A/N: Chapter TWO! (I know it wasn't necessary, but heck why not?)

Frodo went off to the burrow so he could introduce his soon to be wife Pumba to his unky Bilbo. When Frodo went inside his house and into the living room, there wasn't much space so he sat on Pumba! Suddenly, Emma Watson bursts in to the scene. "Daniel Radcliffe's mine!" Sarah, Nura, and Saleha also burst in. "He's mine!" they all said in unison. They all started cat-fighting and calling each other rude names.

Bilbo finally says after a half an hour, "Yo my peeps, please do this somewhere else. We in da middle of sumting here." They all look at him confused and then nod their head like idiots, link hands, and start skipping. But then they remember Daniel Radcliffe and start fighting again. Suddenly, Daniel Radcliffe comes when they're all were pooped on the ground with many black eyes and missing hair. "I'm sorry all of you! But I truly love Nicole Kidman!" He leaves and cries like a little girl. (Which the girls find strangely attractive.)"So…" Starts the one named Sarah. "Wanna go kick Nicole Kidman's butt?" They all agree and set out to find her.

Meanwhile, in Moulin Rouge…(song "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend comes up) Nicole Kidman, on her trapeze, sings, "The French are glad to, die-" "There's the fag!" "Yeah, let's get her!" "The French aren't dying lady! You are!" Lots of commotion and fighting. In the end Nicole Kidman is dead.

"NOOOOOO!" Daniel Radcliffe comes crying his eyes out. After a while, he says, "Oh well… always have backup!" he says cheerily! "Tommie!" he snaps his fingers.

Tom Felton enters. "Yes Dannie?"

"I can go out with you now!"

"Yay!" Daniel Radcliffe and Tom Felton leave the scene hand in hand. Leaving behind girls that later go to insane asylums.

ahem now back to our REAL scene.

Bilbo looked at the happy couple (Pumba and Frodo). He was disgusted at his nephew because he thought Frodo could have gotten a more handsome guy than a warthog. But then again, Bilbo always had a soft spot for Pumba, so he winked at him. Pumba, witnessing this, let out a nervous giggle and inched backwards. Frodo smiled sheepishly. "That's cool, Uncle Bilbo! Do it again!" Replay Action Bilbo winked at Pumba again and Elijah-I mean Frodo clapped his hands. "I feel a song coming on! …men on a dead man's chest, yo, ho, ho and a bottle of rum!" and then he got another inspiration. "Stacey's mom! Has got it going on!" Then the song ended and the scene was attacked by pirates led by…the gingerbread man?

"Yes! It is me! Le gingerbread man-" said the gingerbread man!

"Say, what up with the "le"?" asked Pumba. "Well I went to France and some peeps influenced me-but that is not the point." He replied.

Pumba seemed to be attracted to the gingerbread man, so he began to stare at him admiringly.

"Uh…come this way Pumba, I'll show you around!" said Frodo, trying to get Pumba away from the odd gingerbread guy. But then, Frodo then smiled a shy smile at the gingerbread man, having a bit of a crush on him too!

"Wow! I sure do have a screwed up nephew!" said Bilbo, being able to tell that Frodo also like the gingerbread man.

The gingerbread man, noticing Frodo and Pumba's actions, got pretty scared. He ran out of the house screaming, "Tinkerbell! Help me! It's happening again! Why did you leave me? You know I love you!"

Pumba, hearing this, jumped out of the closet he and Frodo were making out in and screamed, "Noooooo! Come back!" He then ran after him and out of the house.

Frodo came out also, confused. But then realized from his little peanut brain of what happened. "sniff sniff but-but I thought we-" but then he also noticed a little late from his peanut brain that Pumba was gone. "I'm so depressed!" Frodo said exasperated. "I'm going to go cut myself!" He leaves. When he got into his room, he saw his uncle and Gandalf the White waiting for him, and Frodo felt a weird surge of love toward Gandalf, although he never felt it before. But the problem was, Bilbo and Gandalf were there far a reason, to tell Frodo they were getting married.

A/N: And the plot thickens! (Huh, plot? What plot?)