THE REASON - Part Five: Could It Be A Mistake?
Summary: Kimberly had just gotten into Reefside, being a first-time visitor to the city. She's beginning to have second thoughts about confronting her old boyfriend, seeking counsel from Jason about the matter, who tends to have some future plans about a little ranger reunion.
Disclaimer: Power Rangers belongs and will always belong to Saban Entertainment, BVS Entertainment Inc., Renaissance Atlantic Entertainment, Village Roadshow KP Producations Limited, ABC Kids, ABC Family and Disney. And to all other affiliates with the Power Rangers concept (ie. Sentai–the original Power Rangers). And, yes, before I forget, the main title of the story does tie in with Hoobastank's "The Reason".
A/N: Yes. It is official. Kim is in town and in search for Tommy. This is just a little friendly conversation with her "older" brother, Jason. But with an added twist or so. Guess, we'll have to see what happens, now won't we? Sorry, facts will never be straight, so I'm sorry. Going back to the past is way too long ago. I was only six when Power Rangers was released in the US.
"Could it be a mistake to right a wrong that really can't be fixed, when another doesn't see eye to eye with you, anymore?" –Eclyptyk Neo
Kimberly pulled into a local gas station, sitting back in the driver's seat a little frustrated. As the years went by, so did her capability to maintain such an energetic lifestyle. She was constantly on hand and foot training the U.S. gymnastics team for the Summer Olympics in Athens. It was the golden opportunity she had been waiting for–to compete–but was stuck being a trainer for the team. A hamstring sprain put her out of commission for the spot on the U.S. gymnastics team, but the staff still wanted her to stay on and train the team.
And she always wanted to go the Greece. So, the opportunity couldn't get passed up.
But nor could the reason that brought her here to Reefside, CA. She needed to console and confront one final person before she was off for Athens. She had kept in close contact with the old ranger crew. All except one. All except the one she clung so close to her heart. Tommy Oliver.
Her body shook with fear at the thought of his name. She had been thinking about him every single moment after Trini's funeral. She saw the distance between them. And she didn't like that. She wanted to make amends. She wanted to make sure that things were okay between the two of them. She wanted so badly to put him back in her life. If not as lovers now, but as friends. She heard about his loss from Adam, and didn't know what to really do about it. She wanted to comfort him, but didn't want to encourage him that it was a step back in their relationship as friends. To only go to him after the funeral to talk about his biological brother and wanting to meet him. But never will.
Life was hard when she left Angel Grove nearly eight years ago. Life was even harder when she had sent him that dreaded letter, telling him that she had found someone new. Life was that much harder without him by her side.
She missed him. Missed him so much. And wanted him to release all the tension and stress in her small form. She wanted her prince on a white tiger back to comfort and hold her. Protect her and tell her things were going to be okay. She didn't realize how much she needed him, until that tragic event brought the old crew together.
In the little free-time she had, she would continue to write songs and play the guitar. Many of the things she wrote were in fact about him. About them. About the heartbreak. About the friends she had left behind. It wasn't like her stuff was something the rest of the world would like. But it touched her soul deeply. Lots of people just don't appreciate real music. Music that comes from the heart and soul of the writer. Those are the real winners. I must have been a fool to let him go all those years ago. Why would I ever think that Kat was trying to take him away from me? She was encouraging me to move deeper into our relationship, and I had assumed wrong. But then I had to meet someone out in Florida, and things had changed completely.
She didn't have to lie. She did met someone when she was in Florida. She did think he was the one who could replace Tommy. She did sleep with him, too, when she and Tommy were still trying to make their long-distance relationship work. But she didn't mention that in the letter. Didn't want to crush him more than she already did. Writing it in a letter was so much more easier than in a phone call or in person.
His name was Carl Lopez, an assistant coach, trying to make the position in the Pans Global Division for track & field. He was a young, respected man, especially by the head coach, Gunther Schmidt. He was cute. Three years older than her, which made him 20 years old when she met him. He was of Hispanic descent, and had that sort of sexy Antonio Banderas accent. He was very athletic, too. But would eventually stay in the position as a coach rather as a competitor.
There were so many things that were drawing her to him, but for all the wrong reasons. She was new in town, didn't know her way all that well, and he was there to pick up the slack-- if not more. He liked her. She had to admit he didn't look too bad, either. Flirted with her, though she had given him fair warning in the beginning, she had someone--Tommy. He understood, but never took his eyes off her. And one night, late into training, when she missed a flip, hitting the mat hard, he was there to comfort her. And there to pull her into a mesmerizing kiss that seemed to evade all other issues on her mind. At that moment nothing matter, but the two of them. She didn't even think about Tommy at that time.
When she realized what she had done, she never felt so dirty. She never felt so guilty. But she couldn't tell Tommy the news. She figured it was a one time thing and kept her distance from Carl as much as she could. She hadn't spoke of it to Tommy, though. Couldn't do it. Or risk losing what she had with him. But then, that weekend of Thanksgiving, Carl had invited her to join his family in the festivities of a Mexican dinner. She wouldn't be going home to her family, not with the training. It was a nice gathering, realizing she had never really partook in Tommy's family gathering. But she knew how sensitive a subject of family was to him.
That next morning when she woke up, she never felt like such a whore in her entire life. The night before she had no regrets, but when she rolled over and realized the person she clung to wasn't of her true love, but of another, she knew what she had to do. She couldn't deny it now, that she was falling for Carl, and as the weeks went by, so did her relationship with Tommy. She hid it well that Christmas when he came down to see her.
It crushed her inside to write that letter, but it had to be done. It was almost like a New Year's Resolution. She couldn't put him in anymore pain than what he didn't know or needed to know. She had to let him go. Hope he could find a love with someone more loyal than she had been–like Kat.
Now, here she was, eight years later, kicking herself again for going to Florida, even if Tommy was the first to persuade her to go. She broke things off with Carl when she found out he was sleeping around with almost all the girls on the team. That wasn't even a year-long relationship. And she soon found out it was lust with him. It covered up the pain in never seeing her own loyal, true man every single day. She made it more than two years with Tommy, and they never even got as far as to sleeping together. The make-out session got rather hot, but never beyond it. That's what made their relationship so much more special. They were waiting for the right moment. And when she looked back at the night with Carl, it was peer pressure.
But it wasn't going to be the last time she'd do that with him. She had done it nearly ten more times before breaking it off. Lucky for her, she wasn't pregnant, or carried a disease, as far as she could tell.
Oh, god, baby. What have I done to you? What have I done to us? You can hate me for the rest of your life, but you have a right to know I still have strong feelings about you, Tommy.
She was crushed. She could barely breathe. But she couldn't even shed any tears, as much as she wanted to. She couldn't.
She got out of the car, and retreated into the gas station for a cool beverage, and a map of the area. When she returned, she slumped back in the seat, turning her head to the sky, shielding the sun as it came crashing down. "How hard can it be to find him?"
She was getting frustrated at the dead-ends her friends were giving her. She pulled out her cell phone, and hoped that Jason could clear up a few things that clouded her mind.
The phone rang two times before the receiver clicked, giving clearance that someone was on the other line.
"Hey, baby sis." Jason said as he always did with her. "What can your older brother do for you, now? And do not tell me you're having your second thoughts about seeing him."
Kimberly shook her head, smiling. "However did you guess, Jason?"
"C'mon, Kim. He's dying to see–well, maybe not dying, but he will. Trust me. He needs it. Besides, maybe you can finally give him that much needed special back rub and bed-time tucking, if you get my drift. You guys have waited far too long to pass it up."
Kimberly groaned. "Don't try to push me anymore than you should, Jason. I mean, I love him and everything, but I don't think having him sleep with me for one night will change his mind about him taking me back."
Jason sighed. "C'mon, Kim, you're talkin' to his best buddy here. I think I know when it's obvious he's thinking about wanting to have sex with you. It's killing him, but he's in denial. You gotta wake him up, Kim. I mean, me and the guys have tried, but have gotten nowhere. He's a damn rock."
She fell silent, feeling a little offended about Jason calling her love a rock.
"Sorry." He apologized, after she said nothing. "But it's true. He needs someone to call his own. He needs someone in his life. And that's you, Kim. It was you. And it will always be you."
"Thanks, Jase. You know how to cheer someone up when they're having their doubts."
"Hey, it's me, the original-fearless-leader. And didn't you always do that with him? It's a given for friends. But it's a rare gift to have in a relationship, especially when each of you know it. You gotta talk to him, Kim. He's falling apart."
She sighed, and switched to her headset as she turned the engine over. She was saddened by Jason's last statement. Was he really falling apart? What's wrong , baby? I'm coming. You can tell me, and I'll make it better. Just tell me where you need the healing.
She pulled out the small piece of paper that had Tommy's address on it. But it was already plastered in her head like super glue. 1992 Valencia Road. Reefside, CA. She broke the map open, searching the street names, while multi-tasking between keeping a conversation going with Jason, driving, and reading street signs as she drove by.
"How hard can it be to find his place?" she grew a little frustrated.
"If you're in town, you'd better stop searching now. He sorta isolated himself from the rest of the city." Jason admitted, knowing exactly how closed his best buddy was becoming every time he made the visit to see him.
"Isolated himself?" She was surprised, as she forced the car to a stop on an alley street. "Why? He always liked to be the center of attention."
"That would be Tommy of the past. The one you're looking for, now, is more isolated, and trying to find inner peace within himself."
"Okay. This is definitely a mistake, Jas—"
"No. No. No." He cut her off. "Don't give me the same bullshit he is giving me, Kim. I won't lie to you. He isn't who he was a few years ago, but I know he's still there hiding behind all those closed doors. He misses you, even if he is denying it. I know that. It's in the way he tries to relay our conversation away from you. He still loves you, Kim."
She looked down, wanting the tears to fall, but there were none to come crashing down. "Really?"
"Yes." He breathed, with some frustration. "You gave it plenty of time. The last time you guys saw each other was at the funeral, and even then you couldn't look at each other. It's because you weren't ready. But now, you are. I know you are. And I'm getting tired of trying to play cupid in all this."
Kimberly couldn't help but laugh, imagining Jason walking around with wings, a toga and arrows, bringing together each pair of rangers he found suitable for each other. "Have you even told him about you and Kat?"
"I don't know." He shrugged. Everyone else knew about him and Kat being a thing, about his proposal to her, and her acceptance in the ring. They were scheduled to get married in the fall. And they all knew. Except Tommy. "Let him figure it out when I get this whole ranger reunion set up."
"You're really not going to give up on it, are you?"
"Hey!" he called out. "You all liked the idea as much as me. It's just Mr. World's Greatest "Cold-Hearted" Ranger doesn't want to put his say in the whole thing. But ya know, he needs to see the old crew, anyways. There is a lot of catching up we gotta do as a whole."
She shook her head, knowing she couldn't change the original leader's mind about this little ranger reunion they're planning to put up for Tommy. "Ya know, if he finds out you were behind the whole "inviting-me-out-to- Reefside-to-go-see-him" than he isn't gonna talk to me ever again."
"You told me you wanted to see him. So, I'm giving you that, Kim. Go talk to him. Now, don't worry about the little reunion, me and the guys got that covered. You just worry about making sure he cries out like he needs to."
"Jason!" she turned bright red.
"Sorry," he apologized. "We're all adults here, it's not like it's that much of a big deal. But I'm serious! Either the guy just doesn't want to admit he's still a virgin, or he just hasn't kicked it with anyone who could deliver it like another ranger could."
She turned bright red under the comment he made, feeling rather guilty about the topic. And embarrassed. She knew he wanted as much of a full report as she could give about their little "Operation: Reunited Forever", considering he was the mastermind behind the situation.
"Well, hey, I'll let you go." Jason admitted, noting the late hour of the day. "Oh, and just look for a road saying 'Green Valley Blvd' and follow it north toward the woods. It'll be obvious where he lives, once you find the street, all right?"
She held her breath, at the moment of him mentioning the word 'green'. The first color you ever wore when I meet you, baby. I still remember what you wore, and that loss, confused puppy look in your eyes.
"Hey, Kim, you got that?" Jason called out, noticing she had spaced out.
"Huh?" she threw her head back. "Yeah, I heard that. North on Green Valley Blvd. I won't forget. Thanks again, Jason."
"Hey, I'm always here. Talk to you later, baby sis."
"Bye, Jason." She replied and hung up.
She let out a sigh, and pulled the car out of park. And turned the wheel that took her back to the main road, in search for her one and only true love.
tbc.........