A/N: Welcome to my first fanfiction on I've always been reading great fanfics here and finally got some courage to write my own and post it. This IS my favorite pairing and will most likely be the only one I will focus on.

Warnings: A quick warning: this fic is about the love between two boys, so if you chose not to respect that, please press the back button and continue on your way.

Disclaimer: Yu-Gi-Oh is not my own creation. It's lovely artwork and story belong to Takahashi Kazuki.

Hidden Past

Chapter One: The Meaning of Partner

It's cold.

Abnormally cold.

I curl in the blanket Atemu had handed me before braving his way downstairs. There was no light, but Atemu being the person he is, found this to be no challenge.

After all, he was the one in the dark and cold depths of the Millennium Puzzle for 3000 years. If he can last that long and never utter a word of complaint about it, I can last until the electricity is restored.

True, he has never mentioned the dark world he had to endure. I have seen hints of it in some of the memories he shares with me. I treasure them like they were my own. He shares not many with me and even though I wish to know him better, he refuses. Perhaps it's for my own safety that he keeps them hidden, that he knows something I do not.

It's amazing. Since he has first been able to fully escape the Puzzle, I've learned that what I know about him doesn't even scratch the surface. It hurts to admit that. I've always thought that we were so close that we knew everything about it each other.

Before he left the Puzzle, I made a confession to him.

After, I told him I had understood the response he gave me, but I honestly did not. At least, I didn't at that time. I think I understand now because now I do realize how different we are.

I told him I had fallen in love with him.

He told me I had fallen in love with an image.

Maybe not those same words, but it had the same meaning. It hurt. It still hurts. Especially now that I see how true it is.

I shiver as I wrap my arms around myself, becoming colder with the memory of that day. I think it was then I started to notice all the differences between the two of us. I guess one could call it an enlightening experience. But most experiences I have had included pain, this one was no exception.

I think I have hidden my disappointment and hurt from him well; at least he had never mentioned it.

I wish… that I wouldn't have ever said anything. I know he thinks no less of me… I can feel he doesn't. But something did change that day, besides my moment of enlightenment. Something changed for the both of us.

And I cannot figure out what it was.

He grew more watchful and quieter, as if in deep contemplation. I know I became a bit more distant, but tried to remain close, knowing he meant no harm by what he said. It was hard; our bond was so strong.

That leads me to this night. I had learned about him. I had continued to keep the close friendship with him.

I still love him. Even though I know how different he is than from what I originally thought. I knew now he was not invincible. I knew that he had faults.

The question is: should I tell him now? What if… what if he still believes I do not know him? Will he send me away again? As much as I've endured it the first time, will I be able to endure it a second?

Or maybe I never really know him.

But I suppose that rests in his memories. The ones buried deep in his soul still.

And suppose he does accept my feelings as true, will he return them?

Fear is a powerful emotion. Perhaps we are both held back by it; his fear of his memories and my fear of never being loved in return by him.

I closed my eyes and sighed. Or perhaps my doubt and fear is a sign that we were never meant to be together. I feel the tears threaten to fall. I can't let them. If my emotions are on the inside, they are easy to hide, but I cannot hide the proof on the outside. He is good at reading emotions, but even better at seeing them.

A tear slips past my lashes and I quickly wipe it away, but not before another falls to take its place. Why this night? Why is it tonight I find it hard to control my feelings? I'm thinking too much about it.

'Partner, are you all right?'

I blink, opening my eyes, hearing his voice resounding in my head. 'I'm fine, other me. Just a bit scared.' Truth, but meant to be deceptive. He will think I'm afraid of being alone in the dark,

'I just need to find the flashlights and I'll be right back up there.'

I nod, knowing he would do as promised. 'All right, don't bump into anything down there.'

'I wo-'

I hear a pause. 'Atemu?'

'I… just bumped my leg on the coffee table.'

I couldn't help but laugh. 'I warned you.'

'That you did, partner. I'll be more careful now.'

I hear the playfulness in his voice and smile. 'Good because I don't feel like bandaging you up in the little light we will have.'

'Ah! Found th-'

I sighed and shook my head. 'Same table?'

'…Yes.'

'For someone who says they're accustomed to the dark, you sure don't act like it.' I hear another pause. This one deeper, almost a complete cut off. 'Atemu?'

'Just beside I am accustomed to the dark, it does not mean I like it nor can navigate in it.'

His voice changed. I cross between hurt and anger. I recognized this tone, but this is the first time it had been directed at me. 'Sorry…' I cut off the bond quickly and efficiently. I hurt. I hurt so badly. How can I avoid certain topics if I do not know what they are? It can't be both ways. My tears start again, once again put in my place, but this time able to express my feelings without care. I hear footsteps approaching our room and I bury myself further into the soft blanket, covering my head.

Through the blanket, I see a light focus on me and I shut my eyes. "Partner?"

I don't answer, afraid of my voice. Afraid of what he would say. I feel the bed shift and the light turn off. I feel a tugging at the blanket and pull away. "Please, don't."

"I'm sorry for what I said. You wouldn't have known and I was wrong to talk to you like that."

"That's… not it… you don't understand…"

"Let me understand then."

"I cry… because I don't know… I didn't know… my comment would have that effect." I shake my head, wiping my eyes again. "And you won't let me know."

"My past is dark, there's no way other to describe it. I'm not proud of what I did." I feel another tug at the blanket, but this time I allow it to complete its action. "But… I will share it with you."

I look up at him in surprise. This is the first time he offered to let me see without my prying. I feel him wipe the remaining tears away and look directly into his eyes, making sure I hadn't been hearing things.

"But not tonight."

I sigh and look back down. Of course. So he would have time to prepare. So he would have time to decide what I should see and what I shouldn't. "Forget it…" I mumbled. "It's good the way it is now, other me. I will just have to realize where I stand with you now."

"What do you mean?"

I close my eyes and tighten my grip around the blanket, finding an unbelievable strength behind me now. "Meaning I know now that even as close as we are now, I'm not allowed to see you at your worst when you have seen me at mine. I realize that I will never be more than the one you saved from countless dangers. Even if that danger is yourself."

"That's not true."

I looked back up at him, eyes narrowed at his crimson eyes. "Isn't it? Isn't that the way it's always been? You've always had this barrier between us and I'm tired of trying to bring it down. I keep getting hurt in the process."

The room flashed with lightning. I was able to see the pained look contorting his face and I felt my breath hitch. It was unnatural. Had I judged his statement wrong? Had he wanted the time to prepare himself? "I wanted the time… to explain certain things to you. It was natural to jump to your first conclusion."

I look away, letting the grip go on the warm blanket. "Sorry…"

"It's all right. I deserved that. After all, it is what I've been doing so far."

"Atemu… before you say anything… I need to tell you something…" I close my eyes, drawing myself into a tighter ball. "Long ago, you told me that I loved the image I created of you; that I didn't know you at all. I admit it, I didn't. But since that moment, I had been seeing all these different things about you. Some physical, some mental. But to this day, I still love you. It has changed, but it's still there. I… know you will probably say I still do not know you, but…" I pause and open my eyes to meet his once again, the words becoming harder and harder to find. "I never asked then, but… did you love me as well? And do you still?"

I feel a finger trace my lips and his eyes stayed locked with mine. "Partner, I did love you and I still do." He moves away from me and I hear a sigh escape his lips. "After I show you, you may have other opinions."

I shake my head rapidly. "Never. I've always loved you, other me. Nothing will ever change that."

"So you say, partner. I feel as though I am betting our solid friendship on something so trivial. Love is always changing; breaking apart at certain areas, forming at others. And it's hard to tell the difference between love and lust."

I hear something in his voice. I've never heard it before. It was dark and deep. "Speaking from experience?"

"Yes." He cups my head in his hands. "I don't want what happened before to happen now."

I smile gently and put my hands on top of his. "Atemu… how about we talk all day tomorrow. I don't think current conditions make a good scene. The cold is uncomfortable for me and I'm sure it's pretty late." I look towards where the clock would be glowing red numbers to prove my statement.

"All right, partner." He leaned forwards and placed a kiss on my forehead. "Tomorrow then." He stands up and looks back at me. "I'll get some more blankets for us. Without the heater, it's going to be a cold night."

I smile and watch as his outline exits my room. I sigh and collapsed backwards on the bed. Finally I was going to get answers and maybe this time he will accept the love I have for him.

I feel happiness bubble in my chest at this opportunity. I knew there was nothing he could do nor say that would disprove my love. We had known each other for years; we've been through ups and downs without losing our faith with each other. When he became his own self, our bond had weakened, but this was the chance for at least our bond to repair. Or maybe to strengthen even more than it was before.

I was so enthralled with my thoughts that I hadn't noticed my other's return until he dropped another blanket over my head. I claw my way out from it and glare up at him. "Atemu!"

I hear his snicker and frown even more. "You looked so in thought and you weren't answering when I called your name."

I blush a bit and smiled. "You just gave me a lot of things to think about, other me." I move over to my side of the bed to allow him to get in under the covers as well. I feel him lie down next to me and bring me closer to him. "Atemu…"

"Shh… just… let me hold you tonight…"

Who was I to complain when I felt warm arms around me, calling out to me? I've never been held by him like this. There was a certain emotion that flickered through our souls as I was lying down to sleep.

I've always felt safe with him near; I've always felt happy and light hearted when he said my name. No… not my name. It was what he had called me since we both became aware of each other.

Partner.

One words and thanks to the complexity of my language, there are different meanings behind it. The word is made of two symbols, one meaning 'mutual' and the other meaning 'line.' That was the combination normally used with this word. But since I have discovered my feelings for him, my mind on its own had remembered past Japanese lessons, remembering sounds and all the different ideas that could be brought from them.

My mind always lingered on one in particular. The first character means 'love' and the second means 'a certain one.' I've never fully appreciated the intricacy of my language until my heart fluttered when my mind was figuring out this combination.

With tomorrow just a night of sleep away, I cannot bring myself to sleep. I tell myself the time will pass quicker then if I were awake.

"Partner?"

I smile at the word and open my eyes slightly. "I am unable to sleep. My mind keeps drifting in all directions. I can't help but feel excited."

I heard a deep chuckle that melts my heart and I feel his arms grasp tightly around me. "I wish I could have the same reasons as you do." I feel his head buried itself into my tresses, shaking slightly. "I fear it more than anything, other me. I fear I will lose you to my past."

"Atemu, I promise you, here and now, nothing can drive me from you. I'm attracted to you much as a moth is to a flame. I know it's dangerous, but I cannot help but want to be close." I sighed slightly and shift in his arms to look up at him gently. "If I get burned, at least my once forlorn life had been brightened by your warmth. And there is nothing I would give to change that."

One of his fingers comes up to trace my face. "I have done nothing but put you through more struggles than what life had already offered to give."

I shake my head softly, his hands dropping from my face. "You have done nothing but help me become who I've always dreamed of being. You gave me courage and a friendship so true, I was weary of it. I wasn't aware such a bond could exist. Please don't hate yourself for that."

I see his red eyes blink out as his lashes covered them. "Remember that… when I show you my past, Yuugi. If only you keep in your heart a small bit of that happiness you feel, maybe you won't turn away from me completely. Like yourself, I am drawn to you. The cold and darkness I have felt is washed away whenever you talk to me or look at me. It's addicting. It's like a baby's first breath of air; so sweet and pure that they continue to keep breathing."

I couldn't help but giggle a bit and place my hands on his chest. "Other me, this isn't like us. To speak in metaphors and riddles. We're hiding behind the simple truth; a truth that has kept us apart for so long. Tomorrow… show me your dark past, let me pass judgment before you pass it for me." I smiles softly and reach up to touch my lips to his. Once again, my urge to be near him great. I pull back before either of us could take it further. "And tomorrow will be a start of a new us."

He nods and pulls me close to him. "Now sleep, my partner."

"As long as you hold me, my one love."

---To Be Continued…

A/N: I'm going to try to stay way from using Japanese names (ie: aibou, mou hitori no boku, etc…), but I did decide to make the fact clear that they are communicating in Japanese and so pronunciations do have different meanings (which is where I got off on that tangent about the two meanings of "partner"). If any of you feel confused about that, just let me know and I'll try to explain it better in the following chapter. Thanks for reading and I've hoped you enjoyed this fic so far.

---Yami-Atemu 11-23-04 23:39