Lessons

by Lethe Seraph



Session One: Whistle While You Work


"Teach him how to wash dishes or something."

In all likelihood, it had been a joke.

However, there was the chance that it wasn't. What was he to do? Croquet followed his master's every command, or else. He prided himself on being a loyal servant to the eccentric bunny-loving artist that was the god of Duel Monsters. He would follow the man to the ends of the earth and back.

That was the thought running through Croquet's mind as he attempted to teach the soulless husk the basics of home cleaning.

He didn't know that it was a soulless husk, of course. Or, rather, he didn't quite believe it. There wasn't such thing as soul-stealing, was there? If there were, it would probably be illegal. And he was convinced that his master, Pegasus, would never do anything illegal.

Kidnapping? What kidnapping? Pegasus had kindly picked the child's grandfather up to stay at his expansive home for an undefined amount of time. His master was a very generous man.

Croquet took the limp hands of Seto Kaiba in his own and pushed them through the suds. "Now pick up the sponge."

Kaiba did nothing.

He was being a very sore loser, thought Croquet. It had been part of his deal with Pegasus, hadn't it? "Pick it up, I say."

Nothing. A very determined sore loser indeed. The look in his eyes was quite disturbing. It was as though he wasn't even paying attention to Croquet. Damn egotistical brat.

Fine. Be that way. He wrapped Kaiba's fingers around the sponge and scrubbed. Had the boy never washed dishes before?

A lilting voice drew him out of his struggles. "Croqueeeet? What are you doing?"

"What you ordered, sir," rasped Croquet. "Mister Kaiba is being very stubborn."

"Hmm. That won't do, now, will it?" said Pegasus. He smiled. "Be a good boy and go get the apron from the cupboard."

"Which one, sir?"

"The one with the ruffles, of course. He'll look just darling."

"Yes, sir." Croquet complied with practiced speed and military form, holding the rose-colored apron as far away from him as possible. His nose was slightly wrinkled.

Pegasus took the apron and lowered the proper loop over Kaiba's head. "Thank you, Croquet. Now help me tie it, there's a good man."

"Yes, sir."

The bright-haired man snapped his fingers, and Kaiba began slowly raising his hands over the sink.

"Don't dilly-dally, Kaiba-boy," drawled Pegasus. He grinned. "Better, Croquet?"

"Yes, sir. Very," said Croquet, amazed. His master really was an impressive man.


Half an hour later, under the expert watch of Master Pegasus, Croquet had finally managed to get Kaiba to complete his chore. He might have been an attractive and intelligent young man, but Seto Kaiba was painfully inept at the fine art of dishwashing. It was a pain to watch.

"I don't mean to sound rude, Master Pegasus, but wouldn't the job have gone quicker if I had just done it myself?" said Croquet.

"Perhaps it would have," said Pegasus in his sing-song tone – either he was enjoying himself or plotting someone's untimely suffering – as he removed Kaiba's apron easily. "It would not, however, have been nearly as much fun. Don't you agree?"

"Erm…" Croquet coughed. He toweled off the last dish and returned it to a tall cabinet. "Yes, sir."

Pegasus assumed an expression of mock shock. "Why, Croquet, don't tell me that you aren't enjoying this."

"I wouldn't say that, sir."

"Think of it this way, Croquet: he's learning valuable things, and being entertaining for the first time in his young career. We are doing Seto Kaiba a great service."

The guard pushed up his sunglasses, contemplating the statement. At length, he decided that Master Pegasus was correct. Somewhere in the depths of Croquet's soul, a small laugh had bubbled up while watching Kaiba clumsily scrub at a china dish. "Yes, sir. Very good, sir. What shall I do next?"

Pegasus smiled wickedly. There was a glint in his eye.

The glint scared Croquet. He had seen it far too many times. To any person who hadn't known Pegasus as long as he had, it would look like the mischievous twinkle of an eccentric millionaire.

To Croquet, it looked like Kaiba was going to wake up with quite a few questions.

…Not that he was asleep or soulless or anything impossible like that.

Pegasus laughed, the 'twinkle' giving it an eerie undertone. "You're going to love this, Croquet…"


Picture a spacious family room, bedecked in crimson velvet and ornate furniture.

Picture a fire, crackling cheerfully within the hearth.

Picture an elegantly dressed man; silver locks tucked behind an ear as he sweeps pale hands across the keyboard of an ebony grand piano. The chords resonate richly around the room.

Picture a military man, sitting stiffly at the other end of the room. He looks as though he is enjoying himself, but doesn't wish to express it. Either that or he had a particularly unhealthy meal the previous evening, and it's only just catching up to him.

Picture a feminine young man, standing in the center of the room and belting out the lyrics to "Schadenfreude".

To their great astonishment, he can actually sing quite a wonderful soprano.