Summary: Artemis Fowl the Second does not participate in Christmas parties. This time he might just make an exception… and he learns more than he has never expected. Held in Haven. A Christmas fanfic.

Disclaimer: I do not own ANY of the Artemis Fowl characters. They belong to the most wonderful writer in the world, Eoin Colfer (crowd applauds, or rather, ants)

I made this story for I had a sudden burst of inspiration for writing a Christmas fic, as meaningful as I tried to make it. I would like to give credit to my elder sister who helped me correct some grammar mistakes. Now let's get on with the story.

Sorry but I have serious writer's block for The Intruder of Haven. It was my first fic and first fics are hardly successful. Well for me of course. I may not continue it and I am sorry to those little ants that enjoyed chewing up my shreds of paper where the fic was contained.

Extra stuff: I wrote in a book, then copied from it and typed on the computer. I find that doing it this way helps me with the plot instead of typing on the computer.

IMPORTANT: Artemis has somehow gotten back his memories. If he didn't this fic won't work. So let's keep that in mind and finally move on.

He Dreams of a White Christmas Chapter One: The Unwanted Invitation

Artemis Fowl stared bleakly out of the window; his slow, calm breathing fogging up the window pane. Big fat snowflakes drifted from the cold, grey sky, landing silently on the snow-covered ground. He sighed, fogging up the window pane even more. Christmas. It had to come every year. The presents that piled up rapidly beneath the Christmas tree; aunts and uncles cooing and pinching his cheeks; mistletoe and holly dangling from the ceiling of Fowl manor. He hated it. The Christmas spirit had always spread to everyone except this pale fourteen year old. The mere mention of Santa Claus could send Artemis into a series of rolling-eye-and-raising-eyebrow actions. Occasionally, he even had to go to the toilet if he could bear the nonsense no longer.

Worse, today was Christmas Eve. The day when all those aunts and uncles came to swamp the manor, searching frantically for the heir to the Fowl fortune. Artemis smirked. He remembered the time when an over-excited aunt had approached him, waving her arms frantically and reached out to pinch the genius's pale cheek. A glare shot frostily at her had sent her cowering for the rest of the party. He reached up and brushed some dark hair from his brow. Both Juliet and Butler were absent from his side. They had gone to celebrate Christmas with their parents.

He sighed one last time, wiped away the mist on the freezing window pane and was about to stand up when a loud beep from his laptop indicated he had mail. Artemis felt decidedly curious in spite of himself. Who would send him email on Christmas Eve? Unless it was the fairies – no it couldn't be. Artemis shook his head subconsciously as he opened his laptop.

His mouth fell open without him knowing it.

From: Holly Short

To: Artemis Fowl

Subject: Invitation

Hey mud boy. For some reason Julius invited you to our annual Christmas party. Bet it's for sentimental reasons or something. He ordered me to email you this invitation. It's tonight, at 8 pm so I'll come at pick you up now. It's too bad if you're not wearing your mud-man suit and walking stark naked in your room. Just tell me to close my eyes when I arrive.

Holly

Artemis could feel a vampire smile forming on his lips. As if he would be walking stark naked in his room! Unfortunately, he didn't want to go to the 'Christmas party'. He detested them, but Holly hadn't given him a chance to decline the invitation. He hoped he could tell Holly when she arrived. Suddenly, his printer automatically printed out the invitation. Artemis grabbed a pair of loafers and pulled them on (gently though, for he had no intention of spoiling his expensive shoes.

Dear Artemis Fowl the Second,

You have been specially invited to our annual Christmas party. You are the first mud man ever in the history of Haven to be invited to this party. Your absence in your manor will be unknown as our technician will be replacing you with a simulated Artemis while you are gone. The whole of Haven will be attending this party. Your attendance is compulsory. An elf will be sent to pick you up shortly.

Yours truly,

Wing Commander Vinyaya

(Commander Root was supposed to write this but he changed his mind. I wonder why.)

Just as Artemis read the last sentence, there was a loud rapping on the window.

"Fowl! Do you expect me to freeze out here all night? Let me in!"

Ah. Artemis walked over and opened the window. A gust of wind blew a figure right across his enormous bedroom and it smashed into a tapestry embroidered with Santa Claus his mother had insisted to hang on his wall. A pile of snow was rising slowly beneath his window pane and Artemis had big handfuls of snow on his suit and in his hair, with a tiny fleck right on the tip of his nose. Artemis shut the window with difficulty and turned to the figure.

"Holly?" he said uncertainly.

"Who else? San D'Klass come to give you a present?" she said sarcastically as she brushed snow off her suit and slid up her visor. Artemis was delicately picking snowflakes off his suit and his hair.

"Come on, the party's starting."

Artemis stayed in his spot.

"Come on!" cried Holly.

"I'm not going," he said coolly.

"You have to,' said Holly, making contact with the boy's piercing blue eyes, her voice layered with bass and alto. Artemis tried to fight it but in vain. Satisfied, Holly wrapped the mud boy in cam foil.

"Now, sleep. I can't bear anymore of your sarcastic comments," said Holly as she clipped the snoozing mud boy onto her Moonbelt, tugged open the window and flew out, soaring over the crowds of people chattering excitedly in think coats and tall leafy Christmas trees over-decorated with ornaments. She sighed. Christmas Eve. And she hoped Artemis would come to understand it when Christmas Day arrived.

I'm trying to make this as humorous and as meaningful as possible. So yeah. Please review and tell me what you think of this fic. You realize I'm not going "Hey ya'll!" or "HIES!!!" because I'm serious about this fic. I'll try to complete it by Christmas Eve. Yay for I'm STILL eleven. YAY!!! Err… that's a bit too random and lame. Okay, maybe this is too serious and people won't take me for real. I hope. Not.

I shall not say Merry Christmas! Yet.  REVIEW!!! Oh yeah, I'm not caring about the italics thing in Vinyaya's name for she will be barely mentioned... Again, press that little Go button now!