Greetings to all my readers and reviewers! The winners are…

AgiVega, Black Aliss, Holly Rox, VampirePeaches, Electric Fire, RaevenDawn and Cyberspace!!! Congratulations!!!

((Hands out large bags of cookies))

All of you mentioned Trouble in your reviews, so it's counted. I think. Actually, Holly didn't have a date, she didn't even want to ask someone, but since Artemis asked… she can't lose face in front of the mud boy, can she? Oops, I revealed too much… haha.

But actually later on Trouble won't be her date, she just ASKED Trouble, yeah…

By the way, flames are UNWELCOME during the Christmas period. You can throw them into the bonfire instead, it sure will help.

Replies to reviewers!!!

Apologies to Aurum Potestas Est and Nemi Jade for not replying since you reviewed the first chapter! I wasn't online when I was typing the second chapter so I didn't know whether I received any new reviews! SORRY!

Aurum Potestas Est: Holly/Artemis? Hmm… Don't think so but they certainly will dance... Buckle up and get ready for this chapter! Thanks for reviewing!

Nemi Jade: I've updated! Whee! Thanks for reviewing!

Hiei's pet monkey: Haha… for no reason, ya noe I love torturing insects… just joking. Thanks for reviewing!

Lils Evans: Arty doesn't know how ta dance… too bad Arty, you can't dance properly with Holly – Okay fine I will shut up. Thanks for reviewing!!!

marsnmonkey: I don't even bother putting your name in bold and italics. That's lovely. "Strange" name you have though. ((Cough cough)) I hope you will not put your useless reviews in my review list anymore, it chocks up the place. Actually, must I even spend my time typing this??? ((Rolls eyes)) Wish Artemis were here to help me reply. I wouldn't need to waste my time then.

AgiVega: Nonono… Holly won't kidnap Arty just to have him as a date… haha great theory anyways. You mentioned Trouble, but lucky for you, I'm gonna torture Arty and make him and Holly dance… I have always worshipped you as a great author and you are actually reviewing me! I was sooo happy! Thank you!!! ((Worships)) AgiVega: Err…

Raven, Kee, Januarye, Kaedae: Haha… Sorry but I really have serious writer's block. ((Grins)) Thanks for reviewing!!!

yellowreviews: Hmm, that's right Jing Yi. I so totally agree with you. Thanks for reviewing!!!

Black Aliss: Haha! Thanks for reviewing!

Oakwood: ((gasps)) You're joking, right? Well, yeah, okay… hey you have an Artemis Fowl site?? Cool! Tell me the website!!! Thanks for reviewing!!!

Holly Rox: Yes, it's Trouble!!! No way it's Root! I don't like him!!! ((Pukes)) No one in the right mind would have Root as her date. Haha!! Thanks for reviewing!

VampirePeaches: Holly/Arty? Why does everyone keep asking me that? Maybe I'll make them accidentally move under the mistletoe but they jump apart, haha… actually I think I will do that. Thanks for reviewing!!!

Electric Fire: Foaly??? ((Splutters)) He can't dance! Holly will be nursing her sore feet by the end of the day!!! Because Foaly keeps stepping on them. ((Smirks)) I hate dresses too. They are… eugh. I prefer culottes. And my favorites are pants and jeans. Muahaha. I agree with you on flamers… Thanks for reviewing!

RaevenDawn: Poor him… not. NO NO NO!!! IT'S NOT THAT OVERWEIGHT COMMANDER (sorry if I'm insulting Root shippers out there)!!! He'll just be waddling around going ho ho ho. Haha. Thanks for pressing the button repeatedly!!! Thank you for reviewing as well!

Psychogrl: Really??? Check out Electric Fire's one then. I had inspiration from her fic! Thanks for reviewing!

Finally let me get on with the story. I have to keep adding new reviewers in the replying list… because I am receiving one from Psychogrl right now… I must finish this!!! I think it'll be done by Christmas, okay?

Chapter Three: Don't make a Fool of me

Truth was, Holly didn't actually have a date. She didn't bother asking someone, since she didn't know Fowl was coming. But due to this annoying mud boy, she had to look for a date. She groaned and glanced at Artemis. He was staring at her interestedly.

"What do you want, Fowl?" she said tiredly.

"Where's your date?" he asked innocently.

"What?!" cried Holly.

"Where's your date?" he repeated. Holly looked away and gazed around in hope of seeing any guy. Any guy would do. Anyone.

Just then, Root stomped through the open double doors, a huge smile on his face. He was wearing mud-man sized boots. Very unlike Root to act this cheery. It scared Holly. Then she saw Root's beard and buckled up, laughing.

"SHORT! WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT!!!" roared Root. Okay, not so cheery. Holly stood up and clutched the surface of Artemis's table, breathing heavily. She glanced at Root again and fought hard to keep a straight face.

"Erm… ah…" stuttered Holly, her stomach aching. She straightened up and tried to look professional. "Nothing, Commander." Wait. Could Root be her date? She felt like puking at the thought of it. Root? No way. So much for the any guy plan. She turned around glared at a smirking Artemis.

Root snorted and stalked off, probably to spend his time roaring at Foaly, since nobody had arrived yet. Holly glanced around frantically. Why was the place so empty! Where was everybody?

Suddenly, just as Holly was on the verge of admitting to Artemis she didn't have a date, the whole LEP force came trooping in. A lot of girls, definitely not in the LEP, were accompanying many of the guys. The big problem was Root had said the dress code was red and green. So you can imagine the sight that met Holly's eyes. The colours were so bright she had to squint to look properly at the officers.

"I think the Commander's taste of fashion is worse than Juliet's," commented Artemis, staring at the big clump of red and green. Holly nodded in agreement, looking at the blinding colours and trying to find a guy without a girl hanging on his arm. She spotted Grub who was tailing behind the crowd. He was clad in a bright red suit and a green tie. The biggest problem lay at his shoes.

"Blue?" said Artemis incredulously. Holly had to stifle her laughter. Grub looked very lonely and was searching possibly for Holly. She ducked underneath Artemis's table and continued searching for someone else. No way was she going to have a blue-shoed little brother of Trouble Kelp tailing at her feet.

Grub Kelp reminded her of Trouble. Hey, Trouble can be my date, she thought. But no doubt he would have girls hanging all over him. She sighed and stood up, accidentally banging her head on the bottom of the table.

"D'Arvit," she muttered and crawled out, rubbing her head and dearly longing for her helmet. A few of the officers had broken Root's rules, such as Chix, who was wearing a white tuxedo and getting severely reprimanded by Root. She stood up properly and approached the group, ignoring the mud boy. After all, she wasn't his baby-sitter. She glanced around for Trouble and spotted him getting some nettle smoothie at one of the many tables in the corner. Lili was already approaching him. Holly ran towards him and ended up tripping on her dress.

"Stupid, stupid dress," she said angrily and picked herself up, willing herself not to think about Artemis's annoying smirk probably plastered all over his face. She ran over to Trouble and placed a hand on his shoulder, gasping for breath. Trouble turned around, bewildered.

"Oh hi, Holly," he said.

"Trouble – need you – to be – my – date, or – Fowl will – irritate me for the rest of my life-" gasped Holly. Trouble grinned.

"Sure, whatever," he said. Lili frowned.

"Really, Captain, you need a new tactic," she whispered into Holly's ear as she glided past. Holly rolled her eyes and turned to look at Artemis. He wasn't at his table.

"D'Arvit," she breathed. She glanced at Trouble, then back at the empty table. Where was that mud boy? "Wait a minute, Trouble, I need to look for Fowl," she said quickly and before Trouble could reply she had dashed off.

Artemis watched Holly rush away from the table and smirked. No doubt she was looking for someone to pose as her date. She tripped on the hem of her dress and Artemis chuckled softly. He stood up and left the table. Time to get the spunky little elf into fits of frenzy.
"Artemis Fowl when I get my hands on you…" muttered Holly. She had been searching for practically half an hour and yet she couldn't find the mud boy. Everyone was enjoying themselves except her. Even Trouble had given up waiting for her and was being pulled along by Lili. Why was she, Holly Short, reduced to finding a stupid mud boy who had a habit of hiding? Curse Foaly for making the room so huge. She looked around angrily and ran to the Christmas tree, prepared to tear out leaves and branches just to express her anger and frustration at the smug centaur. Suddenly, she spotted a glint of blue in the leaves. Blue? Root wanted only red and green (as usual)! She peered in closer and saw the dim light of a laptop.

"Fowl…" she said threateningly. "Mud boy, come out here!"

Artemis smiled. She found him, finally.

"Are you playing a game of hide-and-seek, mud boy? Just to tell you, that game is not appropriate for criminal masterminds," said Holly through clenched teeth. She crawled through the leaves, pushing them away and occasionally breaking some of the branches just for the fun of it. Her head bumped into warm metal. Of course. The laptop. Holly slammed it shut and glared at Artemis.

"How did you smuggle a laptop here?" she hissed.

"I didn't. I found one here," said Artemis. Holly clapped a hand to her forehead in irritation. It was rather dark in the middle of the tree. Unable to spend a second longer alone with Artemis, she turned around and crawled out. Artemis smirked at Holly's back and replaced the laptop under the tree. On top of it said: Artemis Fowl.

"So, Holly," he said, facing Holly's back. "Where's your date?"

Holly didn't reply. She spared a glance at Trouble. He certainly wasn't enjoying himself with Lili's antics. Music was playing, the lights had dimmed further and many couples were dancing on the snow. In the snow would be more appropriate, since the fat snowflakes kept coming.

"Dancing," she said shortly, sitting alone at one of the elf-sized tables next to Artemis's. Artemis sat at his own table and his eyes fell on a small family of fairies embracing each other. Half of him felt a pang in his heart and the other half felt like leaving the room. He had been reminded of his parents.

"Missing them already?" asked Holly suddenly.

"No," said Artemis immediately. Holly could hear disgust in his voice. She sighed and stood up.

"I'm going to look for him," she said brusquely and left the table, leaving Artemis alone at his. Artemis sighed. He didn't know how many embraces he had to endure before he broke down.

Admittedly, this was the most boring Christmas he had ever experienced. Not the worst, though. The last few Christmases he had to suffer comprised of swooning aunts, uncles and swollen cheeks. He had a longing desire to crawl back under the tree and retrieve the laptop, which he suspected was given to him by either Foaly or Root. He tapped his fingers subconsciously on the surface of the table, watching Holly dance with another elf he did not recognize. Well, he didn't recognize most of the elves, anyway. Plus this Christmas he was receiving so many stares and whispers about 'the mud boy'. He felt out of place, but this was the worst feeling of isolation. At least he had been with his own species at school. This time he was sitting in the middle of short little fairies.

His brain was so bored it couldn't even spew interesting facts to keep him awake. Nor would it start bubbling and form another plan to earn more money. His stomach grumbled and he winced. At home he would be eating Christmas turkey and other fine delicacies brought up to his room by Butler, since he would refuse to eat at the table with everyone else and preferred to shut himself in his room, using his laptop.

Suddenly, a voice roused him from his thoughts.

"Hey, Fowl, do you want to dance?"

Artemis couldn't believe his ears. He stared down at the presently blurry elf. He blinked and his vision cleared. Wait. Was that Holly? Oh no. Oh no no no.

"What did you say?" he asked, clutching the edges of the table.

Holly rolled her eyes.

"I said. Do. You. Want. To. Dance," she said slowly. Artemis blinked again. She said that? Holly Short said that? Brilliant. Now he had to try and turn down her offer.

"If you don't know, Captain, I don't know how to," he said. Ah, now that would repel Holly.

"So what?" she said, grinned wickedly and pulled Artemis off the chair. Artemis gulped very uncharacteristically as he tripped over his own feet. His shoes sank into the now extremely thick snow as Holly whirled him around. Many of the elves had stopped dancing and their mouths had fallen open, staring at Artemis and Holly.

"Are you trying to make a fool of me or something?" he hissed. Holly smirked and twisted Artemis around so hard he fell on his behind. Holly stood in front of the fallen mud boy, arms crossed and smirking.

"Well, as a matter of fact, yes," said Holly, pulling Artemis to his feet and started whirling him around again. In a few seconds, Artemis felt so dizzy he couldn't see where he was going. So, he stepped on Holly's foot.

"D'ARVIT!!!" swore Holly loudly. The whole of Haven were staring at them now. The couples who had been dancing had quickly cleared the dancing area, so the only people covered in snow were Holly and Artemis. Artemis felt a headache coming. Not now, he thought furiously, massaging his temples. Holly stood up carefully and stepped hard on Artemis's foot.

"OW!!!" yelled Artemis, now clutching his own foot. He felt extremely embarrassed afterward, as 'ow' wasn't even a word. Unfortunately, before Artemis's foot even had a chance to heal, Holly had dragged him to his feet again and worsened his headache. Giving up, he obliged to Holly's vicious pulling, thinking that she had probably gotten drunk.

Back to Foaly and Root… err is that the Ops Booth? Yeah…

"Hey, Santa!!! Santa!!!" called Foaly as Root glared up at him through the camera in the room angrily. That was Foaly's new nickname for Root. "Come up here! I see something interesting!"

Root stomped up grudgingly to the Ops Booth. He had been moping around and going 'ho, ho, ho' monotonously to everyone, not even wanting to watch the dancing in the dancing area. He waited impatiently for Foaly to open the door and in the meantime, lit a fungus cigar and wedged it into the corner of his mouth.

"Uh-uh. No fungus cigars for Christmas, Santa," said Foaly, staring in distaste at the smoke billowing out from Root's nose. Root ignored the centaur and stalked into the Ops Booth. Foaly shook his head and closed the doors, hoping his air fresheners would work this time.

"You, donkey, are the one who forced me to wear this ridiculous outfit, so quit calling me SANTA!!!" roared Root suddenly, turning on the aforementioned donkey. Foaly flinched.

"Whatever. Anyway, I think Holly's a bit – drunk," he said, pointing to one of the screens. Holly was tugging a very weary-looking Artemis around in the snow. "Can I put some mud man songs on???"

Root stared suspiciously at Foaly.

"And where, may I ask, will you get them?"

Foaly flushed.

"Ah… I downloaded them long time ago," he said quickly. "We can have some fun with them," he added. Root rolled his eyes. Foaly always wanting to have fun. Typical. But since it was Christmas…

"Fine. Whatever. Make sure to humiliate Fowl," said Root generously. Foaly was so happy he jumped up and down in glee. Unfortunately, due to his four left hooves, he fell down on his behind. Root snorted. He made for the doors. Then he stopped midway.

"Choose those songs, if you catch my drift."

Yup, thought Foaly. He would definitely do that.

Actually I wanted to add the parts where Holly advises Artemis while they dance about the meaning of Christmas (the birth of Jesus Christ, err, the spirit of giving and love. Ewk. Well, family love ) but it would take too long, since this chapter is rather long already and I took a few hours typing this on the com because I crumpled up my draft of Chapter 3 and thought as I wrote.

So yeah. I think this chapter is as usual not as good as the others. This will have five chapters now, since I split Chapter Three into half. Sorry! My hands are aching! And my brain.

Reasons of Artemis being very OOC by hiding from Holly: He was bored. And somehow he knew there was going to be a present for him under the Christmas tree. So he stayed there and tried to make more money (realize he keeps thinking about money?). On the laptop.

Reasons for Holly wanting to dance with Artemis: She wanted to make a fool of him. And no, she wasn't drunk.

I think that answers ALMOST all of your questions. I don't really read into Trouble so tell me if he's OOC or not. Thanks! Actually I think he is.

Plus Root too. I mean, he WON'T ask Foaly to choose 'those songs' ya know! But I guess it's the Christmas spirit… You know what I mean by 'those songs'? You know, "those songs"? ((I'm so evil… NOTE: Hopefully no romance will be here. I mean, take a look at my AGE!!!))

Now press ze shinee gooolldd goooo barton! Wait it isn't gold. PRESS IT!!! ((Grins))