Prompt: Could you write a fan fic in which Deeks is forced to incapacitate Kensi during a case in order to save her life, and how guilty he feels after? I got the idea after rewatching last season's NCIS episode "Head of the Snake."

"How's she doing?" Deeks asked, propelling himself off the hospital wall the second he saw Callen come out of Kensi's room. He'd been skulking in the hallway ever since he got back from giving Sam his statement, dying for any piece of information.

Callen started ever so slightly at Deeks' sharp inquiry, but otherwise didn't seem that surprised to see him there.

"You can ask her yourself," he responded. "They're supposed to release her soon." He paused as Deeks nodded, not meeting his gaze, unable to. "Is there a reason why you don't want to talk to Kensi?"

Deeks would have laughed if he didn't feel so sick and genuinely awful inside.

"I don't think that's a great idea."

"Why? If this is about—"

"Yes, this is about me hurting her," Deeks interrupted. It made him want to hit something just thinking about it. Instead, he held himself as straight as he could, his posture, tight, brittle, ready to crack at any second with the wrong word.

"Deeks, I know you're upset, and things didn't go the way we planned—"

"Go the way we planned?" Deeks stared at Callen in disbelief. Everything had gone wrong. "Callen, I hit her, tackled her to the ground, I strangled her until she passed out." He choked on the last word and dipped his head. Eyes focused on the scratched gray and white linoleum; his voice was softer when he spoke again. "I'm her husband and partner. I'm supposed to protect her, and I didn't do that today."

Callen stayed quiet for several seconds, long enough that Deeks decided he'd won the argument.

"Either way, you need to talk to Kensi," he said finally. He started to say something, stopped, and then started again. "She was asking for you."

"I don't think I can—"

"Like you said, she's your wife and partner, Deeks," Callen reminded him, throwing his own words back in his face. "You owe her that."

Deeks flinched; Callen might as well have called him a coward. He was right though. Kensi deserved the chance to see him, to tell him whatever she was feeling regardless of his own guilt and fear. His shoulders caved, and he nodded, crossing the short distance to Kensi's room.

"It'll be ok," Callen promised.

Deeks rapped on the door a couple times before opening it slowly. Kensi sat in the center of the hospital bed with her left cheek pillowed on her raised knees. She startled as he came in, head popping up, and a look of fear crossing her face for a brief second.

"Deeks," she whispered hoarsely.

All he saw was the long cut bisecting the right side of her face, a deep, darker abrasion along her hairline. The ring of bruises around her throat.

Deeks gasped, flashing back to just a few hours ago. In a dark warehouse, surrounded by armed men who suddenly decided Kensi was a lability and turned their weapons on her. She'd caught his eye, sending him a wordless message, and in desperation, Deeks acted.

He'd charged, engaging in combat with a level of aggression he never used with Kensi. Kensi fought back just as hard for the first few blows, then let him get a few good hits in. Let him overpower her and wrap his hands around her throat. Let him squeeze until she wheezed, panic entered her eyes, and eventually she'd lost consciousness.

His heart had thundered the entire time with fear as she dropped limply to the ground, bleeding.

"Deeks?" This time he was the one to jerk, taking an entire step back as he came to the present, faced with Kensi staring at him, disquiet in her eyes.

"Hey. How—how are you?" he asked, eyes darting over the IV inserted in her right hand and the brace on her other hand. He hadn't even realized he hurt her wrist.

"Ok." It came out nearly soundless and she winced, clearing her throat. "Just a few cuts. I told the doctor I was fine, but he insisted on keeping me for a couple of hours and a round of antibiotics," she finished, shrugging it off like the list of injuries she'd just rattled off, the ones she hadn't, were commonplace.

"Is there anything I can get you? You're probably hungry," Deeks rambled, needing to fill the silence.

"I'm not hungry. But you could warm me up," Kensi said, holding out her arms. "It's freezing in here." Somehow she managed to fill the words with innuendo despite her hoarse voice.

"I'll go get your bag."

"No, I just want you to hold me."

"That's not a good idea," Deeks told her, feeling slightly nauseous at the thought of touching Kensi right now with her injuries still fresh. He swallowed it down, grabbing at a handful of hair. "I hurt you and I can't—god, I'm so sorry, Kensi."

"Deeks, Jackson was going to kill me if you didn't step in," she said, sounding confused.

"But I should have figured something else out. I didn't have to be so rough."

"It had to be believable," Kensi whispered. She held out her arms again, then made a frustrated noise when Deeks didn't move closer, and unceremoniously yanked the IV needle out of her hand.

"Kensi!" She ignored his protest, sliding out of bed. He rushed over just in time to catch her as one of her legs buckled. "Kensi, get back in bed."

"Not until you quit believing this is your fault." She wrapped her arms firmly around his waist, linking her hands behind his back so her head rested on his chest. Deeks shuddered at her closeness, cherishing the feeling even as he told himself he shouldn't be allowed this comfort. "Because I don't blame you, Deeks," she continued. "I trusted you to keep me safe and you did."

"I promised myself I would never hurt you," Deeks breathed. Kensi curled the fingers of her good hand in his hair and gently tugged until he was forced to meet her gaze.

"Deeks, listen to me. You didn't choose to hurt me. I trust you, I love you, and what happened today hasn't changed either of those things at all." She paused, shifting to cup his jaw. "And even though I don't blame you at all, I forgive you."

Deeks squeezed his eyes shut as tears filled his eyes and Kensi kissed the corner of his mouth. Something broke in him at that and he clasped her to him, burying his head in her shoulder as they clung to each other.

"I love you," he managed, between sobs. Kensi made a hoarse sound, kissing him fiercely, and he felt her damp cheeks on his. Holding her as tightly as he could, Deeks promised himself he would do everything in his power to never let anything like this happen again.