He could smell the fresh paint from the other side of the door. He'd promised Meg he wouldn't go into the room until after the new bed had been delivered and she'd made the bed with one of the new sets of linens. Of course, he hadn't been expecting to get home nearly a day early. He turned the handle and pushed the door open and felt the breeze from the windows that were left open to ventilate the room and help speed the paint drying process. He stepped into his bedroom and looked around. The furniture had been moved away from the walls and were covered in plastic sheeting. Except the bed. The bed was already gone. He could feel tears sting his eyes at seeing the empty alcove where his bed - their bed - had been. It brought yet another stab of finality about losing Jimmy, and he felt stupid about the wave of sentimentality that hit him over a bed. A damn bed.
He flipped the plastic sheeting off a couple dressers and pulled out sweatpants, a t-shirt, and clean underwear from their respective drawers, deciding to forgo socks. He paused when he found the pillows from his bed stacked on a dresser. He glanced towards the door like a guilty child or thief, and grabbed one of the four, knowing instinctively it was Jimmy's, and hugged it to himself. In his head, he knew it no longer smelled of his husband, the simple passage of time had dulled the scent, and two and half years of children cuddling in bed had further erased any traces of Jimmy, but his heart still wasn't ready to let go completely and he imagined he could smell his husband.
He took the pillow to the closet and set it on a shelf. Then he grabbed a pair of Crocs and headed into the bathroom for a proper shower and fresh clothes. His heart ached more than his shoulder.
He dropped the keys to the RV into the bowl by the door, juggling the last of the items he was taking out of the camper now that he was home, and headed upstairs to his bedroom after dumping the items in his arms on the kitchen table. Being home on a summer Sunday was already throwing him off, and he knew it would carry over into the rest of the week. He'd messaged Benny before leaving Kenosha, so tomorrow would be a full day of work, and with next weekend being a long one at the faire and the closing weekend, he knew he had to make sure he'd have plenty of stock for whatever might come. He'd also messaged Sam to let him know he'd be home early and had accepted his brother's invitation to dinner, which he was now regretting. He sighed as he pulled clothes from drawers and tossed them onto the bed, then stripped and headed into the bathroom for a hot shower under high pressure.
The bathroom filled with an intoxicating mix of citrus and sandalwood as he lathered himself up with a bar soap, and his skin glistened as the soap washed away. Shower done, he toweled off, got dressed, and trotted down the stairs. He fished the key to the Impala out of the bowl, and headed out to his brother's house.
He detoured to Upper Crust Bakery and picked up a blueberry pie, waving to the owner, Garth, as he headed back out. He sat in the Impala before pulling out, staring at nothing in particular, still feeling out of sorts. Maybe it really was being home on a Sunday night. Or maybe it was the impending closure of Bristol and then the upcoming trip to Lexington. And then whatever comes after. He'd been putting off his talk with Sam, Eileen, Benny, and Bobby about the various possibilities of whatever comes after. And putting off the discussion with Cas.
With a sigh, he turned the key in the ignition and the Impala rumbled to life.
Dean grinned and traded the blueberry pie for his niece after Sam opened the front door.
"Halló, litli fugl," Dean said softly, as he kissed the top of his niece's head.
In response, Mary grabbed a braid that was in easy reach and pulled.
"Owowowowowow," Dean chanted, prying the tiny human's fingers open and removing his hair from her grasp. He pushed his hair out of Mary's reach and sat on the couch, with her on his lap.
"I wanted to talk to you two about something," Dean said, looking at Eileen and Sam. His hands were busy entertaining Mary, so he couldn't sign. "This coming weekend is three days, and it closes out Bristol."
"Any idea how you did, businesswise?" Eileen signed.
"A cursory look at things, and the business did really well," Dean said with a smile. "And online orders stayed steady. I'm actually in the middle of a consultation for a full hauberk for a SCAdian*. But, the weekend after that, I've been invited out to Lexington, to visit Castiel and his family on their horse farm."
He glanced at Sam and Eileen, waiting for the ridicule or concern and was surprised to see Sam lean over, fish his wallet out of his back pocket, and smack a five dollar bill into his wife's outstretched palm. Dean looked between his brother and sister-in-law, both of whom were grinning. Well, Eileen wore a self-satisfied smirk.
"You're betting on my lo - sex life?" Dean corrected. He scowled at his brother. "And you bet against me?"
Sam shrugged and didn't even fake looking embarrassed. Mary started fussing, and Eileen stood to get her squirming daughter. When she turned to go back to her chair, she discreetly lifted the bottom of her shirt, and Mary latched on to nurse. Eileen got comfortable in her chair and Mary promptly stuck a foot under her mother's chin. Sam handed Eileen the nursing pillow, so she could breastfeed hands-free and be able to talk.
"So you really think this is going somewhere?" Eileen asked.
"I think so," Dean both signed and spoke. "The thing is - and I haven't talked to Castiel yet - but honestly, if I wanna make a real effort at a relationship with him, I'm gonna have to move to Lexington."
Once again, he cast a worried look at Sam and Eileen.
"We kinda figured that," Sam finally said and signed.
"What'll most likely happen," Dean explained, "is I'll find a property to rent in Lexington that has room for a forge, and rent equipment."
"And what about your place?" Sam asked.
"Benny said Andrea's been making noise about wanting to finally get married and start a family," Dean said and signed. "And there's no way she'd be willing to raise a family in Benny's trailer. So I could rent out my house to them and Benny gets to work at the forge already on the property."
"What kind of timeline are you looking at?" Eileen signed.
"Well, if all goes well with visits, I dunno, maybe move just before Winter Solstice and the beginning of Yule?" Dean said.
Eileen's phone flashed and she shut it, unlatching Mary and pulling her shirt down. The baby was in a milk coma and Sam took her from Eileen, laying her down in the nearby pack-n-play so Eileen could head into the kitchen. Dean followed his sister-in-law to help bring things out to the dining room for dinner.
The food smells delicious, Dean signed before taking the bowl of salad and a casserole dish with cubed salmon mixed in a mushroom and lemon fettuccine alfredo into the dining room. Eileen followed him with a basket of garlic knots fresh out of the oven. Sam came in with butter and several bottles of pale ale.
"Thank you, Dean," Eileen said with a smile. The three sat at the table and filled their plates.
"So you're not mad at me about considering moving nearly a thousand miles away?" Dean asked after several bites of food. He poured ale into a glass and had a swallow of the cold brew.
"Dude, I haven't seen you this happily stressed out about someone in years," Sam said and signed. "I'll miss you - we'll miss you, but we'll rack up frequent flier miles with weekend and holiday visits."
"Cas mentioned a few times the farm has a couple'a Cessnas," Dean said, draining his glass. Eileen's eyes got wide and Sam looked impressed.
"Maybe we'll open a couple dispensaries in Kentucky** and we'll get a Cessna of our own," Sam mused.
"You've created a monster," Eileen said.
"With me raising him, it was bound to happen," Dean replied with a grin.
"Hey, I resemble that remark!" Sam interjected with a pout and then began laughing. Dean and Eileen joined in and the meal passed with further pleasant conversation.
When the pie and decaf were being served, the conversation circled back around to Lexington and a possible move.
"Have you and Castiel discussed your expectations once Bristol is over?" Eileen asked Dean.
"I had planned on talking to him this weekend,"" Dean replied. "But it was cut short by the weather. And yesterday, Cas spent a good part of the day stoned."
Sam arched an eyebrow. "Why?"
"There was an accident during a joust," Dean signed with a sigh. "His T-W-A-T-W-A-F-F-L-E of a brother tried riding him down once he'd been unhorsed. Cas jumped out of the way, but injured his shoulder."
Eileen tilted her head, mouthing the word Dean had spelled out. Sam just looked confused and he looked to his wife. Eileen started laughing and shook her head. "What the hell is a twatwaffle?" she asked.
"Same thing as a D-O-U-C-H-E-N-O-Z-Z-L-E," Dean clarified. "Both words mean a contemptible person."
Sam rolled his eyes and shook his head. Eileen laughed and Dean finished his pie and decaf. He covered his mouth with the back of a hand as he yawned. "I hate to eat and run-"
"No, you don't," Sam interrupted.
"Bitch," Dean retorted.
"Jerk," Sam said.
"Enough, both of you," Eileen said, rolling her eyes. "Thank you for coming, Dean, and for giving us at least a head's up about what your plans for the future might be."
"I'm going to talk to Bobby on Tuesday," Dean said.
"You know, you could just call Castiel and have this conversation sooner rather than later," Eileen pointed out.
Sam laughed. "Sweetheart, this is Dean we're talking about. You should know by now that later or never are his preferred timelines for heart to heart discussions."
"Bitch."
"Jerk."
Dean stood, motioning for his brother and sister-in-law to stay seated. "The meal was delicious and thank you for being supportive. It really means a lot. I'll see myself out. Give Mary a kiss from me."
Sam stood anyway, and walked his brother to the door. "All joking aside, I'm really proud of you, dude."
"What do you mean?" Dean asked.
"You're going after your happiness, man," Sam said with a smile. "You're willing to make a huge change in your life to get that happiness. Not everyone would be that brave."
"Or I'm doing the most monumentally dumbass thing in my life," Dean deflected, clearly uncomfortable with the praise.
"That haircut is the most monumentally dumbass thing you've done in your life," Sam shot back with a grin. He waved his brother out the door, Dean got into his car, and headed home.
Castiel hung up the phone and sat back in his chair with a smile. Alfie and Oren grinned back.
"Well, that's done, boys," Castiel said. "We'll get the stalls ready in the small barn for now, and slowly introduce the new stallion and the mares to the rest of the horses once they've settled in. They'll be here in two and half weeks, so we've got a lot of work to do."
"Are you upset the board didn't go with getting the colt and fillies?" Alfie asked as he made some notes on his tablet.
"A little," Castiel admitted. "But I understand their point. They want horses that can be show-ready in a year or so, not in three or four years."
"I know they have registry names," Oren said, looking over his own tablet, "but what are their everyday and show names going to be?"
"Odin, Frigg, and Frejya," Castiel answered. Alfie grinned and added that on whatever he'd been writing on his tablet.
"I wonder what the inspiration was for those names," Alfie asked, barely hiding his smirk.
"And just what do you all think you're doing?" a woman's voice spoke up.
Alfie and Oren turned and jumped out of their chairs, racing past Meg and out of Castiel's office. Castiel watched the two younger men run in fear and turned his attention to Meg.
"You like terrorizing them way too much," Castiel said, shaking his head. "They're good kids."
"I know that, Clarence," Meg said as she took Alfie's vacated seat. "What I don't know is why you're in your office working this late, and while you're injured."
"I can do office work with my bruised shoulder," Castiel said, fiddling with a pen. "And I got an email from the farm that's selling the Friesians that we've reached a deal, and I wanted to get back to them."
He stood and shut off his computer. "Now, we can go to dinner at Amara's, she can fuss over my injury, I can hug and kiss my kids, and try not to kill Lucien. Oh, and I'll need help making up the bed in the guest room in my house. I can't do it with this shoulder."
Notes:
Halló, litli fugl - Hello, little bird (the word fugl sounds basically like fultsh, similar to engill being pronounced eng-tltsh, made by pressing your tongue against your teeth and exhaling for the proper sound)
* SCA - Society for Creative Anachronism, a worldwide medieval reenactment group. A SCAdian is what we call ourselves.
** Yes, I know all marijuana is illegal in Kentucky at the time of this writing. But this is my 'verse, and I say it's legal.