Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed. Especially all of you who sat down and read all seventeen chapters, I really appreciate it. A big thanks again to Allison for the beta. Thanks to lysser8312 for pointing out an error I made. It should be corrected now.

Chapter 18

The darkness of night had enveloped the six adults as they sat comfortably in Nathan's backyard. The conversation never ceased. While Brooke and Lucas spent most of the night canoodooling in their own little world, the other four had realized that they had quite a bit in common. This should have been a comforting thought, but for Haley it was the exact opposite.

She liked Peyton. The blonde haired woman was genuine, kind, and incredibly interesting. She had recounted stories about her various trips to Paris and Rome, Argentina and Milan, and various other places her art had taken her. She was exactly the kind of person that Haley would become friends with.

The only thing worse than liking Peyton, was liking Nathan. He was smart and clever. She had been so busy sucking face and throwing heated words at him that she had yet to notice that. It only made things worse. He would talk and she would listen. She would stare, even. He captivated her and there was nothing she could do about it. He wasn't the jerk she had wanted him to be. Deep down, a part of her already knew that, but it would have been so much easier if he were.

And Peyton and Nathan together were really something. They flowed. They finished each other's sentences. There was a genuine and very real relationship between the two of them. It was obvious they knew each other well, that they had spent their lives together, grown up with the other. They had something special. It made Haley feel sick.

She wanted what they had. She and Steven didn't have that, they never had. There was never that easiness or knowledge of the other. They knew things about each other and they got along, but it was dull and somewhat forced. She wanted someone to know her as well as she knew herself, the good and the bad. Steven was her fiancé, but she wanted him to be her friend, too. She wanted to be able to tell him the good and the bad and she couldn't. That's what she had Brooke for and up until tonight, she thought that was okay. She really believed that having a best friend and a lover separately could work, but now she knew it wasn't so. Peyton said her relationship with Nathan was complicated and Haley knew that stemmed from the fact that they knew things about each other. They knew the deep and personal, dark and dirty secrets that the other carried around. That's why they could flow. That's why they were so comfortable. There was nothing hidden between them, not like between her and Steven.

What bothered her most was that she couldn't see them ever having it; she didn't even know if she wanted them to. She would never tell Steven about her days of partying with Brooke. He wouldn't like it and his response would be a lecture. She hated lectures, especially those from him. It wouldn't matter to him that it was before they met. He would judge her. She would judge him for judging her. It's who they were, at least with one another. They had never just been. It made her sad.

"Haley," Brooke's voice interrupted her thoughts. "Can you come with me?"

"Where?"

"Drinks."

Haley shook the previous thoughts from her mind. "Yeah."

The two girls walked silently inside the house.

"What are you doing out there?" Brooke asked shutting the door behind her.

"Nothing. Sitting. Why?"

"You've been spaced out for the last half hour and you look...Well, Hales, you look like crap."

"They're really great together," Haley said finally.

"Who?"

"Nathan and Peyton."

"Is that was this is about? You're worrying about Nathan?"

"No, not really. They seem happy though, right?"

"I guess."

"She finishes his sentences. They have the same stories. He makes her laugh, Brooke. And not flirty laughing, really laugh," Haley whispered to her friend.

"Hales, are you okay?" Brooke seemed worried.

"Steven doesn't do that. He doesn't make me laugh, Brooke."

"Some-"

"He doesn't and he doesn't finish my sentences because he doesn't agree with much of anything that I say. I think you were right." Haley, who had been fidgeting with her hands, looked up at her best friend. Brooke saw the glassy look in her friend's eyes and realized that she was on the verge of tears.

"Do you want to go? I can tell them you're sick. We'll leave."

"No. I don't want to ruin your night. I'll just ask Steven."

"Are you sure?" Haley nodded. "We'll talk about this later?"

"About what?"

"About the freak-out you just had."

"It wasn't a freak-out."

"Then what was it?"

"A moment of clarity."

"Haley, what are you going to do?"

"Something I should have a long time ago. I better get Steven," Haley said walking towards the backdoor.

"You can't, Hales."

"What?"

"Have you really thought about this? I mean, we both know I'm not Steven's biggest fan, but you can't just throw what the two of you have away because you see Nathan and his little girlfriend playing nice. They grew up together so their bond is obviously going to be strong, but just because your relationship with Steven is different than theirs that doesn't mean it's wrong."

"Since when did you start defending my relationship with Steven?"

"I'm not. You need to think about this before you do anything. We'll talk tomorrow, or tonight even. I can leave with you now, but one night is not reason to completely change your life course."

Haley sighed. "Okay, but you don't have to leave. We'll talk tomorrow, but I have to go."

"Do you want me to get Steven?"

"Please." Brooke nodded and gave her best friend a hug.

"It'll all work out, Tutor Girl." Haley smiled at the use of her nickname. Brooke only used it in special moments these days.