Detective Neal and the Case of his Missing, Unnamed Daughter

Summary:

Oh no! Neal and Yuki have gathered all of their closest friends and family at Queenscove, guests at their daughter's naming ceremony. But lo and behold; their daughter is missing! Who will solve the case? Neal will surely!

Disclaimer:

Yada yada. I am not Tamora Pierce. Therefore, I do not own any of the characters. Heck, I don't even thin I own the plot!S to cope with….

A loud, resounding, girlish shriek bounded throughout the corridors of Queenscove, much to the dismay and amusement of those seated in Queenscove's Great Hall. These said guests were on the verge of completing their last dinner course. A very red, very angry Sir Meathead soon came stomping towards them.

For several hours no one, including Neal's wife, Yuki, could make any sense of what he was saying. So, after several minutes (actually, it was more like 20 seconds), everyone gave up on Neal and let him Huff and Puff most of his anger away. Exactly 7 hours later, this is somewhat how the conversation went.

"YOU!" Neal screeched, pointing at Alanna. "YOU STOLE MY DAUGHTER!!!"

Neal, of course, being the Meathead he was, did not choose the right person to start accusing, and he most definitely did not have any tact.

"I DID NOT!!!!!" Alanna pulled out her very shiny, very sharp sword, and began chasing after Neal, effectively killing her former squire. Or, she would have, if George had not stopped her from jumping Neal.

"He heh he, sorry 'bout that……..YOU STOLE MY DAUGHTER!!!"

"Neal……I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND! I am ABOUT TO HAVE A BABY! Good Goddess, why do you think I WOULD STEAL YOUR DAUGHTER!!!" Kel all but roared, very Lioness-like, and jumped up as best as a pregnant lady would be expected to, and "accidentally" ran Neal through with her glaive. Or she would have, if she was not pregnant, so she would not harm Dom's little son.

"Sorry Kel. Have to be careful, you know. Hey, YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STOLE MY DAUGHTER!!!"

Neal, Dearest….I'm your wife.

"SO!?"

After our dearest Yuki gave our adorable Meathead a death-threatening glare, Neal made a mental note to update his Will, and was more then convinced that Yuki was not the one who stole their daughter.

Surveying his assembled guests, Neal decided to come up with the most brilliant plan in the whole history of Queenscove. What he came up with was…

"YOU?! YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF FINDING MY ONLY POOR, MISSING, UNNAMED DAUGHTER?!?!?!?!?!?"

After giving a Hysterical Yuki a calming drink, and assuring Neal that Yuki had utmost faith in Neal, and that she knew that Neal would find their Poor Unnamed Daughter ("Meathead, Meathead…..of COURSE Yuki wants you to look for your Poor, Unnamed, Missing daughter"), He left a Hysterical Yuki in the hands of his best friend, and marched off to concoct the most brilliant plan in the whole history of Queenscove.

A plan that was bound to shock everyone stiff.

Or, so he hoped.

A/N:

I know (….Really, Really Bad Humor. REALLY bad.

Oh well. shrugs

Needed to get this out of my system.

Do me a favor, and review? Please? pulls on a pitiful look

I don't even care if you flame. Really.