Chapter Ten

Refusal

My days assumed a routine, a welcome change from my former state, now a world away, of constant loose ends. I woke early, breakfasted, and sought out Boromir. He would put me through my paces with staff and sword, and after the lesson we would converse, or simply sit together in companionable silence. I often wandered alone after this, or lay in thought, before making my pilgrimage to the Great Tree. My evenings were spent with the Lady, learning lore, and a great many other things, as well.

I often encountered members of the Fellowship. The hobbits were a constant delight, and surprisingly easy to talk to. Aragorn and I reached tacit speaking terms, which I regarded as a great accomplishment on my part. Legolas was often gone, taking Gimli the Dwarf with him, but I came to recognize them, as well.

Three weeks had passed, or more, for time in Lorien was a strange thing, and I could not be sure of my count. At dusk one day I climbed the royal mallorn, something I now accomplished with ease. The sentries barely nodded at me, and I reached the Lady's receiving room in record time.

She was waiting for me, as always, but her aura was changed. I could not put my finger on the difference until she spoke. Galadriel's voice had an air of finality as she asked me about the activities of the day. I summarized absently, waiting.

Boromir had said I might move on to aggressive, one-handed staff tactics, and showed me several feint-block combinations which we had practiced until I was unable to lift my arms. Sitting beside him afterwards, I had actually fallen asleep. Boromir was gone when I woke, which made me oddly sad, but I did not speak of this.

When I finished, Galadriel nodded. "That is well, for I do not think you are much longer for this land, child."

It took me a moment to register what she had said, and a moment more to form a coherent reply. "You cannot send me back, lady."

She answered me with a cryptic smile. "Indeed, but you may go."

Slow again on the uptake, I understood her double meaning finally and bowed my way out, nearly falling several times in my haste to get down the ladder.

Under the pale light of a sliver of moon, Lorien glowed faintly, dark and mysterious. I set off, stalking aimlessly, fists clenched, seething to myself. How dare she try to send me back when I hadn't even done anything? I simply would not go.

Directing my steps past the Fellowship's pavilion, I counted seven slumbering male bodies, all snoring to some degree or another. The one I looked for, however, was not there. I sighed and went in search of Boromir.

In truth, he found me, for I would have walked right past him, seated as he was in the shadows, if he had not called out to me, "Firiel?"

I turned. "On your attendance, my lord, here." It had become a catchphrase, since my saying it made him smile.

Boromir lifted his chin to get me to come closer. I saw that his sword was out and that one hand held a polishing cloth. "What troubles your sleep this night?"

I flung myself down near him. "I might ask the same of you, lord. But to answer you, the Lady Galadriel would send me away from Lorien, and I have no true home but this land, now."

Busy focusing on the blade, he did not look at me. "Do as she says, Firiel. She wishes only to keep you safe," he said, rubbing at an invisible speck of rust.

"Will everyone send me away?" I exclaimed. "Am I a child, that I must hide at the first sign of danger?"

"Yes." Boromir sighted down the length of the tang, still not looking at me.

"How many years have you?" I demanded, in an attempt to prove my point.

"Two score and one," came the reply, devoid of emotion.

I took a mental step back. This man, who appeared in his late twenties, was old enough to be my father. I changed tactics. "Am I not bound to you, lord, as your esquire?"

Boromir sheathed his blade, saying, "You have sworn no oath of service, neither to me nor Gondor."

"But I would so swear, lord." I was in earnest, with a side motive of wanting desperately to stay in Middle Earth.

He gave me a look, as if to say, "Nice try", and a bit of me died. "I will hear no oath from you." At this, the rest of my heart crumpled.

"Then let me journey with you on your quest," I pleaded.

"That would require the vote of the entire company, and I do not believe they will give it to you." He paused. "Besides, did I not hear you say that you would not leave this land?"

"Only by your side, lord," I admitted.

Boromir stood. "Then you will have your wish, and remain in Lorien."

I scowled into the trees, hearing him stump off.