Thanks to everyone for the reviews and Alison for the beta. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.


Chapter 19

The sound of the alarm filled the room, signaling another day. Haley, usually excited for work, groaned. This weekend had been nothing short of a nightmare. She'd gone from stressing about wedding plans to cheating on her fiancé and thinking of calling it off completely. She knew asking Brooke for a distraction had been a mistake, but this was unbelievable. She wanted to crawl in a hole, not face the world of journalism.

She was in the kitchen making a cup of coffee before she left when Brooke walked in the door.

"Morning, Hales." It was impossible to miss the smile radiating from her best friend's face.

"I take it your night went much better than mine."

"It was interesting. Did you talk to Steven?" Brooke opened the refrigerator door and pulled out the OJ.

"No."

"Oh, well did you think about things anymore?"

"No." Brooke opened her mouth to comment, but Haley wouldn't let her. "I know what you're going to say. I have to deal with this. I understand that, Brooke."

"I know you do, Ha—"

"It's just that every time I think I know what I want, something happens and I'm completely confused again. Saturday, after Nathan left, I thought I wanted him. Then, I went out with Steven and he made me realize what we had. But, last night just made things more confusing."

"How so?"

Haley sighed. "Now, I'm thinking maybe I don't want either of them. Maybe all this happened with Nathan to show me that Steven's not the one and that's it. I know almost nothing about him—how could I want him? Am I making any sense?"

"You're making perfect sense, Haley. And whatever it is that you decide to do, I'm here for you."

"I know." Haley looked at the clock. "I should get to work."

Nathan caught the scent of pancakes the moment he woke up the next morning and he knew there was only one person who could be responsible for it. He walked through the house, to the kitchen, and found Peyton busy at the stove. She turned around immediately, feeling his presence.

"Morning." She smiled softly and turned back to her task.

Nathan watched her intently and realized that he was smiling. Having her here wasn't the hell that he had originally thought. He didn't hate her like he expected. He didn't know what he felt for her anymore. But watching her now, like he used to, made him happy.

"I hope you're hungry. I think I got a bit carried away." Peyton exposed another stack of prepared pancakes.

"I'm sure I can find somewhere to put it." She smiled again. "It's in the second cabinet, to the left."

Peyton opened the cabinet. "How'd you know...?"

"You always eat honey on your pancakes. Which, by the way, I still think is disgusting."

"It's wonderful," she retorted and stuck out her tongue. "Well, it's all done. Do you want juice?" Nathan nodded and took the plate she'd handed him. "Should I save some for Lucas?"

"I heard Brooke sneak out just over an hour ago, so I have a feeling my brother's going to be sleeping for awhile."

Peyton nodded and sat down at the counter across from him. "She seems nice."

"Yeah. Not much like his type, though."

"Maybe that's a good thing. His type didn't seem to work out so well for him very often."

"True." Nathan took another bite of his breakfast and they continued in silence.

It was just passed three when there was a knock on Haley's office door.

"Come in." Steven, carrying a bouquet of daisies, walked in. "Steven, I thought you had meetings all day?" Haley said, standing up.

"I did, but the last one was cancelled." She kissed his cheek and accepted the flowers. "Are you feeling better today?" he asked, stroking her cheek lightly with his thumb.

"I'm fine."

"I'm glad to hear it. I was starting to worry about you."

Haley smiled faintly. "Don't. There's nothing to worry about."

"Good." He grasped both of her hands in his and looked at her. "I was thinking that maybe we could go out for dinner tonight and talk about what you wanted to do as far as the wedding and everything."

"I'd like that."

"Anywhere particular you'd like to go?"

"Just somewhere quiet."

"Grover's?"

"That's fine."

"I'll pick you up around 7:00?"

"Actually, I have some things I need to do after work. Do you mind if I just meet you there?"

"Not at all." He kissed her softly and exited the office.

Haley ran her fingers through her hair as she fell back into her chair. She picked up the phone and dialed.

"Brooke?"

"Haley?"

"Are you at the apartment?"

"Grocery store, actually. You know there is nothing but bread and alcohol in our apartment."

"I wonder whose fault that is?"

"And she's got her spunk back. So what's up baby girl?"

"I need to talk to you. Can you meet me at the apartment in half an hour?"

"I'll see you then."

Nathan has just gotten back from the gym and was about to settle in for a quick nap when Lucas came in the living room wearing a very serious expression.

"Can I talk to you?"

"I guess." Nathan sat up. "Is Peyton here?"

"No. She's shopping or something. But that's what I want to talk to you about."

"What? Peyton?"

"What's going on with you two, man? Last night was, well, last night was weird and Brooke was...."

"You talked to Brooke about me and Peyton?"

"I tried, she wouldn't." Nathan smirked. "But she did that very same thing and now I really want to know what's going on because I don't want to be caught in the middle of anything. And I don't want you dragging Brooke into any of your crazy schemes."

"First off, there's nothing going on with Peyton. Second, your girlfriend or whatever is completely capable of creating her own little schemes."

"So there is something you two aren't telling me."

"It's nothing you should worry about." Nathan walked to the kitchen and pulled a Gatorade from the refrigerator. Lucas followed. "Seriously, Luke. It's nothing."

"What about Peyton?"

"What about her?"

"Is she staying? Is this just a visit? Do you know what you want? What is going on? I know you say it's nothing, but it's never "nothing" with the two of you."

Nathan thought about it for a moment. "I don't really know. We haven't talked much." Lucas eyed him. "We haven't done that either," he replied, annoyed at his brother's interference.

"She seems to think that the two of you are back together."

Nathan sighed. "I know. She introduced herself to Haley as my girlfriend yesterday."

"And that's another thing. What's going on with her? One minute you're having sex with her, then you're cursing her, then you're inviting her to dinner. You, my little brother, have issues."

"Haley's engaged."

"But you like her?"

"I don't really know her."

"Do you want to?"

"It doesn't matter, Luke. She's engaged."

"You mentioned that already. I know she gets under your skin."

"She does not."

Lucas chuckled. "She does, too. But that's not really the point of this conversation."

"Was there one?"

"Yes. You need to talk to Peyton because I cannot watch the two of you play out that stupid and dysfunctional cycle all over again. You've moved on little bro. I can see that. And I know that you still care for her, but you're always going to. I watched you two last night and it's not the same. The way you look at her, it's not how you used to. You know that and I know that. You just need to tell her that."

"You think you're so smart, but the truth is that you—"

"Tell me I'm wrong." Nathan fell silent. "That's what I thought. Brooke and I are having dinner tonight. You should talk to Peyton while we're out." Lucas patted his brother's shoulder and then started down the hall.

Someone had to get this ball rolling and at the rate Brooke and Nathan were operating, it would take forever. He just didn't have the patience to deal with all the unnecessary drama, so he'd taken control of the situation. Lucas could tell from Haley's behavior last night that she had gotten herself to the next point, but his brother wasn't taking care of his baggage nearly as quickly. There was something to be said for the observer.

Haley was sitting on the living room couch and growing more nervous by the second. She knew what she had to do and the truth was, she'd known way before Nathan had ever entered the picture. Steven was safe. He was comfortable. She knew that he loved her and on some levels she loved him, but not in the kind of way that makes you want to spend the rest of your life with someone.

"Hey Babe," Brooke said walking inside her arms full of groceries. "Could you help a girl out?"

"Oh, yeah. Sorry." Haley took several bags from Brooke and walked into the kitchen.

"So you want to tell me what this mid-afternoon chat is all about?"

"I'm going to break up with Steven." Haley answered steadily.

"Are you sure that's what you really want to do, Hales?" She nodded. "Not that I'm disagreeing with your decision because I'm not, but do you mind telling me why?"

"You remember our junior year after Jake and I broke-up?" Brooke nodded. "I was completely heartbroken and you told me that it would be okay because we had our entire lives to find that perfect someone. We didn't have to do it at sixteen. We were lying on my bed and you described exactly how it would be. He would make my heart race every time he walked in the room. Shivers would travel through my body at a simple brush of his hand. I wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything because he would always be invading my thoughts. And not just in the beginning, it would be everyday. It would never fade. Because when two people were meant to be together, they would never lose their luster. True love never grows old or tired or boring. It doesn't fade and it doesn't hold standards. It doesn't stray and it doesn't question. It's just there. It's something you feel so strongly that all rational thoughts just don't matter because you believe in that other person and their love so much that your brain never has to enter into the equation. And I believed you. I still believe you, Brooke. It made everything okay that day. It made me hopeful for the day that I would finally find that kind of love and it wouldn't matter how long I had to wait because it would be worth it. I love Steven, but never like that, never even close. The things you told me that day didn't describe my relationship with Jake and they don't describe my relationship with Steven. More than anything else in this world, I want to love like that. I want to be loved like that. I just can't settle for anything less. I thought I could, but when it all comes down to it. I just can't do it."

"I don't know what to say, Hales. I can't believe you remember all of that."

"You don't?"

"I do, but I'm the one that said it."

"And you still believe it, don't you?"

"With everything I am. I figure it's the one thing in this world I can ever be really great at."

"Yeah."

"Are you going to tell him about Nathan?"

"I don't know yet. I want to be honest with him, Brooke. I want him to know everything that led up to this, but at the same time I don't want to hurt him anymore than necessary."

"Is Nathan part of the reason you're doing this?"

"This really has nothing to do with Nathan. He opened my eyes to the reality of the situation. Being with him forced me to see what I didn't want to see."

"Are you going to talk to him?"

"Eventually. I think I owe him an explanation. Normally I would just avoid him, but that doesn't seem possible since you've become completely enamored with his brother." Haley smiled at the happiness that washed over Brooke's face at just the mention of Lucas.

"He is definitely something. We're having dinner later."

"I'm sure it'll go much better than mine."

"It's all going to work out Haley. Eventually you're going to find the one you're meant to be with. This with Steven, it wasn't supposed to happen."