Author's Note: This is an important chapter in the story - there is a lot of background information, specifically about Mary and George's arguement, Wendy Darling and what she has been up and more intimate foreshadowing of Baby Jane given. Again, things that don't seem to make sense now, will later...
My Darling Love
Chapter 50 – Night of the Around Table
"Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear, but around in awareness."
-James Thurber
George fell asleep holding Jane in his arms, and neither stirred from their blissful slumber when Mary lit the lamp and touched their heads gently. The boys were also lost in the dream world, and holding true to the saying, "never wake a sleeping child," Mary walked to midnight mass alone. The other members of her family were also absent, too busy making merry at John's flat to check the time; they left Mary all alone in church. It was a celebratory mass, commemorating the birth of Son of God, and Mary could not imagine there being a more important event, nor could she imagine being too busy with anything else to have missed it. And so, she sat nearest the back away from other families that filled the pews. Mothers and fathers with their children and grandchildren in tow flowed in and took their places, as those without the good fortune to be loved by any one in the world sat by themselves in the seats surrounding Mary.
The service began, as it always did, with a children's pageant. Older children, volunteering to reenact the blessed night when Christ was born, slowly walked up the aisle. There were angels carrying stars, and then the Shepherds behind them, three wise men, and, last but not least, the Blessed Virgin Mary and Saint Joseph carrying a little baby they gently laid in the manager up front. The choir sang, the priest said his prayers, and the congregation thanked the Lord for his blessing. It only took an hour, as God only seemed to ever ask for just one hour a week or on special occasions, and then it was finished. "Go forth to love and serve the Lord and your neighbor." The priest dispatched his loyal followers and every one in attendance went forth to love and serve the Lord for the rest of the night.
Well, almost everyone. Mary stayed behind long after the candles lining the aisle was snuffed by the altar boys, and the gathered groups of happy families were gone home to their celebrations. Mary knelt throughout the entire service, and for an hour afterwards, saying her rosary in silent prayer. Now that it was well after two in the morning, she sat on the pew and looked about.
With the rich and proper of polite society gone, the poor and destitute made their way in and took spots randomly throughout the empty church to warm themselves and to pray. Mary Elizabeth Darling was the best dressed, even if her gown and coat were almost a decade old. Her hair was placed perfectly atop her head, and she wore a touch of cosmetic to cover the inevitable years that showed on her face. Those who kept her company dressed in their best rags, with greasy faces and hair. Most had no rosaries, so they prayed counting their fingertips. She rested, sitting back in the pew, and looked directly ahead to the altar, and all the gleaming candlelight that poured down and filled the church. It was her favorite time of the year, and she did look forward to it, no matter what the season. This is why everyone all around the world loves Christmas.
At a moment in her peace when she preferred to be alone in her own mind, she discovered a visitor who took his seat behind her and leaned over to her ear to give her notice of his presence, "Mary Elizabeth Baker, all by yourself on Christmas. Who would have ever guessed?"
The voice sent a chill from her toes to her hairline. Mary did not need to turn around to see who spoke to her, for she recognized the voice, as it too had haunted her dreams. "That's Mrs. George Darling to you," she retorted, looking over to her left to the man that had kept her company the entire night, only a few places away.
"No, you see Miss Baker, if it is not my name, then you are just better off keeping your maiden name, for it is undeserving...." The man coughed and hacked, and attempted to continue speaking through the ache he had in his throat.
"So am I to understand my husband is undeserving of his name?" Although she did not give him her eyes, she knew he was kneeling with his head lowered to the pew. "No, Miss Baker, from what I heard your husband finally earned his name. It is he who is undeserving of..." He erupted into his handkerchief again, wheezing and gagging.
The man continued to cough and spew, as an annoyed Mary sighed impatiently and cast her eyes back again and repeated the same to her companion. "It seems to me if I would have received your name, I would be a widow before the New Year is even upon us -- or sooner, if we are fortunate."
The man panted, catching his breath, and composed himself, falling back into the pew, making a loud creak, which silenced those, praying around him for a moment. "Just a nasty bout of the flu, I'll be fine... Where is my baby brother anyway? Not like him to miss a chance to show off his beautiful wife and children?"
Peter Darling now coughed an enormous amount of phlegm from his throat and lungs, and then spit it out onto the floor nearest where he sat. Vagabonds from the streets, who sat closest to him, only hiding in the church for warm shelter with no intention of saying a rosary or asking for blessings, got up and left at his foul desecration. Captain Hook, sitting at the end of the row Mary occupied, hooded in black, shook his head and made the sign of the cross over his chest as did Mary in unison.
Peter now leaned over and touched Mary's shoulder. As he did, Captain Hook turned his head to give warning to the unsuspecting assailant, returning his gaze forward once more as Peter removed his hand from her. "Just answer me something, Miss Baker, and then I'll leave you alone," he remarked.
"Forever?" Mary countered to the old man sitting alone behind her laughing and coughing his heart out inside God's House.
"Tonight and maybe tomorrow," he replied as Mary nodded her head eager to accommodate his request, wanting him to leave. "Do you think George beat you the way he did because he was angry that you tricked him into another baby, or that you trapped him by having another baby? I'd bet my pocket money you trapped him to keep him, at least that's my guess."
Mary finally turned to gaze upon the desecration of man Peter had transformed into, bald now except for a patch of white on top. Time and events had not been good to Peter, his teeth were rotted - most blackened, the rest missing. His face, hands and what could be assumed the rest of his body was covered in sores, open and infected. Deep dark lines showed on his face as well as a nasty scar, a large gash that has been stitched horribly by an incompetent physician, running from his forehead well past his chin and neck. "Tricked? Trapped? I have no idea what you are talking about, Peter."
"I think you do, Mary Elizabeth Baker. Come on, not like good old George to not want to stick it in you all the time, that must have been your first clue as a newlywed..." He cackled as he spoke, and began coughing again, this time falling over on his side. He emitted a pained moan, as if the constant hacking left him in agony. As he spit into his handkerchief, Mary caught sight of the blood and slimy tissue polluted with whatever made him sick. "What did he tell you, he didn't want to bother you after you had such a hard time birthing that baby girl? He's not even a good liar! You knew he was leaving you. You knew he was about to give up and go home to his mommy. My little baby brother George had everything worked out, he always enjoyed manipulating the numbers. He paid off your parents so they would take you and that baby girl in, and my parents so they would take him back. He arranged everything nice and neat in a little package and mailed it off. He was going to support you and what's her name, until your mother and Auntie Millie could marry you off to someone else, someone else who had more money, a better profession, someone worthy of you, but with the same name, quietly, as not to cause a scandal. And who did you think that was? Could it have been me?"
Mary lowered her head and clutched her rosary. Captain Hook slid himself tentatively down further to the end of the pew away from Mary, rising up and taking his leave. Mary glanced up to see him go, and he blew her a kiss to ensure her of his speedy return. "I hate my mother, that wicked bitch," Peter sneered, kneeling again to sit against the pew behind Mary. He reeked of liquor, tobacco, urine, body odor, and the filthy streets he lay in at night. "'George can't move back in here, we've rented his room out, he'd best buy himself a house and then he can stay there and only visit with us for dinner and such ...' 'When George gets ordained as a priest, the bishop will be impressed when he donates the house to the church ...' 'Peter, you should move Mary by herself in to your home, leave that baby with her parents, you don't want George's bastard around your own children ...' 'Mr. and Mrs. Baker always wanted another baby, and they can raise it as their own, no one will remember that George ever fathered a baby...' " Peter droned on doing his best Mrs. Frederick Darling impression with a haughty over-exaggerated high-pitched squeak.
"You know, Mary, what my mother really wanted to do was kill your baby girl, erase her from existence. She had already asked me to arrange it, you know, have someone...someone, Mary, who could snatch her from the park or your flat...well, you can imagine what would come next... George would surely get promoted to pope quicker when people learned he had fathered a baby that was murdered, and then, overcome with grief and guilt over his sins, devoted his life to God. You have me the thank that you having your precious little angel murdered didn't happen. Me and only me, Mary Elizabeth Baker..."
Mary sat up suddenly in her seat, she moved to rise, but Peter caught her hand as she used the back of the pew for leverage. "Hit a nerve there did I?" He smiled ear to ear before regaining his ragged breathing and wheezing. "I was this close to being your husband," he showed her with his free hand how close he was putting forward his grimy thumb and forefinger together so closely they were one. "And the best part was -- it was George's idea, totally his own without any help from me. Ha, he thanked me when I accepted his offer to take you off his hands; he acted as if I was doing him a favor. But you wouldn't let George go, you hate to lose, and your own husband was about to betray you. He bought the house and you were just waiting for him to pack you and that little baby up and say, 'best move back in with your parents, my Darling Love, only for a little while.' You knew he was going to run away and go off to God like his mommy wanted to start his life over.
"You see, sweetheart," Peter now tightened his grip on Mary using both hands and squeezing down hard, "George was too much of a coward to fight for you and your child. He was scared out of his mind being a husband and a father. He hated it, Mary. 'Best I become a priest like mother wants, I'm no good at being a provider for a wife and child,' were his own words. You might be very experienced in confronting and conquering evils, but my baby brother would just as well have surrendered and run with his tail between his legs."
Peter would not let go of Mary's hand as she struggled so she hit him with her handbag, and began screaming for help. "George was going to feed you to the lion, Mary, and you found out. How did you find out, I always wondered? Won't you please tell me? A last request for a dying man, please!" Peter cried out as the constable assigned to watch over the church on Christmas, as it was open all hours of the day and night for parishioners, dragged him away kicking and screaming.
"Your mistress told me."
Peter let his legs fall out from underneath him and gave the constable no further scuffle. "Penny was no mistress, Miss Baker, me having to pay her husband for it makes her a whore."
Mary was enraged, Peter soiling the name of her best friend, not to mention a dead woman in the ground, unable to speak in her own defense. She wasted no time in taking after him with her fists clenched.
"Do not to beat him any closer to death, Madam, what would God think?" Captain Hook offered as she ran into him, a brick wall in her path to Peter. Her brother-in-law still cried out to her, imitating his mother, as he was loaded in the paddy wagon, "Peter dear, you can't marry her now that my idiot son put another baby in her. One unwanted burden of fatherhood the church can look past, but two keeps him trapped in hell..."
"Say it isn't so, Madam," Captain Hook joked, as Mary, still in his embrace pushed back and sneered, "Shut up."
She began quickly walking home alone in the middle of the night, Captain Hook strolling behind her, humming a few bars of Cinderella. "I think I shall have to think up a new song for you now, Madam. May be something to honor the wicked fairy in Sleeping Beauty, you know -- the one that cursed the fair maiden into snoring away one hundred years of her life."
Mary did not think his taunting was funny; she stopped in her tracks, and whirled about to him. But before she could give voice, he offered his instead, "I must know Madam, was it a trick or was it a trap to keep your king?" Captain Hook crossed his arms, unaffected by her furious expression.
"Maybe, just maybe Captain, a little bit of both. But not the way you are thinking and far from the falsehoods Prince Peter the imposter weaves. It's a very lovely story. I'll have to tell you sometime, remind me again, won't you?"
It had begun to snow and the walks as well as the streets were already covered in it. Captain Hook hated the cold, and the snow even more; he reaffixed his hood on his head and bowed to her. "Happy Christmas, Madam." Off into the fog that descended down onto them he went.
Mary walked home faster than she normally would have from church in the weather. She was all by herself, and the fact that it was well past three in the morning contributed to her reasoning that it was wisest to be in the safety of her home. Without trouble from others out on the street this late at night, with the exceptions of a few mumbled apologies by drunk gentleman stumbling home themselves, Mary made it in her door, out of breath and cold to the bone, soaking wet.
Harry greeted her and helped her take her coat off. "Tea to warm you in the kitchen, Mary," Harry said, after extending his apologizes for missing mass.
"Don't say you are sorry to me, that's between you and God, good man," Mary replied as she now strode into her kitchen.
John sat at the kitchen table, as did Captain Hook already in her house, waiting. Mary let out a groan of irritation, not for her son but for the constant bother of a pirate captain that seemed to follow her around endlessly, demanding her attention.
"I'm sorry, Mother, if you want me to leave I will."
John began to rise, but Mary lovingly placed her hands to his face and kissed his cheek. "No John, not you. It's just teacups half full of cold tea left on the table seems to have become a normal annoyance in this house." The teacup was full and hot, for Harry had just poured it for himself before Mary walked in the door. It made no difference to Mary, who lifted the saucer and purposely dropped the cup resting upon it into the lap of Captain Hook.
He kicked back from his chair, just in time to avoid most of it. John stared at the chair that had just moved by itself with wonder and amazement. He ran his hand over the seat and gazed underneath the chair for some hint of an explanation. Captain Hook watched John as his hand was in his lap, and then moved his legs out of the way to give John an easier time looking underneath. Mary paid neither any mind, setting the teacup (which did not break when it hit the floor, having been cushioned by her unseen guest's boot) and the saucer into the sink. "What is this man doing?" Captain Hook asked to Mary who ignored him and sat down opposite of the two.
"John," she said, to regain his attention away from the empty chair, she folded her hands in front of her and leaned toward her favorite son. He looked at her only for a moment before advising Harry against sitting in the chair capable of moving on its own accord.
Harry mumbled something about "rubbish" and took the chair anyway. An infuriated Captain Hook, who preferred lovely young ladies with ample fannies on his lap and not middle-aged gentlemen who stank of pipe tobacco, expelled him to the floor.
"See, I told you," John said as he helped his uncle to his feet and assisted him to another chair.
Mary still watched her son, and nothing else going on around the room, including Captain Hook cleaning his fingernails with the tip of his hook. "John, tell me about Neverland and Peter Pan."
John was momentarily baffled by her request. He raised his eyes to the ceiling, thinking very hard over her question. "I'm sorry, Mother, is that one of the children's fairy tales? I'm not certain I remember one by that name. What was it about?"
Mary stared at him. "It's the one about Captain Hook." Hearing his name, the good Captain turned his head with an inquisitive face to John who responded, "Captain whom?"
"Hook, she said Captain Hook," the man himself answered, waving his hook that replaced his right hand only an inch from John's unmarked face.
"He was a pirate, John." Mary went on.
"Pirate captain, Madam,' Captain Hook corrected.
"Oh yes, of course, how impolite of me, I am very sorry, a pirate captain, John. He is a pirate captain."
John and Harry looked to one another, more to question whom Mary was apologizing to than the question itself. "Mother, the children don't like stories about pirates and scary things like that," John said uncomfortably.
Captain Hook stood from his chair with such force; it flew back and hit the wall behind it, a few feet away. Harry and John were both on their feet staring at the chair, afraid to go near it. Mary now watched Captain Hook, who had risen to his full height and stood enraged that the Darling children thought pirates were something to be feared. "Pirates are not scary!" Captain Hook declared to the entire room.
Mary shook her head and tried to contain a small giggle that erupted, inspired by the great Captain Hook preening himself, pulling down his jacket coat and quickly searching for his sword, which he had left behind onboard his ship.
"Mary, what are you looking at, is there someone out the window?" Harry moved to the kitchen window and looked outside, finding nothing but snow and no tracked footprints below, he turned to find Mary still watching Captain Hook, his head raised with pride. "Pirates are misunderstood by most men. We are very nice people, with friendly dispositions, that is, once you take the time to get to know us."
Mary had to laugh at that comment, so she did. Harry began waving his hands through Captain Hook, "Is there something here in the room, Mary, what is it."
Captain Hook smiled at Mary with a raised brow, pointing her attention to John, who now saw the same thing she was seeing, a pirate captain in his full regalia, sans hat and sheathed sword, standing in the Darling kitchen. John shoved back in his chair and stood shaking uncontrollably trying to speak. All he could weakly manage was "Mother..." before he held his hand to his chest and fainted.
Mary was at his side in a moment, "I think he's fainted, Harry," she said waving a napkin over his face. She looked up to Captain Hook, who had retaken his seat and was sipping from her teacup. "Did he see you?" Mary asked to thin air and Harry watched her head's direction in wonder.
"I didn't hit him, Mary," Harry explained trying to make sense of her odd behavior.
"Yes Madam. Indeed he did."
"Why did he faint?" Mary asked, looking back and forth to Captain Hook and Harry to make her question to the pirate captain sitting in her kitchen less obvious. Harry stood shaking his head; "Maybe he fell unconscious because it is very warm in the kitchen." He shrugged, showing he really was as oblivious to the reason as she.
John came to only moments later, and rubbed the back of his head, "Are you alright, John?" Mary asked, helping him to his feet with Harry's aid. John looked back to where Captain Hook sat and shook his head, "It was the strangest thing; I could have sworn I saw this evil man standing in the kitchen dressed like a pirate or something. I felt sick to my stomach and then everything went blank. What were we talking about?"
Captain Hook lowered his head still seated and sighed with a glum face, "So I'm evil, am I..."
Harry ushered John up the stairs, feeling it best he take to his bed and not travel home in his car this late at night.
"He remembered," Captain Hook finally explained to Mary, who was still kneeling on the floor watching her son and brother-in-law head up to bed.
"Remembered what?" Mary was exhausted, and knew it was to be a very long day ahead of her tomorrow as she sat back down at her kitchen table resting her head in her hands.
"Everything, Peter Pan, Captain Hook, Mr. Smee, Princess Tigerlily, the Lost Boys, Tinkerbell, mermaids, pirates, booby traps, the Jolly Roger, sword fights, cannon balls, the whole ruckus it was when he was there last." Mary turned her tired head to him, "And he fainted..." She looked at him, expecting response and reason.
"He passed out, Madam, because he is too old to remember. He is an adult, a full-grown man, with no magic for such things left. When the memory tugs at him now, it makes him sick to his stomach. The force of childhood and imagination it requires to call to mind all that was once so real to him, causes his tiny little brain to shut down and block all those wondrous things out."
"I have been to Neverland, I never faint or get sick," Mary responded, folding her arms in a motherly manner. "That is because you go there not as a child, but as a mother. Creating a child from nothing more than the love she has for a simple man is a miracle. The ability a mother has to bond with and love someone she has never even seen before is a miracle. And you love your children; just because they come from that man you call a husband, Madam. While you carried them they took from you all they needed without asking, and in being born they gave you great pain. And still when your children arrived, and they all expected limitless love and protection, you, and only you, their mother, had it to give first. You did, willingly and without question. And all their lives you will never expect anything from them in return, but that they live on and appreciate the life you gave them. That is a miracle too. It is those miracles when carried within a body that leaves behind something in a woman. That is why you will always remember Neverland, because parts of those miracles remain inside of you forever, and will always bring you there if need be. Now tell me a story."
"George went to Neverland, too," Mary countered, not yet ready to tell her tale.
"On a technicality Madam, call it what you will -- guilt, remorse, fear of losing someone he was this close," he mimicked Peter's hand gesture from church, "to willingly giving up. Fathers only love the part of their children that belongs to themselves, there is no magic or miracle in that. Now tell me a story."
Mary sat back in her chair still holding her arms crossed, she lowered her head down to look into her teacup, empty. Captain Hook took her hint and filled her cup and his also, and then nodded for her to begin.
"Once upon a time, there was a wicked and evil queen who loved her king and was willing to do whatever it took to defend him and save him from his foes. But his foes were more numerous than he could count, and more powerful than he. Try as they might to work together in their crusade, they met defeat under the worst circumstances. A spy working as an aid to the Queen confessed the king was ready to surrender to his archenemy, a horrid, wretched prince from the opposing kingdom. He had already waved his white flag and was to concede the Queen on the first of November. But the sinful and awful Queen had a plan of her own. She tricked her unsuspecting king into creating another heir with the queen. They already had one princess and soon they would have a prince. With a royal family, the king had no choice but to helm the kingdom and sit on the throne he thought he alone had fashioned. Eventually the King found out about the Queen's trick or trap, whichever you prefer, and wanted to hang her, but God told him that vengeance was his and his alone. The end."
"How lovely, Madam, you should write children's novels." Captain Hook grinned swigging his tea down. "The hour is late, I must be off, raping, and pillaging, you know, pirate things your children fear."
He moved to stand but the wicked witch now a queen had another idea. "I know I another story, I promise it is much better. Would you like to hear it?" He nodded, and settled back down in his seat.
"There once was a fair maiden who loved a boy that refused to grow up. Now this fair maiden, had a mother that was a dreadful Queen, the same from my previous story, and that Queen was always plotting and planning the downfall of far away kingdoms, and kept her best ideas and schemes locked away in a secret drawer. You see, this queen wrote everything she had ever accomplished down in a diary and hid it away, out of sight from the king, for if he knew everything she had truly done, he would surely hang her, no matter what God told him. Now, this fair maiden, we will call Gwendolyn, came across the diary one day by accident and spent hours and hours reading over it all. Instead of tattling on her mother, she put the journal to good use, and concocted her own plan to make the boy grow up and love her." Mary smiled to Captain Hook who had put his arms behind his head and placed his feet up on her table.
"Gwendolyn, seeing what she thought was the error of her own mother's ways, went about tricking the boy into love a tad bit differently than the queen. For the king always loved the Queen, and Gwendolyn reasoned that the young boy did love her only he didn't know it yet. So first she had to teach him lesson, what his life would be like without her forever. She felt the best person to help her in her scheme would be the archrival of the young boy. Can you guess who that was?"
Mary raised her brow and Captain Hook intrigued by her candor replied, "A pirate captain?"
"Have you heard this story?" Mary asked as he, still seated, rolled his eyes and shook his head. "I think so, Madam, but won't you please go on."
"Of course, she couldn't tell the pirate captain what she was up to, she is, after all, underhanded in her misdeeds like her mother, so the fair maiden seduced the unwitting pirate captain. Unfortunately it is not a happy tale for him, for he fell victim to her charms, and fell madly in love with her. But she only used him to make the young boy jealous and green eyed with envy. Her plan worked, for soon they, Gwendolyn and the boy who never wanted to grow up, went off together on their own adventures and left the pirate captain old, alone and unloved. I'll have you know the fair maiden and the boy were laughing at the pirate captain when they thought the Queen wasn't listening, and even she thought Gwendolyn was very wicked in her ways, playing games of the heart. Now, don't you think for one moment the pirate captain is a fool!" Mary tapped his hand to gain his attention from the ceiling he was glaring at in anger.
"No Madam, I assure the pirate captain is no fool."
"Of course he isn't, because he is just as wicked, evil, malicious and devious in his plans as the queen, and he sought his revenge. I am sure you are aware every man who wishes to marry a young lady thinks it only right that he be the very first to take her to bed?" Captain Hook nodded, "Well, this is why the Queen herself disapproved of her daughter's actions. The young boy only knew of a courtship, but not a consummation of shared affections and lust between the maiden and the pirate captain. When he found out, he was furious and refused to see her again, ever. She went home to her kingdom, never wanting her parents to discover the lies she was living in. She already knew her mother thought her stupid or silly for playing with men's hearts as she did. Her father was appalled by her soiled virtue. Her only salvation was the pirate captain, and to him she returned. And he was no fool, for he tricked her into sailing away with him, away from her kingdom, away from the boy who would not grow up. But he no longer felt the same about her either, he knew where her heart lay and so he punished her, a final nail in her coffin. He gave her a child, and denied its paternity, leaving the child abandoned in the kingdom with the king and queen..."
"No, you're wrong, Madam. Up until that point where the pirate captain being her salvation you were correct, but after listening to your story beyond that I fear you will not give this happy tale a proper ending. So allow me." Captain Hook glanced to Mary who motioned for him to continue.
"We know the true names of the characters, so I will use them. Wendy returned to Captain Hook and begged his forgiveness, admitting her wrongs against him, and pledging her undying love to him. This love you speak of not being a new emotion to him, he forgave her wholly and they would have lived happily ever after, had it not been for the boy who refused to grow up, his name is Peter Pan. You see, Madam, Peter Pan does have at least one belief I am aware of, and that is just because I don't want something anymore, does not mean you can have it. He bided his time, for as you know, he is far more wicked and evil than any queen or pirate captain, and waited. I did take the fair maiden Gwendolyn away, Madam, and sailed the seven seas, but I never kept her from her kingdom, that was her choice. But eventually Captain Hook, that's me, had to return to Neverland, for those are the rules." As he told his side of the tale, Captain Hook proved he was an expert storyteller himself, making facial expressions complete with grins and raised brows, changing to tones of his voice as the emotion of the sentence required.
"Rules?" Mary asked intrigued.
"Oh yes, Madam, there are rules. There are always rules..." His handsome face fell very serious and his tone grew solemn. They watched one another in silence for moments before he continued. "Peter Pan knew Captain Hook wanted nothing more in the world than to be married to a wife and be called 'father' by children of his own. I'm really quite fond of children I'll have you know, as a matter of fact, if you, Madam, were still able to bring forth life, we would already have a litter." He touched Mary's hand, informing her of a detail she was unaware of, and then went on. "But, the rules I spoke of do not allow it under any circumstances, at least for me. You see, Madam, I have rules that I must obey and Peter Pan has another set of rules he must abide by. Think of us a chess pieces on a board. Now the rules of the game are the same for everybody, but the strategy behind the one who guides us around is quite different. Did I not explain this to you once already?"
Mary nodded her head slowly with a concerned expression and rested her hand on his. "Go on Captain, I did not mean to interrupt you."
"No need to apologize, Madam, I am the one who digressed, where was I? Oh yes, anyway, so there was this ball the king and queen were throwing for their son, the prince, and his intended and the maiden Gwendolyn wanted to go, but Captain Hook could not leave for he had already been gone too long from his post sailing the seven seas. Remember, the rules ... so she arranged that Peter Pan would give her safe escort. And he did, but also he sent word to Captain Hook that the maiden was in trouble, so having no choice, I went to her and broke the rules. Now, I'm just guessing, but I feel that it was a trick by Peter Pan, for no children could ever be conceived in Neverland. So Captain Hook and Wendy made love, and made a child there in the king and queen's kingdom."
"Why can no children be conceived in Neverland?"
"Because there is no essence of time there. It's timeless, that is why I, nor anyone else, trapped there, with the exception of fairies, ever age." he offered to her baffled expression. "So, she returned with child, but could not stay because, not only can a baby not be conceived there, it cannot be carried there also. Peter Pan, and please Madam, do not confuse him as the hero of our story, who had already margically established a grown up life elsewhere, returned there to that place with the fair maiden Wendy, and she gave birth to a little baby girl, she named Jane. After my mother, if you were wondering. She wanted to keep the baby, but Peter Pan could never love her the way she wanted him to with Captain Hook's bastard daughter crawling about, for that baby would always be a constant reminder of whatever it was that drew Wendy to Captain Hook, or so Pan said."
"So she left the baby with her parents, the king and queen, because he asked her to. And still after all you allowed her to return to you?" Mary was taken aback by this revelation and its surprise quite obvious on her face.
"She never returned to me again Madam. The last time I saw her was the day she left Neverland escorted by Peter Pan, with my life blooming inside of her.. After Jane was placed in your care, Peter Pan came back only to brag at what he had accomplished, informing me that Wendy was never to return to Neverland, preferring to stay with him in the real world where they would together go off on their own adventures. He would get to be a 'husband' and maybe even 'father' but I doubt the latter of the two," Captain Hook responded, shocked at the notion Mary had not yet caught on.
"Madam, indulge me in a roundabout manner. Once Wendy left Jane with you, she never returned to Neverland, and she never remembered anything that transpired there, or here, for that matter. The only thing Peter Pan ever told me of Wendy's involvement with our daughter was she didn't want any part of Jane because she was mine. I was nothing more to her then the scoundrel that had apparently raped her and spoiled her virtue. Thankfully, your father intervened on my behalf, and then and only then I was able to see Jane. Had I not sent one of my subordinates to go and get Jane on the first full moon of every month those first few years of her existence, I would have never even seen her at all. And without even my daughter as my salvation, Madam, well you can imagine my suffering. And the rule I broke to rescue the fair maiden Gwendolyn on the night before your son's wedding, and staying later then I meant to, I am to be punished for that as well. Oh yes, my life had just been one joy after another in matters of the heart."
Mary did not know it, but she now had tears running down her face. "That was your punishment? You can't see Jane anymore? Why? If she is your daughter, then you should see her."
Captain Hook lowered his head to the table and rested it there, his tone was full of irritation, offering only, "No, Madam that was is not my punishment. And I don't see Jane anymore because GEORGE DARLING IS HER FATHER, Madam, not I! I have no right to her under God on this earth! I broke every rule, seeing her when it was forbidden, every time Jane ventured near Neverland I was putting her in grave danger. Some risks are not worth the reward."
Mary stood from her chair and hugged him, "You told me yourself, God is merciful, and you should pray to Him to help. Ask Him..."
Captain Hook cut short her suggestion by slamming both his hook and hand down on the table, "I HAVE ASKED HIM, MADAM, personally..."
"And what did He say?" Mary asked stepping quickly back from him.
Captain Hook looked at her intently, not wanting to reveal certain things very personal, especially with God watching. "You know what He said, Madam." His eyes told Mary all she needed to know and she fell silent, but only for a moment.
"What you spoke of, her having to ... There must be another way ... God will not take Jane from me ... you said it yourself, you have no right to her under God on this earth and I am her mother and George is her father ... why are we to be punished as well ..." Captain Hook touched Mary's cheek as he stood to calm her frenzied jabbering.
"There is no one safe from punishment in this situation, Madam, for we all have wronged the ones we love. No one intermingled in this is innocent, and all will suffer for their sins, Madam. You must remember that Jane does not belong to you or George or Wendy or myself. She was stolen from heaven, and, God as merciful as He is, does not like thieves, and those who take what is not theirs to have must be punished, especially when they are not remorseful for their wrongs. But do not worry, Madam, God is swift with his sword."
"You are His sword, for George and I at least?"
Captain Hook smiled lovingly still holding his hand to Mary's cheek guiding his fingertips gently down to her lips. "Not in the way you are thinking. Our situation is something completely different, Madam. I am not here to punish you -- or your king, for that matter."
Captain Hook smiled adoringly at her weary tear soaked face. He touched her lips and leaned his head into hers, "After all this time, you still don't remember me, do you? Well, I guess what they say it true Madam, with God all things are possible."
Captain Hook stepped away and crossed his arms, giving Mrs. Darling a fiercely serious face. Mary shook her head frantically in response, "No, when my children were lost, that is when we first met, and you hated me." Mary sat back down in her chair, crying hysterically still shaking her head.
"Well, at the time of which you speak, I had to hate you, for that is what you needed. Madam, do you not remember your dreams? You've seen me, Madam. Ask me of George and how he literally fell into your lap, well, that explanation is easy, you see me in your husband's likeness, because God made him that way. You said it yourself, you love the part of me that is your husband. That is because he was my replacement to you. You always question the magic of Neverland. Desire no further proof of its mysteries, we have met before, you just don't remember, and not the time when your children were lost!" Captain Hook's voice was becoming enraged with her deaf ears, and now he ranted on with unforgiving menace is his voice.
"George is his father's son, had you not interceded, nay, say if God were without foresight into the future, your husband would have died of smallpox when he was four years old. His mother thought him blessed for surviving, that is why she wanted him to become a priest and made it her life's work to see it so. Had you not needed him, had you not run away when you were a young woman into the night sky with the boy who will not grow up, George would have been the mirror image of the father you saw this very evening at supper. He would have become a man that works as a loan collector, who beats his wife and whom his children fear. It is all there in his heart, Madam, latent, undisturbed. At times in your life, you have unknowingly awoken the sleeping evils that dwell in him, in his blood. There are two Georges, Madam, which do not intermingle together well. It is either one or the other, for both cannot live at the same time. That is why he beat you. That is why he committed adultery. That is why at times you are afraid of him. But fear not, for soon he will defeat those evils within him without any help from anyone but himself as he has to, to conquer them, finally."
"Jane does not remember you. She is real, you have no right to her. God would not have let her be born only to use her punishment," Mary replied, breathless, trying to compose herself, as Captain Hook gave a silent reply with his eyes.
"She is my daughter, by all rights she is still mine, but not in this world in which she exists. Did you not notice that after your father died she changed in subtle ways? She is no longer 'divine" as most called her. Both you and your husband scoffed it off that it was the influence of John's children, but it was not. The night I made love to your daughter here in your kingdom I gave Wendy the stairway to heaven, and she found an open window to rob out of. And she did, she took Jane, an angel that was to come to her at much later date. When your father died, Madam, God closed that window. The magic that is mine that she has within her heart has faded in my absence, but it is still there. It does not matter that she does not remember me, although she will. Nothing will ever change the fact that she is cast in my shadow that will follow faithfully behind her, her entire life. Which, Madam, as I have informed both you and your husband will not be for much longer. And Madam, you must remember, we punished through our children...Jane will serve as God's sword, not only for your husband and yourself, but for Wendy and I also. With one swift thrust of the blade, he will cut from all of us, our hearts..."
Mary's head fell hard on the table with all the over whelming information she had prayed to God for. He must like Mary, for whenever she asked Him for a favor, He obliged. The first light of dawn had made its way through the window as Captain Hook let out a rather deep and sorrowful sigh. "How did you know my husband's name? You never spoke it before." Mary's muffled voice reflected from the table her lips were flattened to.
"I just assumed that was your husband's name, Madam. That is what you always insist on calling me whenever we make love."
"I never speak a name Captain."
No Madam, not with your tongue – but, with your heart."
"What is your first name captain?"
"It's James, Madam, but you don't have to call me by it. I am aware you are not fond of that name."