Disclaimer: You know the drill. BLAH, BLAH, AND BLAH. Thank you.

Author's Note: I am on a roll. I just finished typing the first chapter of "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's in Her Bed," and now I am starting this. I am having so much fun. Enjoy.

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Stolen Kisses

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Severus Snape watched the smothering steam billow from the shower stalls while he reluctantly took off his clothes in preparation to take an ever-dreaded shower. As it was he refused to use soap and shampoo. The worse he smelled the more people went out of their way to avoid him and the more people that avoided him the happier he was. The only reason he got under the spray of the water at all was because Lucius dragged Snape to the showers with him. Lucius hated being around other guys in the showers, he didn't know how to act.

So instead of trying to learn how to live among them he brings Severus so that he has something to preoccupy him around all the naked guys. The thing is Lucius is gay and his eyes have a tendency to wander. This never went over well with anyone in the shower room so they started to beat Lucius up. The bottom line is Severus only takes a shower so he can protect his friend. That is loyalty.

At the moment Lucius is showering in the stall at the end of the row. The one next to it is free so Snape moves the curtain aside and slips under the ever-running flow of water. The hot stream bites at Snape's pale skin. He remains in there for about half-a-minute before rushing back out and grabbing a towel off the rack. It is fluffy and warm. Snape dries off himself and wraps the towel around his skinny waist.

He walks back out to where he left his clothes and prepares to redress. But before he has the chance a pair of white hands fold across his chest. "Hey," someone softly whispers into his ear. "Hi Lucius," replies Snape, pulling away while at the same time attempting to keep his towel in its current position.

Turing to look at his friend Severus slips on a puddle and falls to the floor with a thud. Lucius bursts out into fits of ringing laughter. Snape thinks Lucius sounds like a girl. "Shut up," he growled getting up from the tiled floor. He grabs his clothes and begins to hurriedly dress occasionally rubbing his sore bottom.

"Come on Sev, it was funny." Lucius pulled his own shirt down over his pale muscular chest. Snape just ignored him.

"Severus you need to live a little, have some fun."

"I am alive," retorted Snape, slipping on his robes.

"Fine, but you can still have some fun. You know fun?" Lucius tied his long blonde hair into a ponytail.

"Lucius I am well aware of what fun is."

"Prove it. Have some." Snape felt his friend's hand on his shoulder. He turned to look into Lucius' pale frosty eyes. Worry played across them.

Lucius leaned forward. "I care about you Sev. The absence of fun in your life isn't healthy. All I want to do is help you." He plants a kiss on Snape's forehead. "I love you," whispers Lucius.

Snape freezes. Did he just hear Lucius right. One look at his face confirms the truth. "I'm not. gay," he says a little shakily.

"So," Lucius smiles, "Maybe you could pretend I'm a girl."

Snape thought that didn't sound to hard. Lucius was always reminding him of girl anyway. 'No he is my best friend.' 'You're his best friend,' squeaked a little voice in the back of his head. Severus looked over at his friend. Lucius' face was expectant. He felt a pang of guilt in his heart.

"I guess we could try it out," mumbled Snape. Lucius squealed with excitement. His arms twined around Snape with a tenderness that had never been there before. Reluctantly Severus wraps his own arms around Lucius using all of the imagination his uncreative mind could muster. 'I am hugging a girl,' he thinks, 'Her breasts are pressing against my chest. My hand moves down to her ass. My other begins to caress her brea.'

"Sev, you're getting hard," Lucius playfully whispers. His own hand begins to slide down Snape's chest and stomach. Severus stands there for a second enjoying it, but when he feels Lucius' hand slip into his pants he pulls away. He looks at Lucius' confused face and then his eyes are averted to the showers. Several guys are standing there, two look utterly disgusted, and another is discreetly fondling himself.

One of the sickened steps forward. He has thick black hair that at the moment is damp and hanging in his face. In a very masculine manner of walk he crosses the room and stands in front of Lucius. Snape reaches for his wand.

"Stay out of this Sev," mutters Lucius. He looks into James Potter's face and smirks. "Yes?" He drawls in a very condescending tone. James just stands there in nothing but a towel and stares meanly at Lucius. They remain locked in a stare for what seems like minutes until Lucius gets bored and turns to leave.

"We don't like FAGS in the same room as us Lucy. Why don't you and your little f*** go to the girls showers next time," James shouts. He turns to Snape. "I always knew you had a problem Snivellus." Severus simply turns around and follows Lucius out of the room. When they are both in the hall Lucius bursts out laughing.

"Did you see their faces Sev? That was great. Potter and Black looked like they were going to die. Lupin was enjoying himself though. We should've finished our show." Lucius doubled over with giggles.

"Life is one big joke to you isn't it?" reprimands Snape, looking all but surprised.

"Sev we don't need to have this conversation again?" Laughter had left his face.

"No I guess not. Actually it is quite funny when you think about it."

"See, I knew you could laugh. Now let's split before those dumb jocks show up again." Lucius draped an arm over Snape's shoulders and led him down to the dungeons.

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Another Note: There I hope you enjoyed. This is going to be my first attempt at a sex only relationship. No emotions, nothing. Thank you for reading.