Chapter Five: How Could You?
When she awoke, someone was in the room.
Automatically her hand went to the sword that was never far from her side and drew it. She almost thrust it forward before he yelled, "Wait! I'm not here to hurt you!"
Rose swore, a nasty curse not meant for ladies, and put the heavy sword back into its scabbard, sitting up. "Darius, you never sneak up on me, especially at night!" She growled. "I could have killed you!" –I'll have to later, but I want to keep people alive for as long as I can.-
"I…I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you." He was back to his polite self again. "I…I brought you your dinner."
"I slept through dinner? Didn't you say that you would wake me?" She didn't move, eyeing the food platter he held in his hands.
"I was going to. But you only slept for a little while, and I didn't want to disturb you. I…I was just going to leave the platter here for when you woke up." He explained, holding it out like a peace offering.
She took it, sniffed it surreptitiously, and decided there was no poison. It didn't matter; her liver would automatically take away any poison she consumed anyway. She had learned this before, after several times.
"Do you want to talk?" Darius asked, sitting down next to her.
She was surprised yet again at his sudden mood changes and by his actions. He went from nervous and apologetic straight into his gentle nosiness again. And an unmarried man was never supposed to sit down next to an unmarried woman in her bed unless they were betrothed to each other. She got up quickly. "No. I don't feel like talking. What have we to talk about?"
"I want to know everything. About your past. About yourself. About the Dragons and Dragoons." His bluntness was flat this time.
"Why? It is meaningless to you." –Even if I tell you, I'll have to kill you.- She paced over to the window, her movements dark and jerky, as if she was holding back incredible energy.
"I just want to know. Call it curiosity if you want to. It doesn't matter to me. I just want to know."
Rose pivoted on the heel of her right foot, turning to glare at him. She opened her mouth—
And stopped.
Because he wasn't curious at all. Not in the sense of a scholar wanting to know more about a certain history lesson, or a male taking an interest in a lady. She shut her mouth, seeing the sadness in his eyes.
-What the?-
His eyes weren't malicious or prodding or annoyingly curious. Instead his eyes were filled the infinite sadness that reflected her heart. "Will you tell me?"
She sat down next to him, silently, staring at the rose flowers on the floor. They had not begun to wilt yet, but they would soon. Life was like that. Birth, bloom, death. It was unfortunate, but it was inevitable. These flowers would die soon, and so would humans. Everything was liked in the great wheel of life that bound them to mortality.
She was snapped out of her daze when Darius put an arm around her slim shoulders. She stiffened automatically. "What are you doing?" she hissed, pulling away and glaring at him. The sadness was still in his eyes.
"I'm trying to show you how wrong you are." He told her. "You do need love."
Her upper lip lifted slightly. "I need not learn it from you. I am—was—engaged." –To a dead man- her mind added silently. –Zieg…-
"I…" Darius turned his hands palms upward in a sign of innocence, but he seemed flustered. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. But…I want to know. More about you. Will you tell me?" he repeated, so innocent, so childish, so that she forgot her temporary hate for him.
"Yes." The word came out naturally, her tone simple, as if it was the most normal thing in the world to tell a human about her past. "Come with me to the garden."
Wordlessly he rose and walked beside her, out of the house and onto the porch in front, by the garden. She noted with some amusement that the rosebushes looked rather worse for the wear. "What do you want to know?"
"Everything."
"I can't possibly tell you everything." She chided almost gently. "Narrow it down and I'll try to do my best."
"All right, let's start with your childhood. Kata told me a bit about it, but not much."
Rose cupped her chin in her gloved hands. "I was the daughter of a rich couple. They didn't really have a lot of time for me, and I was left with a nanny. I hated the hell out of her. I was a spoiled little brat, always wanting my wishes done immediately. But all that changed when I met him."
"Who?"
"Zieg."
"He was…your fiancé?" Darius asked quietly.
"He was my life." She corrected fiercely. "I loved him. The Dragon Campaign had just started. My town was attacked, my family killed. At that time, I was…maybe sixteen? I've lost my sense of time. Zieg saved me. And for that moment, we were the only two people in the world. He told me that I had a strong aura, a powerful spirit. He said that I might be able to help. Immediately I agreed. I would follow him to the ends of the world if he wanted me to. My entire personality changed, from selfish and spoiled to a sort of mild timid woman with an obsession. I became a Dragoon and the psychic link deepened our connection. Our love was eternal, or so I thought."
"What happened?"
Rose took a long deep shuddering breath. –Why am I telling him this?- "He…he fought the leader of the Wingly Army, Melbu Frahma. He managed to kill him, but Melbu Frahma transformed him to stone with his last power. Zieg was torn from me forever." She took another deep breath. "Michael was all I had left. We continued our journey together. At first it was a journey to heal ourselves from the deaths of our friends, but then…it became something more. We had an obligation now. We had to—" She cut off her flow of words.
-Gods above I was about to tell him about the Black Monster!-
"Had to what?"
"Nothing." She snapped flatly. "It's none of your business and you wouldn't understand."
"What? What happened to telling me the truth?"
"I never promised that I was going to tell you the truth!" Rose growled. "You simple-minded humans and your stupid prejudice. You'll never understand! None of you can understand!" Her voice rose to a shriek and caused a candle to light in the hallway.
"What's going on?" Kata asked sleepily, holding the candle, which shone its light on the face of Kristoff, who was not far behind her, eyes narrowed. While Darius was open and sincere with her, his brother was the opposite, always watching her out of wary eyes.
"Nothing." Rose answered them honestly, standing up and tossing her head. "Nothing at all."
Pushing past a sleep-ruffled Kata and a surprised Kristoff. "Good night."
"Darius, what happened?" Kristoff demanded. "I thought that you agreed to leave her alone."
"I did!" Darius protested halfheartedly, still sitting on the steps. "Or at least, I didn't mean to pry. But she just looked so…alone. Like a little girl."
"Brother, she is anything but a little girl. She is a lioness ready to attack."
"Darius, listen to him." Kata pleaded. "We both have a really bad feeling about her. She knows more about the Dragon than anyone is supposed to, and she's a powerful warrior. She doesn't have much of a past and she's too mysterious."
"Not to mention all that crap about her being some Dragoon or other." Kristoff commented easily, running one bronze hand through wood-colored hair that matched his eyes. "I say she's psychotic. It's impossible for her to be one of the Dragoons. I doubt they even existed."
"They did exist." Kata informed them. "But if the lady is speaking the truth and she is one of them, then what has happened to her? From what I read, the Dragoons were supposed to be heroes. But she seems…"
"Bitchy." Kristoff finished for his petite sister. "I still say that we should take her to see the doctor in town. Maybe she got a head wound when she passed out in the fields."
"We're not taking her to see Dr. Eno." Darius hissed through his teeth. "Her head is perfectly fine, and with the two of you talking about her like that, no wonder she's cold and reserved."
"I don't understand why you're being so nice to her, Brother. She's done nothing for us, and likely she'll do nothing, except bring trouble. The story of hers about the Dragon. It hasn't been sighted today, but it will return sometime and gods know what she'll do."
"We'll deal with that when the time comes. Lady Rose is staying here." Darius's tone was firm and unbendable.
Kata shook her head sadly. "A fool in love has clouded judgment. Fine, Dar, but don't say we didn't warn you." Then she looked out over the garden. "What in the gods' names did you do to my roses?"
-Zieg, what should I do?- Rose lay restlessly on the bed, striking her fist against the mattress in hopes of letting go of some anger. –I don't want to be unfaithful to you. With the gods as my witness, I love you, my darling. But Darius…he…I don't know what to do, my love. You always told me to follow my heart. My nonexistent heart now says to tell him the truth. Maybe he'll be able to help. But…my conscience or my soul or whatever the hell it is that's supposed to keep me from doing bad things, not that it works, tells me not to. I'm going to kill him anyway, right? Why not let him know the whole truth? Gods, Zieg, I'm so confused. I wish you were here. You'd take care of me, right?-
"Mmf." She mumbled into her pillow and she turned her face into it. "Stupid destiny. Why drop everything onto my shoulders?" She paused for a moment and then yelled, "By the Moon and the nine hells, why do I have the make the difference?" The cloth of the pillow muffled her voice, and her question too. Were there even any gods out there? If there were, they were cruel bastards who liked to watch her squirm as she tried to carry out the Fate that they had planned for her. Stupid Soa, with his/her little prophecy. Stupid Charle Frahma, who gave this "job" to her. Stupid Moon Child, whom she had to kill every 108 years. Damn stupid conscience, for making her care.
To take her mind of things, she tried meditation, but that didn't work either, not without the comforting aura of Michael around her. Damn it, he was like her wall of protection.
-Michael, where ARE you?- she demanded with her mind, stretching out and broadcasting her thoughts. –And why the hell are you doing what you're doing? I thought we got over this bloodlust! At least come back to me so that I can help you!-
No answer. Of course. Why would the gods be so kind to her?
Still furious, she finally managed to convince her body to go to sleep.
"Good morning." Kata called out to her as she entered the dining room, as if she was a welcome guest that had been a part of their family for a while now. "Good sleep?"
-Not really.- "Fine." She lied. She was used to it by now.
The other girl eyed her carefully. "You don't need a change of clothes?"
"My armor doesn't dirty. I don't need to change." Soa knows those stupid dresses only make her feel weak and delicate. "Do we need to go hunting again today?"
"No, not today. That bear you brought back will keep us full for another day or so." Kristoff replied. "Which brings me up to the topic of the day. The Dragon was sighted last night, circling the nearby town. It attacked, but the laser missed."
Rose froze in her motions, then half-rose from her chair. "Where is Michael now? I have to find him, talk to him, calm him down somehow."
"Lady Rose." Darius put a hand on her shoulder and gently pushed her back into her seat. "Your friend was seen late at night, when the Moon was the brightest. He'll be back."
Rose clenched her hands into fists. "Fine. Anything I can help with?"
"No." Kata answered quickly, before her brother could intercede. With her right hand, she toyed with a necklace that was fastened to her throat, a pendant in the shape of two crescent moons. "We're harvesting most of the crops in. The Dragon might attack again. Last time he took out half our cornfield. We can do it by ourselves. You just rest up or whatever it is you Dragoons do in your free time."
-She mocks me.- Rose thought darkly. –Human-
Darius obviously caught the train of thought she was projecting, because the hand on her shoulder tightened a bit and he looked down at her with knowing eyes. She made a face and turned back to her breakfast. –You Humans will never understand. How could you? Raised in the prejudice that you claim had ended with the war I fought in. But though you mock me, I shall regret having to kill you. Especially you, Darius.-
She sat on the front step of the porch, a bored look plastered onto her face as she watched the three siblings tug on ears of corn and place them in baskets.
-If I helped, things would go twice as fast. But I won't help, not until you ask me.- She allowed herself a smile. –Like that'll happen- She wasn't stupid. She knew that Kristoff didn't like her at all and Kata distrusted her. Darius was the only one who understood. Maybe she could not kill him. Maybe somehow she could spare his life. Somehow!
-No, don't think like that. It's thoughts like that which will eventually lead to your downfall.-
Darius walked by and tossed something to her. She caught it without her hand even going near her sword. Trust was easy around him. Another rose, this one pure red. She was surprised Kata let him anywhere near the rest of her rosebushes. –Oh yes, I'm sure your sister just loves it that you give her flowers to a claiming-to-be-a-Dragoon woman who she thinks is a psychotic killer-
He smiled as he watched her turn the rose over in her small pale hands. A slow smile spread across her face, lifting her lips, and she laughed slightly. Gods above, she looked like a moon maiden, with that pale skin and dark hair.
"You're getting in over your head." Kristoff murmured. "Sending her flowers now?"
Darius pretended he didn't hear. It wasn't hard, when he looked at her. She was like a portal into another world, one that beckoned with mystery and the unknown.
"Darius! Hey, Darius!" A new voice cried out from beyond the cornfields. "Where are you?"
"Over here!" He called back.
A young man broke through the tall stalks of corn, panting. The blacksmith's son, Tomas, obviously bringing exciting news. "The Dragon's just been sighted again. It's hovering over the forest. Our hunters are getting ready to attack it."
Darius tensed. If Rose heard about this… "Thomas, get out of here, quick. Go tell everyone else." Quick, please leave, before she notices something wrong.
It was too late for that. The raven-haired beauty had already stood up from the porch steps, her eyes narrowed. –Something's wrong.- Straining her ears, she could catch the word Dragon and that was enough. The boy bringing the message disappeared into the cornfield again, running toward the darkened spot that had been scorched lifeless by Michael's attack.
Rose gripped the flower in her left hand and the hilt of her sword in her right, walking quickly down the steps and toward Darius. "What happened?" She demanded, her voice steeled and firm, but to Darius's trained ears, he could hear the underlying fear. "What did that boy say?"
"Nothing, Lady Rose. It was news unimportant to you. One of the ladies in town had a baby daughter, that's all." He quickly assured her. Don't find out I'm lying. I'm doing this for your own health.
Rose's eyes narrowed into fire again, and she would have believed him had she been a normal mortal Human female. "You can't lie to me, Darius. I know something's wrong!" her voice rose again, into audible anger and fear. "Just tell me what happened!"
Pain. Fear. Anger. Bloodlust. Kill. Master? Fear…
She stumbled again, taking a large step back, clutching her head, dropping the rose and her grip on her sword.
"Michael!" She screamed and the connection was gone. "I have to go to him! He's in the forest!"
She started running, but strong arms caught her around the waist, and she kicked to a stop in midair. "Lady Rose, calm down." Darius yelled over her furious shrieks. "Calm down! This isn't healthy for you or anyone. The hunters will take care of Michael."
"They'll kill him!" She kicked out with her strong legs, striking nothing but air. "Put me down! I have to go to him! He's scared and he's frightened and he needs me! Let me go!"
"Gods…" Kata whispered, watching her brother restrain the obviously powerful and frightened woman who was kicking and screaming to get away. How had she known the Dragon would be at the forest, unless she really was one of the Dragoons?
"Let me go!" Rose screamed, kicking backwards and missing. "Darius, put me down, NOW! I have to go to him! He needs me! He's scared and he's hurt!" –I didn't want to do this!- She fell limp suddenly and he stared down at her, incredulous, thinking she had passed out from the rush. But she sprang to life quicker than a snake playing dead, pushing her feet down into the ground, and pushing herself up. In effect, she managed to twist out of his constraining arms and landing on her own two feet behind him. "I have to go to him! I'm sorry, but he needs me."
Stumbling once in her hurry, she righted herself and dashed over toward where his mind signature had suddenly flared to life. Lean swift legs drove her fast as the wind, sword half-drawn and waiting. She didn't want to kill, but if that was what would protect her Michael, well then, she was ready.
The forest was scarcely a forest anymore. It had been caught in Michael's black laser's reverberation, no doubt, because several of the trees had fallen over, and the aura was just wrong.
There! She could see him now! Flying above the forest, scared and frightened and defensive. Below him…hunters, with crossbows and long sharp objects. And catapults. –Damn did they come prepared!- She roared silently, with her mind, startling the minds of all the other living creatures. They paused but didn't stop, loading up the weapons.
"Don't!" She screamed. Barehanded, she snapped a branch off a tree. The branch was twice as thick as her wrist. Strange what adrenaline and passion could do to someone, huh? With her newly made weapon, she knocked several of the men out of the way. "Stop it!"
When everyone's disconcerted attention was on her, she tossed the branch away, crossed her arms over her chest, shut her eyes, and screamed. Physically and mentally.
Her physical scream managed to knock away several of the men with its high pitch and raw emotion, surprising them into a mild shock. Her mental scream stunned Michael into simply floating in the air, staring down at her with eyes that were no longer in bloodlust, but frightened.
Gods, he was frightened! He hadn't been scared while fighting the Virages and Winglies in the Dragon Campaign, but he's scared now, and I'm afraid and I don't know what to do! Rose panicked, her mind in animal mode.
-No. Get a grip, NOW. Because if you don't, you are BOTH going to DIE.- Her common sense, her calm Dragoon mind took over and she took a deep breath, pulling out her necklace and holding it in her hand. This would take a lot of power, to reach him through his frightened state of mind and his bloodlust insanity. But she had to do it.
"What the hell does that bitch think she's doing?" One of the men snarled.
"Leave her. She'll be good bait for the Dragon. When it comes down, we can get it."
Rose shut out their voices and their comments. It wasn't like it was something she never heard before. She focused her entire being and concentration on Michael. She yelled for all her mind was worth
-MICHAEL!-
The Dragon's mind was confused at the voice and mind signature, but she had gotten through.
-Listen, Michael, Darkness Dragon, it's me, Rose. I'm your partner, your master, your Dragoon, your counterpart, your friend. Listen to me. Stop this right now. Stop it. I'm not ordering you as a master, I'm pleading with you as a friend. Stop it, please?-
Like a child taking its first steps he responded. Master? His thought wavered, like a leaf in a tornado. Master, help?
-Yes, I'm here to help. Don't come down here, Michael. Don't stay down here. These men will destroy you. Calm down. I'm here for you. I always have, and I always will be. Listen to me. Calm down.- Her mind was calmer now, relieved. She had gotten through! –I'm going to send you some thoughts.
The way a sun releases light, she emanated her feelings. Her joy when he dipped down to the earth and soared back up as she sat on his back, their "laughter" when they had both gotten nervous over a little rabbit, her warmth as she "spoke" with him and he sheltered her from the night wind.
"Okay?" She was unaware that she said it out loud. –"Come on down here. We'll fly away together. I'll help you, and things can go back to the way they were"- On a private thought to herself, a little part thought. –What about Darius?- But he didn't matter as much as Michael.
The Darkness Dragon made a couple more passes overhead and fluttered nimbly down beside her. She started to climb onto his back when he roared in pain and reared, and she went flying again. Dazed, she shook the blackness out of her vision to see the arrow protruding from his back.
"NO!"
Pain. Fear. Leave. Go! Michael's mind had reverted to its frightened animal form and he pushed off the ground, gliding away.
"No!" Rose stood up and ran over to the man who held the crossbow. Her steps were slow and heavy but held the power of a tidal wave. "You fool! I had him calmed down! He would have been calm and peaceful in just a few more seconds! But you interfered, you mindless stupid Human! I had him calmed down and you just had to get in my way, you fool!"
The man blinked several times at her outburst, and then his face grew ruddy with his anger. No woman ever dared to talk like this. "Hey, you listen here, lady, we had a perfectly good battle plan until you cam alone and disrupted us! You—"
"Shut up! Just shut up! You ruined it all!" Unconsciously, she had picked up a rock and hurled it.
It was a good thing her anger was too great for her to aim correctly. The rock missed, but her strength made her cause a deep indentation in the tree behind him. Had she actually struck him, she would have probably killed him.
She was surprised at her act of violence. She wasn't normally so out-of-control, but her mind was just too strained. She could have calmed down Michael, but this stupid macho Human man just had to interfere with her plans! Everything would have been back to normal! She almost had it all back again. Ten thousand years of suffering for her friend now gone. She was ready to kick out at anything to let go of her anger. Besides, it wasn't like they would have actually killed Michael. He would have retaliated. She saved their useless Human lives.
Afraid that she would lose her powerful temper, Rose ran off back into the darks of the forest and grabbed her pendant again.
-Please, please, please, gods, or anyone out there who has control of this, please just help me. For everything that I've done for the world, just help me with this one thing!- She clasped the pendant tightly in her hand and called on the power of the Dragoon. She should be able to draw on Michael's power, right?
Nothing.
-Damn!- Her mind shrieked. –Maybe a different way…-
Instead of reaching for the present, she reached into the past. Back a few seconds when Michael was calm and everything was almost-normal. His mind had been sane then, the power that she could draw upon. That power was still around her, anchored to her by their mind connection.
-Only one chance. Better make it good-
She gathered the leftover Spirit and wished as hard as she could.
Ah! Sweet, sweet transformation, power running along her veins. Free as wind, pure as music, deep as ocean. She could feel herself changing, relishing the transformation from Human-Dragoon to Dragon-woman. Deep violet and black light, tinged with red. Peaceful, calming, swirling around her. She felt like she could bathe in it forever, living her life in its perfection. Shapeless as the wind, with no worries or responsibilities. Freedom, the ability to float all over Endiness, it seemed like.
But harsh reality flooded back in her consciousness, as it always did, and she remembered.
-I have to find him- She thought, savoring the feel of her wings again for only a moment before flying into the air. She was in a risk, for the hunters might mistake her as a Dragon and shoot her. But it was a risk she was willing to take for her only living friend.
"Michael!" She yelled.
His insanity left a mind trail that she could probably follow if she was a mortal Human. She flew after him, and he sensed her. It became a race of maneuverability as he doubled back and flew back, over the farm. She swooped in a large arc and followed.
When he stopped and turned to face her, she thought perhaps he was gaining back his sense.
But the skin on his chest was pulling open and his ribs rustling.
-No. No. He wouldn't. Not to me.-
And yet he did. Without hesitation, without stopping to think, the black laser came toward her.
Her body took over where her mind wouldn't, gliding upward out of the direct path of the black laser. It was impossible to get further away. Her mind was useless.
The black power barely missed her, just a millimeter away from her right hip. The recoil was more powerful than before and this time she didn't fight it. She just went with the flow. The force was strong enough to push her far, far away, and only Soa would know whether or not she would survive. But she didn't think. All she knew was Michael and his firing the black laser. At her.
She didn't even know when she hit the ground.