Shopping

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Summary: The Professors voted for Snape to do something against his will. Shopping. He is made to shop for each and everyone of the Professors. So when one of them has something odd on the list, what will he do? And what do Harry, Ron, Hermione, and lingerie have to do with it? What is the outcome?

MO/N: Hello people. Welcome to chapter two of…whatever the title says!

Chapter Two: Snowed In

"Err…Sir? Do you need help?"

"Mental or Physical?" Snape thought. "Err…no. I'm just doing shopping for my fellow…staff members at Hogwarts. I must have taken a wrong turn. Sorry." He turned back to the door, and tried to open it. It wouldn't budge. He looked out the window.

"Merlin…" Snape said, his eyes going wide.

"Sir?"

"Merlin of Magic. Err…look out the window." He kind of demanded.

The storeowner looked out the window. Her eyes got big. "That is one bad snow storm."

Snape looked at her, his eyebrow twitching. "That is the snow."

She gave him a confused look, and then in one swift movement, she jumped over her counter and out a door that was on the other side of the cash register. You could hear thundering up steps, then a loud,

"MERLIN!"

-----

Professor McGonagall was doing a head count of her students who went to Hogsmeade.

"Ginerva Weasley!"

"I'm here!" Ginny shouted.

"Ronald Weasley?"

No answer.

"Weasley!"

"I'm here!" Ginny shouted again.

"No! Ron! Where is your brother?"

"Don't know. Don't care." She said angrily.

Professor McGonagall looked around the room for the tallest boy. He wasn't there.

"Harry Potter?"

No answer. "POTTER WEASLEY!"

There was still no answer.

"LONGBOTTOM!"

When she saw Neville, she let out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "You went to Hogsmeade am I correct?"

"Yes." He answered, running a hand through his hair. He hated being interrogated by McGonagall.

"Did you see them, by any chance?"

"Err…we hung around a bit…yeah."

"Did you see them leave?"

"Err…no. I had to go with Luna."

McGonagall made another scan. She didn't see Hermione, so she decided to check the Library.

"Just stay in here. We're getting the portraits cleaned."

The students exchanged glances, as she left, but they decided to abide her order.

----

McGonagall searched the Library for Hermione. Madame Pince said she didn't even see her that day. McGonagall looked out the window and noticed that the snow was coming down pretty hard.

She went back out into the corridor and saw Fred and George. They were covered in snow and red in the face.

"WEASLEY!"

She paused. "WEASLEY'S HAVE YOU SEEN POTTER, GRANGER, AND WEASLEY?"

"Err…no Minnie. We saw Professor Snape leave though." Fred said.

McGonagall didn't even take notice at the pet name. "Oh dear…"

She quickly walked to Professor's Dumbledore's gargoyle. "BEAVER SKINS!" She shouted.

The gargoyle jumped and allowed her to go up. She didn't even wait for the stairs to start moving. She ran up them, and into Professor Dumbledore's office. Dumbledore was staring out the window.

"ALBUS! WE CAN'T FIND THE TRIO!"

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BB/N: This was a really long chapter. Thanks for reading it!

MO/N: No! We have to add more! What about the people in Hogsmeade?

BB/N: Oh fine! Get on with it!

MO/N: What do you mean by that?

BB/N: Shut up!

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The storeowner came downstairs and was back inside the shop. Snape saw Ron, Harry, and Hermione on the floor. His eyes…got huge…his jaw clenched…and he was angry.

"Potter, Granger, Weasley, get off the floor."

They all stood up, Harry rubbing his chest, Hermione fixing her pant legs, and Ron with a bra on his head.

"Ron! Ron…head, head, head!" Harry hissed.

Ron looked around, and then felt the straps hit his head. He quickly took it off and threw it over his shoulder, putting his hands behind his back.

"What are you three doing here?" Snape asked.

"This is a woman store!" Ron said, stating the obvious.

"What are you two doing here?" He asked again.

"I needed to get something…personal…and I don't have socks on!" Hermione said.

"And why don't you have socks on?" The storeowner asked.

Everyone turned and looked at her. "Who are you? If you don't mind me asking." Harry said.

Ron looked at her, staring fixedly. "You look like Madame Rosmerta."

"Oh you know her? Of course you do! I mean she works next door. I'm Emily Rosmerta! Her sister!"

There was silence.

Snape's POV

She's pretty…wait! Why am I thinking this?

Out of Snape's POV

Emily has black hair, with blue natural highlights…that were very distinct. She has almond shaped dark blue eyes. She was tall, just an inch or two shorter than Snape himself…however tall he is…lets just say she's 6'3. You couldn't tell by her hair that she was in any relation to Madame Rosmerta…but she was. She had tan skin…which as uncommon in England because the weather.

Nobody knew Madame Rosmerta had a sister. But Hermione turned to Ron. "How can you recognize Madame Rosmerta like that!" She snapped her fingers when she said, "that"

"Mione! Why do you think I recognize her like that! I don't think of anyone like that other than…someone!"

"And do you know who that someone is? Rosmerta!"

"Err…that's my sister."

Snape looked at Harry, then Hermione and Ron.

"Rosmerta! Rosmerta! Rosmerta!" Hermione yelled.

"I DO NOT THINK OF HER LIKE THAT MIONE! THAT IS ABSURDIDLY NOT FUNNY AND NOT WITH ME RIGHT NOW!" Ron shouted.

This lost everyone…except Hermione. "DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT RON! I KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!"

Ron and Hermione glared at each other.

Harry shrugged his shoulders. "So, were stuck in here Madame Emily. Is there anyway to floo?"

"Err…sure. Everyone, lets go upstairs." Emily said.

Everyone went through the door, Emily leading the way and Snape in the back. Harry was between Hermione and Ron, who were still having a silent argument.

Emily opened another door out of many doors in the hallway. It was a kitchen. It was small and cozy, just enough room for five or six people.

"Your fireplace has been over flowed with snow." Snape pointed out.

Emily pulled out her wand from her pants pocket. "Incendio!"

The snow melted, but more replaced it. After several meager attempts Emily cleaned up the water on the floor and looked at Snape. "Why don't we try apparating?"

"I don't have my wand." Snape said.

Ron eagerly pulled his out. "I'll try." He wanted to get as far away from Hermione for the time being.

Ron apparated away, and they wondered if he made it. Then they heard stomping up the steps. Ron opened the door. "It didn't work. I tried apparating to the outside of Hogwarts."

Emily sighed. "I guess you're stuck."

"No." Snape said.

Snape went to a window and tried to open it. It was iced shut. "No. Please no. Stuck in a building…with three teenagers. No, please Merlin no." Snape muttered.

Emily thought for a moment, "I guess we should make something for dinner."

"I can't cook." Hermione announced.

"I don't want to cook." Harry said, remembering the times when he had to cook for the Dursley's.

"I love to cook!" Ron said.

Emily led Ron to her Muggle fridge. Harry, Hermione, and Snape sat at the table and watched Ron and Emily take things out of the fridge.

"Now…err…what are your names? The lot of you."

"I'm Hermione Granger."

"I'm Ron Weasley."

"And I'm Harry Potter."

"Oh, I knew your mum. I know your mum also Ron. Now what is your name?" Emily said, turning to Snape.

"I'm Professor Snape." Snape said, leaving it at that.

Ron could have sworn there was a blush on her face. But he ignored it.

"Now we have to reserve food for tomorrow or whatnot."

"No we don't." He said, pulling more and more out of the fridge.

Emily cocked her head to the side.

"We'll have plenty of leftovers. Plus Mione knows how to conjure up plenty." Ron said, hoping to get on Hermione's good side. It worked.

"Why thank you Ron!" Hermione said, with a smile.

Harry coughed. "Flirter."

Snape smirked, and Emily laughed, but covered it up with a sneeze. Ron and Hermione were the only ones who did not get it.

-----

"And then mum told me no!" Ron said as he ate some more of his pie.

"Are you serious?" Emily asked.

"Honestly. I don't lie."

"Then what was the story about?" Snape asked, actually enjoying himself…with three teens and a pretty witch.

"It was the 'talk'. I was supposed to lie!" Ron said.

"At least you got the 'talk'. I had to learn by myself…"

Everyone turned and looked at Harry. "I meant at school! Primary School. In a room full of guys…like me."

"Abnormal?" Snape asked.

"Ye- No!" Harry said, dropping the subject and continuing to eat.

Hermione turned to Ron. "What did you do to Ginny that made her so angry at you?"

Ron thought. "I accidentally burnt a picture of Harry…and then I yelled at her and told her to ask her boyfriend for another one."

"Why would I be carrying around a picture of myself?" Harry asked.

"I know people who do that. A man…Guilderoy or something? Lockhart. He's in St. Mungo's. Crazy old coot. Thinks everyone needs to have a photo of him." Emily said.

Ron nervously laughed, since it was his wand that made him crazy.

"I don't want to sleep with woman's knick…where are we sleeping?" Harry asked.

"Hmm…there are two bedrooms in this building. Hermione why don't you sleep in my room, and you three can sleep in the other one."

Harry, Ron, and Snape stared at each other.

"All right!" Hermione said, enjoying the guy's discomfort.

"Then it's settled." Emily said happily.

BB/N: All right! This one has lots of dialog. Anyway, I hope you like it. I'm listening to an annoying song. "Drop It Like It's Hot" By Snoop Dogg. It bothers me but…I guess I'll listen to it.

MO/N: Till next Chapter! See ya later!