So Much Different Inside
Cold. I guess that's one word that's commonly associated with me. It doesn't much bug me. I know that I'm a bit heartless. I live with it.
But when you get use to callousness, it's a real shock when you suddenly find the reason you're living.
I don't know why I didn't realize it before. I don't know why I couldn't tell that Katsuya Jonouchi was the person that made me complete. He was the reason that I was becoming… maudlin, I suppose.
For a very long time, I kept everything a secret. On the outside, I was still vicious, still pitiless, and still on top of things. But inside, I was so lost. I didn't know what I was trying to pull off; I thought that, given time, someone would call my bluff.
Hopefully that someone wouldn't be a fan girl.
After a few months of this fruitless toiling, I finally told you.
"What do you want, Seto?" you asked me, and I told you the truth. That I loved you. And, lo and behold, you walked away from me.
So, this pain, this suffering… this is heartache. Something that I've never felt in my entire life, but in my life I've never met someone that I love as much as you.
Maybe Mokuba, but that's just a tiny bit different.
You act completely unaware in class. On the outside, I pretend to think of you as a complete idiot. On the inside, I become happy when you simply smile at the wall or something. These feelings are messing me up, and the feelings show up at the most random times.
So here I am, daydreaming and reminiscing when I should be paying attention to my business associate. I don't think I've ever daydreamed in my life. And I'm trying not to, but I can't.
I guess you really are important to me. At first, I figured it was just some stupid thing - that it'd pass given time.
How much time am I supposed to give, though? You'd think seven months is enough, right?
I'm not really sure of anything anymore – on the inside, that is. On the outside, I'm still the same heartless, vehemently cold Seto Kaiba.
But things are so different inside.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Yugioh.
A/N: Most of the feedback on the other two mini-Yugioh fictions I did was very positive. (Yes, I screwed up; Serenity is Jonouchi's sister, so technically she can't dump him… I thought Serenity was someone else…) So this completes the triangle: Seto Kaiba's POV. Read and review. Domo arigato.