Every Heart For Years

Chapter One - Need

It's a funny thing, fear. We fear lots of things. We fear the lose of family, the lose of friends, to lose sight of your own self. But what happens when you actually do lose? Most of us just put up and stick up. We keep going. But what if you can't. If you lose yourself, how are you supposed to keep going? Suddenly every decision you make means less and less to you each time you have to make it. Morals drop to the point where they were just silly little things getting in the way.

For most of us, we have people to help us find our way back. But if we could live forever, and we had no one to help us back, we'd sink down into nothing. We'd become nothing. Without those around us, we would be nothing. Maybe that was why I wasn't as afraid as I should have been. Staring straight down into a gun, the one that belonged to none other than The Humanoid Typhoon. Vash The Stampede, the man who killed because he could. Perhaps things are far more gray than we ever thought possible.

I was just as much of a nothing as he was.

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Meryl couldn't move. Staring straight down into the gun made her feel like she was staring straight towards hell. She shook, not even really sure if it was fear she was feeling, or more the feeling of how her father must have felt when the bandits pointed the gun straight into his face too. Her eyes traveled down to see his finger almost stroking the trigger, as though he wasn't sure he wanted to do it, but in a split second, she saw the worst thing, he pulled it.

Meryl's eyes shot shut, by pure instinct alone. She whimpered slightly as her brain slowly processed what happened. Click. She opened her eyes, the light in the room shifting to the point where she could actually see him. Blond hair like Knives had said, red coat, eyes covered by golden sunglasses. A smirk sat on his lips before he started to chuckle, but certainly not one of an innocent man. It was as cold and degrading as his voice.

Almost instantly her eyes seemed to dry up from the smoke and threatened tears that she had wanted to spill. A growl came from within her throat, and he must have heard it because he stopped laughing, turning to look at her through his glasses. Her fists were drawn up at her sides, and she still shook. Raising his brow slightly he didn't even see what came next. His sunglasses bounced across the floor and he found himself staring at the ground slightly.

Meryl glared at the man before her. He had lowered his gun slightly, his free hand rest on his cheek as though it was a pure shock to find someone had actually hit him. The sting in his face was unfamiliar to him. Sure, every now and then he got nicked by a bullet or hit by a falling rubble from around him, but never had someone stood in front of him and back handed him across the face for the prank he often pulled on humans. Such easy things to frighten and yet somehow the one in front of him didn't seem to care that it could have been a bullet in her head.

Narrowing his sea green eyes, he sat up and lifted his head along with his gun. Glaring straight back into her gray but solid eyes, which to his disappointment, no longer held fear, he tried to find some kind of reasoning to it. After everything he had ever done, the destruction, the pain, the horror he caused even to her for a split second, she simply stood in front of him. She even had the chance to run, and yet she still stood up to him.

Watching him stand up in front of her, she began to realize how much taller he was than her. Her head stopped dead at his shoulder. Lifting her head to continue to glare at his eyes, she crossed her arms over her chest. Huffing sharply he tapped the tip of his gun against her forehead, not really surprised when she didn't even flinch. Another growl however did rise up from her chest and it almost sent him laughing again.

" Well what the hell are you just standing there for? Am I really that great of a thing to watch or are you actually starting to get bored?" That caught Vash off guard. He dropped the gun slightly, eyes widening a bit before he lowered his face close to hers, his eyes finally eye level with her. She could feel his breath against her face, so she huffed back at him, which caused him to growl at her this time.

" What the hell is it with you?" Well now it was Meryl's turn to be shocked. Though it had been cold, it came out in a soft tone, as though he hadn't actually meant to ask it aloud. Her eyes widened like his and they simply stared at each other for a moment. Meryl started to open her mouth, but he moved again and she knew exactly what landed on the back of her neck to send pain reeling throughout her entire body before she passed out. Stupid silver gun…

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Meryl let out a groan as she rolled over onto her side. Opening her eyes slowly, she sat up, reaching back to her neck to rub gently there. " Ow shit!" She cursed and bit down on her bottom lip as she let her hand drop. Looking around, she found herself inside Milly's room back in their hometown. Letting out another soft groan she pulled herself from the bed as Milly ran into the room and practically tackled her back to the bed.

" Meryl you had us so worried! You've been out for days, and we didn't know what to do! Knives and I carried you pretty much the whole way home." Meryl blinked softly. Home? Oh yeah, I have been living with Milly and Knives ever since Father…Sighing a little she patted her onto of her head. " I'm alright… do you know what happened?" Milly nodded and bit her bottom lip looking like she was going to fall apart again.

" You were walking down this alleyway and just as Knives and I spotted you, this huge chunk of the building came undone and hit you in the back of your neck. We thought it might have broken your neck…" Meryl stared at the bed a moment. Blue green eyes, empty and lost… cold and painful…I could have sworn I saw him! Looking up at Milly, she tilted her head carefully off to one side.

" Did… Did Knives find Vash?" Milly tilted her head too. " No, he said that while we were picking you up, he moved on. Why?" Shaking her head, she stood and started down the stairs, leaving a rather shocked Milly behind. In the kitchen as expected she saw Knives staring out the window with his cold hard stare. " What color are his eyes?" Knives growled and looked over at her. " They aren't the same as mine. Not like you'll ever see them, he keeps them hidden behind glasses." Meryl growled this time, looking ready to punch him when he gave her a small shrug.

" They're a blue green aren't they?" He had been reaching for his glass when he stopped cold. The look he was giving her nearly made her crawl inside her skin. Before she could even answer him, the back of her neck sent her reeling to the floor in pain. Clenching her fists and eyes shut as tightly as she could, she let out a half scream of pain. Somewhere far away she heard a voice. Familiar and nearly frightening.

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" Well your alive. Was kind of hoping I broke your neck." Broke my neck? What… I don't… She forced her eyes open to find them seeing nothing but dark. Stiffening sharply she hissed out her breath, feeling fingers pressing into her neck. Hard, like they wanted to reach for her spine but after a moment the slowed into a soft steady massage. She realized she was lying on her side, and someone was lying behind her.

She tried to swing her elbow back, but with her neck in so much pain, he must have seen it coming. A soft chuckle came from him and he easily caught her elbow in a tight grip. She winced and relaxed, knowing she had no reason to fight at the moment. I was dreaming… why was I dreaming that? Grumbling under her breath, she felt the large man shift to sit up behind her. His right hand was still on her neck, pressing and massaging gently, something she didn't think was even possible for someone like him. He seemed distracted though, still holding her elbow.

I don't like the way he's looking at me. Having rolled her head slightly to look at him, his eyes bore holes into her. She couldn't help but stare at him though. He was handsome, and obviously well muscled. The red coat was hanging across on the other side of the room; leaving him in complete black outfit, gun still strapped to his leg. Biting down on her bottom lip she muttered at him. " What are you staring at… where are we--- am I?"

He grinned a little, one that surprised her. It wasn't an evil looking grin, just one that an innocent boy would give, but it fell away quickly and his entire being suddenly become cold. Including the grasp he held on her arm. She shivered at the sudden change she felt in the room and he pushed her away from him both at the neck and the elbow, effectively pushing her off the small bed. She let out a small yelp but bit down on her bottom lip before anything else came out.

" I don't know what the hell I'm staring at. Maybe a puny looking under developed woman of a girl." She gapped at him before hopping to her feet, staggering for a moment. " You LOOKED at me!?" He smirked and rolled his eyes. " You're my prisoner, I can do what I want with you, though you're not even worth looking at." She screeched at him and tried to jump at him. He caught her arms easily as she tried to grab at him, looking ready to tear him apart. She still doesn't seem to realize WHO I am.

Maybe she burned too bright too fast, or she just couldn't handle the insults after taking such a whack to the back of her head, but stopped and stared at him, almost softly for a moment. " Your really Vash The Stampede aren't you?" He growled and looked ready to push her away, but suddenly the resistance of holding her away from him stopped and she fell down to the bed unconscious, her legs curled under her resting on the floor. Grumbling sharply at the woman next to him, he released her arms and got up from his side of the bed, just leaving her half on the bed and on the floor.

He groaned softly and ran his fingers through his un-spiked hair. Why the hell do I do this? She's like every other human. Weak and pathetic, unable to live alone… she was traveling with my brother and his new 'wife'. My god how could he marry one of these things!? He stared down at the small woman not to far from him and stuck out his tongue slightly. " Gross…" Flopping into a chair, he grinned happily as he reached over the table to grab a donut. " I guess they have their good sides."

He nearly dropped the donut from his mouth as the woman gave a moan and tried to roll over. Blinking softly as he stared at her, she stared to roll off the bed and moments later there was a resounding 'thud' as she landed there. He snorted a laugh before she whimpered and moved her head to one side, which left a very sickening crack as she did so. Rolling his eyes slightly, he stood and reached down. Picking her up with easy, he placed her completely back on the bed. " Stupid girl." Think I might have hit her a little too hard. There is a reason I left her alive, much less am dragging her around. Until I find that, she isn't going anywhere. Once I find my answer, then I can kill her. Snorting softly he nodded. " I need to know… why…"

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