This short I wrote the night after the s9 episode where Lucas leaves Elizabeth a letter before he goes up to the ridge. She never opens it, but this is what I imagined Lucas wrote.

The Letter

Lucas

"Gustave, I am on my way. Thank you again for taking care of things here while I am gone. Would you please give this letter to Elizabeth when she comes by?"
"Oui. Shall I tell her where you are going?"
"The letter explains everything."
"Mon cousin, is everything OK?"
"Yes, everything is fine and I will see you in a few days."

Hope Valley Oct 4, 1919

My Dearest Elizabeth,

I am heading up to the ridge by horseback and plan to camp there for a few days. Please don't worry about me or think there is any problem with us. Quite the contrary, I love you beyond measure but want to be the man that you deserve. I admit to getting a little lost of late. I have long been the self-assured, confident man that you have known for these past few years. But the events of these last several weeks shook my confidence and made me ashamed of showing weakness.I just need a few days to reflect and work off my brood. I can see that even Jack is sensing my mood and has been extra sweet and loving. And while I would eventually work things out there in Hope Valley, especially with your love and support, I thought that I could work through some of my thoughts with more focus away from the inevitable business distractions in town.

I hope you will forgive the timing. I tell you that I love you and then you find me gone, but I will explain that the timing has purpose.I have dreamt of you for all my adult life, the one that someday I hoped to find. And I came to Hope Valley and there you were, the love of my life. I knew you were The One from the start and the love for you was already there, but it has deepened over time as I waited these past years for your heart. I desire nothing more than to spend all my days loving you and I hope that I will have your love in return. I wanted, no I needed, to tell you out loud before I left. Tender feelings, friendship, loving affection, and passion are a blessing between us, but we both know that words hold power. Before I left, the words I have held inside all these years I could no longer suppress. I wanted you to be able to close your eyes in my absence and think of me and hear my voice telling you, "I love you". And I so wanted to be able to sit up at the ridge and hear your voice telling me too. I have promised myself that the next time I go up there, you will be riding beside me and we will spend the night under the stars and we can whisper the words and send them out into the still night. Or stand at the edge of the ridge and shout them out to the valley below.

I know you have been concerned about my sullen brood. We can talk about it in more detail when I return… after I get it sorted out in my head a bit. You know me so well that I imagine you can guess some of it already. First off, there is my panic that the situation with Wyman Walden put you and Jack in potential danger. I am also a little worried about Jeanette's sudden silence and have asked Bill and Nathan to make some calls and hire an investigator on my behalf if necessary. Reflecting back on the situation with Amos Dixon I was also worried that you might let me go because of my past or present associations. Being in jail and having you support me is something for which I can never thank you enough. Then added to that there is the Jerome Smith and Henry situation that took a toll. I will never forget listening to a distraught Florence passing along the call where she hears about the mine possibly reopening. And I also had an encounter with her on the street that jolted me. Furthermore, with the oil business sold, while I will be obligated to stay for a year in some capacity, I want to begin to plan my future professionally. I admire your passion for your work and hope that I too can find mine. I have some thoughts that I would love to share with you once I get out of this sulk I am in.

I know that one of your concerns is my sense of adventure and the feeling that you and Jack may not be enough. But while you aren't wrong about the adventure, you will always be enough for me. I found my home here in Hope Valley and will always be here if you are. You are my adventure; you are my passion and we belong to one another and together we choose our future. The stories of your childhood make me want a bed full of children and puppies wiggling and wagging. But, I also would like to share my happy memories of my travels with my parents with you and our children. So, when I mentioned Paris and Madrid... I was just thinking about all the possibilities. I would love to go to Paris with you and walk through the book stands along the River Seinne. And stand before the Rose Window in Notre Dame and have lunch in a small Bistro in Mon Marte. Or travel to Madrid and sit outside a cafe in La Plaza Mayor and watch Jack chase the pigeons. And dine in Botin's where people have gone for hundreds of years to feast with family and friends. There is a whole wide world out there for us to enjoy, but it will be to Hope Valley that we will always return.

Elizabeth, you know that I believe strongly in us being soulmates. But I realize I have had this idealistic vision that came to a test of late. I thought of myself as the strong partner that would protect and support my soulmate and our family. You are my dream; in this dream I am happy because I make you happy. I am fulfilled because I help support your dreams. But I was mistaken. Yes, I want those ideals but I realize now that you are my soulmate and that means we share in the support; when one falters the other is there. You have been my rock through these trying weeks and I can never tell you how much that means. And I promise you that I will remember that I don't have to do it all on my own, you are my partner and I will share with you and lean on you as I hope you will on me. Just be a little patient with me, I am doing my best to adapt and grow.

We have so much to talk about when I get back. I miss you and I haven't even left yet. But I must be on my way so I can hurry back to you and Jack. Give my buddy a kiss good night for me each night. Tell him I will be back very soon.

Forever yours,

Lucas

Elizabeth

Gustave hands me a letter that Lucas has left me. I can sense his concern as I ask him if he knows where Lucas has gone. I look at the photo of the three of us taken during Hope Valley Days and smile. Our family. And then I go around the desk and sit in his chair and close my eyes. I can feel him enveloping me with love as I sit and imagine him writing this letter to me. He has a slight smile on his face and that look of love in his eyes. Then I hear him tell me "I love you" in that deep sensuous voice of his. And I press my lips to the seal of the letter. "I love you, Lucas. And I know you will come back to me always." I rise and take his overcoat off the back of his chair and slip into it. I breathe in his scent that has lingered on the collar and put the letter in a pocket and then I head home to begin the wait for his return.