Sinon and I stood on the summit of a cliff overlooking an oceanic region in its golden hour. A beach laid hundreds of meters below us, and the sun slowly crept below the horizon, reflecting the real life time in-game. The beautiful red tint of sky remained prominent, and I felt a light breeze of salty seashore water on my skin.
The wind wasn't brisk enough to make us shiver, though. It was the perfect temperature in the perfect relaxation spot with the perfect scenery. Everything about this place felt perfect.
We were on the twelfth floor, and it was August 15th. We had made it. We had freaking done it.
And I couldn't be prouder.
The beta test would end at midnight, signifying the end of our long and arduous journey. We unanimously decided to take the final last few hours as rest after the work we spent on getting here. Sinon rested on the grassy and somehow cushioning rock below us that made for a natural headrest and reclining chair. I joined him soon after and stayed silent for a few moments, just basking in the marvels of our accomplishments.
It felt like it was right about time to tell him. To tell him not to play the official game when it comes out. To warn him of what's going to happen.
"Hey, Sinon?" "Hey, Deruta?" We both spoke at the same time.
I internally kicked myself for doing that.
"Uh, you go first," I said quickly.
"Er, yeah. It's just – I have something I need to tell you," he started before pausing.
I waited for him to continue, but I kept thinking about what I'd say to him.
"I - uh, I-" he tried, but the anticipation got to me and I blurted something out by accident.
"You can't play SAO next Sunday!"
The words just slipped out of my mouth. That was my fault.
Sinon's face was a bit of a roller coaster on its own. It went from confusion to betrayal to anger to depression to about to slit my neck. The conversation forced us to our feet.
"What the hell?! You can't just say that! We've been playing together for the past month nonstop, and you know next Sunday's my birthday!" he yelled. I know it was just his avatar, but his angry face looked pretty cute. "You promised we would play on my birthday…"
The last part he said ended rather quietly as a dejected expression floated up to his face.
I screwed up, didn't I? And the worst part is, since SAO's launch caused many players' deaths rather early on, I couldn't afford to wait very long after the game's start to start playing, otherwise my dad would stop me from logging on.
Sinon wouldn't enjoy being ignored in favor of choosing to play Sword Art Online, a game we said we'd play together, on his birthday of all days.
"I- Sinon, it's not like that, it's just… You can't play Sword Art Online on August 21st. Heck, you can play it on August 22nd, just not August 21st!" I amended.
He didn't like that much.
"What, but you can? Deruta, what the hell's going on here?! Do you just not want to play with me? Have all of these days we spent together meant nothing to you?!" He was almost screaming at the end of that sentence.
"No, that's not it, just-"
"Just what, Deruta? Just 'another excuse'? We- I thought we had something special. I guess not," he said as he pulled up his menu with his fingers.
"No, Sinon, wait!" I yelled as he hit the log out button and his avatar disappeared with one last look of betrayal sent my way.
I felt like utter trash. How could I have messed that entire thing up so quickly and so effectively? I chuckled almost in spite. That's rather typical of me, isn't it? Ruining relationships, I mean.
Whatever. No need to think about that. What's important is that Sinon will not be joining Sword Art Online and is now safe. I don't need to worry about him anymore, so as terrible as that was, it did end how I intended.
But, no matter how pragmatic I was about it, I just lost a friend. No, I didn't just lose a friend. I lost my best friend. My only friend. He was basically my life for most of middle school. If I hadn't met him that year, well, I'm not sure what I would have done.
Screw it. I wanted to spend the rest of the beta waiting for the clock to hit midnight, but without Sinon, it was pointless. I logged off and exited the NerveGear.
That was the last day of freedom I'd have in the world of Sword Art Online.
~Several Days Later~
Sinon had not contacted once throughout the entire time. I sent a few messages saying 'I'm sorry' and et cetera to the general same effect, but I knew they wouldn't mean much to him. Especially not after how I broke up with him… er, for a lack of a better term.
Y'know, there are quite a few coincidences going on with Sinon. His avatar had short, blue hair and rather bright bluebell eyes. The exact same shade as Sinon from Sword Art Online, and they even share the same name…
That was a pretty concrete connection, but I couldn't place anything down for sure. After all, my Sinon was a guy and the one from the show was a girl. Unless that was another one of those inconsistencies and Sinon was just a guy in this world, it was unlikely that I was talking about the same person.
I mean, Sinon had the exact same name even when the anime still existed, right? He even said he watched some of it to a degree.
Then again, Kayaba Akihiko was also alive then. Did he exist before the anime and web novels disappeared, or did he just appear out of thin air once Sword Art Online was gone? I didn't remember reading his name anywhere, but that could've just been happenstance.
Well, whatever the case, I didn't have much time to worry about it. There were nearly ten minutes before Sword Art Online's service version became public to the world, and the death game began. My dad, fortunately for me, was out working this Sunday. He won't come back home until later tonight, and by then, he'll have seen the news. No dangers of him removing the headset.
I sighed as I laid down in my bed sheets with the NerveGear over my head. The last thing I'll have said to Sinon was "happy birthday" before getting trapped in this dumb game.
Maybe if things were different, then this whole thing wouldn't have happened. Sinon and I would still be friends, and life would be normal.
No point in thinking too much about it.
The clock ticked down in seconds until 1 PM. Tick… tick…
I suddenly felt rather hesitant to actually follow through with my plan. I wish this entire SAO thing never happened. Why did I have to be the one who remembered? Why was it my responsibility?
And why did I have to leave? My home, my dad, my friend…
A single teardrop ran down my cheek. I didn't even notice I was getting teary until it had left my eye. Whatever, it doesn't matter. I don't even matter. I just need to get through this damn game and then it'll all be okay.
No one will die.
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…
"Link, start!"
Shino was not having a good day, much less a good birthday.
Her best friend in the whole wide world had ended their friendship a week before her birthday and broke a promise she had taken to heart. It was heart crushing, to say the least.
She pulled her legs up and wrapped her arms around them from on top of her chair at her desk. The clock above her computer ticked the seconds away in the background as she thought about her situation.
Very little had come in between Deruta and her in the past. She just couldn't understand the sudden change in him. Why had he rejected her? Surely he had a reason, but all he said was that she couldn't play Sword Art Online on the 21st, her birthday. He knew it was her birthday, too, so why, then?
Why had he broken their promise?
She felt her eyes burn from the tears she had already expelled, leaving none left to cry. It didn't matter to her, she needed to stop crying anyway, but when left to her own devices, her mind couldn't stop wandering to Deruta…
He had abandoned her, and couldn't stop herself from drawing parallels to her mom after her dad died. Shino didn't blame her for that, she never could, but something inside of her, even if it was only a shred, resented her for that. Shino needed a father in her life, and growing up without one and with a mother who would only grieve did not help.
Especially after the incident. She needed her mother after that, but where was she? Nowhere to be found.
Her cries were silent to the world. She had to suffer her burden alone and without any help from anyone. Her mother was not there for her, and her grandparents did not have nearly the level of empathy that they should have had.
But then came along Deruta. He didn't know a thing about her plight, and yet, just by being there, he made things better. He was the friend she had always wished she had and never thought she could actually find.
Some days, she wanted to tell him everything. Tell him her identity, her name, what happened two years ago, everything. But she was scared, and she knew that. She was scared that he might leave her, just like everyone else did. She was scared that she'd lose her only friend.
She sucked in a breath of air and slowly let it out to avoid hyperventilation.
Shino would never admit it, but she wasn't sure if she could live on any longer without someone by her side like Deruta had been.
Narrowing her eyes, she tried to think back to where it went wrong – why he acted the way he did and said the things he said.
But all she could remember was the look in his eyes when he said it. He wasn't angry with her, nor did it appear as if he hated her. All she could see was fear. He was scared. Just as scared as she had been.
He was scared of losing his only friend.
They hadn't realized just how much they relied on each other until they were apart. It was poetic, almost.
Shino grimaced as she worked up the courage to slide the NerveGear onto her head and lay down on her bed. With a sad expression on her face, she looked at the time.
2:43 PM.
She'd find out why he did it, if it was the last thing she'd do. Her hands gripped in determination as she cleared her throat.
"Link, start!"
The tutorial NPCs would have called the cops on me if they had feelings. The moment my NerveGear loaded up, I got through the character customization screen, and my avatar, just like old times, fazed into existence in the world of Aincrad. I jumped the place, pushing through players and NPCs alike, until I found myself in the marketplace.
Using the starting cash, I purchased the proper starting gear and skipped town. There were enemies in all of the usual locations; perfect for some quick leveling. Although, it was unlikely that I'd get enough experience to level up just yet. That was fine, the materials that dropped were useful.
A Dire Wolf snuck up behind my avatar, which was transferred from the beta, and it jumped on my back, dealing grave amounts of damage. Being caught off guard, I spun around to see it maintaining its distance. Canine mobs will often remain within midrange so as to prevent basic melee attacks from striking, but still giving them the advantage of an attack at a moment's notice. By staying in that outer ring, they could easily circle their opponent and make calculated strikes before retreating and avoiding a counterattack.
Fortunately for me, I wielded a spear. Spears have a longer range than the average sword, with the expense of a more narrow attack radius. All I had to do was time and aim it properly to beat this guy. The wolf walked in circles around me, its prey, looking for an opening. I purposefully waited half a second before following its gaze so as to create an artificial weak point for it to attack.
The wolf cashed in on my 'mistake' and struck. It sped forwards, and it was mere inches from grazing my neck when I sidestepped to the left. The wolf, midair, realized the trick and jumped backwards the moment its paws hit the ground, but it wasn't fast enough to avoid my punishment.
It fell backwards after my spear pierced its fur. However, I had not activated a sword skill yet. It was time to make use of the opportunity and its stunned position. Making the motion of a beginning strike, I felt the familiar feel of energy the system released during the charging of a combat skill.
Finally, once I felt the energy climax, I was dashed forward and stabbed through the defenseless wolf. It shattered into shards of energy before a success screen popped up in front of me.
I grinned as I clenched my fist in determination. The same, amazing feeling of battle persisted after the beta test, and I couldn't be happier. That high kept me going for a month during the beta, and it'd better do me well for the next two years.
Suddenly, my nerves seized up. I felt like I was missing something crucial, so I thought back to everything I had just done to find my mistake. I bought equipment, ran into a field, and fought a lone Dire Wolf. My train of thought paused as I realized my mishap just a second too late.
Three more wolves approached, hidden by the tall grass. Wolves were pack animals. I wasn't alone.
I checked my health points – I was just under 75%. If fighting just one of those dropped me that low, I was well under the margin of error necessary for surviving against these three. If I were to defeat them sequentially, it'd be different, but I couldn't think of a way to isolate them.
Effective healing was dangerous, as my only potions healed 50% of current health, so I'd lose an entire 25% if I used one now.
My thinking cost me time as the three began their basic movement patterns, circling their enemy and preventing escape. Now, I only had one viable option: Attack.
It's fine; I'd done loads of risky stuff like this in the beta. It'd all work out, right? …right?
At any one individual instant, I could only visibly see two of the wolves thanks to their strategy, the third hidden behind my field of view. It seemed as if they were growing more intelligent, as this time, they stayed back further than the reach of my spear. It was like they were learning from their comrade's death. Why, game? I prefer predictable enemies.
Once again, my nerves clenched as I saw two of them lunge for me, and if I were to guess, the third one behind me did so simultaneously. Gritting my teeth, I attempt to sidestep as quickly as possible, but I can only evade one of them as the other two land their attacks and bite flesh from my skin.
The pain was uncomfortable, but not necessarily debilitating. The sensation was unique to the NerveGear; a feeling of great discomfort that felt like those prank hand buzzers, but over a greater area and for an extended period of time.
That wasn't what bothered me, though. What got me was my health bar at the top left of my vision dropping deep into the yellow.
I shook off the two wolves that were actively trying to turn my arm and torso into mincemeat. In the split second that they fell from my body and hit the ground, they were defenseless, and I certainly capitalized on that.
Utilizing my spear, I activated a Linear, one of the earliest one-handed weapon skills that remained useful long into the mid to late game thanks to its power scaling. It allowed me to rush forward at inhumanly speeds and stab directly into the wolf's side, dealing great amounts of damage.
But its friends did not stand idly by.
While the one from before that attacked me was still getting back on its feet, the one that I dodged originally dashed in to rescue its friend I was currently skewering. The wolf used one of its natural monster talents of sprinting to leap forward and collide into me, forcing me backwards and away from the subject of my counterattack.
The wolf I was killing was saved by its comrade, but at what cost? It was now temporarily stunned thanks to head bashing me, and I for sure as hell was going to cash out on the opportunity. These are computers; they aren't supposed to display sentient or sapient emotions such as self-sacrifice for an ally.
This would've made me ponder more, but I'm not about to let them get the advantage from my incessant thought.
I twisted my spear around quickly and stuck into a downward motion, aimed straight at the wolf's skull. It pierced and did critical damage due to being a targeted attack at a vulnerable location. My foe dropped to the ground and exploded into shards. A one hit kill? Nice.
The feel of victory was interrupted by my final ambulatory opponent rushing in and beginning its attack. This time, however, I felt more prepared than before.
I dodged to the left, but as I did, its claws scraped against my cheek, proving how I had underestimated this creature. I tried to fend it off from a distance with my polearm, but it did not heed my minor grazes and instead prepared for another pounce. I could not do much to deal with this. It's entirely possible that dodging this time may be too slow to account for its newly invigorated speed.
The abrasion had forced me to take notice of my HP, and I realized I was not paying nearly the amount of attention to it as I should've been. I was now in the red after that headbutt and cut, leaving me with only a sliver of health left. I cringed in shock as my mind registered just the predicament I was currently in.
The wolf exploited my brief moment of unguardedness and launched its assail.
My life was in immediate and unavoidable peril.
The air suddenly felt almost heavy as I found myself struggling to breathe. The wolf was leaping in slow motion towards me. Each and every thought running through my head was geared in the direction of analysis. I had to win. I had to live. I could not die here.
I would not die here. So many people's lives are in danger; I can't leave them alone. Not when I know how it's all going to end! Besides, there was so much I had left to do in real life, like making up with Sinon and making my dad proud by getting a degree.
A notification was in my HUD, ringing out in slowmo. Was I stopped in time by the game, or was it just an increased perception speed?
My fingers moved to the alert gradually until they opened the window. A new ability was available to me.
Spinning Shield.
Spinning Shield is a form of Weapon Defense skills that applies to most bladed weapons. Once the skill is activated, the weapon will spin in a circle and block or muffle basic physical attacks. The higher the skill is leveled at, the more powerful attacks it can defend against.
Kirito had it in the novels, but I didn't know you could get it this early. What are the unlock conditions for it? It was labeled in the roster as restricted, so I had never learned how to obtain it.
But here it was.
Gripping my spear tighter, I felt my mind relax as time grew faster. The energy of the ability formed a powerful layer around my weapon and peaked. Holding my spear in front of me, as if to defend against the next attack, felt natural. Surreally so.
The spear spun in my hand as the wolf inched closer. The revolutions rotated quicker and quicker until the polearm was just a blur in my hand.
As the wolf clashed into the improvised shield, it was sent flying backwards, all of its forward energy completely negated. As it tumbled back onto the ground behind it, I ended the spinning motion of my spear and activated another Linear to impale it as it was down.
My blade cut cleanly through, forcing it to pop with the game's traditional death animation and SFX.
I heaved a heavy sigh of relief as I opened my inventory to drink one of my potions, before lumbering over to my final foe. A wounded wolf lay motionless on the ground, barely breathing and unable to fight back.
And I hesitated. I had seen the previous wolves' compassion and determination to save their friends. What if these monsters truly were alive and conscious of their actions? Did that make them inherently human-like?
I brought the spear down and ended its cruel suffering.
I don't care if they truly end up being human in intelligence and awareness. They are endangering real humans, and for that, I will not stop fighting these monsters until they are all extinguished when Aincrad breaks apart and falls into the abyss.
There was a limited amount of time before the forced teleportation, so I'd do well not to waste it.
Running through the fields and further outwards, I continued my onslaught.
Shino's character was already loaded in from the beta test, so when the game finally rendered and she found herself in the Town of Beginnings, there was a strong sense of déjà vu. But playing the game wasn't her purpose for being here, although she hoped that it would come sometime soon.
Instead, she pulled up her friends list on her menu, and to her relief, Deruta was still added on there.
She clicked on Message and a text box appeared before her, but she hesitated. She wasn't sure what she'd say to him. Did he hate her? Did she hate him? It was all too complicated, but she knew that she needed to talk to him, and it wasn't something that could be conveyed over words on a screen.
With her index finger, she flicked through the friends options until she landed on one that was to her liking. His status displayed his general location to her. He was in the fields of floor one. She sighed as she prepared herself with gear before going out to search for him.
She wasn't letting the answers escape her this time.
Some minor monsters attempted to impede her search, but she ended their lives gracefully and quickly with her twin daggers. It wasn't as if they could stop her, anyway. She was all too focused on finding him.
After running for much longer than she should have, she paused to take a break. The endless fields of Aincrad fluttered and sparkled with life and mirth, as if it were one living, breathing entity. It was nearing golden hour, and the sun's bright light washed over her face.
As she panted, she fell to the ground, her blue bangs covering her face. All of the heartbreak she had felt slowly crept back up on her when she wasn't paying attention. Deruta was the one in her life that mattered most to her, how could he have left?!
How the hell could he possibly have left her?! Shino couldn't cope by killing monsters any longer, she couldn't cope by running, she couldn't cope by screaming, so she did the last thing she could do: cry.
She was so immersed in the illusions of her past that she didn't even notice a player approaching her. The player, a green cursor floating above his head, chuckled spitefully as he brandished an axe.
Shino's cries slowed as she felt his presence from behind her. Turning around slowly, she caught sight of something she never thought she'd see again.
She recognized the axe he held. It was one that she had seen during the beta test. One of the more infamous players who caused mayhem by player-killing wielded the same exact one. It was no coincidence that this player held that axe in his hands.
Her eyes widened in fear as the axe began to rise above her head.
"You - you were always an excellent player in the beta, Sinon. I hope you know that I respect your abilities a lot, but I can't just let you go. Especially not with this prime opportunity on my hands. Imagine it: I, Morte, become the first player ever to successfully kill you. And my first kill out of the beta, no less; I'll go down in history!" he rambled on. Sinon narrowed her eyes.
He had almost two hours of experience over her. He had probably run through all of the early monsters already, meaning his base attack stat would be higher. Not to mention his weapon was upgraded.
If she fought him now, she'd definitely die. The only survival tactic was escape. She scrambled to her feet, but the axe dropped quicker than she could hope to dodge.
It seemed as if time had slowed down as the blade approached her skull. Not even seconds before striking into her and killing her, did Morte's hands begin to fade and disappear. He bursted into shards as the death animation and sound effects played.
His axe clattered to the ground where it rested harmlessly, unable to harm another soul. Behind Morte's evaporating corpse stood a man with pitch-black hair and a spear in a thrusted position. He looked inexplicably angry, absolutely fuming. He took a few seconds to compose himself before looking down at Sinon.
He tossed his spear away and hugged her. Shino did not push him away. She, instead, began to break down with him and cry. He joined her soon afterwards.
They just sat there as the sun set on the horizon, sobbing away their tears. But, little did the other know, each was crying for different reasons.
As I held him in my arms, I couldn't help but cry. No, I didn't just cry. I bawled. I bawled like a damn toddler. I was an inch away from turning toward the sky and screaming. Sinon had just as many tears rolling down his cheeks as I did, though, so I wasn't uncomfortable with it.
We just held each other there for a while. I think then was just about the time when it dawned on me how trapped we were.
When neither of us had any more tears to cry, we drew silent. I slowly released him from my hold and apologized.
He stood up, as did I, but I spoke before he could.
"Why did you follow me? Why? I told you not to play the game with me today, you knew that." I pointed at him accusatively. "So why? Why did you do it anyway?"
The volatile state of emotions I was in did not do me well. I don't even think I realized I was yelling until it had all been over with.
He stayed silent for a few moments, as if processing what I had just said, then replying.
"...so you still feel the same way. I came here to ask why you care so much. Why did you leave me? Why?!" he yelled back.
"No, you don't understand! You should've just stayed offline for the day, then it all would've been okay! Everything would've been okay! You wouldn't be here, and you'd be safe…!"
I wasn't paying attention to what I was saying as I said it. The words just rolled off my tongue as if I had been thinking of them all this time. I suppose I had.
"You're not supposed to be here. Damn it, you're not supposed to BE HERE." The words just kept on coming out of my mouth. "I WISH WE NEVER MET!"
Eventually, time slowed from the influx of emotions I had been feeling, and I looked at him. He was standing still but visibly shaken. It was then that I understood. I understood the impact of this stupid game.
Sinon was in here, and it was my fault. If he died, it was on me, and I hated myself for that. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I - I wish I was dead. I shouldn't be here. If it weren't for me, that Morte guy would still be alive.
If it weren't for me, Sinon's life wouldn't be in danger.
i hAte mYseLf
Shino flinched as the words flew at her face. Her best friend in the whole wide world hated her. Her best friend, her only friend, wished they had never met.
The vivid imagery of her mother flashed through her mind. In Shino's hands was the gun, the gun she shot that day, and behind her was her mother. Her mother's eyes were stretched open in fear. She was scared. Her mother was afraid. Afraid of her.
"What monster have I become?" she asked the darkness as it enveloped her. She couldn't breathe. She struggled to move her body and fight it as the hole slowly grew around her and forced her movements to a standstill. The pain swallowed her. But it wasn't like it was before. She felt numb.
She felt so damn numb. It was as if she hadn't felt anything for real since that day, and the thoughts still lingered in her mind that maybe she hadn't. Maybe she died that day, and this was just a sick dream, a trick her mind was playing on her.
A light shone in the darkness, but it was much too far away. A light at the end of the tunnel?
She remembered the days after the incident. How she had felt so lonely and depressed, how many times she had wished she could kill herself but couldn't. She remembered that all too vividly, but what stood out the most to her wasn't that.
It was Deruta.
A hand stuck out of the darkness, as if to help her to her feet.
Deruta knew her. Deruta was always there for her. Deruta comforted her when she was sad, and they had more fun together than she had had in her entire life. He was her childhood.
She tried to grab ahold of the hand, and the light grew. It fought the darkness.
When the beta test started, she couldn't help but feel the way she did. Everything about him was perfect. He was kind, smart, and strong. He never abandoned her. He was always there for her.
The light grew brighter.
When she was struggling with their loss on the third floor, he was there for her. They were a team, and they worked together tirelessly. She didn't realize it, but the happiest moments of her life were being updated so often as of recently.
Shino felt safe with him.
The world around her reappeared as she awoke from her dayterrors. The sun shone brightly in the sky and the grass surrounding them was comforting.
But what she noticed gave her pause. There he was. Deruta.
Deruta was lying there in the grass, thrashing. He was punching at the air and screaming. He couldn't even see her in front of him.
He kept repeating the same thing, over and over:
"It's all my fault."
One moment, I was looking at Sinon, practically fuming in hatred at myself, and the next moment, I was in a room, all alone.
The room was completely empty, with no doors or windows. I was alone, standing there like a fool.
How did I get here? How do I leave?
Those were all questions that would have seized my mind if I were thinking sanely. Unfortunately for me, I was not. Instead, I dropped to my knees and screamed.
Deep down, I knew that Sinon would follow me into the game, and I did nothing to stop him. I could've done something, but now, he was almost killed, and I murdered someone in front of me.
Now, we're trapped in a damn death game, and our lives are at risk.
And it's all my fault.
The walls of the room began to close in.
Everyone is going to die, and I can't save them. Everyone is going to die, and it'll all be my fault for not fixing it. I was the one given the knowledge of the future, but why was I chosen if things are just going to happen the exact same way as last time?
Sinon is going to die. I'm going to die. We're all going to die, and it's because of my idiocy. My own shortcomings. I should've planned harder, I should've trained harder, I should've predicted this whole damn thing. I should've been smarter.
But I'm not. And it's pretty obvious I never will be. The fleeting thoughts that I can't be held responsible completely evaded my mind. I had the ability to save someone and I messed it up.
Hundreds of people are probably already dead.
Hundreds. Damn hundreds.
We're all gonna die, and it's because of my stupidity, and it's ALL MY DAMN FAULT, I HATE MYSE-
An eruption of pain exploded from my cheek.
…
And there she was. Sinon. I could see her now. She wasn't a damn boy, what the hell had I been thinking? She was beautiful. I reached out as if to touch her face from my place on the dark room's floor, but I couldn't make it to her face. My hand stopped short. Why was she so far away?
Sinon was Shino Asada. A face flashed in my mind. The girl from class, the one from the finals. The one I had ignored for the whole year. Sinon's blue hair transitioned into the dark brown of her real life counterpart.
I sighed in contentment. I guess I should've known, and maybe I did, deep down, but still. I could feel the marvels of electric energy as I finally felt her cheek, and finally, the world came back to me.
Shino's tears dropped and hit Deruta's face as she cried above his motionless body. Her arms surrounded him on all sides and kept him pinned underneath her as she held him close. She tried her hardest to hold him still, but he had stopped convulsing a while ago.
What she had not realized was that it was her touch that comforted him.
After a moment of staying still on his chest, she felt arms envelop her in a blanket of warmth. The words that he told her fell silent on deaf ears, but she was more glad than she had been in years.
His fingers brushed a strand of hair behind her ear as he whispered more sweet nothings. The caressment felt so great. For once, her heart wasn't trying to kill her; there was nothing that could make this moment better.
You know, if someone had told me a year ago that I'd be in the world of Sword Art freakin' Online, I would've called them crazy. Heck, they would've been. They still would be, but that's neither here nor there. I just never thought that this would happen.
Sometime back in 2021, Sinon asked me a question. She asked what I would have done if I were faced between protecting the one you love and killing another person. I don't think I realized this at the time, but she was referring to… her incident. Wow. That's a thought.
And the worst part is, I can kind of see what she was thinking about now.
I killed someone. He was an orange player during the beta, and I knew he was going to kill other players in the future, but did that really justify his death? And by my hands, no less?
Perhaps not, but all I can think about when I see his corpse popping into a million little shards is Shino's face. Her life is all that matters.
Regrettably, I realized that I wouldn't mind it if people died, just so long as she lived. I didn't know what that said about me, but that was what was important.
Shino's lithe form was light in my arms, but I couldn't distract myself from the beauty I saw from her sleeping figure. I don't know how I didn't notice, but she was so obviously feminine. From the structure of her face to the shape of her body, I really don't understand how I could've missed it.
I was fine with it, though, because she was sleeping peacefully in my embrace. No point in chastising myself over the past.
I eventually gave in to the urge to fall asleep.
A tingly feeling woke Shino and I up. I knew that the moment couldn't last forever, but sleeping there in the fields with the sun beating down on us was heavenly. I was very reluctant to get up, despite knowing what was about to happen.
Shino rose to her feet before she began to visibly glow. No, I don't mean like smiling, I mean actually shining. A gleam of energy coated her skin before expanding outwards and covering her entirely. By the time it faded away, she was gone. I'm not an idiot, I knew that this was a scripted event. Heh, 'scripted'. In reality, I just know the future. How cool is that, huh?
The same bright light covered me, and once I regained my ability to see, I found myself standing next to Shino in the Town of Beginnings' town square. She looked very confused and I blanched. I realized that she didn't know what was happening and was just as in the dark as everyone else in this plaza.
Agh, I'm dumb. I should've told her when I had the chance, that way she wouldn't be scared. No matter the cost, I don't want to cause her any unnecessary grief. Shino tapped my shoulder and pointed up towards the sky.
A deep red hexagon blinked in the sky. A system announcement, eh? Ah, Kayaba, don't let anyone tell you don't like to be flashy, you murdering, sadistic jerk.
The blood extended from the bright warning and dropped to form a bowl where the figure of the GM slowly shaped and grew. Eventually, the blood was completely sucked into the ethereal being that floated in the sky above ten thousand players.
Shino glared, but I could tell it was just a facade. She was just as nervous as the others there. I sighed heavily and opted to stay quiet and wait for the Akihiko psychopath to begin talking.
I couldn't listen to him, though. The words just went straight over my head – I knew what he was going to say, anyway. Instead, I looked at the people around me. Some appeared confident, others afraid, some nervous, all confused.
Shino was the former of those. She confidently glared at the man in the sky as if he couldn't do a single thing to even touch her. It was cute, really. I found myself enamored with the girl more than I expected I would be lately. Perhaps it was just a release of pent up emotions, but something seemed to have changed.
But all of the confidence shattered the moment a very simple string of words left the Game Master's mouth.
"You cannot log out of SAO. Furthermore, no outsider will be able to turn off or take the NerveGear off of your head. A transmitter inside the NerveGear will release a microwave signal into your skull if anyone attempts, destroying your brain and terminating your life," the game master said, his hand moving forwards to gesture outwards.
Shino's facade was gone. Her expression, once determined, now stretched into fear. She was scared, and I hated that. I hated it so much.
I moved closer to her and wrapped my hand around hers in an attempt to provide comfort. She almost didn't even react, too concerned with Kayaba's words.
I know I should be reacting the same way she is, but I just can't do it. I had already spent the last few months suffering and turning over this exact same situation in my head, that it had lost all of its effect on me. At least, I hoped it had.
For the time being, I was left unconcerned and relaxed. My focus zoned out a little bit, too. For a death game, I sure was taking it rather lightly.
"Last, but not least... I've placed a little present in the item storage of every player. Please, have a look."
I was curious and decided to just leave it in my inventory for later. Why bother checking it out now? I knew what it was going to be, anyways. But the game did not enjoy such a thought and forced the mirror to appear out of my inventory against my will and without my permission.
I laughed a little. Of course that'd happen. That's just the most logical decision, after all.
I didn't even need to look into the mirror before I felt my avatar evaporating away before me. Even though I already knew it in my heart, I supposed it was time for proof. To see Shino in her true form. To see her again for what has felt like years already.
Shino's hand was still in mine when we rematerialized. The only major difference for me was my eye color. I had altered it in-game to prevent that stupid reaction people normally get when they see my deep blue eyes. It was fine, I could live with it.
I turned my head toward her and…
Damn. 'She' was actually a middle-aged and balding dude. Guess I was wrong.