DIS: Welcome everyone to the YuGiOh Halloween fic. If I am correct, I believe my other Halloween fic was deleted, so I decided to make a new one for the year of 2004! (smile) Yeah, but anyways, I'll probably be holding off my other fics so that I can keep this one going and finish it before it's December or November (X.X) I want to make a Thanksgiving one-shot or fic, but...(shrugs) Anyway, I guess you want to read this now and not listen to me talking about pointless things, huh? () Ok, here is the fic. Oh and please read below.
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Title: The YuGiOh Halloween Fic: 2004!
Genre: Humor/Horror
Rating: R for content and some perverted humor ()
Summary: It's another Halloween with evil masks, evil costumes and—OO Evil mansions? Yes! It's once again another demented fic with such weird humor and pairings you might hide from them! Please R&R!
Disclaimer: I do not own YuGiOh, but I do own this plot, mwahahaha!
Notes/Warnings: Pervertedness, some parts that are full of suspense and horror! Yaoi and some hints of yuri.
Pairings:
Atemu/Shizuka
Anzu/Marik (since it was Bakura/Anzu last year)
Jou/Mai (predictable)
Otogi/Honda (o.O)
Enjoy!
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Chapter One, What costume shall I wear?
It was day like every other, leaves falling, ghost stories being told, Jou eating everyone's lunch and Marik cursing the world in Arabic. Yeah, it's definitely a day like all the other ones.
Mai was currently eating her lunch comfortable. A salad, with low-fat dressing. So that's how she can fit into those skimpy outfits!
Anzu was grinning madly as Mai ate.
"(-.-) (yawns briefly)"
"Psst!" Anzu whispered to Mai.
"What?" Mai responded in a whisper. Shizuka looked over and raised an eyebrow.
"I lowered my cholesterol!" Shizuka blinked.
"That is great hun! So did I!"
"(X.X) No fair..." Shizuka said, sniffing.
"Man, this bites! I can barely stay awake!" Honda complained to his boyfriend, Otogi. Malik looked thoughtfully over at where the coffee was. He went and got the coffee pot.
"Coffee, Honda?" Malik said innocently. Malik opened the pot and the coffee shot into Honda's cup.
"(O.O) Uh..."
"It's a little strong!" Malik said, snickering with Bakura.
"(O.O''') It's winking at me!!" Malik and Bakura turned to the coffee. It stopped winking before they could even see it.
"I think he's gotten into my stash again." Bakura mumbled to Malik. Malik nodded giving weird looks Honda's way.
"Or maybe you two just put some in the coffee!" Otogi exploded.
"Oh yeah, that'd be rich." Malik and Bakura said with sarcasm.
"If you ever dare to harm my boyfriend I'm gonna kick you in the bagina!"
"(O.o) Did he just say...bagina?" Marik said, hearing Otogi's outburst.
"(OO) I think he did." Malik said, staring at him. "He doesn't even know how to pronounce the woman's sex organ...He really is gay." The 3 yami's nodded, staring at the bewildered dice-boy.
"Uh, you guys?" Ryou squeaked out.
"Yeah?"
"The bell rang."
"Oh...ALRIGHT!"-
Marik sat down and sighed contently. He switched the TV on.
Later
Marik stared at the TV, his eyebrow twitching.
"Slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap"
Marik's eyes narrowed and an anime vein was popping out.
"Slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap, slap"
"Grr..." Marik was gripping the couch's arm, fuming.
"Ninja Wussies will return in a moment!"
"Where the hell is the remote?!" Marik found it.
"We'll be right back, so don't touch that remote!" The TV man said. Marik rolled his eyes and right when he was about to turn the channel—"Hey! Hey! Hey! HEY! HEY!!" Marik froze, his eyes wide. He looked around him and back at the TV. "I said "Don't touch that remote"! WHAT ARE YOU, RETARDED?! NOW SIT YOU ASS BACK DOWN!"
"(O.O)" Marik sat back in the chair. "Talk about ratings through intimidation." He mumbled and stared at the TV in horror.
Later...AGAIN
"Stay tuned! Coming up next is some mindless drivel guaranteed to insult your intellect!"
"Hey Malik, your show is on!" Marik called to Malik, smirking. Malik, who was in the kitchen twitched and mumbled, "Ha, ha..."
The commercial was over in a bit and something knew came on.
"I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I MUST KISS YOU!"
Marik sweat dropped and sighed.
"Kiss! Kiss! Smooch! Kiss! Kiss!" Marik yawned and his ears perked. "Oh, baby, baby!"
"(O.o) Odd car commercial..." Malik mumbled, coming in.
"No kidding." Marik said, tilting his head to the side.
-
Anzu smiled and walked into her kitchen.
"Hey Mai! Want some toast?"
"Sure hun! Hey, we should go looking for some costumes, don't you agree?"
"Don't worry, after we eat something we will." Anzu took out some bread and looked curiously at the toaster. "I wonder if dad fixed the toaster?"
Click.
The bread shot up.
KA-CHOING!
PWING!
PWANG!
"YAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!" Mai ran from the bread that was shooting everywhere.
CRASH!
PWING!
PWANG!
"YIPE!" Anzu's puppy came shooting from no where.
CRAAASHH!!
"(-.-) Yup..." Anzu came from hiding.
"ANZU! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT? "THE BREAD FROM HELL?"" Mai asked, storming in.
"Umm...wanna go look for costumes?" Anzu asked innocently.
-
Marik came in, glaring behind him.
"Damn TV..."
"Hey! There's a toy in every box of this cereal!" Malik exclaimed, reading the back of the box.
"So?" Marik said carelessly. Malik poured the cereal, but instead a huge robot came out.
"(O.o) Where's...?"
"Milk?" Marik said, smirking and holding a carton of milk.
"Oh shut the hell up, Marik." Malik grumbled.
-
"(z.z) I'm tired..." Honda said, following Otogi around the mall. Otogi turned.
"I'm Otogi. You look like Honda, Tired." Otogi said smartly.
"Shut up." Honda mumbled.
"Ok, listen. We need to find a place where thongs are." Otogi and Honda looked around.
"THERE!"
They both pointed at Victoria's Secrets and stalked in like they were women.
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Knock, knock!
"I'll get it." Malik said and walked to the door.
Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock, CRASH!
Malik ran to see his door broken down. Bakura was standing there, silent.
"You're not very patient are you?" Malik said, frowning.
"Not when I have to wait." Bakura pointed out.
"Humph, well, come on." They went in the kitchen where Marik was trying to make the robot to his chores.
"YOU STUPID ROBOT!" Marik roared. "You take the broom—which is this—and sweep—like this! GOT IT?""ABUDABU."
"What the fuck does that mean? GODDAMMIT, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!"
"ABUDABU!!!!" The robot ran—er...raced?—around the house from Marik.
"Umm...The robot came out of the cereal." Malik said. "Well, the box."
"Uh, right. So are you guys going to come to get a costume or what?"
"Oh yeah! I forgot! HEY STUPID YAMI OF MINE!"
"Say that again, I DARE YOU!"
"(O.O)"
-
Ryou sighed, holding Malik's cat. "Why did I have to take this cat?" He sat on the bus and sighed again. A lady named Mary came over.
"Is this seat taken?" She asked.
"Not at all." Ryou said politely.
"Wow, that's a big cat!" The cat glared at her. "Yup, if he had a man he'd look like a lion. But then they'd make him get off at the zoo I suppose." Ryou just smiled.
"Zoos make me nervous. I'm never sure which side of the bars I'm on. I wonder if the animals feel that way too?"
"(O.O''''') Uh..."
"Well, I gotta change seats. You guys talk too much, I can't hear myself think." Mary said irruptly.
Ryou and the cat glanced at each other oddly as Mary left.
"You sure meet some characters on the bus." Ryou said to the man next to him.
"Watch what you said! Jupiter has spies everywhere!" The man whispered.
"(O.O)''' Like I said..." He said to Malik's cat. "Strange characters..."
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"So, what should I be Mai?" Anzu asked her friend.
"Hmm, a cheerleader?"
"I already...am..." Anzu said, frowning.
"How about Satin's wife?" Mai asked, putting up a costume.
"Um...no."
"How about...a witch?" Mai put up a sexy costume. Anzu seemed to be considering the thought.
"Ok."
"I'll be a witch with you." Mai took an even sexier and revealing costume.
"You, uh, ok." Anzu said, glancing at her oddly.
"Hey, isn't that Malik, Marik and Bakura?"
"Uh," she turned. "yeah."
With the three psycho's
"Watch me blow this bubble. You'll get a bang out of it!" Bakura said.
Fuh, fuh, FUH, FUH—
BANG!
Bakura had gum all over his face. Marik smirked, holding a needle. We all know what that means.
"You're right, that was fun." Marik said as Malik snickered.
"Here! You chew the gum this time!" Bakura said, shoving gum into Marik's mouth.
Fuh, Fuh, FUH—
BANG!
Bakura had gum in his face again and he was the one who popped the bubble.
"It's all in the lips." Marik said, smirking.
"Hey guys." Mai said, coming up to them, costume in hand and Anzu lagging behind.
"What do you two want?!" Bakura snapped, peeling the gum off his face.
"We just wanted to know if you picked out a costume yet."
"Isn't the real us scary enough for you?" Marik sneered.
"Uh, duh." Anzu said, rolling her eyes. Marik stared at her like she had just said the worst thing in history to him.
"You'd be wise to keep that smart mouth of your shut, Mazaki." Anzu rolled her eyes again and turned, leaving.
"I think Anzu likes you, Marik." Mai said slyly.
"Whatever."
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Atemu came in and saw that Jou had fixed—
"Hey Jou! You fixed my funny glasses!" Atemu slipped them on, grinning.
"Yup." Jou said, smiling
"How did you do it?"
"I used glue." Jou said snickering.
"HEY! THEY'RE STUCK TO MY FACE! AW DAMMIT!"
"Gee, Atemu. I guess this means I'll never be able to take you seriously again."
At Store
Atemu walked in the store, the glasses still glued on his face.
"I'd like some glue solvent, please." Atemu said politely.
"(-.-) Is this a hold-up?" The cashier asked.
"No, you see someone—my friend—glued these glasses to my face."
"That so?"
"Someone's disbelieving, huh?" Atemu said, frowning and glaring slightly.
"No, not at all." The cashier picked up the phone and dialed 3 numbers. "Hello, police?"
"(O.O) Oh shit..." Atemu grabbed the glue solvent and hauled ass out of there.
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Yuugi stared at Atemu, his eyes wide.
"Are you...ok, Atemu?"
"NO I AM NOT!" Atemu said, scrubbing off the glue stuck on his face.
"(OO) Ok..." Yuugi backed away from him and left him alone. "By the way, we need to go look for a costume!"
"I already have one." Atemu said stubbornly.
"ok, whatever." Yuugi said, rolling his eyes. (A/N: They roll their eyes a lot, lol)
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"What do you think, Shizuka?"
Shizuka stared at her brother.
"You're...a cat?"
"Yep. So know Kaiba can't call me a dog."
"(O.O) Umm..." She bit her lip and turned back to finishing her princess costume. Poor Jou...
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DIS: Wow, this might actually be a good Halloween fic! Anyways, I should have the next update done here soon! I already have everything set up so far! (smiles) Yep! Anywho, please review. You don't have to, but I'd like it if you did. See ya'll!