"Good night Stewie," said Lois "and don't let the bed bugs bite."
"Oh I'm watching you." Stewie said as he looked under his sheets. Within a few seconds Stewie was asleep in his crib dreaming of sugar plums dancing in his head. Well actually the sugar plums were being hung and burned in front the public.
In the mourning the family all went to the table to eat breakfast, except for Peter for he was still at the drunken clam. "Hello my little angle. How was your dream?" said Lois directing it to Stewie.
"First it "Devil" or "Supreme ruler" but never "Angle" and second, what's it to you punk? What are you? Some kind of stalker?" Stewie replied while standing up and walking on the table. Stewie than sat back down into his high chair and began to talk to himself about something along the lines of world domination and spontaneous combustion.
Once the whole family was out of the house Stewie gathered up all the pillows in the house and started to make a fort. Once Stewie finished the fort he started to walk back and forth in front of his stuffed animals named Rupert. "Well well comrade. I see you have begun to gather soldiers at the coast of the living room. Eh? This means war!" Stewie yelled. He then dove through the air, grabbed a pillow and threw it at Rupert. The animal fell over, the war was won. "Oh I have to stop doing this" he said "Come on now. I mean I'm two years old. I'm practically ninety then. I'm getting way to old for this."
Stewie then walked outside and started to head toward the wharf. Once he got there I noticed a pirate ship. Out of nowhere he pulled out an eye-patch out of his pocket and walked to on of the ship mates. "Hello there me lad. Sihber me tibers. Is that really a sword? I mean um abast ye land lovers."
"Dude like no one talks like that anymore." said the pirate who had a joint of weed in his mouth "Go and play with like the clowns or something."
Stewie then walked back home, but when he did he had blood stains and what seemed like the hand of the stoner pirate in a bag. He the tossed the bag into the garbage disposal and walked into Peter's room. "God damnmit." he yelled. Why isn't she dead yet, for he was referring to Lois. "Maybe the traps didn't work?" he said. Stewie then pulled out a stick and started to poke all over the bed. In a few seconds a set a spikes came from under the bed and stabbed where Lois slept. "Well that one works." he said.
Next he brought out his laser gun and shot the mirror. The bullet then bounced of the mirror and hit a switch which triggered an ax to fall over the toilet. "I wonder why she still hasn't died God damnmit." Stewie yelled. Then he opened the closet door. Once he did a ray gun shot above his head. "Well they all work." he said to himself.
For the next hour or so Stewie slept, ate, and peed on everything to blame on Brian. Stewie walked into his room, hit a random button, and fell into a pit. He then landed in a soft chair. Stewie was in a damp, dark cave. There was a map of the world and all the countries with nuclear missiles and such weapons of mass destruction. "Eny, meany, miny, moe!" Stewie yelled as he pointed to a random country. He then hit a switch which sent an atomic bomb…to that country. Stewie then walked about and tested all the weapons in his arsenal at a dummy that resembled Lois. Then he walked into his teleportation device and appeared in an open field. "Now I want all of you to die in the name of Comrade Stewie! Do you understand?" Stewie yelled at the nothingness in the field.
All the sudden a thousand soldiers appeared out of nowhere and yelled "Sir yes sir!"
"Good, very good. No attack!" within a second of him saying those words all the soldiers were over a hill and the sound of gun fire suddenly filled the air. Stewie then teleported back to his lab and said "Another country destroyed."
"I'm home" yelled Lois. Stewie then ran up a flight of stairs and stood stood in front of the refrigerator as if nothing had happened. "How are was your day my little angle?" she asked.
"It's devil. God damnmit don't you learn anything woman?" Stewie yelled. He then continued his day as though nothing had happened.