Amanda dragon- Sorry for the incredibly long wait!! I could only update my other fan fiction because the floppy went mad. Now I am having problems logging in, so don't expect the next chapter to be up so soon... THANK YOU FOR THE REVEIWS!! A BIG HUG TO ALL OF YOU!!

Bob- You missed me out you... you... FIEND!!

Amanda dragon- You didn't say the disclaimer!! SAY IT!!

Bob- No.

Amanda dragon- picks up a shoe

Bob- FINE!! I don't own the Legend of Zelda. But Amanda owns Owen and Amy

Amanda dragon- I couldn't resist typing this conflict between fairies and young girls...

Chapter 13- Poor, poor Link...

"Linky-poo!! Give me a hug!!" Ruto yelled at Link.

"NO!!" Link cried, prodding her away with a stick that he had found.

"Stop playing hard to get my Linky-dinky-pie!!"

"You'll never take me alive!!" he screamed and threw himself into the fast flowing Zora's river and shot down it like a rocket cart with a monkey in it.

"LIIIINK!! THE RIVER IS VERY FAST!!" Navi screamed, zooming up to the confuzzled Amy and Owen.

"HO LIGHT BULB!! IT DOESN'T TAKE A GENIOUS TO WORK OUT THAT!" Tatl shouted at Navi.

"COME BACK LINK!!" Tael yelled at the now long gone Link.

"He's gone you pathetic excuse for a blinking light bulb!" Navi shouted. With that, the fairies began quarrelling with each other.

Back to the hero that is zooming down the river at mach 2...

Link screamed like a pansy (a/n If pansies scream of course) as he swallowed up half of the river. The river spat him out, back onto Hyrule field. Link gratefully sucked up the air. He looked around to see if Ruto had ambushed him. There was no one around him... until he saw three flashing lights flying towards him. Link gasped in horror and ran. He ran until he crashed into a lady, a lady with red hair... MALON!!! (DUN DUN DUN!!)

"Oh! Linky-darling! I have not seen you in ages!!" The ranch girl cried, giving Link a hug that squeezed the life out of him.

"Ho! Get your hands offa my man!!" A girl in a green dress/skirt thing. Link's eyes went wide with horror as he recognised the fiend walking up to him. SALIA !!!(a/n I usually call her Saria -- It sounds better...)

"Your man? HE'S MINE SO GET LOST!!" Malon screamed, hugging Link like a boa constrictor with its prey.

"AWAY FROM LINKY-PIE-DEAR!!" The furious Ruto screamed. The three girls confronted each other (with Malon still holding Link in a death grip).

Back to the evil sinister gerudo dude...

Gannondorf was watching with glee from a tree (it rhymed!!). He snickered evilly as he saw Link's face go blue from lack of oxygen. Just then he had a brilliant evil plan. A plan so evil, that the devil would be ashamed that it did not think of it first. He boomed out an evil laugh, totally unaware that someone may notice him in the tree.

To the confuzzled Amy and Owen...

"Why don't we find someone so we can, like, go somewhere..." Amy mumbled.

"Dunno." Owen said while adjusting his sun glasses so that the sun won't get into his eyes.

"We are, like, standing here like sausages, baking in the sun..."

"Dunno." Owen said, just for the fun of it, while setting his umbrella up.

"I didn't ask a question you nitwit!"

"Dunno."

"Stop tormenting me with riddles!"

"Dunno."

"SHUT UP!!" Amy screamed that loud that Owen's umbrella blew away again and fell into Zora's River.

"NO!! My poor umbrella... You were so young..." Owen whimpered. "I SHALL SAVE YOU!!" he yelled while flinging himself into the river.

Amy sweat dropped, and walked down the path that no one had seemed to notice; until she saw the cuckoo (a/n is that how you spell it?). It was standing there, cleaning its feathers. Amy's eyes opened wider with anticipation as she crept towards it. She bent down and leapt and grabbed the poor cuckoo. The cuckoo struggled madly in her arms as she hugged it. "My wittle baby chicky-wicky! I shall name you... TOM TOM!!" She said. That poor, poor cuckoo...

To the unfortunate hero...

Link sighed as the girls and the fairies all argued with each other.

"He's my boyfriend!! Not yours fish face!!" Salia screamed.

"But out of it little girl!!"

"I am no little girl!!" Salia screeched.

"Shut up you tree hugger and you minger!" Malon yelled.

They both froze, confuzzled about Malon's choice of words.

"HO!! I HAVE FOUND A WAY TO SETTLE THIS!! US FAIRIES AGAINST EACH OF YOU IN A" Navi butted in, dramatically pausing to raise the atmosphere. "A GAME OF TUG-OF WAR!! WITH LINK AS THE ROPE!!"

Poor, poor Link...

Amanda dragon- Like it? Love it? I had to put it in!! A tug of war game with Link as the rope was irresistible to me!! Please read and review!! I will probably do a Halloween special or something...