Chapter 5
Tears filled my eyes as I walked alone back to the Curtis' house. Two-Bit had just left to go get drunk. It's weird how everything can change in such a short amount of time. I was on the top of the world this morning, but now I'm as low as gum stuck to a bottom of a shoe. It's the worst feeling in the world. How could he do this to me? I though he cared about me, but who am I kidding? My mom doesn't give a shit about me now Two-Bit doesn't either or at least I think he doesn't. I needed something to help my emotions. Then I saw it, Buck's place. I'd just go get drunk, maybe that would make me feel better.
I knocked on the door knowing Buck would be the only one there. It was too early in the day for him to be having a party. He opened up the door and smiled. I grimaced, he made me sick, but I didn't let on to that. He opened the door wider so I could come in. I sat down on the sofa and he sat down next to me, too close for my liking. "You know, I've always liked you," he began as he inched towards my face, "it was only a matter of time before you'd come running to me." He kept getting closer and closer as I tried to back away from him. Too bad I was now lying down on the couch and he was hovering over me. He licked his lips and pressed them against mine. I felt like I was going to throw up right then and there. I tried to push him off of me, but he wouldn't have any of that.
"Now c'mon honey, you know you want it," he said in my ear as he pulled my pants down against my will. I was crying once again. I just wanted it all to be over with. I was crying the whole time and then after too. He kept whispering in my ear and I tuned him out. I just wanted the hell out of there. Finally it all ended when he got off of me.
"Damn, you're good," he said winking at me and then headed to the bath room. Taking the opportunity I had, I threw my clothes on and made a mad dash out the door not looking back. I ran to the Curtis' and stopped when I got to the door. I took a deep breath and walked in. No one was home, so I went and took a long shower. I felt so gross, and I just wanted to wash away the memories. That's when I saw the razor. Maybe that's my way to release the pain. I picked it up and cut deep into my arm, I winced at first, but then it got easier. I finally quit once I felt better and got out of the shower. I threw on a large sweat shirt so no one would notice the cuts although I didn't really think they would care anyway. The rest of the gang would probably turn me away jus like my mom and Two-Bit.