Okay, so I had a big long chapter will all sorts of good stuff typed out
and then my computer went all not respond-y and shut Microsoft word down.
AND GUESS WHO HADNT SAVED? YEAH. ME.
Anyways, I wouldn't mind typing it all out again because I am a fast typer because we use laptops in school so I've learned to type fast, EXCEPT that currently I have no space bar, so for every space I have to pound the empty hole in the exact center like 20 times to get one space. So it is slightly time consuming. Needless to say, I am saving like a maniacal chicken. (or something)
My goal is to get this keyboard fixed so that I have a space bar.
Also, in the quest for a good name, here's what you lovely people came up with:
48 Hours (Pirate Bitch Nut) Friends can Turn, But Enemies Are Always There (Pirate Bitch Nut) Pirate Bitch Nut (Pirate Bitch Nut) Alstromerias Die But Roses Live (Pirate Bitch Nut) Love Link (Immortal Memories) Linkling Love (Immortal Memories) Love through Hate (Immortal Memories) Bondage (Syn) All The Wrong Places (The Original Title) Bonding (Current title)
And thanks to your lovely suggestions, I was able to pick one. Er well one picked me.
The new title is.....
BONDAGE!!!!
This one kind of jumped out at me because of the double meanings, you know, bonding and then the S&M definition.
Either way, THANK YOU SYN()!!!!!!! YOU WIN!!!! (Not that this was a competition, lol)
Wow. I'm sorry, that was a whole page of just me rambling... on with it now...
"S&M" is "sadism & masochism"... like whips and chains and sex kind of stuff. Dungeon play, if you will.
That being said, I will stop rambling now, because I know that I HATE IT when authors write pages and pages of stuff at the top of the story that I just have to scroll over. So I am very very apologetic.
On with it now...
PREVIOSLY....
He groaned. He hated jacking off.
Well, no, he didn't. What teenage boy hated it? But he hated it when it was all he had. He did a simple cleaning spell and snuggled back into the blankets which had been magically dried and were warm and cozy.
As he drifted off he half prayed that he would have no more dreams of Malfoy, and he half prayed that he would only dream of Malfoy. He was a very confused boy.
The next morning he couldn't even look Draco in the eye. He blushed bright red when he ran into him in the bathroom and mumbled a hurried excuse and fled. Draco had only smirked at him.
Harry didn't understand why he was dreaming about Malfoy, and why he liked it. He didn't understand at all. He tried to remember all the dirty things Malfoy had done to him, the awful things he had said. But somehow all he could do was discount them, and tell himself that Draco was a changed person. That he wasn't like that anymore.
Chapter five (for real this time)
Draco sat at the Slytherin table, talking lightly with his fellow classmates, when a small owl flew down to him and dropped a letter on his food. He picked up the parchment and wiped the maple syrup off it. It read:
Draco-
I need you and Harry to come to my office after breakfast for a quick conversation.
Headmaster Dumbledore
Draco looked across the Great Hall and saw Harry reading a similar letter. He shrugged. He didn't know what it was all about, but he wasn't worried or anything.
After Harry finished eating, he excused himself from Ginny and Dean and left the Great Hall, headed for the headmaster's office. Halfway down the hallway, Draco caught up to him.
"Any idea what this is about now?" Harry asked him.
"Nope."
After those brief words, they walked in silence. They weren't at each other's throats anymore, but they were far from being friends. Putting it in simple terms, they tolerated each other, but that was about it.
Harry knocked on the portrait and it swung open. Dumbledore was seated behind his large mahogany desk.
"Have a seat, boys," he greeted them. "Can I get you anything to drink? Tea? Pumpkin Juice?"
The two boys politely declined, and sat back waiting for the older wizard to begin speaking.
"We need to have a conversation about your future. It was brought to light that this bond is indeed not temporary, due the fact that Mr. Malfoy has been aware of the pairing for quite some time." He paused and took a sip of the tea in front of him. "We need to discuss how this effects both you, Harry, and Draco. This is quite a different situation now, it being a permanent bond and everything. How much do you know about permanent bonds, Harry? Draco, I'm assuming you have been informed by your parents." Draco grimaced, showing that he had, in fact, been told all the details. Harry however, looked somewhat lost.
"Sir, I don't really know much about it, except what I read in the library. I know that we are soul mates, and I know we 'need each other' but I don't know what that means." He said honestly.
Draco snickered and Harry shot him a death glare.
"Well, you are correct, you do need each other, and what that means, in the case of a permanent bond, is you need sufficient physical contact at least every 48 hours. I am aware that you are not the best of friends that Hogwarts has ever had, but I trust you will be able to make something work."
"So we just have to, like, touch?" Harry asked.
"That would be the easiest way to satisfy the bond, but you can also partake in any sort of meaningful conversation, so long as it brings you two closer, mentally. That may not be the easiest thing to do, in the beginning." Dumbledore paused and for once did not quite meet their eyes. "Now I have to ask you boys, and you understand why, I'm sure, but exactly what is your sexual orientation?"
Homosexuality was not regarded as anything out of the ordinary in the wizarding world, given that you could marry completely different species, gender was not made out to be that big of a deal. That didn't however, mean that it embarrassed the two boys any less.
Harry felt the blood rise to his face; this was the point where Draco would find out the truth. Or at least part of it. He was shocked though, to find that Draco did not burst out indignantly that he was completely heterosexual. There was an awkward silence and no one spoke. Finally Dumbledore cleared his throat.
"Well, the silence and your blushing tells me that the contact may not always be limited to verbal and platonic." Dumbledore's eyes twinkled in a way that made Harry fidget even more in his seat.
"For now, then," Dumbledore continued, "You will live in the tower together for the remainder of the year, and when summer holidays come, we will come up with a new plan. You may go to class now, I will owl your teachers to let them know why you were tardy. Have a nice morning." Dumbledore smiled warmly as his students stood awkwardly and left.
Harry had transfiguration, while Draco had herbology, and so the two parted ways outside of Dumbledore's office. Harry walked down the corridors to transfiguration and slipped inside, sitting next to Dean and pulling out his quill and parchment. As he began to take notes about the spell they would be using in that class, Dean leaned over to question him.
"Where were you?"
"Talking to Dumbledore."
"Why? About what? Anything to do with Hermione?"
"No. Draco. The linkling shit."
"Oh." With that Dean shut up and hurridly scribbled down his own notes. McGonagall demonstrated the transfiguration twice, changing her pillow into an Iguana, and then back to a pillow. After that, they were on their own to try to change their pillows.
After several times, Harry had a green scaly pillow and Dean had an Iguana that was polka dotted at had a white ruffle down it's back and buttons for eyes. Needless to say, they spend the better part of the class mastering this transfiguration. Harry couldn't figure out why though, he wasn't sure how transforming a pillow to a lizard was ever going to aide him further in his life. Either way, he did it eventually.
That night Harry skipped dinner, opting to go down to the kitchens himself and get a tray. While this was not technically, "allowed", the house elves were always falling over themselves backwards to please anyone they met, so it wasn't ever a problem to get a bit of food.
He ate in the tower, immersed in a book chronically many of the Quidditch stars of the century. The pictures were by far the best part, all in color and zooming around the pages.
He lost track of time and wound up reading, curled up by the fire, until late into the night. He was disturbed however, when Draco came stumbling in, once more. He was drunk again.
"Jesus Malfoy, I'm starting to think you're a bloody alcoholic." He said, half smirking and half smiling. But when he met Draco's eyes, something was different from the last time.
He wasn't giggling, he wasn't falling and laughing; he certainly wasn't confessing attraction to Harry. He just looked sad. Harry frowned, confused by the other boy.
"Are you okay?" he asked somewhat timidly. He stood up, meaning to go help Draco. He reached Draco and half-helped him to the couch where Draco flopped down and Harry returned to his curled up nook in the armchair. "Draco?"
Draco made no attempt at a response, but his eyes reflected a sort of sorrow that can only come from deep inside someone. A pain that wasn't caused by someone else, but by his own emotions, betraying everything he sought to uphold.
"Draco?" he tried again, more pressing this time.
"Oi! Malfoy!" he called loudly. Draco lifted his head at the shout and met Harry's eyes. His gaze was so intense that Harry had to look away. He focused on the flames and Draco finally spoke.
"I have a question, Potter."
"Yeah?"
"Do you have any idea what it's like to want something you can't ever have?"
"I guess, who doesn't know the feeling."
"That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about love. I'm talking about loving someone who won't ever love you back, someone who can't. Because "someone" won't ever get over the past, and look at the new person, not who I used to be."
"Who YOU used to be?" Harry questioned, catching Draco's slip.
"Who a hypothetical person used to be."
"Who did you used to be, Draco?" Harry questioned softly.
"I used to be a horrible person.. I did things I don't even want to think about, let alone speak out loud. I did things I'm so ashamed of. And I would give anything to take some of it back." Draco avoided eye contact, he stared blankly at the carpet, his eyes empty of anything except pain.
"But who are you now?"
"I'm different. I swear. I wouldn't ever do or say or think the same way as I did two years ago. I know now, I know the truth, I know right from wrong. I know dark from light. I know good from evil. I met 'evil'. I saw how it ruins lives. I saw it all. And I'm different now, because of it."
"I know you are." Harry moved to sit on the couch with Draco, though at his respective end.
"NO! No you don't know. You don't know, you say you do, but you don't believe me! I will always be the stupid arrogant death eater in training to you. Well I'm not anymore. I did the training, I did it all, and I regret it more than anything, but it's too late now. And because its too late, you won't ever believe that I'm really a different person."
Harry reached over and rolled Draco's sleeve up. He swallowed his gasp as he saw the dark mark burned into Draco's arm. He touched it lightly with two fingers, and Draco yanked his arm back.
"Don't touch it. It's disgusting. It's revolting, its repulsive, filthy, it's everything I'm not."
"I know."
"No." His voice cracked. "No you don't." A single tear traced a thin trail down his pale cheek. Harry reached up and brushed it aside.
Without thinking, he lowered his lips to Draco's and kissed him gently, his hand stayed up at his face, cradling Draco's cheek in his palm. After several seconds, Harry pulled back and looked at Draco, afraid of what he would see.
But just in his dream, all he saw was no more than lust and desire.
REVIEWWWWW REVIEWWWWW
I would have written more, but im in a pretty shitty mood due to a less than friendly email from my ex boyfriend. Basically saying Im a bitch, that I don't deserve his love, and that he fucking hates me and never wants to speak to me again. This was all in response to me telling him yesterday that we broke up 7 months ago, and I wanted him to leave me alone.
Either way, it's been kinda shaky on my end of the computer.
But that's a chapter.
So review. Make me feel better.
Curlytop: I love nothing more than loooong review that actually tell me something other than "I like the story". Not that I don't like those reviews, I love all of them. But long ones give me a sense of fulfillment, if you will. And for the record, I did come up with the linkling idea all on my very own, and I'm rather pleased with it.
Pirate Bitch Nut: Amusing, as always. Haha. Don't worry, your names weren't THAT bad. Haha I'm j/k. Thanks!
Syn(): Extra thanks, t'was you who named this lovely disaster of a story
Immortal Memories: thanks for the review, thanks for the name ideas.
Fi- thank you! I wouldn't ever call my writing wonderful (I think that's the word you used) but thank you!
GenX-revolution- sorry it's hard for you to understand, lol, everyone else seems to do fine though. If you could tell me what you don't understand about my writing fashion then maybe I can fix it... and for the record when I graduate next may, I'll be 17.
Liza Marie- I stuck the definition of S&M up at the top, well kinda.
Lyonessheart- don't worry I'm fixing all those annoying fake chapters, lol, but thanks for the warning
Nirvana Cheerleader- I've never read that story, but I'd be excited to read another one that's kinda like this, cause I thought I was the only one, so I'm curious how someone else does this general idea of a story. Thanks!
Draco23Luver Karma N0b0dys-ang31 Superstar09 Yana5
Anyone I forgot, which I'm almost sure wasn't very many, seeing as there aren't VERY MANY reviews to start with...
Thanks to you too!!
Top of Form
AND GUESS WHO HADNT SAVED? YEAH. ME.
Anyways, I wouldn't mind typing it all out again because I am a fast typer because we use laptops in school so I've learned to type fast, EXCEPT that currently I have no space bar, so for every space I have to pound the empty hole in the exact center like 20 times to get one space. So it is slightly time consuming. Needless to say, I am saving like a maniacal chicken. (or something)
My goal is to get this keyboard fixed so that I have a space bar.
Also, in the quest for a good name, here's what you lovely people came up with:
48 Hours (Pirate Bitch Nut) Friends can Turn, But Enemies Are Always There (Pirate Bitch Nut) Pirate Bitch Nut (Pirate Bitch Nut) Alstromerias Die But Roses Live (Pirate Bitch Nut) Love Link (Immortal Memories) Linkling Love (Immortal Memories) Love through Hate (Immortal Memories) Bondage (Syn) All The Wrong Places (The Original Title) Bonding (Current title)
And thanks to your lovely suggestions, I was able to pick one. Er well one picked me.
The new title is.....
BONDAGE!!!!
This one kind of jumped out at me because of the double meanings, you know, bonding and then the S&M definition.
Either way, THANK YOU SYN()!!!!!!! YOU WIN!!!! (Not that this was a competition, lol)
Wow. I'm sorry, that was a whole page of just me rambling... on with it now...
"S&M" is "sadism & masochism"... like whips and chains and sex kind of stuff. Dungeon play, if you will.
That being said, I will stop rambling now, because I know that I HATE IT when authors write pages and pages of stuff at the top of the story that I just have to scroll over. So I am very very apologetic.
On with it now...
PREVIOSLY....
He groaned. He hated jacking off.
Well, no, he didn't. What teenage boy hated it? But he hated it when it was all he had. He did a simple cleaning spell and snuggled back into the blankets which had been magically dried and were warm and cozy.
As he drifted off he half prayed that he would have no more dreams of Malfoy, and he half prayed that he would only dream of Malfoy. He was a very confused boy.
The next morning he couldn't even look Draco in the eye. He blushed bright red when he ran into him in the bathroom and mumbled a hurried excuse and fled. Draco had only smirked at him.
Harry didn't understand why he was dreaming about Malfoy, and why he liked it. He didn't understand at all. He tried to remember all the dirty things Malfoy had done to him, the awful things he had said. But somehow all he could do was discount them, and tell himself that Draco was a changed person. That he wasn't like that anymore.
Chapter five (for real this time)
Draco sat at the Slytherin table, talking lightly with his fellow classmates, when a small owl flew down to him and dropped a letter on his food. He picked up the parchment and wiped the maple syrup off it. It read:
Draco-
I need you and Harry to come to my office after breakfast for a quick conversation.
Headmaster Dumbledore
Draco looked across the Great Hall and saw Harry reading a similar letter. He shrugged. He didn't know what it was all about, but he wasn't worried or anything.
After Harry finished eating, he excused himself from Ginny and Dean and left the Great Hall, headed for the headmaster's office. Halfway down the hallway, Draco caught up to him.
"Any idea what this is about now?" Harry asked him.
"Nope."
After those brief words, they walked in silence. They weren't at each other's throats anymore, but they were far from being friends. Putting it in simple terms, they tolerated each other, but that was about it.
Harry knocked on the portrait and it swung open. Dumbledore was seated behind his large mahogany desk.
"Have a seat, boys," he greeted them. "Can I get you anything to drink? Tea? Pumpkin Juice?"
The two boys politely declined, and sat back waiting for the older wizard to begin speaking.
"We need to have a conversation about your future. It was brought to light that this bond is indeed not temporary, due the fact that Mr. Malfoy has been aware of the pairing for quite some time." He paused and took a sip of the tea in front of him. "We need to discuss how this effects both you, Harry, and Draco. This is quite a different situation now, it being a permanent bond and everything. How much do you know about permanent bonds, Harry? Draco, I'm assuming you have been informed by your parents." Draco grimaced, showing that he had, in fact, been told all the details. Harry however, looked somewhat lost.
"Sir, I don't really know much about it, except what I read in the library. I know that we are soul mates, and I know we 'need each other' but I don't know what that means." He said honestly.
Draco snickered and Harry shot him a death glare.
"Well, you are correct, you do need each other, and what that means, in the case of a permanent bond, is you need sufficient physical contact at least every 48 hours. I am aware that you are not the best of friends that Hogwarts has ever had, but I trust you will be able to make something work."
"So we just have to, like, touch?" Harry asked.
"That would be the easiest way to satisfy the bond, but you can also partake in any sort of meaningful conversation, so long as it brings you two closer, mentally. That may not be the easiest thing to do, in the beginning." Dumbledore paused and for once did not quite meet their eyes. "Now I have to ask you boys, and you understand why, I'm sure, but exactly what is your sexual orientation?"
Homosexuality was not regarded as anything out of the ordinary in the wizarding world, given that you could marry completely different species, gender was not made out to be that big of a deal. That didn't however, mean that it embarrassed the two boys any less.
Harry felt the blood rise to his face; this was the point where Draco would find out the truth. Or at least part of it. He was shocked though, to find that Draco did not burst out indignantly that he was completely heterosexual. There was an awkward silence and no one spoke. Finally Dumbledore cleared his throat.
"Well, the silence and your blushing tells me that the contact may not always be limited to verbal and platonic." Dumbledore's eyes twinkled in a way that made Harry fidget even more in his seat.
"For now, then," Dumbledore continued, "You will live in the tower together for the remainder of the year, and when summer holidays come, we will come up with a new plan. You may go to class now, I will owl your teachers to let them know why you were tardy. Have a nice morning." Dumbledore smiled warmly as his students stood awkwardly and left.
Harry had transfiguration, while Draco had herbology, and so the two parted ways outside of Dumbledore's office. Harry walked down the corridors to transfiguration and slipped inside, sitting next to Dean and pulling out his quill and parchment. As he began to take notes about the spell they would be using in that class, Dean leaned over to question him.
"Where were you?"
"Talking to Dumbledore."
"Why? About what? Anything to do with Hermione?"
"No. Draco. The linkling shit."
"Oh." With that Dean shut up and hurridly scribbled down his own notes. McGonagall demonstrated the transfiguration twice, changing her pillow into an Iguana, and then back to a pillow. After that, they were on their own to try to change their pillows.
After several times, Harry had a green scaly pillow and Dean had an Iguana that was polka dotted at had a white ruffle down it's back and buttons for eyes. Needless to say, they spend the better part of the class mastering this transfiguration. Harry couldn't figure out why though, he wasn't sure how transforming a pillow to a lizard was ever going to aide him further in his life. Either way, he did it eventually.
That night Harry skipped dinner, opting to go down to the kitchens himself and get a tray. While this was not technically, "allowed", the house elves were always falling over themselves backwards to please anyone they met, so it wasn't ever a problem to get a bit of food.
He ate in the tower, immersed in a book chronically many of the Quidditch stars of the century. The pictures were by far the best part, all in color and zooming around the pages.
He lost track of time and wound up reading, curled up by the fire, until late into the night. He was disturbed however, when Draco came stumbling in, once more. He was drunk again.
"Jesus Malfoy, I'm starting to think you're a bloody alcoholic." He said, half smirking and half smiling. But when he met Draco's eyes, something was different from the last time.
He wasn't giggling, he wasn't falling and laughing; he certainly wasn't confessing attraction to Harry. He just looked sad. Harry frowned, confused by the other boy.
"Are you okay?" he asked somewhat timidly. He stood up, meaning to go help Draco. He reached Draco and half-helped him to the couch where Draco flopped down and Harry returned to his curled up nook in the armchair. "Draco?"
Draco made no attempt at a response, but his eyes reflected a sort of sorrow that can only come from deep inside someone. A pain that wasn't caused by someone else, but by his own emotions, betraying everything he sought to uphold.
"Draco?" he tried again, more pressing this time.
"Oi! Malfoy!" he called loudly. Draco lifted his head at the shout and met Harry's eyes. His gaze was so intense that Harry had to look away. He focused on the flames and Draco finally spoke.
"I have a question, Potter."
"Yeah?"
"Do you have any idea what it's like to want something you can't ever have?"
"I guess, who doesn't know the feeling."
"That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about love. I'm talking about loving someone who won't ever love you back, someone who can't. Because "someone" won't ever get over the past, and look at the new person, not who I used to be."
"Who YOU used to be?" Harry questioned, catching Draco's slip.
"Who a hypothetical person used to be."
"Who did you used to be, Draco?" Harry questioned softly.
"I used to be a horrible person.. I did things I don't even want to think about, let alone speak out loud. I did things I'm so ashamed of. And I would give anything to take some of it back." Draco avoided eye contact, he stared blankly at the carpet, his eyes empty of anything except pain.
"But who are you now?"
"I'm different. I swear. I wouldn't ever do or say or think the same way as I did two years ago. I know now, I know the truth, I know right from wrong. I know dark from light. I know good from evil. I met 'evil'. I saw how it ruins lives. I saw it all. And I'm different now, because of it."
"I know you are." Harry moved to sit on the couch with Draco, though at his respective end.
"NO! No you don't know. You don't know, you say you do, but you don't believe me! I will always be the stupid arrogant death eater in training to you. Well I'm not anymore. I did the training, I did it all, and I regret it more than anything, but it's too late now. And because its too late, you won't ever believe that I'm really a different person."
Harry reached over and rolled Draco's sleeve up. He swallowed his gasp as he saw the dark mark burned into Draco's arm. He touched it lightly with two fingers, and Draco yanked his arm back.
"Don't touch it. It's disgusting. It's revolting, its repulsive, filthy, it's everything I'm not."
"I know."
"No." His voice cracked. "No you don't." A single tear traced a thin trail down his pale cheek. Harry reached up and brushed it aside.
Without thinking, he lowered his lips to Draco's and kissed him gently, his hand stayed up at his face, cradling Draco's cheek in his palm. After several seconds, Harry pulled back and looked at Draco, afraid of what he would see.
But just in his dream, all he saw was no more than lust and desire.
REVIEWWWWW REVIEWWWWW
I would have written more, but im in a pretty shitty mood due to a less than friendly email from my ex boyfriend. Basically saying Im a bitch, that I don't deserve his love, and that he fucking hates me and never wants to speak to me again. This was all in response to me telling him yesterday that we broke up 7 months ago, and I wanted him to leave me alone.
Either way, it's been kinda shaky on my end of the computer.
But that's a chapter.
So review. Make me feel better.
Curlytop: I love nothing more than loooong review that actually tell me something other than "I like the story". Not that I don't like those reviews, I love all of them. But long ones give me a sense of fulfillment, if you will. And for the record, I did come up with the linkling idea all on my very own, and I'm rather pleased with it.
Pirate Bitch Nut: Amusing, as always. Haha. Don't worry, your names weren't THAT bad. Haha I'm j/k. Thanks!
Syn(): Extra thanks, t'was you who named this lovely disaster of a story
Immortal Memories: thanks for the review, thanks for the name ideas.
Fi- thank you! I wouldn't ever call my writing wonderful (I think that's the word you used) but thank you!
GenX-revolution- sorry it's hard for you to understand, lol, everyone else seems to do fine though. If you could tell me what you don't understand about my writing fashion then maybe I can fix it... and for the record when I graduate next may, I'll be 17.
Liza Marie- I stuck the definition of S&M up at the top, well kinda.
Lyonessheart- don't worry I'm fixing all those annoying fake chapters, lol, but thanks for the warning
Nirvana Cheerleader- I've never read that story, but I'd be excited to read another one that's kinda like this, cause I thought I was the only one, so I'm curious how someone else does this general idea of a story. Thanks!
Draco23Luver Karma N0b0dys-ang31 Superstar09 Yana5
Anyone I forgot, which I'm almost sure wasn't very many, seeing as there aren't VERY MANY reviews to start with...
Thanks to you too!!
Top of Form