Forgive and Forget 9/?

Disclaimer: Like everything else, I don't own a thing! The only thing I own is debt…and a lot of it too! So if you don't want debt I just suggest you imagine I own them for the time it takes you to read this fic, that way we don't all get caught up in the legal mumbo jumbo. Blue Heelers and the characters that currently appear or have appeared in the show belong to the respective owners. So does the lyrics of "Nobody's Home' who belong to Avril Lavinge. Unlike the owners I have no talent to create such beautiful words, characters and lyrics. I thank the owners for letting me borrow them for a short while

Dedication: Apparently there were some people who "liked" it. Don't understand

As always, I'm still not sure how any one can like this fic. Maybe you are having trouble sleeping and instead of going on expensive pills you read this and fall into a deep slumber. I don't blame you!

Title: Forgive and Forget 9/?

Jo's Point of View 4

As I come to familiar streets, I feel as though I am returning home. This is home. This is where people who I care about live. This is where people who care about me live. Do they still care?

I know quietly stand on the footpath of where I used to live. Memories flood my mind. The smell of roses that line the driveway. The fresh country air. The only sound the songful chirp of the birds. Country peace and serenity. I used to call this home. But I left. Left without looking back. Now I have returned. I want everything back to the way it was.

Life does go in Mt Thomas it would seem. The grass is greener. The trees a little taller. But still the calm, relaxing harmony of nothing. No bother in the world. No worries. No fears. Then my eyes fall upon the door. I focus on the door as I slowly walk to the door. My slow pace turns into a pace then a slight jog as I run closer to the door. I run faster and faster. I want to tell him I am here! That I have returned.

I would understand if he did not want me back. I created a world of deception, a deceitful web of lies.

The door handle is in reach. My heart beats faster and faster. My pulse increases rapidly. I am anxious. All I want is to be in his safe warm arms, where I feel protected and safe. Warm and loved. I knock.

And I knock

And I knock

Well, I couldn't tell you
Why she felt that way
She felt it everyday
And I couldn't help her
I just watched her make
The same mistakes again

What's wrong, What's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems
Don't know where she belongs
Where she belongs

No one seems to be home. I knock louder and louder until my knuckles begin to bruise. No one is here! I cannot help but begin to well up with tears. Sniffs become sobs. As I slide down to the ground.

She wants to go home
But nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside
With no place to go
No place to go
To dry her eyes
Broken inside

Open your eyes
And look outside
Find the reasons why
You've been rejected
And now you can't find
What you've left behind

She wants to go home
But nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside
With no place to go
No place to go
To dry her eyes
Broken inside

Her feelings she hides
Her dreams she can't find
She's losing her mind
She's falling behind
And she can't find her place
She's losing her faith
she's falling from grace
She's all over the place, yeah

She wants to go home
But nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside
With no place to go
No place to go
To dry her eyes
Broken inside

She's lost inside
Lost inside, oh ohhh yeah
She's lost inside
Lost inside, oh ohhh yeah

I cannot take it any longer. I run.

I head to the old Mt Thomas Police Station. As I turn to the corner, I see a burnt out shell that used to be called the Police Station. Now it lays in rubble. Life has stopped there but continues to go on around it. I stare. And I stare. I caused this. Not the bomb itself. But the grief that followed it. Tears flow freely. My emotions run wild. I cannot help but let it all out. I have being keeping it bottled up.

I take in the destruction. Utter ruins. It definitely isn't the Mt Thomas Police Station that it was when I left. When I skipped town. When I last saw it the whole place was engulfed in flames. Flames that danced in the wind. Flames that only meant all was about to be lost. Now remains a dried out old existence of what was a working environment. With the daily influx of irate residents and persons passing by the small country town.

I turn my back to the station I cannot not bare to look at it any longer. It makes the pain seem all to worse. This burnt out building resembles my life. I've destroyed it, and all those associated with it. This is too real. So close to home. I stare at the bench sitting beneath two talk gum trees that are across from the station. There sitting on the bench is a sad solum figure. The figure looks so fragile. So overwhelmed with pain and grief.

Her feelings she hides
Her dreams she can't find
She's losing her mind
She's falling behind
And she can't find her place
She's losing her faith
she's falling from grace
She's all over the place, yeah

She wants to go home
But nobody's home
That's where she lies

Once again I apologise for stage directions, I just had these images in my head bursting to get out, and I hope it kind of helps set the scene that has continuously played over and over in my mind

So ends another chapter!

Signing off,

Jane W