Summary: The Professors voted for Snape to do something against his will. Shopping. He is made to shop for each and everyone of the Professors. So when one of them has something odd on the list, what will he do? And what do Harry, Ron, Hermione, and lingerie have to do with it? What is the outcome?
BB/N: Snape touched Ron. Snape touched Ron. Snape touched Ron...
Chapter Six: "They were nice people"
Ron sighed. "I've liked her for a long time yeah, please don't tell her. Like on test paper saying, "You got this right, but Weasley likes you" or something. It'll kill me!" Ron said in despair.
"If you annoy me enough I will."
"Dear God. I'll have to leave Hogwarts."
Snape smirked. "Why don't you ask her? I mean, she likes you too."
"No. Never, I mean, we're friends, and the friendship is nice. I like it. If she didn't like me, then we probably wouldn't be friends anymore, and it would be terribly uncomfortable."
Snape stood up, and put away his cup. He squeezed Ron's shoulder. "Risk it." Then he left, stepping over the bed…again.
Ron took a deep breath. His mother didn't even know he liked Hermione that much.
-----
"Harry, Ron, and Hermione were such nice people." Dean said, slowly.
"How can you say that? We don't even know if they're dead!" Pavarti said.
"How can you not say that? They were nice people. Except…you know…when you get on Harry's bad side and Ron just happens to be in the room…" Seamus said.
"Shut up Seamus. They are nice people, not were. Stop using past tense." Lavender said.
"But, even Fudge said if we don't find them in two days, they'll be announced dead." Dean said.
"Fudge is an old coot." Lavender said.
"He doesn't know anything. He should be knocked out of office and thrown into Azkaban." Pavarti added.
"She has a point there." Dean muttered.
"Well, if we don't find them, hypothetically speaking, we must buy caskets, and burry them. Luna can play the organ…if she knows how." Seamus said.
Dean, Lavender, and Pavarti glared at Seamus.
-----
Ron laid down, closing his eyes tightly. He was so embarrassed that he could…die. He felt himself fall asleep.
Snape sat up, alone, on the floor, covered in blankets. His room smelled like oranges and limes. It was a nice smell, and Snape found it soothing.
But, he was hoping Ron forgot about the entire conversation by morning. He doubted it, but he hoped he did.
In the morning…
Harry and Hermione woke up at the same time…in an awkward position. There noses were barely an inch apart. Hermione was lying on Harry's arm, and her arm, was draped around his waist.
Hermione screamed, making Harry roll off the bed, and hit the table. Ron who was woken up by the scream, jumped, and hit his head against the doorframe, knocking him out.
Snape and Emily flew threw there doors, and ran into the kitchen. They saw Ron's bleeding figure, Hermione's quick breathing on the bed, and Harry on the floor, face down by the table.
"Dear…what happened?"
"I don't know." Hermione cried out.
Harry rubbed his chest again, as he started looking for his glasses. He sat on the bed, his back facing Hermione. Hermione calmed herself down, and realized Ron was unconscious. She rushed to his shallowly breathing form. "Ron, Ron, wake up. Wake up."
Ron didn't wake up. "I KILLED RON!" Harry shouted.
Snape stared at Ron a moment. By his right temple was a gash, and a bruise. That was where he hit his head on the doorframe, knocking him out.
"Snape! Fix him!" Hermione declared.
"I can't. I am not a trained Healer."
"You're not trained. Exactly, you're halfway there." Hermione said.
Harry picked Ron up, with wandless magic, and set him on the table. It was just big enough for his knees to his head tofit.
"I have a muggle American medical kit." Emily said.
"Go get it." Snape demanded. "Please."
Emily ran out of the kitchen and into her bathroom. She pulled out a white box with a blue lid out of the large medicine cabinet. She ran back into the kitchen and gave it to Snape, who in turn gave it to Harry, who in turn, gave it to Hermione.
"I can't do this. It's Ron!"
"Shut up Granger. Inside that box there should be a bottle of water. Take some large cotton balls, and dab around that cut, and clean around it."
Hermione quickly did as Snape said, and she realized Ron…was lucky to have a Professor to keep her in check.
"All right, in a black bottle I think, there should be peroxide. Can you hand that, and four large cotton balls to me?"
Hermione carefully did as she was told, and slowly, they cleaned Ron's face up, except a bruise that was on the side of his face.
"Wow, Ron got bloodied up…badly." Harry said, walking to them.
"Quiet Potter!" Hermione hissed. Harry backed away. Snape had the sudden thought that Hermione could be a Potions Master. But the thought disappeared just as fast as it came.
Now Snape hoped that Ron had his memory, but forgot about their bonding from the night before.
Ron slowly started to stir.
"I DIDN'T KILL YOU!" Harry exclaimed
"Why would you bloody do that in the first place…Oh Snape have you apolo--"
"Weasley, how do you feel?" Snape's hopes and dreams went down the drain.
Ron temporarily forgot his question, "My head hurts…Can someone get my mum? She could fix it…I want my mum…" He said trailing off.
"I think he's had some head trauma…" Emily suggested. Everyone agreed. Ron sat looking at the ceiling.
"Well…anyone up for breakfast?" Emily asked.
"I'm not hungry…" Ron said, still looking at the ceiling.
"I'm worried…Ron always is hungry…" Harry said.
"It was probably that tea." Snape said. Everyone stared at him.
"Err…tea? What tea?" Harry asked.
"Last night he was drinking tea." Snape said simply.
They left it at that, and set Ron on the bed, so they could eat.
"Hey! My head has blue things on it…it hurts…" Ron said.
"How does he know he has bruises on his face?" Hermione asked no one in particular.
"Cracks! In the ceiling!" Ron sang. Everyone concluded that Ron was just a little messed up right now, and needed some rest.
Emily, and Harry found some cereal, muggle cereal, Lucky Charms, Coco Puffs, and some Honey Nut Cheerios.
They loaded up on sugar. Well, except for Snape and Emily, they had some Cheerios. While Harry and Hermione were talking happily, a little too perky, at the other end of the table, Snape and Emily sat at the other end.
Snape looked up, but Emily turned away. Making a 'humph' sound. He set his spoon down.
"Emily," Snape started. Emily glared at him, a real bad, scary, glare. It was even worse then his. He couldn't even compete with it. "I'm…" 'What did Weasley say?' "Sorry for yelling at you." He looked up again, and she looked like she was going to cry.
"I'm so sorry!" She exclaimed, running over to give him a hug.
'What did Weasley say? No giving hugs? No, no, no! Hug back!' He thought, and he wrapped his arms around her. Patting her back awkwardly.
"It was my fault!" Emily cried.
"No! No it was my fault." Snape said reassuringly. Emily let go, and sniffled.
"I'm sorry… what is your first name?" She asked.
"Severus." Hermione called.
"Severus!" Emily finished. Snape glared at Hermione, who went back to talking to Harry.
"Great golly-wholly good job Snape! Thought you had it in you!" Ron called while rocking his feet, and giggling.
"I think he's delirious." Emily concluded. Snape agreed quickly.
-----
"So Professor, that's what Seamus plans to do…" Dean concluded. Dumbledore thought this funny, a little.
"So you plan to give them a memorial service… That would be nice… Although I hope we find them…" Dumbledore said. Dean nodded. He too hoped that Seamus's idea wouldn't be needed.
"Well, Professor… Is there anything I could do for you?" Dean asked.
"No… well… could you find some lemon drops for me? They take away stress…" Dumbledore asked. Dean saluted him.
"I'll be back!" Dean announced. Dumbledore smiled humbly at him. Dean was such a nice boy.
"The Weasley broom flyers are back!" McGonagall called from down the corridor. Dumbledore walked quickly to the entrance hall.
"Nothin' Pr-Pr-Profe-Professor!" Bill stuttered. The four of them were almost frozen.
"You didn't need to stay out all night…" McGonagall said.
"Where's Ginny? She's n-no-not out th-there is s-she?" Charlie asked.
"She's with Sirius and Fang in the Gryffindor common room." Dumbledore said. The four nodded, well… I guess you couldn't tell… They were already shaking. McGonagall sent them to the common room, and turned to Dumbledore.
"Percy is going over the Hogwarts blueprints with Madame Pince, and Mr. Filch." She said to him. Dumbledore rubbed his temples.
"PROFESSOR I FOUND THEM!"
BB/N: Snape touched Ron. Snape touched Ron. Snape touched Ron. Snape touched Ron. Snape…touched Ron
MO/N: Ignore her. Although it's quite funny. Have you noticed that it's always Ron who has these awkward moments with Snape?
BBMO/N: BOOYAKA! BOOYAKA!