Disclaimer: I don't own any thing associated with Blue Heelers and if I did I would have offered Jane Allsop a lot of money to stay and forced her to stay... well not forced her... insisted is the better term i think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I would have solved Grace's murder a lot quicker!!!

Dedication: To all those who begged me to post it especially to Elle... who is a fantastic fic writer so I am nothing in comparison to her!!!! And she threatened me maybe I should call the Mt Thomas Police... they will save me!!! Then Elle would be jealous could Jo would have saved me and Jonesy given me mouth to mouth

And for Steff who posted it on

And to the reviewers who I think are crazy because this fic is sooooooooo crappy.

Title: Forgive and Forget

Summary: I would give you one but it would give it away

Here goes...

FORGIVE AND FORGET 2

I lay awake in our ever so cold bed. I miss her sweet, warm and gentle touch. I miss her warm body lying next to mine. I miss waking up in the middle of the night and watching her sleep. Watching her take her every breath.

I long to hold her in my arms again, taking in her sweet scent. I long to hear her laugh and to see her sweet innocent smile.

But then again I do not blame her for leaving. I pushed her further and further away. For her leaving I understand. That was my punishment. I did the unthinkable and I deserved it. But what we both did not deserve was what happened. She was taken. Taken from the earth.

I thought we could work through our problems. I thought we both just needed some time to cool off. The next day at work was unbearable. I felt guilty for hurting her. I hid in my office weeping to myself for hurting her. But my heart broke when I saw how miserable she was. Our friends, colleagues blamed me for her sadness and I agreed. It was my fault. I got hold of the news that she wanted a transfer. I could not blame her. After all, I would have done the same thing.

When I confronted her at the pub that night, she said she had reassessed her life goals and she did not need Mt Thomas anymore. She did not need me anymore.

The two days she was initially gone for, I had reassessed my life goals. I soon realised that what I said earlier in the week in my office was what I truly wanted. I wanted to be with her forever. Raising our babies, Emily Georgia and Patrick Joseph. I did not want to live another moment without her. So that day, the day I saw her so miserable, I started to hatch a plan. Something that showed her how much I needed and loved her.

I had not slept a wink since she left, so I started straight away. I got out my keys and opened the locked boxed that I kept in our wardrobe. I still can not believe how I managed to keep Jo's prying eyes from discovering the box.

Inside the box was everything that was important to me. Pictures of family. My father, my mother, my sisters. Pictures of Maggie. But most of the box was full of Jo. Pictures upon pictures of her. Pictures of us. Little letters she liked to write to me and put around the house and my desk for me to discover.

The next afternoon is the time I will never forget. We had been called back to the Baxter's to implement our warrant. Jo stayed back as she was designated watch housekeeper. She wanted to come but she could not. I missed her accompanying me on cases. I loved how she stood up for the innocent and would not go down without a fight. I saw the investigative side of her and watched her flourished in the time we had worked together.

After leaving the Baxter's, without any clues or evidence, the radio delivered the most unimaginable. Mt Thomas Police Station had being destroyed by a blast and demolished by the fire that followed. My heart sank as I realised Jo was still at the station. Tears soon followed and I reacted by pushing the accelerator as hard as I could. When I pulled up to the station I saw it being engulfed in flames. "Jooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!" is all I remember saying, rather yelling.

In the days that have followed I have barely slept, hoping to wake up and realise it was all just a dream. But as the minutes kick over I realise its not a dream.

As I sit in our bed I hug her pillow. The tears freely flow down pass my cheeks and fall to the pillow. Her scent still remained and it felt like she was still there. As I continue to sit there, I flick through the album I started to make. The album that was part of my plan to show her how much I needed her. The album contained the pictures and letters I had kept hold of. Now I also had her name badge. As I read her name, and caress the badge with my thumb, tears continue to flow. It seemed unfair that Clancy had managed to escape and return to Leonie his wife. At least someone was happy out of all this mess.

It had been a week since the bomb that took my Joey, my soul mate, and my best friend I returned to work looking a complete mess. I had not shaved and I had barely slept. I could not concentrate on my work and found myself scribbling Jo's name over and over again. I continually wrote I love Joanna Parrish over and over until the page was darkened in pen.

A month had passed and I was running on autopilot. I was getting warnings from Rusty that I was slipping and that if I had continued I would find myself demoted. Days later he told me that a Detective Senior Constable was to be sent to help me with the workload.

The identity of the new detective was very hush hush. All that I knew was that she was a she and that this was her first post as a Detective. I hoped it was Jo, but I knew that was impossible. It should be Jo the new Detective as she was the best there was and how much I longed for her to return and for us to work side by side again.

On a quiet Thursday morning I arrived to work to find someone with brown hair standing in my office.
"Excuse Me," I said

"Sorry I am...."

Then she turned around then my mouth dropped

who is she???? I wonder!
Well here is chapter two of my crappy fic... more can come but I must warn you they are not good... funny I have not even wrote them yet.

There could be more... I will leave that to you!!!

Jane W