running full-tilt towards the end of the hall and the stairs that awaited there. He reached it and took the stairs down three at a time, leaping over the last five to the ground and stumbling slightly before resuming his fearful run to the front desk. "MALON!"
He unsheathed his sword and buckled his shield onto his other arm as he rounded the corner and entered the lobby. The sight that met him almost caused him to drop both.
Six-foot-tall, bipedal creatures in heavy armor had entered the building armed with spears and had taken ahold of Malon. They had the faces of pigs, with long canine teeth jutting up from their lower jaws on either side of their snouts. They were called Moblins, he remembered.
The nearest Moblin stared at Link in surprise for the briefest moment before suddenly grabbing Malon from another moblin's grasp and pulling her in front of him as a shield, pinning her arms to her sides with one hand and placing the razor-sharp edge of its spear a half-inch away from her throat with the other. Slowly it backed away, clearly intending to use the girl as a hostage for their escape. Link felt an uncontrollable fury swelling inside him at this, threatening to explode violently as he saw her helpless face in the monster's grip. She was crying, giving loud wracking sobs that shook her entire body as the tears came unbidden down her face. She looked toward Link pleadingly, begging him to help her through her eyes. But Link knew that he couldn't do anything while the pig had a hold of her.
With its head, the beast motioned for Link to drop his sword. Link remained motionless, his grip on the Kokiri Sword's handle never slacking. The moblin pressed the spear's blade against Malon's skin slightly, provoking louder sobs from the hostage in question. Link's sword fell to the ground with a dull clang as he released it. He couldn't let them hurt her, no matter what the price.
Luigi tried to keep up with Link. He really did. But the Hylian's pace was so swift that he soon found himself falling further and further behind. His breaths came in quick pants. His legs began to ache. He didn't have the endurance to keep running so fast for much longer.
Finally Luigi slowed to a halt and leaned breathlessly against the wall, wheezing and coughing. He needed to start running more often, he reflected. This was ridiculous. Finally his breath returned and he began wondering where Link might have gone.
Luigi's thoughts trailed off as he heard some sort of noise coming from downstairs. Curious, he lay down flat on the floor and pressed his ear up against it. It sounded like something metal hitting the floor, and someone grunting something...
The floor gave an ominous creak.
Luigi lifted his head back up and looked at it nervously. Uh-oh...
The moblin seemed to smile, the action twisting its features into an even more grotesque shape than before. Making sure to keep Link within its eyesight, it turned its head and grunted to some of the other pig-beasts around it in a language Link couldn't understand. One of them stepped forward with a length of chain held between its hands, obviously planning to tie him up with it. He allowed the monster to approach him without a struggle, knowing that the apparent lead Moblin holding Malon wouldn't hesitate to slit her throat at the slightest hint of hostility from him.
There was one thing that the lead Moblin hadn't counted on, however. And that was Luigi suddenly crashing through the ceiling on top of its head. Malon was immediately released from its grip as the monster fell to the floor in a heap, knocked out cold. Luigi stumbled unsteadily to his feet, swiftly took in the scene around him, grabbed Malon's hand and raced away, spiriting her to safety.
Link gave a mental sigh of relief as Luigi escaped with Malon. There's one less headache he had to worry about. In one swift move he ducked and rolled toward the group of Moblins, snatching up his sword from where he'd dropped it on the floor. He came up and immediately parried a strike from one of the monsters, thrusting his sword through its chest. It gave a single pained squeal before evaporating. He backfipped over a low swipe that one of the other pig-beasts had aimed at him, and ducked as another threw its spear at his head. The spear sailed over him and directly into another Moblin who had been sneaking up on him from behind, destroying it. Link picked up the dropped spear from behind him and hurled it right back at its owner, hitting it dead-on in the forehead. POOF, it was gone.
One of the moblins gave a war-cry and charged at him, spear held high above its head. Link ducked and swept its feet out from underneath it, then stabbed it repeatedly when it tumbled to the ground. A moment later there was only a faint mist of purple smoke where it had been. He sensed another Moblin attempting a surprise attack from behind him and lunged sideways as an enormous battle-axe swung down and embedded itself in the floor where he had been standing a moment earlier.
Link stared at the weapon in surprise as its owner attempted to dislodge it from the floor. None of the other Moblins he had seen were carrying anything other than spears. He looked at the monster who had swung it. Oh, it was the leader. Apparently it hadn't been knocked out, only stunned.
The axe lept away from the floor with much splintering and cracking of wood. The lead Moblin eyed Link with homicidal tendencies in its gaze. Then it began swinging the axe blindly in fury. Link easily darted out of the axe's range and considered his opponent from afar for a moment. The Moblin leader was wearing more armor than the others, and it was swinging its weapon around so much that he couldn't possibly get near it without getting a limb chopped off. But he noticed that its head remained unprotected. That gave Link an idea.
He swiftly reached into his sack and brought out his Hookshot. Aiming carefully, he fired it at the ceiling above the leader's head. In a flash he was pulled up to the position, leaving the Moblin below to look around in confusion and wonder where its prey had gone. Link hung by one hand to his Hookshot's handle, holding his sword with the other. With some more precision aiming, he let his sword drop, point-first, onto the leader's head.
The lead Moblin gave a strangled grunt as the point of the sword drove itself down through its skull, impaling itself on its brain. It twitched spasmodically once, then slowly fell forward, dissolving immediately upon landing.
Link wiggled the Hookshot out of its hold and dropped lightly to the floor, surveying the carnage around him and cautiously making sure no more monsters lied in wait. When none jumped out to greet him, he gave a mental sigh, picked his sword up from where it was left on the floor, sheathed it, and put his Hookshot away. He tried to recall which direction Luigi had taken Malon. Remembering it vividly, he set off in search of the two.
Mario ducked his head beneath the surface of the water, feeling the grime and mud wash away. He came up with a slight gasp; the water was COLD! He gritted his teeth and bared the low temperature as he splashed himself repeatedly to get all the mud off. His clothes would get wet, but so what? It was better than being filthy.
Kirby sat nearby, eating berries from a bush he'd found. His way of getting the berries off the bush was simple; He'd begin inhaling in front of the bush, and force of the suction would cause the berries to pluck themselves from their own stems and enter his mouth. Mario marveled at this method of eating. It seemed much faster and time-saving than more conventional ways. He set his shoes off to the side, and began wringing the water out of his gloves and socks. Long ago he'd noticed some of the stranger properties of the forest; namely, the way the trees were colored blue and yellow and how all of them looked like large fluffy batches of cotton candy when viewed from a distance. He hadn't spoken up about it, however, dismissing it as just being another of Dreamland's weird features.
He looked up and around himself at the forest again, realizing that there was something missing from this scene. Then it hit him. No sound. Apart from what he and Kirby made, the forest was dead silent. Even the stream in front of him lacked its usual bubbly noise. Mario peered around at the surrounding trees. No birds were perched in their branches. No squirrels climbed up their trunks. There was absolutely no other lifeforms there besides himself and his Dreamlander counterpart. It began to creep him out. What was wrong with this place?
Kirby finished his snack and licked his lips thoughtfully as he walked back over to where Mario was perched on the streambank. "Mmmm! Dee-licious! What's up, Mario?"
Mario waved about himself with his uncovered hands, indicating the scene around them. "Where's all the animals?"
Kirby cocked his head curiously. "What animals?"
"Birds! Squirrels! Rabbits! Foxes! Insects! You know, animals!"
"Oh, them. They're all probably inside the town on the forest's opposite side."
"Kirby?"
"Hmm?" Kirby asked. He was currently gluping down water from the stream like there was no tomorrow.
"Why would the animals be in the town?" Mario was now squeezing water out of his cap, while laying his gloves and socks out to dry.
Kirby finally stopped drinking by the gallon and answered. "The 'animals', as you call them, are intelligent beings that are about as tall as me. they can communicate with other Dreamlanders and such, as opposed to the primitive beasts I've seen in some Reals' dreams."
"Ah." Then the rest of Kirby's reply registered. "Wait a minute, you can see inside dreams?"
"Well, yeah. When Dreamland is affected by a dream, so are its inhabitants. The last dream of yours that I was in, I was a bird, I think. That was the one where you were flying, right?"
Mario remembered and nodded.
"If I remember correctly, at one point you were flying with me and a whole bunch of other Dreamlanders that had also turned into birds." Kirby shrugged his cone-arms (the motion appeared very strange to Mario, who couldn't see any shoulders for Kirby to shrug with) and went back to his drinking. Mario thought about this for a long time.
"Have you been inside every single one of my dreams?"
Kirby shook his head, which caused his whole pink body to shake. "No. Each dream that a Real has takes place in a small area of Dreamland. This way, several Reals can enter Dreamland at once. If you are in the area where a Real's dream takes place, you become part of the dream. When you leave the area, you return to normal. I just so happened to be around the area where your specific dream occurred when it did so. I've been inside a couple of your brother's dreams, though. And those two princesses that you protect, as well."
Mario dropped his cap in surprise. "How did you know--?"
"Aw, c'mon, you think they don't talk about you during their dreams? Give me a break! Anyway, you'd be pretty interested to see what happens in some of them. Especially that princess who always dresses in pink. What's her name? Pearl?"
"Peach." Mario corrected.
"Ah, yes. Peach. Yeah, her dreams are particularly intriguing..."
"Why? What happens in them?" Mario asked eagerly.
Kirby shook his head again. "Sorry, I can't tell you. Those dreams contain......personal stuff. You must understand, Mario, that dreams are the most direct route to the deepest and most secretive thoughts, feelings, desires, and fears of our souls, some of which your concious mind might not even know about. Your subconcious sends images of these things for your brain to see during sleep. To reveal something that private about a person would be equivalent to raping that person's mind. So unless Peach herself tells you about these things locked within her dreams, I cannot divulge any info."
"But not all dreams are meant to be subconcious messages." Mario protested.
"True. I've encountered some dreams that were totally random, making no sense at all and therefore being impossible to interpret. My guess is that your imagination creates those dreams rather than your subconcious. Peach's dreams, however, are not like that. Besides, what would you gain by learning about a dream someone had which made no sense?"
"Nothing, I guess." Was Mario's mumbled reply. "So....what you're telling me....is that you know my innermost thoughts and fears because of my dreams?"
Kirby hesitated before answering. "Well, I don't exactly know much about you, since I've only been in a couple of your dreams, and all of them seemed like your imagination created them. When it comes to other Reals, though, yes I do."
By now Mario's eyes were wide open and he was staring at the water in front of him blankly. He'd never feel the same about going to sleep again, ever. Knowing that someone could be watching you, finding out about the most private portions of your mind, while you were unable to stop your subconcious from showing them......it made his skin crawl just thinking about it. It was the ultimate invasion of privacy, he realized. He shivered, suddenly feeling very small and very, very alone.
Kirby placed a sympathetic cone on Mario's shoulder. "I know that I probably shouldn't have told you all that, but you would have found out about it eventually anyway. After all, it's more than likely that we'll run into another person's dream while you're here, so it's better that when we do so you'll know what is happening."
Mario nodded weakly. He turned to look at Kirby, and almost had a heart attack.
Standing where Kirby had been a moment before was a Koopa Troopa with a pink shell. Mario yelled and jumped to his feet, putting up his hands to ward off the familiar enemy. That's when he noticed his own hands. They were orangeish and had three fingers on them, along with a thumb. He looked at himself, and discovered that he was now a Koopa Troopa with a red shell.
"Well, speak of the devil. Someone's having a dream around here right now." The Kirby-Koopa exclaimed.
Mario looked around. The forest, stream, and night sky were gone, replaced by the familiar creepy setting of Bowser's Castle. Mario's stomach gave a queer lurch. He had a feeling that he knew whose dream he was in right now, and he desperately didn't want to be there.
"Oh, no..." He whimpered.
A trumpet call blared from somewhere to their right. Mario noticed that they were currently in the large entrance hall just in front of the castle's front door. Other Koopa Troopas who had been mingling together in the area suddenly dashed to either side of the hall and stood shoulder-to- shoulder with their backs to the walls. Kirby did the same, and Mario joined him at one of the sides.
The grand oaken doors leading to the interior of the castle opened with a flourish. There, standing arm-in-arm with Bowser, was Princess Peach.
Mario felt his jaw drop. She looked nothing like the proper dignified lady he knew. Her pink gown, hand-lace and high-heels were gone, replaced by a sleek black leather jumpsuit that showed off her graceful curves perfectly. A black leather bullwhip also hung curled at her side. The normal golden tiara on her head had been replaced by a much larger one, though it was not as elaborate as the crown Bowser was currently wearing.
Bowser...Mario could hardly believe his eyes. The Koopa King was wearing a black-and-white tuxedo with a black bow tie and a top hat that he had placed over the jeweled crown he wore. He even had a little black cane to walk with clutched in his right claw. He looked sophisticated and almost gentlemany. It was as if Peach and Bowser had suddenly changed personas, he realized.
Bowser and Peach began walking into the room, holding each other in their eyes and never letting go of one another's arms. Mario almost felt like he was going to be sick.
The couple stopped walking at the middle of the hallway. At this point Bowser managed to tear his gaze away from Peach to address the troops on either side of the room. "At ease, men."
The troops visibly relaxed, and Mario tried to calm his growing feeling of dread.
"My loyal soldiers," Bowser began in a kind, friendly voice not at all like the gruff growl Mario was used to, "I have called you here today because out of the entire army at my disposal, you have proven yourselves to be the greatest. You have performed the best in the field and here at home, so I have chosen to make an announcement to you earlier than the rest of the army."
The feeling of dread was very acute now, almost a physical pain. Bowser cast another love-filled gaze at the woman at his side, then spoke a phrase that would haunt Mario for the rest of his days.
"We're going to have a baby!"
The entire two lines of Koopas gasped as one, then erupted into simultaneous cheers. Mario looked at Peach's face. She was blushing at the attention, but wore a heartfelt smile as she gazed around at the celebrating soldiers.
Now Mario really DID feel like he was going to be sick. His face turned a pale shade of green and he had to clench his jaw shut tightly to keep his lunch from landing all over the floor. As the happy couple walked back through the interior doors with a crowd of cheering Koopas behind them, Mario remained rooted to the spot, focusing completely on resisting the gag reflex. It's just a dream, he told himself repeatedly. It's just a dream, it's not real, Peach doesn't really love Bowser, it isn't true, it's just a dream......
He didn't notice Kirby place a supportive hand onto his shoulder, nor did he notice as the landscape suddenly melted back into Dreamland. A splash of water from the stream in front of him alerted him to this a moment later, though. With a weak smile to Kirby, who was now his normal pink puffball self, Mario walked over to behind a tree and quietly retched.
He remained there for another five minutes, only stopping when there was nothing left in his stomach for him to throw up. Even then, Mario still felt queasy. Peach and Bowser! He couldn't believe it. It was undoubtedly Bowser who'd thought the dream up, since Peach refused to even be near Bowser in real life. Who would've thought that Bowser felt that way about her? Mario had always believed that Bowser had kept kidnapping Peach simply to force him and Luigi to come to the Koopa's castle. He had no idea that the giant turtle might have had ulterior motives behind these acts.
Mario didn't know what to do. He'd just had a very personal look into the mind of his worst enemy. He felt like screaming, laughing, and crying, all at the same time. Finally all he could do was hold his head in his hands and slowly sink to his knees as the implications of all this hit him full force.
Then he realized. Bowser had just kidnapped Peach again before trapping him and Luigi in Hyrule! He'd also taken Daisy with him, for that matter. Who knows what he'd do with them?
Mario leaped to his feet, the queasiness replaced by a sudden feeling of urgency. He ran back over to where Kirby still stood next to the stream. "Quick, do you know a way I can get back home?"
Kirby was rather startled. "But Dreamland-"
"I'll come back to help you fix it later. Right now there's something I need to take care of back home." Mario's face hardened as he recalled the image of Peach holding Bowser's arm and him holding hers. He would NOT allow that to happen.
Kirby suddenly seemed uneasy. "Um...Mario...you know how I said that some Reals who come here are unable to leave?"
"Yeah? So what?" Mario asked impatiently. The more time he was spending here, the more worried he was getting about Peach.
"Well...you're one of them."
Mario stopped thinking altogether for about five seconds.
"WHAT?!?"
"I could tell from that dream we were in just now...only residents of Dreamland change to suit the dreams of Reals." Kirby explained uncomfortably. "Dreamland itself now considers you to be one of its residents, Mario."
Mario was reeling in shock. How could this happen? He asked himself. All he'd ever wanted to do was live in peace and protect Peach. Now he's stuck here and on the verge of losing her!
Wait a minute, he paused. Why should he be worried? Peach hated Bowser in real life, he knew that. How many times had she told him how much she loathed his prescence because he'd kidnapped her? She'd never fall in love with him...
A new, more horrible thought dawned on Mario.
....unless Bowser has Kamek brainwash her or something...
"Is there any way for me to get back?" Mario asked desperately.
Kirby fidgeted nervously. He didn't like this line of questioning. "Yes, if we go and fix what's wrong with Dreamland...once whatever's wrong has been righted, Dreamland should recognize you for what you really are and let you go back to your reality."
Mario sighed, his shoulders slumping. He seemed to have lost all of his steam at once. He'd been hoping for some quick, temporary solution to the problem so he could go rescue Peach, but now it looked like he'd be here for a while. "All right. Let's go, then." He groaned.
"If it helps, I know that there's another Real who's stuck here housed in the town on the other side of the forest..." Kirby suggested quickly. "He might know of some way to help you get back out of here, if only temporarily."
Mario perked up slightly as a ray of hope pierced his stormclouds of despair. His face brightened itself slightly. "Okay, then. Let's go see this guy." Not waiting for an answer, he leaped over the river and dashed off into the forest.
Kirby shook his head and leaped after him. "Mario! Wait! The village is THAT way!"
Mario stopped, turned, and walked back to Kirby feeling sheepish. "Sorry."
"C'mon, you'd better let me lead if you want to get anywhere." Kirby snapped. He was slightly irritated that Mario felt he could just up and leave him there like that. He began walking into the forest in a different direction, with an embarrassed Mario trailing along behind him at a discreet distance.
Luigi burst out of the door to the inn, Malon's hand clutched tightly in his. He had to get out of there, and NOW!
He searched frantically for a hiding place inside the ranch. To his right lay the wide pasture that housed the horses during the daytime. To his left the rest of the inn and the front entrance to the ranch spread out before him. In front of him were the stables for the animals.
Luigi was about to go enter the stables, when he noticed a small, inconspicuous building out in one corner of the pasture. After a moment's hesitation, during which the sounds of battle could be heard inside the inn, Luigi began pulling Malon toward that building. "C'mon! We've got to hide!"
"B-but Link...w-w-what about L-Link?" Malon stuttered fearfully. She cast a worried glance back at the inn as they ran.
"He can take care of himself." Luigi assured her, while praying that he was right. "For now, we've got to get you to safety."
They pelted across the open area toward the building at the far end, hoping that there they might find a safe haven.
Link burst out of the door to the inn. He had to find those two, and NOW!
He looked around himself for a hiding place they might have gone to. To his right the pasture lay in open view. To his left was the ranch entrance and the other part of the inn. In front of him were the animal stables where the cows and horses slept. He wondered if Malon and Luigi had hidden themselves in them. He disregarded the idea at once. Too obvious. Luigi would probably want to find a place less conspicuous…
Link saw the tiny building in the pasture out of the corner of his eye. Perfect.
He raced off to the building quickly, hoping that the two escapees had gotten there safely.