Konichiwa!
I've decided to make this short fic as a sequel to "Choices.' Hope you'll like it
Disclaimer: No, I don't own GTO. If I did, then… I'd be the happiest girl in the world.
This fic is dedicated to my good friends xianora, Larraine and Kathleen who read this first.
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"You won't dare leave me now, Yoshito. I'm going to kill myself!" a young woman in late teens shouted as she grabbed a vase and threw it to the man in question.
"Licia, don't you realize? We are not meant for each other! We both know that! Why can't you understand it!" suppressed anger was visible in the man's voice as the deep brown orbs hardened.
Tears continued pouring over the lady's blue orbs. She was a total mess judging from her hair to her clothes. Crawling to hug his leg, she continued to sob, "I love you Yoshito. That man you saw with me the other night was just for fun! I love you! Please! Don't leave me! I'll die of you do!"
The man lowered his gaze to meet that of the lady's. Pure hatred was visible in them, "We're over and that's final. Go with that guy you were flirting with yesterday, I don't care."
The lady 's arms dropped to her sides. She quietly stood up and disappeared to her room. Kikuchi sighed and was preparing to leave when the door of Licia's bedroom opened. He stopped and looked over his shoulders to see her holding a small knife against her pulse.
"Leave me and I'll kill myself," she threatened with a deadly voice. Cold brown orbs went back to position.
"Do what you want, I don't care," he stated plainly, his voice carrying venom that tore the heart of the lady with his every word.
"Do- don't you really feel anything for me that you don't care if I die?" she whispered, the knife dropping to the floor with a loud thud.
The soft summer wind swish through the open window. The silky black blanket shimmering with stars enveloped the busy streets of New York.
The man answered as if hearts were made of paper, "I cared for you before but not now."
The lady froze. Her cries were silenced as the truth surfaced. "You must be joking..."
"No." And by that, the man grasped the handle of the door and walked out of the house.
The man continued walking into the busy streets of the city, the noise covering the cries and pleads of the woman.
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Veritas vos Liberabit
(The truth will set you free)
Miriae
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White linen bed being wheeled into the ER...
A lady with blonde hair and mismatched eyes staring...
Lips curved in a dying smile...
The doors of the ER closing... wishing not to be opened again...
My eyes snapped open, so it was all a dream.. Another nightmare about how she died.
Glancing at the clock, I frowned. It was a few hours before dawn, not a nice time to wake up, isn't it? I curled up and tried to get some more sleep but to no success.
Can't be helped...
I got out of bed and grabbed a jacket and my silver-rimmed glasses. In a time like this, the only place to find sanctuary was on the roof.
Climbing on the roof was as easy as reciting the alphabet. It seemed that the ledge leading to the roof was made especially for this occasion. In no time I was on the roof.
From this roof, you could see the sunrise... the majestic golden lollipop of the sky rising gently from the mountains in the horizon. It was a wonderful site I have admired since I was a kid. I watched it together with my dad back then. The feeling it gives you is amazingly wonderful... as if nothing would go wrong.
I laid myself comfortably, watching the dark sky tinted with stars. Is she watching this beautiful view before me?
You may wonder whom I was referring to. But, you don't need to really think much about her. She's long dead and dead people can't be brought back to life.
I remember every detail about her, even from the first day we met. She was different, she really was. Her soft blonde hair sparkled under the bright sunlight. Her pale complexion complemented her rosy cheeks. The mismatched orbs: one blue and one brown, held so much wisdom in them.
She was strong... and weird. Why? It is because she loved blowing things up. She rides motorcycles like a drunkard even it was her first time. She can have pretty absurd ideas of getting money... like kidnapping or something like that. She loved making teachers feel small about themselves. And most importantly, she loves French and Latin.
Her name was Kanzaki Urumi, same age as me if she hasn't died a few months ago. Leukemia. That is the evil guy who took her from me. She was strong but the guy was a professional killer. She died... she died waiting for me to come back.
It was a drizzling that day when I arrived at the airport. I was so happy that I'm back here in Japan. The first thing I wanted to do was rush out and see Kanzaki and tell her how much I love her, that I have never loved someone like I her. And then, my cell phone rang. It was my mom saying that my dad had been rushed to the hospital.
The cell phone I held almost fell out of my grasp as I heard her terrified voice. She was shaking, I could tell. Her words turned my blood cold.
"Dad... hospital... heart attack..."
I didn't need to hear her anymore. In a flash, I called up my uncle and asked him where my father is. I rushed to the said hospital; every thought of Kanzaki vanished from my mind.
It took me about an hour to get to the hospital. I was so stressed out that I cursed anyone who got into my way. Dad is strong... he will not let sickness get him. He will recover... he will.
The emergency room was in sight... I could see all hose doctors trying to save lives. People were hugging each other, crying in each other's arms. Few meters more and I'll reach the emergency room, dad, please... wait for me...
I was running with beads of sweat trickling down my face. I don't know why but I stopped just a meter from the emergency room. Fishing my handkerchief from my pocket, I wiped my face.
It took me about a full minute to realize that I was standing in the way. Dragging myself into the corner, I saw a lady crying as she watch the bed being rushed to the ER. Catching a glimpse on the lady in the bed, my eyes widened.
Blonde hair... mismatched eyes...?
It was Kanzaki Urumi.
I was speechless.
Millions of questions bombarded my brain as she looked at me. Why is she here? Why is she being rushed to the ER? Why is she staring at me with that dying glitter in her eyes?
We had a staring match, all memories flooded back on me. Here she was, the girl I loved, being rushed to the ER, and I just watched her, doing nothing.
The feeling of dread was unbearable.
But then... she smiled at me, a true smile that I haven't seen for years.
I could feel my heart tearing into pieces as she smiled. She was smiling even she was at the gate of death.
And then.. the doors of he ER closed on us forever... It was the first and the last time I saw her smile.
That was a brief summary of that faithful day of her death. You may ask how I could narrate it with such ease. The answer is simple: I'm already immune to the pain of that day. I'm so tired of everything that has happened that I can no longer feel anything for it.
My father died a few hours after she did. Hah! First she left, next, he followed. What a coincidence! I wished I could follow them but no! He won't allow me.
I really don't know why I still wake up every morning, why I still have the strength to get up and do my daily tasks. Couldn't just I drop dead?
Drop dead?
An idea popped into my mind. Jumping from here would probably kill me... If I were to be dead... then... I could be free of this unbearable sadness...
I got up and walked over to the edge. Will I jump or not? Will I kill myself or not?
"I don't like seeing people die with lots of blood staining the road."
I froze. Someone was here with me. Has my mom woken up already? But her voice was different.. this person is not my mom but... I have heard her before...
Turning my head, I felt my jaw drop silently on the floor.
There she was standing, the girl who haunted my dreams for the past months. She was not wearing a white dress like a ghost; instead, she was wearing a nice midnight blue dress.
"What's the matter, Yoshito? Do I look like a ghost?"
I must be dreaming. Kanzaki Urumi is standing here right before me, solid and human in every aspect.
"Wha-wha... what...?"
She smiled at me, taking a step forward. "You know what..." Her steps became faster that she was practically running. She threw her arms around me, "I really missed you, Yoshito."
I was practically rooted to the spot. Why... why is she here...? Isn't she long... dead?
But she didn't seem to be a ghost either. I felt her collide with me. Her warm breath tickled my neck. So... what's happening?
"Why are you... here?"
Her eyes were innocent, carefree at every angle you look at them. "Don't you want me to be here?"
A thought hit me. It doesn't matter how she came here. What matters is that she is here, alive and breathing. Realization dawned; the girl I have ever loved is here... she is here with me. Maybe this time... I could tell her...
Hastily, I wrapped my arms around her.
"Kanzaki..."
Tightening my embrace, I grazed into her blonde hair. I never thought I would ever have this chance, just embracing her as if there's no tomorrow.
Oh God... please... let this moment stay forever.
I held her like that for minutes that seemed hours. Finally, she broke away.
Sitting comfortably, she gazed into the stars. "I feel I could touch these heavenly bodies when I reach out my hand."
Smiling and following her gesture, I replied, "Their light proves to us that even we are far from our love ones, we could still see them... feel their presence."
"You know what, I had similar thoughts a few years ago... when you left for America."
That was it. Everything shattered. Here she was, talking about the past as if nothing happened.
"I..." I want to tell you what happened back then... I want to tell you why... I want to tell you...
"It is okay... I understand..." she whispered. "I trust you."
Kanzaki.. you don't understand.. I went away because I love you... I love you so much!
And right there, I just snapped. I grabbed her, embracing her like I have dreamed of, tears pouring uncontrollably.
"Kanzaki... the reason why I haven't been in touch for you more than a year is because... I'm a coward. I was afraid..."
"I was afraid of rejection... I have loved you since the day I laid my eyes on you. I can't bear to destroy our friendship because of what I felt for you. That's why I left... I thought I could forget all about you. But no! You haunted my dreams every night, I can't take you off my mind!"
"And then I met her, Licia Clark. She was nice, funny and beautiful. I thought she could replace you. That's why I courted her. We got together for three months."
"But I was wrong. Even with Licia by my side, I still craved to see you, to have enough courage to tell you how important you are to me!"
"I thought that day will never come, the day I will be able to have the courage to go back here and face you. But then it happened on a warm summer night in a bar in New York. I found Licia flirting with another man. She was betraying me. If that were the case, then it would be better if we split up. I realized that I was wrong in using Licia to cover for you, Licia is Licia, and Kanzaki is Kanzaki. That was the truth I shut my brain to."
"I left Licia that night without looking back. It may pain her but it was for the best. I am not the right man for her, she was not the woman for me."
"I arrived in Japan several hours later, fresh and alive. I was ready to face you but you got me first... you left me without a goodbye..."
I felt my heart racing fast. Saying that mouthful of words with on breath was definitely hard. But it was at the bottom of my concern, what matters is Kanzaki's response.
She was silent for a while.. and then, she smiled. Brushing a pale hand on my cheek, she asked, "When will you ever call me by my given name, Yoshito?"
I was speechless. She was calm and reserved the whole time I related my side of the story. I closed my eyes... this is really the Kanzaki I know...
"Kanzaki..."
Tilting her head to the side, she pouted, a scene I never dreamed of seeing. "Urumi, call me Urumi..."
"U-uru..." I couldn't get the words out of my mouth. It was awkward, one moment I was busy explaining, the next thing, she is asking me to call her by her given name.
"Urumi"
"U-urumi..."
She smiled. "At last, you have called me by my name..."
She placed her head on my shoulder, closing her eyes from time to time. I have never thought that this would happen... together we watch the dark sky turn lighter every second...
It was a moment of serenity... Nirvana, if I could call it. We just rested there, no words needed for communication.
Suddenly, she spoke, "Did you receive the letter I entrusted with my aunt?"
I bowed my head... the memories of standing in her grave flashed, "Yes.. I did."
"The sad thing about choices is you never really know if they're good or bad until you've actually made them. Even then you never see the consequences of the choices you did not take, so how would you know. Hence, our regrets, the "what ifs" that we find ourselves thinking every now and then are pointless..."
"That's what you said n the letter..."
"It meant that I don't blame you for leaving... since if you haven't left, I don't know what could have happened... either way, there are consequences that can't be helped. It was just a matter of weighing which is better. That's why you don't need to blame yourself from anything. You are you, you can't live in the shadows just because you think you are obligated to be. Everything is in you hands, your decisions are for you."
I felt silent. She was right... she definitely was right...
"You really are more knowledgeable in Literature than I am," I managed to comment.
"Improving your sense of humor, are we not?'
She was here... listening to me as I listen to her...
Maybe I could tell her now...
Gathering all my courage, I faced her. This was no time to be a coward. I have waited long enough... I must now be a real man.
"Urumi..." I know I can say it... "I want to tell you that..." Say it, Yoshito, you have suffered long because of it... "I... I l-love you.."
There, I said it.
Answering the questioning look on her face, I bowed my head, ready for her reply.
She sighed. "I waited long for you to say that... I'm glad you did."
It was as if a giant rock had been removed from my system. Those words that I failed tell her before had now been said, I could now rest...
"Yoshito... don't forget... I always loved you... I always..."
I pulled her closer and we shared a kiss.. for the first time...
After we broke apart, she smiled at me and stroked my hair. My eye lids were becoming heavy every second...
And then... all was black...
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"Yoshito... wake up now. How many time have I told you not to sleep here in the open?"
Rubbing my eyes groggily, I stretched. I must have fallen asleep while talking with Urumi...
"Yoshito... get up now, it's morning..."
After readjusting my vision, I saw my mom shaking me awake. Looking at my right and left I became aware of things... especially someone...
Urumi isn't here...?
"Yoshito, what were you thinking sleeping here in the roof. You could catch a cold," mom lectured me, concerned.
"I'll come down in a few minutes," I muttered.
Throwing me a quizzical look, mom left me to my own world here in the roof.
The sun had fully risen, the neighborhood springing to life. It was another new day at this peaceful city.
But... where's Urumi? Why isn't she here?
Is everything… all a dream?
Running a hand on my unruly brown locks, I laughed, a hearty laugh that wasn't heard for months. I was stupid to think what happened was real. Urumi is dead and she couldn't come back to life.
Tilting my painful neck from side to side, I smiled. Somehow, I felt freshened. It seemed that the world has gotten bigger, I could go to any place I like and do anything I want.
This is a new day for me, a day that will mark my new awakening. Maybe Urumi visited me to remind how great life is. She may have left, but it is not the end. I will surely follow her, but not now. I still have a couple of years to live and wasting it would be an insult to Urumi.
Urumi... wherever you are... we'll always be together.
Her visit gave me two things: first is the will to continue living and the second one is...
"Hachoo!"
a bad cold.
"I was never one to patiently pick up the broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken - and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best that mend it and see the broken places as long as I live."
- Margaret Mitchell
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So what do you think? Please Review!!!
Pointless, isn't it? I really don't know why I wrote this sequel... I really don't know! It's 11:30pm and yet I'm finishing this fic... sigh...
You may ask why I ended it like that... I really don't know why! I just felt there was a need to lighten things up.
Oh yeah, the title is in Latin, caught my eye will searching for a title.
Please be kind with your critiques!