Ch. 28

The music was piercing as it was comforting. The vociferous sound made it difficult to even hear herself think; something she didn't want to do anyway. She already knew flashes of the stranger she had become acquainted with all of five minutes cozying up with Lucas would imprison her thoughts. Truth hurt. It hurt badly. Especially when she realized the girl had been telling the truth. She is Lucas's fiancée. But there was something that hurt more: lies.

Music was like a place she could just lock herself in and hide for a while, something she could lose herself in. A whirlwind of emotions: hurt, anger, and pent up emotion, but today it evaded her hollow. It was as if the radio stations were taunting her. No matter what station she changed it to, all of them seem to be melodic tunes of broken hearts and sappy love songs she knew all to well. It was telling her she didn't posses what it took to make that type of love last. Maybe she never had it.

A red stoplight. A finality. It was her permission and she took it, slouching over as her head rested on the steering wheel in defeat. She felt like she was breaking while everything faded into the background. Only one person came to mind who could actually comfort her and that was her best friend who happened to be halfway around the world.

It was moments like these that defined her life. The moment of truth when she can't pretend or run anymore. When she realized all she had was herself and she desperately wished there was someone else.

Someone to wrap his or her arms around her.

Someone to hold her and let her cry until everything felt better.

Someone to softly tell her comforting things that made her laugh, proving to herself that she could be happy again and that she could get through this.

Someone to know exactly when words were needed and when silence was what words couldn't convey.

Someone who would know the song in her heart that she had forgotten.

The obnoxious honking sound from behind shook her out of her daze as she pulled off to the side of the road. She was in no condition to drive but she didn't want to call a cab either. Turning off her engine, she took several deep breaths before turning to see a tear-streaked person staring back at her in the rear view mirror. Blinking back the tears that continued to flow down her soaked face, she questioned the predictions people had about her future as she grew up. They always said that the male population would realize that she was a great person and boys would have to fight to seek her love. Although she didn't want to get her hopes up that one day she'd find her prince for fear of utter disappointment, she couldn't help but wish they were right. The good guys always seem to want the bad girls and that was something she wasn't and would never compromise herself to be. At the same time, she often wished that her conscience would allow her to reinvent herself. It seemed as if men date the bad girls until they wanted to settle down and raise a family. This was when they would go for the "good girls." This wasn't fair Haley thought. Good girls were doomed and basically punished for being good. Maybe this wasn't the case and she couldn't be farther from the truth. Haley questioned if there was something wrong with her. She was always used and abuse (figuratively speaking of course). Although she should have been use to this by now, it wasn't something someone could quite get use to. Rubbing her temples furiously, trying to sort her jumble thoughts she repressed for years until they exploded at the most inopportune time, she searched for some Advil in her purse.

---

Slinging the black duffel bag over his shoulders, Lucas stepped out of the cab. Mumbling an incoherent thank you, he gazed at the sign in from of him before walking inside.

"Where can I get a decent cup of coffee around here?" he asked the waitress.

Lifting her head up from cleaning a table, she ran towards him, throwing her arms around Lucas. "Hey stranger. What brings you to this boring town?"

"My horrendous mother who has been harassing me for months to come visit her."

Playfully punching him in the stomach, she remarked, "I feel sorry for your mother. She has to put up with a good-for-nothing son like you."

"Hey, I resent that!"

Laughing, she shakes her head. "Well that's what you get for making a mean statement about me."

"It was a joke. You know you're an okay mother."

Raising her eyebrows and throwing a death glare at him, she waved her fingers at him. "Watch out Luke. You may be in your twenties, but I can still ground your sorry butt."

"Okay, okay." Raising his hands in surrender, he admitted his defeat. "I'm sorry."

"That's more like it. Now tell me what's wrong," she said in a mother knows tone.

"What makes you think something's wrong?"

"The fact that you flew here without telling me. Besides, I haven't seen you for three long months and all of a sudden you're at the café claiming that everything's fine and dandy when I know better. Something's wrong. You might as well tell me now because I'm going to figure it out eventually."

When Lucas didn't answer, she asked, "So who is she?"

"Who?"

"Don't play dumb. The girl you're pining for?"

Not surprised that she knew what was wrong, he signed dejectedly. "An incredible, amazing woman. She was everything I hoped for in a partner and more. I had to literally pinch myself to make sure she wasn't a dream mom."

"What happened with this girl?"

"That's the thing. She's not the perfect person I thought she was."

"Luke, no one's perfect."

"I know but she betrayed me." Karen watched her son pace back and forth while he described this woman that clearly affected him. "She lied to me and played me for a fool. I thought something about her was vaguely familiar, but she told me that I was mistaken. There were so many times where I thought she was hiding something from me, but never in my wildest dreams did I think it was this."

"Honey, you're all worked up. How do you know she betrayed you? Maybe you're jumping to the wrong conclusions."

Flashback

Pounding urgently on the door, Lucas was disappointed and confused when a petite brunette opened the door.

"I'm sorry, I thought this was someone else's apartment."

Wondering why the stranger stared at him intently, he was about to leave before she stated, "Lucas? Lucas Scott?"

"Yes. How do you know me?"

"I'm Isabella, Haley's best friend. Haley and I went to Tree Hill with you. You were the all star basketball player if I'm not mistaken. Wait, didn't you know?"

"Do you know where Haley is?" Lucas didn't bother to answer the question after he began putting the pieces together. All the incidents where he thought Haley slipped by saying things he thought he never told her and times when he felt like she was hiding something from him was adding up. Finally putting the pieces together, he held back his anger from this semi-stranger.

"Unfortunately I don't. I have a spare key to this apartment and I thought I would spend my one-week vacation time by surprising Haley with a visit. I guess it wasn't such a great idea. I think she went on a vacation herself because some of her clothes are gone."

"Okay. Thanks."

"Do you want me to tell her you stopped by if I see her before I leave?"

"No thank you," he replied with slumped shoulders and sorrow filled eyes.

"But you seemed like you had something urgent to tell her."

"I did, but I just realized that it wasn't important."

Before Isabella could ask Lucas how Haley and Lucas met, he was gone.

"She must have had a valid reason for it," Karen reasoned after Lucas explained his run in with Isabella.

"I highly doubt that. If you care about someone, you do not lie to them. Our whole Goddamn relationship was based on a lie. Solid relationships deteriorate because of smaller problems. I do not want to be in a relationship with a person who is a fraud."

"Yes, you hate the fact that you still love her."

"Love doesn't exist. I thought it did once but now I think it's a delusion."

"You can't say that," her soothing voice failing to decrease her son's turmoil.

"Why the HELL not?" Pounding his fist on the table, he welcomed the throbbing sensation.

Realizing that he spoke out of anger, she allowed him to vent his anger toward her.

"Because a life without love is meaningless. You can be the richest man in the world with millions of people surrounding you, but you'll feel empty if you have no one to share it with."

---

Haley hadn't realized the light had turned green as she stared at the glaring light that taunted her to continue her journey. She pressed her feet on the pedal and continued driving. Along the way, she passed a sign that said, "Welcome to Tree Hill."