Author's Note: This story is really just a short maybe three chapter humor romance, set BEFORE the movie and before my other OUATIM story, Blood in the Sand. It's unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.
Disclaimer: I don't own Sheldon Jeffrey Sands, he belongs to his respected creators of Once Upon A Time In Mexico I do how ever, own Cerise Stone, Sammy Iokie and Sarah Darcy.
Round One
He tossed paper balls into the waste paper basket near the desk. His feel, in black hiking boots were propped up on the scared wood. He was bored out of his mind. As the second paper ball landed in the basket, he sighed violently, running his hands through his shoulder length hair and leaning his head back, closing his golden brown eyes. On the radio, somewhere in the room, The Doors played Love Her Madly. Sheldon Jeffrey Sands grinned slightly, thinking about his lover, Cerise Stone.
He was contemplating the right color of Cerise's eyes when he felt some one slip down on his lap, not that he needed to open his eyes to know who it was. He could smell the slight rose scent. He wrapped his arm around the body as it leaned forward, wrapping slender arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. He grinned a slightly cocky grin.
Cerise Stone shook her head, her lose red hair swingin with the motion. She looked down at Sands and pushed a lock of nearly black hair back from his tanned face. "What are you doing, Sheldon." Sands didn't open his eyes. "Not a fucking thing." "Well, that's good to know, the CIA is paying you, over time mind you and you're sitting here doing nothing." He opened both eyes, grinning even widered and looked at her. "I can think of a couple things WE could be doing right now." "Not in the office." Cerise said seriously. Sands winked and slipped a hand under her shirt. "Watch it mister!" Cerise yelped, moving on his lap. Sands pulled her to him and kissed her hard.
"Yo, love birds." Sands eased back from the kiss rolling his eyes and looked over Cerise's shoulder at Sammy Iokie. "What, Iokie?" Sands asked bluntly. "Are you two as bored as Sarah and I?" "Depends on your definition of bored." Sands stated. He watched Sarah appear behind Sammy, grinning impishly, "Well, Sarah and I were talking...and we thought we'd interest the two of you in a little game." Sammy stated. Cerise raised an eyebrow. "Game?" "Oh yes.." Sarah nodded eagerly. "What kind of game?" Sands asked.
"Well, it would involve the four of us, and one or two, 24 hour stores."
"Make a little more sense, Sammy." Cerise said, turning on Sands' lap to look at them.
"We're going to play hide and seek in Kroger's or the Super Wal-Marts or something." Sarah said.
"Girls against boys." Sammy added. Sands suddenly laughed, taking his boots off the desk and sitting forward with Cerise. "You're game." Cerise groaned. She had the feeling she was in for a long night.
Sarah parked her car in an open spot, Cerise sit next to her. "Where are they?" "Probably already here." Cerise muttered, looking around the parking lot. But she looked up at the sound of a loud base and watched as a black mustang pulled quickly into the spot infront of them. Sammy and Sands grinned at them from behind the windshield. Sarah and Cerise looked at each other. "Well, let's get this over with." Cerise said softly, getting out of the car, into the late October night. She pulled her jacket tighter and watched as the men got out of Sands' mustang. "All right, here's the rules." Sands said as he and Sammy came over Sarah's car. "The restrooms, both in the front and in the back are neutral." "What's base?" Sarah asked. "Register 15." Sammy replied. "Round one, Wal-Marts, Round two Kroger's." He added.
"This is crazy." Cerise muttered. "We're all crazy." Sands replied, grinning deviously. "The game starts once we hit the inside of the store. Guys find the girls, we'll give you a count of 30 to start out with." He stated all business like. They turned and strolled up the parking lot towards the slidding doors.
At 1 am, there weren't a hell of a lot of people in the large discount department store. Sarah and Cerise looked around as they entered and saw Register 15 in the very middle of the front. "All right girls, one," Sands started counting. "Two, three." Sarah and Cerise looked at eachother and took off. "Fiften, twenty, thirty!" Sands called behind them. "Cheater!" Cerise yelled back, slipping into the card isle. Sarah dodged into one isle a head of her and they came out into the men's clothing department.
"You take the right, I'll head left." Sands told Sammy and they started out at a brisk walk. Sands turned down the same isle Cerise had. Sammy ran past the books and turned into the isle between the mens and women's clothing department, stopping to look for Sands.
Cerise hide under a rack of long coats, feeling foolish. She knew for one, Sands was a very competitive person and wouldn't let the girls win easily. She glanced around for Sarah and saw her sneakers disappear into the sock isle. Sarah was trying to keep from laughing out loud. She'd seen Sammy looking in the women's cloths.
The minutes ticked by for Cerise who swallowed and tried to keep her breathing soft. A moment later, she saw Sands' black hiking boots infront of the rack she was hiding in and covered her mouth. He was no fool. All he had to do was tag her and she'd be out. There was no way. It was no or never.
Sands was looking around the isles closets to him. He couldn't have missed her. He turned and was about to go down one isle when she busted out of a rack of over coats, laughing merrily and sprinting towards the children's department, which would put her one step closer to the back bathrooms. Sands dodged down a side isle intent to cut her off. Cerise yelped and cut into the lingerie section, picking up a package of work socks and throwing them at him. Sands cut to the left and got infront of her.
She stopped at a rack of clearance bra, Sands was infront of her, ready to dodge either way to capture her. He was grinning at her deviously as she searched for a way out. She yelped again and ducked towards the changing room. Sands tripped over some items she'd pulled off the rack to slow him down and was able to grab the jacket she was wearing, which was really his, but she wrestled out of it, sprinting past the changing room, and darting into the baby isles. Sands slowed down, pulling on his jacket, rather then leave it behind.
Cerise sprinted through the home decorating isle and slid into the corridor outside the bathroom, breathing hard. She turned, leaning against the wall, to see Sands standing just in the door way of the little hallway, almost glaring. She laughed, catching her breath and wondered how Sarah was doing.
Sarah breathed hard, crouch in the now closed off Electronic's section. She had to get back to the back bathrooms where she'd seen Cerise run towards, but Sammy was stalking around isle outside the section. Sarah looked around, looking for a distraction and grinned at the stereo system. She crept over to it, and turned it on, slipping towards the back isle of the department.
Sammy heard the radio and ran into the Electronic's department intime to see Sarah skirt out of it. He gave chase, cutting into the children's department, aware of where she was going and as they got closer to the back bathroom's, Sammy yelled out. "Sands, she's getting closer!"
Sands who'd been keeping his attentions on Cerise was mocking himself, turned and saw Sarah. When Sarah saw Sands, she ducked into craft's isle. For a moment, Sands was split in half. On one hand, he couldn't leave Cerise, she'd make a run for it. On the other, Sarah was the slower of the two and if they caught Sarah, they'd be one shorter of a case.
He swore and took off down the isle towards the craft section, seeing Sammy parallel him in the other isle, so they closed in on Sarah. Cerise gave silent thanks to Sarah and took off running, making sure Sands heard her. Sands swore loudly and turned down the isle to see Sarah climb over the cutting table for the material and dodge down a car isle. Sammy met Sands a moment later. "Go after Sarah!" Sands ordered, heading back for the way he'd come.
Sands turned the corner to see Cerise sitting at one of the tables in the little cafe that was now closed. She waved to him and slipped under the table, slipping over to the medium that separated the cafe and the store. Sands came to a stop in the middle of the cafe floor, turning in time to see Cerise duck out into the store again, laughing. She ran towards the food section.
Sarah had slowed to a brisk walk as she wondered down the children's toys. She knew Sammy was behind her, but now she just wanted to play hard to get. It was the prefect chance to sneak in some PDA in Sarah's opinion and she could care less what Sands and Cerise where up to, knowing full well, those two, where still playing the game. Sarah ducked into the gardening section and waited for Sammy.
When he passed an isle, she reached out and grabbed the back of his white tee shirt, yanking him back to her and pushing him up against a display of pumpkin seeds, knocking a few packages down as she kissed his hard. Sammy was taken back a moment but slowly wrapped his arms around Sarah's waist. "This is cheating..." He muttered as he kissed her back. "So.." She mumbled, hands resting on his chest.
Cerise couldn't run any more, she had a stitch in her side from running and laughing and as she leaned up against one of the isle's, cereal, she strained to hear Sands, but there were at least three other people in the other isle's stocking. She had one move to make as that was make a run for register fifteen, it wasn't THAT far for the cereal isle. So she darted out of the isle in time to see Sands come out of the one infront of her. "SHIT!" She screamed, dodging a stack of boxes, but her foot caught and she plummeted to the ground hard. She heard his footsteps slow and a moment later, she looked at the black hicking boots infront of her face. "Oh no you don't!" She stated, pushing away from him.
She managed to dodge into the card isle again and heard Sands swear. He turned and sprinted around the front of the card isle, racing her towards the in, but Cerise came out first, turning in a sharp hair pin turn for Register Fifteen. Sands picked up speed, determined to catch and his arms closed around her waist, just as her hands slammed down on the counter of registered fifteen and her british voice filled the air, "BASE!" They stumbled and he slammed her into the end of the register, which thank god was empty as she went tumbled over it backwards on the to counter, with Sands over top of her.
He looked down at her, grinning impishly, both where breathing hard. "You lose..." She breathed heavily. Sands continued to pin her, catching her lips in his and kissing her passionately. Cerise had just wrapped her arms around his neck when they heard Sarah and Sammy. "Ready for round two?" Cerise grinned deviously and pushed Sands off her, getting to her feet and running for the door. Sarah let out a cry and took off after her. Sands and Sammy exchanged a look and ran after them, getting outside intime to see the girls pile into Sarah's car. Sands pulled his car keys out of his jeans pocket and he and Sammy ran towards his mustang.