Ch. 17

Lucas hadn't been able to find the right woman. It seemed as if numerous women enter his life, but none were able to capture his attention for long. All of them lacked certain characteristics he was looking for. What they were, he didn't know. Always hopeful, he thought he would eventually find the person he wanted to share his life with. A home. A family. Those were the only voids in his life. That was until now. He never thought that the person who was a perfect match for him would be passionately against the idea of them being together.

Passion. Haley definitely possessed heated passion. The explosive kisses he shared with her were both gentle and intense, matching the ones in his dream. He wanted to taste her lips again, but knew she would refuse even if she desperately desired to do so. Her stubbornness was her defense mechanism, his obstacle. Lucas didn't understand why she wouldn't want a relationship. He understood her hesitancy in view of the fact that he was her employer, but he sensed something more was driving her away from him. Determined to find out, he set a goal to figure it out as soon as possible.

He started by convincing Haley to drive both of them to Denny's before going to her place. They needed their strength if they wanted to work throughout the day redoing their presentation. Overcome by hunger, Haley relented. It'd been weeks since she'd ate French toast covered with powdered sugar and drenched in sweet maple syrup.

When they arrived in front of her apartment, she unlocked the front door. Before entering, she suddenly stopped and said over her shoulders, "Just so you know, this place is extremely quaint and it's such a mess."

"Don't worry about it. I'm not one to judge," adjusting the strap of the duffle bag on his shoulder, he continued, "Besides, I like quaint, intimate places."

Scanning the apartment, he teased, "It looks like a tornado swept through the inside of your house."

"Ha ha very funny," Haley remarked, not wanting to leave Lucas with any hopes of them being friends or...

"All kidding aside, this is a nice place you have here."

Shrugging, she just pointed to an area next to the wall. "You can put your bag there. I'm going to the get my laptop. Go ahead and help yourself to a drink in the refrigerator."

Lucas walked to the kitchen, grabbed two cups from the cabinets and placed them on the counter. Before opening the refrigerator, he walked through the living room and through the hallway. Seeing an open door, he knocked lightly, making his presence known.

Turning around from her seat on the floor, she hastily pushed something under the bed. Wondering what that was but not wanting to give the impression that he was nosy, Lucas decided to not ask about what she seemed to be hiding from him, not that she would hide anything but her feelings. "Do you want something to drink?" His eyes swept the room, taking in the rich blue walls and beautiful paintings. A bookshelf was in the far corner, filled with a large variety of books, many he recognized and others he'd heard about.

"Water would be great." Lucas nodded, making Haley uncomfortable that he was still in the room. "Do you mind getting me some now while I change? I feel filthy wearing the same outfit two days in a row."

"Oh, right. Sorry." He stumbled out, escaping as if he was a child caught seeing something he wasn't suppose to.

Closing the door behind him, he headed to the kitchen. As he was getting his drinks, he couldn't help but think that Haley was trying to conceal an object from him. What could it have been? She informed him that he needed to change. Feeling the heat rise to his face, he realized that she was probably holding a piece of undergarment and accidentally dropped it on the ground. It would have been embarrassing to have someone barge in and see you holding your unmentionables, but it wasn't like he hadn't seen them already...

While Lucas was retrieving the drinks, Haley walked to the door and closed it. Her pulse was racing and she could feel her entire body almost shake. She was so worried that Lucas might have walked into the room and notice the very thing that would reveal her true identity that she tried to hide it. The one she'd been conceal from him since the day she walked back into his life or more correctly, the day he reentered into hers. Treading slowly towards the bed, she crouched to the floor. Her hands made contact with the item in question. The gold emblem of Tree Hill High School on the yearbook gleamed brightly in the sunlight entering the window. Briefly tracing the letters with a finger, she thought about what the yearbook held – evidence of their past forever captured in a horrible senior picture of her and a handsome photograph of the star Raven basketball player. The guilt gnawing at her conscience made it unbearable to look at the pictures so she slipped it back underneath the bed, a place where Lucas wouldn't dare to look. Then she quickly changed into another ensemble.

Keeping a firm grasp on the laptop and the notes, she placed both on the coffee table and plugged in the cord for the laptop. Lucas handed her the water watching her take a sip of it while he drank his 7-Up. Without skipping a beat, recreated the same slideshows making some minor changes. Feeling left off of his own project, Lucas sat back watching Haley in earnest until he couldn't stand sitting there, not helping. He wasn't the type to sit around while others did the work.

When Haley released the mouse, Lucas reached for it. "If you don't mind, I would like to contribute to the presentation. I don't want you to have to do all the work."

Not taking her eyes off the screen, she answered, "That's nice of you to be concerned but you don't have to be. We both contributed to equally. I thought that since we practically finished it already, all we have to do is recreate the slideshow with some changes. It'll be easier if I just do the computer work."

"Don't you mean faster?" The anguish in his sorrowful eyes was evident. "That's why you're working like a madman. Do you think I'm so naïve that I don't know what you're doing?"

"It's not," Haley began only to be cut off, "Then what is it? God James, I don't know what to do here." Tightly clenching his hands, he invited the sharp pain. "You're killing me with your act of indifference when I know that I have an effect on you - that you have an effect on me. Don't deny it."

"Look, I...we're not going to get into this again. I thought I made myself clear earlier. We were doing perfectly fine since I told you my decision."

"You must really be doing a number on yourself if you were able to make yourself believe that."

Exasperated, she grumbled, "When are you going to believe me when I say I have no feelings for you? What can I do to prove it to you?"

"Kiss me." His face was set in a serious tone.

Horrified that her body wouldn't react the way her mind would want it to, she gasped, "What?" There was no way in Hell that she would let his succulent lips touch hers again.

"If you have no feelings for me, then it's just two pairs of lips touching. If you kiss me and I sense that you have no feelings for me, then I'll leave you alone."

"And what if I don't want to?"

"You don't know what you want."