Addendum 5.1 – "Savor the Veal 'pt. 4'"

April 1993 – Fairfield, CT

Eyes still shut, Angela stretched backward in bed, her chin tipping her head deep into the fluffy pillows. Morning light triumphed through the semi-sheer curtains of the bay window, and with an exhale that seemed more emotional than physical, she looked down at Tony.

He stirred but didn't wake. Carefully moving a lock of bangs off his forehead, she earned herself a better view of the relaxed profile smooshed against her belly button. A soft smile plumped her cheekbones as her gaze wandered from his beautiful features. The wide shoulders at which she'd spent 7 years stealing glances - and the all too occasional feel - now snuggled her bare hips into the California King mattress they'd bought together not a month before he'd left.

Gratitude pumped through her with every breath that gently buoyed his precious face. He came back.

I was worth it. To him.

Angela had left Iowa with the resolution that she loved Tony enough to let him grow into who he was meant to be. She wasn't going to hold another man back from his dreams. She wasn't going insist they could want each other badly enough to make it work. They couldn't. She was dying out there and continuing to pretend that she wasn't had done ugly things to her heart.

All the hiding. All the fake smiles. You'd think I'd have learned my lesson by now. She had wanted to show Tony that he was worth the sacrifice but ended up showing him there wasn't one.

So many lies. I had to tell him the truth – okay, once he pulled it out of me. And the truth is that even though I couldn't thrive in Iowa, Tony could – and he deserved that chance. Angela couldn't stand the thought of Tony looking at her the way Michael did. Just the thought brought a shuddery breath to their contented scene.

Swallowing, she smoothed out her breathing and blinked away the tears that had already started. She didn't want to wake him yet. Looking down again, she kept studying.

The truth is, I felt like I was holding Tony back for a long time before he got his big break. He was antsy; he wasn't happy, even with me.

That old ball and chain feeling tightened around her throat. Why do I always fall for men who don't really want me? A bumbling image of Geoffrey came mind, and she had to stifle a laugh. Tony stirred again.

"Holy cow, Angela…" his soft lips mumbled unconsciously, a tiny bit of drool mixing in to tickle her tummy.

Angela tightened her stomach as much as she could, but her involuntary giggles were working against her. Okay, maybe Geoffrey wanted me, but I didn't want him. The men I'm really attracted to find me fascinating for a hot minute, then the truth catches up to us.

But not this time.

Angela smiled. Tony came back. He tried my truth, and found it was crap.

Michael's compass wobbled around with her, but he always found his happiness abroad.

Grant… well, he wasn't ready to be happy.

Angela's eyebrows rose and fell. Good thing, too.

She was, again, awash with gratitude at how things had played out. The fear of missing out on Tony and every smile he'd inspired over the last decade jolted her to the present.

She let her spellbound stare drift down the strong back separating her thighs, holding her securely in place and warming her lower half how the discarded comforter never could've. She felt so protected.

Finally.

Something was always amiss. With the wrong guy. With the right guy. But now she had it all.

Half her smile tipped up as she saw the sheet rumpled carelessly over most of his butt.

Damn, he's cute…

She hoped his calves and toes hanging off the bed were still being warmed by whatever embers were left in the fireplace.

But as much as Angela liked to look at him, she felt a little lonely continuing to indulge in the intimacy by herself.

"Tony," her low voice hummed.

Her thumbs kneaded her favorite shoulders in the whole wide world, and Tony made a sleepy groan into her stomach before turning his face toward the window.

"Baby, wake up," she smiled.

He blinked his squinting eyes into the new light, and she jostled her fingers through his hair.

Still frowning, he pushed himself up, plodded his hands and arms dramatically up to her level, and collapsed on top of her.

"Ohlff!" she laughed. "Hey! Watch it."

From the preferred shadows behind her ear, he muffled, "I ran a marathon last night, and you're waking me up at dawn?"

"We ran a marathon..." she smacked his butt, and Tony pulled his new smile in front of hers. "And it's been at least three hours." She poked her tongue just a little out of a wide smile, "Don't want to get lazy."

Grin to grin, he growled low. "Slave. Driver."

Pushing herself out from underneath, Angela climbed on top and hovered over him. Bracing her hands out wide, she leaned her hips slowly back. Every part of her body just barely grazed his before settling with her shoulders low and her hips high.

Popping her eyebrows up, she asked, "So, this isn't voluntary?"

She waited a beat and then made a quick lick to his chest.

Tony's frozen eye contact seemed to be his only available rebuttal.

Angela pushed her arms straight and lowered her hips. She squished her face, "Mmmm - I'm getting conflicting reports…"

He rolled his eyes and flipped her laughing body back underneath him. Sliding swiftly inside her, he shook his defeated smile, "Conflicting reports…"

"I see how it is: you have to get up to go to work and didn't wanna be the only one gettin' out of a cozy bed." Looking pleased with his analysis, Tony squirted shampoo into his hands and frothed up his hair.

Angela stepped out from under the water and inhaled a coy smile. Smoothing the water back over her long hair, she twirled it over her shoulder. "Are you suggesting I wanted another round with the great Tony Micelli for anything other than guaranteed paradise?"

Tony's cocky stare hesitated, and he glanced to the side before twisting up those amazing eyebrows. "…Did you?"

She paused for effect and blinked dryly, "Little bit."

His mouth dropped open just enough for her tongue. Kissing him deeply, she slicked her body around against his. He kissed her back, reaching down to grip her butt and hold her closely. Suds fell down his forehead, and she wiped them away from their eyes.

Pulling back to suck in a mouthful of pure steam, Angela's playful smile turned serious. "Tony, I was without you for so long – and not just these last couple of months. Not just all those years we could've been together and weren't. But all the years before that. Life has purpose, and none of it was wasted. But if you think I can look back over my life and not be overwhelmed by what wasn't there…" She looked down and shook her head. Taking another big breath, she looked back up into his eyes. "Please don't begrudge my early wake-up calls. I've been missing you."

Tony didn't say anything. He moved his hands up, cinching his arms silently behind her waist, and his gaze chaotically flickered to her lips, their chests, then back up to her eyes. He slowed in for another kiss, and she gave it to him. Grateful, hungry, devastated, and replete, she kissed him.

Slowing backward, Angela watched herself slip her squeezing hands up the curves of his muscular arms, past the macho tattoo he'd confided was a ruse, and wrap her arms behind his neck. She pressed her head in next to his, and her open lungs were able to fully expand.

The water and the steam were still going full force, but as he held her almost painfully tight, she was pretty sure she heard him breathe, "Never leaving you again."

A/N: I'm going with markaleen's estimation that there was a two month gap between Angela leaving Iowa for good and Tony following suit.

Also, a few months back, I ran across an old black and white photo shoot of Johnny Depp and Kate Moss in the wake-up position I described. So, the idea's not mine, but it's what came to mind when I thought of how I was going to start this battle. You're welcome. ;)