Chapter 8

Accepting the Past

The minute Malfoy had gone to his room after proving his point, Hermione had risen and walked quietly to her room.

She straightened her robes and checked herself in the mirror. Hermione grabbed her brush and attacked her hair with it. She needn't let anyone in on the idea that something happened. Hermione wasn't going to tell anyone it was just a bad idea and she knew it. She couldn't believe she had thought about Malfoy in that way, ever. It was just wrong and it was a mistake.

She grabbed her cloak and Hogwarts, A History and glanced at her watch. It was 9:30, she'd have to hurry.

Hermione opened her door and walked out into the common room. To her disappointment Malfoy sat looking triumphant by the fire. "Aww, going to cry to the Weasel? Oh no, you can't do that can you. Granger can't tell her boyfriend that she kissed somebody else."

He's not my boyfriend, Hermione thought.

"And I'm sure Weasel won't be happy to find out it was me. Of course I think-"

Hermione didn't get to hear what Malfoy thought. Mid-sentence she had strode out of the portrait hole, shutting it behind her, cutting off the sound of Malfoy's sour voice.

As she stepped out into the dark corridor she pushed the incident to the back of her mind. Hermione made her way to Gryffindor tower, careful to be quiet so she wouldn't run into Mrs. Norris or Filch.

The Fat Lady sat in her frame, as always. As Hermione approached the woman gave her a scornful look.

"It's past curfew, m'dear." the Fat Lady said.

"Yes, yes. I know. I just...had some trouble tonight." Hermione replied, mumbling out the last part.

"Oh, right then. None of my business."

Hermione smiled gratefully at this and told her the password. As the portrait swung open Hermione heard very few sounds from within.

She glanced around the common room and was discouraged to find it relatively empty. Neville was talking animatedly to Lavender Brown who looked thoroughly amused. Ron and Ginny sat in a far corner playing wizard chess (Ginny had a triumphant look as one of her pieces shattered Ron's knight.). She waved to them but neither seemed to take all that much notice.

Hermione made her way to a chair near the fire only to notice that Harry was seated opposite her, staring into the fire looking utterly upset.

Hermione rose and crossed to him. She took a seat on the arm of his chair.

"Harry?" she asked, placing a hand on his shoulder, trying to get his attention.

Harry looked at her hand and followed her arm up to her face. "Oh hi, Hermione." he said, turning his attention back to the fire.

"What's wrong, Harry? You know you can tell me anything." Harry smiled at this and she took his hand.

This evidently attracted the attention of one Parvati Patil, who watched them with curiosity. Harry though, noticed this and asked Hermione if they could talk elsewhere. She nodded and followed him up the staircase to the boys' dormitories.

Hermione sat on Harry's bed as he pulled the hangings closed around them. Hermione noticed that Dean and Seamus were already in their beds and cast a silencing spell. Harry looked at her quizzically and she simply pointed in their direction. Harry nodded, and then looked down at his robes, twisting his fingers in them.

Something is really bothering him, Hermione thought, I hope it wasn't me.

She took his hand again, and began to speak. "Harry....it's good to talk."

He nodded and smiled weakly at her again, "I've been thinking," Harry began, "...about Sirius."

"Ohh." Hermione said, feeling rather embarrassed, though she didn't know why.

"I keep looking at the fire in the common room, and wishing that, just once, his head would appear. You know....like in fifth year." Hermione nodded, she remembered the ordeal with Sirius quite vividly.

Sirius had still been hiding from the Ministry, those dolts, who thought that it wasn't possible that Lord Voldemort had returned to power. Fudge had been too worried that he might lose his job to Dumbledore to see all the signs. And now that it had been proved Fudge just might lose his job. And that made everyone quite happy. Basically Sirius had wanted desperately to talk to Harry, even if that meant risking being caught. The Hogwarts fires were being monitored at that time because Umbridge was afraid of students trying to contact people like....well, people like Sirius. During a conversation of Harry's with Sirius, Umbridge's hand appeared in the fire, evidently trying to grab hold of his head. Sirius had gotten away, barely.

"He was the only family I had, Hermione." Hermione opened her mouth to protest, "And don't even say the Dursleys." Harry added.

Hermione smiled. "I wasn't. I was going to say that you have me. And Ron. And all the Weasleys. Even Lupin and Tonks. Everyone in the Order, Harry. We're your family. I thought you knew that."

"I do know that, Hermione. But that does change the fact that Sirius is....is....gone." Harry said. It seemed to Hermione that he was just starting to accept the fact that Sirius was gone. She was happy for the realization, yet felt bad for Harry.

Hermione hugged him as he spoke again. Reliving his favorite memories of Sirius, and the time they spent together. Hermione to shared her favorite moments, and told Harry of her fears, though she spoke nothing of the incident with Malfoy.

They talked for hours and hardly noticed when Ron and Neville came up to bed around one. Hermione didn't look at her watch until around three when sleep had begun to set in for both Hermione and Harry.

"Three o'clock! Oh that's brilliant. And we have potions first thing tomorrow...today rather." Hermione said.

"Snape will be so pleased when I fall asleep in my Shrinking Potion." Harry replied.

Hermione sat silently, evidently thinking. Harry thought for a second. "Oh, Hermione. There's no way you can get away with breaking curfew, it's bloody three o'clock."

"Ohh. You're right, some example I'd be. Head Girl gets caught walking the corridors at three o'clock in the morning on her second day back." Hermione replied, "What should I do, Harry?"

"Look, why don't you just stay here?"

Hermione looked at him doubtfully. "I don't know, Harry. It doesn't seem like a good idea."

"Nothing is going to happen. And you're not going to get into trouble. I promise."

Reluctantly Hermione agreed. She took off her robes and hung them on the bedpost as Harry did the same. Hermione had a blouse and her school skirt on underneath. She slipped off her shoes, which remarkably she still had on after all this time.

Harry had on dark slacks. And a black long sleeve shirt, which he took off after checking with Hermione. They both slid into Harry's bed, careful to keep distance between them. After all, they'd really hate for Ron to open the hangings. And if Parvati or Lavender found out anything about this it'd be around school before Harry or Hermione could say 'quidditch'.

Both Harry and Hermione drifted off into an uneasy sleep, Harry's mind on Sirius (and on Hermione) while Hermione's thoughts drifted back towards Malfoy and the incident earlier.