Heero POV

Something was moving in my general vicinity. My soldier training was screaming at me to find out what it was, but I didn't dare to wake up. As long as I stayed in the darkness, I wouldn't have to remember what happened. Soon, the thing left, only to return again a bit later and come closer to me than it had before.

Something was touching me, prodding at me, trying to wake me up. Vaguely, I could hear a voice speaking to me, but I stubbornly chose to remain asleep.

It took that voice going from quiet and soothing to loud and worried to get me up.

"Heero, wake up!" the voice told me in what would be considered the normal volume of speaking. I didn't want to, but I obeyed.

I opened my eyes to see Duo sitting in front of my, looking the same as he normally did, not overcome by rage and insanity. For just a moment, I entertained the thought that it might have all been a bad dream. I smiled, then reached out a hand to touch him and shattered that dream to pieces.

A bolt of pain raced down my back and I was forced to believe the truth. I whimpered and pulled back into myself, curling up and trying to make myself as small as possible. Duo was next to me in a second and I flinched, thinking he was still angry.

"Shh. Baby, no. You know I won't hurt you. Come here," he soothed, pulling me out of my ball and into his arms.

So what if it was a dream? I'd enjoy it while I could.

With that thought, I clung to Duo, holding onto him as tightly as I could. I didn't even realize I was shaking until Duo pointed it out to me.

"Easy, babe. Calm down. Look at you, you're shaking like a leaf. Poor thing. We've got to get you cleaned up and looked at."

Duo lifted me off the bed gently, cradling me in his arms. It hurt just to be lifted, but I knew I couldn't walk. Everything hurt more now, even my ankle had swollen worse. Even as gentle as Duo was being, I still whimpered when he lifted me out of the bed and carried me into the room adjoining ours.

It was the first time I had been in that particular room, my earlier explorations having been interrupted. The room was larger than I had thought. It held a large, above ground, tub filled with steaming water in the middle of it, large enough to fit four men easily. Along the wall was a padded massage table with a cart of towels and oils next to it. The room was generously decorated with plants, mainly small trees and vines. The room itself was covered in wood paneling, the floor was white tile. It had almost a tropical look to it.

"Heero," Duo called, "I'm going to put you on you stomach on this table. Will you be alright?"

I nodded and Duo eased me onto the table. Being on my stomach didn't hurt as much as being on my back, but it was still painful. For a moment, I wondered why Duo would want me there, then he began gently peeling away the sheet I hadn't realized I was still wrapped in. I found out why he was pulling so gently when he started pealing it off my lower body. I had bled all over the sheet, the blood had congealed and stuck to my body. Pulling it off my bruised and torn parts was incredibly painful, I found myself whimpering and wheezing in pain by the end.

"You alright?" Duo asked me quietly, I simply nodded. I was sweating from the exertion it took to keep from screaming, but I was still alright.

"This is going to hurt," Duo warned, before picking me up and lowering me into the steaming tub.

I though my skin would melt. It burned and stung, I let out a gasp and sobbed helplessly as my body adjusted to the water and temperature change. Duo moved in front of me, taking my hand and running his other hand down my back soothingly. After a few minutes, I quieted and Duo dared to move away from me.

I was barely aware when Duo slipped into the water next to me, still clad in his boxers, but I was aware when he took me and cuddled me against his chest, like nothing had changed.

It made the pain just a little bit sharper in my battered heart.

"This changes nothing," he told me and I gaped at him, "I will still protect you. I don't care what those... brutes did to you, you're still Heero."

But I wasn't, was I? I wasn't the same Heero Duo had first met, I was... dirty now. Unclean. Filthy. Soiled. Used. Absently, I scrubbed harshly at a spot of dirt on my arm, like I could wash my soul clean. Duo frowned and grabbed my hand.

"Don't," he reprimanded gently, "You're not dirty. They aren't going to beat you like this. I won't let them."

"But I am dirty!" I cried, unable to hold it inside any longer, "Whether it's blood or filth, I've always been dirty! I'm dirty now! And I'm going to get you dirty too! Let me go!"

I stood and tried to push away from Duo, but he had my wrists in an iron grip and wouldn't let go. In a minute, we were both on our feet, spilling water all over the floor.

"Heero, stop!" Duo commanded in a tone that made me stop before I had even made a conscious decision. I deflated and sank back into the water up to my chin, Duo stayed standing above me. He stared at me for a long time before leaning down and taking my face in his hands, forcing me to look at him.

"Anything that's dirty can be made clean again," he told me solemnly, "We're going to clean you up and everything, the blood, the filth, even what they did to you, is going to come off and be washed away in this water. Do you understand?"

I nodded mutely. Duo never lied to me before. If he said the dirt would come off, then it would, as simple as that.

Duo stood and picked up a rag, lathering it with a sweet-smelling soup, then began washing my arms, gently but thoroughly. Then he moved down my chest, then pulled each on of my legs out of the water to wash my feet and my legs. He washed my hair with strawberry-scented shampoo. He even washed the places they had touched me.

The water was darker as it swirled down the drain, more from the blood than anything. I stood next to the tub and watched it go, feeling clean and pure again for the first time in a very long time. I looked at Duo and smiled, he stopped what he was doing and pulled me into a hug against his bare chest.

It was minutes before he pulled away from me, but I could have stayed like that forever. Gently, he took my hand and led me over to the table and pushed me onto my stomach once agin.

"Sorry about this," Duo apologized.

I soon learned that Duo needed to check my insides to make sure there was no internal damage. It was... not pleasant. I was sore all over and his poking and prodding really didn't help. I was grateful when he finished, declaring there to be, "A little bit of tearing but nothing too serious. You should survive."

"Stay here a second," Duo instructed and I was more than happy to oblige. Duo left the room and I had a bit of time to wonder where he had went before he appeared again, carrying a small bag. I watched as he set the bag down and pulled out a small jar and twisted off the top. I strong scent of herbs wafted from the jar and I wrinkled my nose in distaste.

"What is that?" I asked. Duo grinned.

"Nasty smelling, isn't it? But it gets the job done and the smell will fade in a bit," Duo told me before taking a gob of the paste out of the jar and smearing it all over my back.

"Duo, what are you doing?"

"Just wait a second for it to kick in," he told me. I was about to protest when all of a sudden all of the sore and tense muscles in my back relaxed and went numb. I let out a contented sigh before I could stop myself. Duo chuckled.

"I told you it was good stuff. You were lucky I have a friend around here that makes this stuff."

"Is that where you went?" I asked him, too comfortable to be thinking straight. I began to worry when an answer wasn't immediately forthcoming and tried to cover my mistake, "I'm sorry. It's none of my business, I shouldn't have..."

"No, Heero, it's not that. It's just that... I should never have run out on you like that. And I'm sorry. I wish I could go back and change that whole thing."

"What would you do differently?"

"First off, I wouldn't have let those two bastards live," Duo said the venom in his voice startling me.

"Duo..."

"I stopped before because I saw how much I was hurting you, but if I see those two again I'll kill the both of them in a heartbeat. Maybe I should go and find them when you go to sleep..."

"You stopped... for me?" I asked, unable to comprehend the fact.

"Why else would I have stopped? I'm sorry I pulled you around like that. I can't believe I was so stupid. I'm such an ass sometimes. I just have this horrible temper that I can't control sometimes," he knelt to look me in the eyes, "That's why I left Heero. I was worried my temper would get the best of me and I'd do something really dumb. I needed to cool off for a bit, but I should never have left you like that or treated you that way. I'm so, so sorry."

"I-it's alright," I told him. I was having trouble focusing. The things Duo was saying just didn't compute. He did all that for me? No, it couldn't be.

"What am I doing?" Duo asked, a half-grin back on his face, "You don't need this right now. You need me to get back to your massage."

While I was still trying to dissect and pull apart everything Duo had said, his hands started gently kneading my back and lower body. The lotion had numbed everything so well that nothing hurt and all I could feel was Duo's hands on me. My thoughts began to come apart and slowly, I slipped back into sleep.