Author's Note - I'm glad you enjoyed the Wild Child. It's my favourite chapter.
But now it's time the Tracy brothers and their Father got to defend themselves and say a little about Josie! mcj
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
CHAPTER 7 - FIVE GRANDSON'S IN DAMAGE CONTROL
PART 1 - THE FATHER'S APPRENTICE SPEAKS
I cannot believe that I am nearly thirty years old, and have been suffering this "party secret" thing for Dad's sake for nearly two months now. For two months I have pretended to know absolutely nothing about Dad's plans for Grandma tonight and all I can say is this;
"Dad who in the hell do you think you are kidding?"
Not Grandma that's for sure.
I've lied about this whole thing for ages and I've hated every minute of it even though it is for my Father and I always support Dad in everything. I'm the eldest and supporting my Father is my role around here. However I really hate lying to Grandma.
I lie badly too I might say. I sweat and shake and panic. Why? I'll tell you why! I just simply cannot do it and be convincing. Believe me I tried telling her many a good yarn over the years to try and keep myself out of trouble but I've failed each and every time with her. I know I've failed this time too.
I know she knows about this party and I'm also worried sick about how she's been settling the score behind my back for me "stretching the truth".
I know she's been telling you about my life and that worries me for a start because I know she knows too many things about me that I don't really want other people to know.
You never know what Grandma will do to you if she's discontent about something and now that I've lied to her; me, the Grandson who she trusts with her innermost secrets, you can bet she is going to be one disgruntled little old lady around me. That's when she's at her most dangerous. Can you imagine a Grandma ever being dangerous? Well if you can't you haven't met mine.
What makes it worse is that because I'm the eldest, I'm the one she's going to blame for it all and she's probably told more up front and personal things about me than everyone else. There's one really embarrassing thing I hope she didn't tell you and I'm cringing at the thought that she might have. No, not even Grandma would embarrass me like that. But then, maybe she would.
No matter what she won't say a thing to my four brothers. She won't thunder,
"Virgil Tracy ! How dare you look me in the face all these weeks and lie to your Grandma! You're a disgrace to this family!"
She won't say that any more than she'll tell you that he hides paintings of Mom in the attic.
No Sir, she won't say that to Johnny or to Gordon either. She also won't tell you that John got suspended from School for sowing his wild oats with Miranda Mason after smoking two joints in the gym or that Gordon made out with the top swimmer in the United States swimming squad when he was only sixteen and she was almost twenty-two.
She definitely won't say anything to her precious little Alan who's gotten away with murder with her for years and who thinks none of us know that he and Tin-Tin Kyrano have their own little make-out session going on right this minute in his room as I'm talking to you. You only had to see Grandma melt when he walked into the lounge just now swaggering around like he owns the place and arguing the point with my Father.
But she won't think twice saying anything to me though and why?
It always goes back to me being the eldest. I've been suffering that my whole life and not just with her.
My Dad expects more of me than my brothers and so does Grandma.
It's tough sometimes and I've been doing it tough ever since I was nine years old. Ever since my Mom died and Dad broke down three months after that.
Grandma's probably told you about my Mom. My brothers and I don't talk about her much with Dad; actually we don't talk about her at all. It hurts Dad too much and I don't like seeing my Father hurting. I'd rather hurt inside not talking about it than to see him hurt on the outside by having to.
Virgil and John don't agree though. They want Dad to talk about her and so does Grandma. She thinks he'll feel better about things if he does but I'm not so sure.
Dad changed when Mom died. I've never been able to put my finger on what it was that actually did change about him though. He was always the most wonderful Dad to me and he still is but back then he had something different and extra special about him. Something special that made him my "Daddy" not just my Father and I've often felt it was something Mom brought out in him. It had to be because whatever it was, it went into the casket with her and it never came back. Ever.
I've often asked Grandma what she thought that special something was. She says only Mom knew because only Mom could bring it out in him. Grandma told me Dad was never the same after meeting her and never the same after losing her either. He changed when he met her and when she died he changed right back again.
I've always felt sad for my little brothers, not so much Virgil who knew what it was like back then but for Johnny who only really remembers Dad the way he is now. Gordon and Alan never got to see what their real "Daddy" was like anymore than they got to know mom.
I guess being the eldest was good in that respect. At least I got to have a Mom longer than the other guys. Eight years and eleven months was better than four hours eleven minutes like Alan.
But enough about losing Mom. It hurt me back then and it hurts me even now. My Grandma has always made sure Mom is always uppermost in my heart and that I always remember how special she was and how much she loved me.
I am like my Dad . I think like him and I act like him. I look like him too but I guess you have to look like someone don't you?
But Grandma won't accept that. She knows Mom physically exists in all of us.
"He maybe like his Daddy but that curly hair of his was made in England." Grandma would say to anyone who said I looked nothing like Mom.
As for Grandma, I love her more than life itself and I am thrilled she has made it to her seventy-fifth birthday.
However, I want to say some things in my own defence if she has told you the things about me that I think she has.
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE APPLE OF MY PARENT'S EYES
Grandma says I always wanted to be an Astronaut. She will have told you that for sure. She's told everyone that over the years from the milkman in Boston right down to my Commander in the Air Force.
I don't remember ever saying that and neither do I believe it. I look at Johnny and Alan and then picture my life in the Air Force and my love of Thunderbird One. Astronaut? I doubt it. I suffer the occasional co-pilot in Thunderbird Three and that's only because that kid brother of mine is so reckless sometimes, but space has never done much for me not like it did for Dad.
But a love of flying…that's another story. That's something Dad and I do have very much in common. Dad taught me to fly when I was around fifteen. He was a great pilot and a good and patient Teacher. He always praised me and told me how good I was too. The only time I've ever doubted myself was when I ditched my Jet fighter at Langley trying to outdo everyone else in the squadron. Yeah that was the old blot on the military record for me and it made me realise I'm not infallible.
Grandma doesn't know about that much to my relief. I least I don't think she does. She hasn't said anything and with her you know she knows things by the look on her face. Her face hasn't given that one away yet so I think I'm safe. I hope so. The last thing I want is for Dad to find out about that. I was really relieved when the Air Force made no official statement about my little "accident".
She always tells a lame tale about me being jealous of Virgil when he was small. I don't remember ever looking on Virgil like that. He might have been Mom's favourite but I was Dad's so there wasn't a problem there. I think Grandma got it wrong.
Anyhow I'm supposed to have taken Virgil's diaper off and somehow made him "forget" himself and wet all over my parent's bed. If you want my opinion Grandma probably had one too many scotches that night and didn't do the darned thing up properly. She likes a scotch my Grandma and don't let her ever tell you otherwise.
Then there's the story about when Gordon was born. She thought I was a genius back then because I knew where I lived and Dad's telephone number. Heck I was seven years old and had two little brothers and another one about to be born. You had to have your wits about you then. Mom was always scared about losing one of us in the shopping centre and every single time we went to the shops she'd ask me the same questions in the car.
"What's your name?"
I'd say "Scott Jefferson Tracy."
"Where do you live?"
I'd say "550 Paramount Road."
"What's Daddy's mobile telephone number?"
I'd say "0414815237."
"Where's Daddy today?"
I'd look at her blankly for today's update. He was in a different place most days with his business and you never knew what the right answer was unless Mom told you.
"Daddy's in New York today" she'd say firmly. "So what do you do if something happens to Mommy or your little brothers?"
I'd say. "Stay calm and tell the policeman my name, where I live, tell him Daddy is in New York and give him Daddy's mobile telephone number."
"Good boy." she'd say and run her hand through my hair. So Grandma I wasn't actually a genius. Mom programmed it into me several days a week and luckily when Gordon was born it came in most useful.
It was nice to think Grandma thought I was genius anyway. She has always thought highly of me and that's reassuring but after the party secret comes out I might not quite be as popular in her eyes as I think. She won't forget about that and her memory is a long one.
I too have a good memory just like Grandma. I'll bet she thinks I can't remember a conversation we had one night when she took Virg, John and me out to a movie. Grandma had been sent to take us out so Mom and Dad could be alone.
I was eight then and after three brothers and the occasional glimpse of my parents naked together after we'd been sent to bed early by Dad for no good reason; I knew what it meant when Dad wanted to be alone with Mom. Alone with Mom meant Dad expected you to stay in your room. You never knew where they'd be if you ventured out... the lounge room when you forgot your security blanket, the kitchen if you needed a drink, or their bed with the door half-open if you needed to go past and use the bathroom.
I was going to tell Grandma not to go back when she said she forgot her purse because I knew Dad would more than likely go mad at her like he went mad at us if we interrupted things with him and Mom. But I guessed Grandma knew they did that sort of stuff and Dad would never go mad at Grandma.
But when she got back in the car looking miffed about what was going on in the house I knew it had to be Mom and Dad that had caused it. So I asked her was Dad kissing Mom without his clothes on again.
She lied and said no. I knew she lied because two months later Mom and Dad had a huge fight about another baby coming.
No-one ever had to tell me how you made babies Grandma so don't think I can't remember what Dad and Mom got up to back when I was young.
I most certainly can.
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
A LITTLE BOY LOST
I know I said I didn't want to talk about Mom anymore and I don't but no doubt Grandma told you about the things that happened to me when she died.
I asked Dad if I could stay at the hospital and help with Mom's arrangements but he said no and sent me home with Grandma. I was so scared I'd lose Dad too back then and I was still scared right up to when I joined the Air Force after College.
Dad let me read at Mom's funeral and I remember feeling like I did something really important for him that day even though no-one really listened to what I was reading. They were all crying too much to listen to me.
Dad was so cut up after Mom died and poor Grandma was trying to do everything she could to make him feel better.
I remember Dad struggling with money and his business and the babies and Grandma telling him he had to let her help. But Dad wouldn't let her.
And then Dad and Grandma forgot my birthday.
Next to Mom dying and losing Addy's love, that was the saddest day of my life.
I really don't think it actually hit me that Mom wasn't coming back anymore until that day.
Mom usually gave us a party on our birthday and we got to play some great games that she devised. We always had a cake and lots of presents even though they were only small and simple things. Mom was mindful of money since Dad's business had been in trouble but she always seemed to manage to find something special for a birthday no matter what. Dad always joined in the games and enjoyed the cake even if he was busy and we all knew he was. We knew how worried he was about the business but didn't understand why. Mom and Dad never told us anything about their money troubles but being the eldest I knew.
That dreadful day that I turned nine, there was nothing.
No party, no games, no cake, no presents.
It drove home the fact to me that my Mom was gone. Gone forever.
At least Virgil made me feel a little better. He played the piano for me even though Dad had forbidden him to do it. I still see him singing to me in the dark while all the while looking towards the door in fear that Dad would hear him and both of us would get a caning.
Even Grandma didn't remember my birthday. That was the only day she's ever let me down.
Dad said something to me when he remembered later. I don't know what jogged his memory in the middle of the night but I remember him coming downstairs in an old T-shirt and pyjama bottoms looking dreadful and sending Virgil up to bed. Luckily he'd finished playing the piano at that stage. All Dad did was cry that he had let me down.
I tried to make him feel better by saying it didn't matter when deep down in my heart it really did. Things like birthdays are important to you when you are a child and even though I was the eldest and I had to help with the others I was still a little boy back then.
Eventually I started crying too and it was more about Mom than the birthday. I asked my Dad why she had to die and he couldn't talk to me about it. Then both of us cried until Alan woke up and he had to tend to him. We still have never talked about it.
Grandma says I never cried about Mom enough and it wasn't healthy for a child.
She was always trying to drag my emotions out of me but like Dad I kept them inside unless I was by myself.
Well Grandma you would have been seen me crying on my birthday if you'd remembered it and rest assured I've shed many private tears in my room over the years because I didn't have a Mom when it counted.
Mother's days at school; when I graduated from High School; when I finished College; being decorated in the Air Force. She would have been so proud of me following in Dad's footsteps.
But as I said I don't want to talk about Mom anymore. Why do I keep thinking of her then when it's Grandma I'm telling you about?
It all goes back to Grandma never letting any of us forget her.
Even though Dad has tried to forget her for years, it's never really worked for any of us. Grandma says we must never forget. I wish Dad accepted that.
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE TEENAGE HEARTBREAKER
Grandma always referred to me as a teenage heartbreaker because of the number of different girls that I brought home from school when I was in High School.
She never let up at Dad about making sure he'd told me enough about women and life. I wanted to remind both of them that Dad had done that quite graphically already when I witnessed him with Mom.
If Grandma thought I didn't know what to do she was sadly mistaken and if she thought Dad hadn't told me himself she was wrong about that too. Dad had told me all right but I think I learned more watching him at seven than listening to him tell me at thirteen.
I must admit I enjoyed being popular in High school. I was tall and very like my father to look at and I suppose being the eldest son of a billionaire made the girls like me. Not that being wealthy made any difference in our home. Grandma wouldn't have it.
She expected that the five of us behaved like normal youngsters as she put it and that meant to her that we were polite and respectful and didn't think our place in life was above anyone else. So it always came as an embarrassment to me if someone mentioned with surprise that I was a nice young fellow given I was a "rich kid".
I loved confusing Grandma with the girls I brought home. Not that I had to try hard to confuse her. She had a terrible head for names and faces unless that particular name or face did something to make themselves memorable in her eyes. I was constantly in damage control when she called my latest flame "Candy" when her name was really "Ellie" especially when Candy was Ellie's best friend. Grandma has a lot a talent in fact finding and interfering but she should have learned to keep quiet when it came to my girl-friends.
When I started bringing girls home to meet Grandma I was fourteen. I knew the fact that I was only fourteen ruffled her feathers enough let alone the fact that some of them were quite "well developed" for their age.
"You mind yourself Scott Tracy." she'd say pointing her wooden spoon in my direction. "With those looks of yours those girls are like metal to a magnet. Don't you go thinking of trying anything I'll not be pleased about."
Well I'd been thinking about trying it I had to admit. The things Dad told me were physically going to happen to me had happened and I felt up to the task but the fact that Grandma might find out held me in check for nearly two years.
Then I met Adelaide Reynolds. Addy; the girl who turned me into a man.
She came to our school as a transfer from Ohio. She was gorgeous. I remember staring at her blonde hair and blue eyes in history and dreaming about a first time with someone who looked like her so much so that I wasn't going to be able to get up at the end of the history class without disgracing myself. I ended up getting into big trouble with my Teacher for not paying attention in class.
I felt like saying "Miss Hind. I'm thinking about making my own American history. Don't expect me to care about the Boston Tea Party when I'm planning my own."
Well Addy was the one I chose and I set about making sure that she didn't want to say no when the time eventually came. I was fortunate that she seemed to like me without too much effort on my part so I was part of the way there. After all I was Scott Tracy, tall, blue-eyed, dark-haired, High School football quarterback, a man of the world. That's how I portrayed myself back then. Most of it was true. I just wasn't a man of the world yet, but I was working on it. Boy was I working on it.
Over the next few weeks we spent a lot of free time together mainly in recesses. It grew to the point that she would be waiting for me at the cafeteria each lunch hour and we would share lunch together. One day I even grew bold enough to take her hand across the table. I imagined this was what you needed to do if you wanted a woman the way I wanted Addy. You could see her eyes shine and her whole face light up after I did that. I was relieved. I hadn't been sure if it was the right thing to do.
You see whilst I witnessed the act between my parents when I was younger, I'd never witnessed what had essentially led up to it. How did you in reality persuade someone to do that with you of their own free will? Now it's pretty darned obvious I couldn't ask my Grandma that question and imagine what would have happened to me if I'd have asked Dad's advice!
Well the next step was asking her if she'd like to catch the bus home with me to do some homework. That would get her into my room at least. I offered for Grandma to drive her home after we had finished studying. She didn't look too keen about coming over to our house.
"Why can't we go to where the other kids hang out?" she asked. "They all do their homework there."
I had to lower my head and admit to her that Dad expected me to come straight home from school when I didn't have football practice because I had to help my little brothers with their homework. She didn't look like she believed me so I then had to go through the pain of explaining to her that we didn't have a mother and all the responsibility associated with being the eldest son and being totally answerable for my brothers until Dad got home.
"OK then I'll come." she said and smiled at me. I smiled back; totally smitten. All I saw was that face, those eyes, that body.
I took her hand that day and felt a familiar tingling I'd rather not talk about. Yes Sir, I decided there and then. She was going to be the one. I make a lot of on-the-spot decisions these days in International Rescue but the decision about Addy...it was the easiest and most spontaneous decision of my life.
I swear from the very first day Addy walked through the front door of our house Grandma knew I'd picked her out for that purpose.
Grandma didn't approve of Addy at all even though she never let her see it. The look she gave me though said it all. So it took me quite a while and a heck of a lot of planning to get myself into the position of safety I needed to experience "life" as my father had demonstrated to me as a child.
I had it all planned. It was a Wednesday in the middle of May. Everyone had discussed their afternoon plans with Dad at the breakfast table. Dad always insisted on that so he knew where we were all supposed to be after school.
Virgil had football practice. John was going to be at the library doing astronomy research. Alan and Gordon had plans to make a new model plane. I knew they always did that under the big tree outside. It was all falling into place. The only person I needed to get out of the way now was Grandma. You may as well ask for the whole of the US army to be stood down as to try to get rid of Grandma of course. The only way was to target one of her few weaknesses. I knew she hated climbing stairs and when she asked me to take the laundry upstairs that morning complaining that her knee was playing up I was extremely sympathetic.
"You need to rest up Grandma." I said but my tone must have had a little too much concern to it as I saw her frown suspiciously. Luckily for me Dad suggested that she would be better off staying downstairs most of the day and when she agreed it was a good idea that was it for me.
I had a clear shot at losing my virginity without being interrupted. Of course it would all hinge on whether Addy agreed. I was pretty sure she would. Things had been starting to hot up a bit between us during our "study sessions".
When you are young, occasions such as this are rather momentous and I could hardly concentrate during my classes at the reality that it might actually happen. Today would give me one up on my brothers. I'd be able to say the old line "Been there, done that" as I did with so many other things. But this … this was the ultimate. I would be like my Father, no longer a little boy in the eyes of the world.
I asked Addy if she was planning to come over that afternoon. Neither of us had any homework but our "study" sessions had become very non-academic the last few times anyhow.
"What are we studying?" she asked mischievously.
"Biology." I winked.
"I don't even take Biology." she laughed, clearly understanding my meaning.
"Neither do I." I replied. "But studying it would be another step in our education Addy."
She looked about her and then said quietly.
"Do you have any protection?"
It was like she had blown me out of the water. She was rather willing it seemed.
"Have you done this before?" I asked.
"Yeah, haven't you?" she asked in return.
Well what could I say? I had to keep my reputation intact.
"Of course I have." I lied.
"So do you have any?" she continued.
"Any what?"
"Any protection?"
"Of course I do." I said.
I'd forgotten all about the protection side of things. Damn it! I knew I had to use it. Dad had made that point to me over and over.
"Protect yourself. Protect the girl." ever since I had been thirteen. I hadn't had the need for it until now and now that I did, I didn't have any. I knew Dad wouldn't have any so I couldn't search his room when I got home. There was no way I was going even going to ask Virgil. He was only fourteen. Oh well. I'd just have to go to the drug store myself in free class and buy some.
Well going to that drug store that day was more stressful than any rescue I've ever been involved in. I didn't go to drugstores and didn't even know where to look for what I needed. Worse still was the fact that the drug store was owned by Candice Paterson's father and he was the one serving at the counter. Remember Candice ? She was one of my ex-girlfriends; the one Grandma mistook for Ellie all the time.
"How are you Scott?" he said frowning disapprovingly at what lay before him on the counter as I searched my pocket for money.
"I'm fine thank you Sir." I replied trying not to look embarrassed.
"You don't see Candice these days do you?" he enquired as he rang the sale though. I knew what he was getting at when he asked that question.
"No Sir." I replied. "Candy is seeing my friend Rob now."
"Can't say as I know him." he mused. He held out the package. "Well then, there you are. Tell your Grandmother I'll see her next week. That new drug I ordered for her should be in for her to collect by then."
My Grandmother? Oh no. I hope he didn't intend to discuss what I'd purchased with her. My life wouldn't be worth living if he did.
Anyway the big moment came when we arrived home from school and there was Grandma sitting in front of the television peeling vegetables.
"Hello darling." she said to me as I kissed her cheek. Her voice dropped a little when she saw Addy.
"Hello Adelaide dear." she said. Her voice wasn't disapproving. It was …oh hell what's the point in pretending here. Grandma's tone was down right disapproving. Grandma knew my plans for that afternoon I swear.
"Hello Mrs. Tracy." she replied.
"How's your knee Grandma?" I asked. "I'm pleased to see you're resting it like Dad suggested."
"My knee is fine thank-you." she nodded. "Do either of you want anything to eat?"
"No ma'am we'll be studying upstairs." I said. "I'll come down and get something if we need it. Err…is anyone home?" I asked trying to sound as innocent as possible.
Unfortunately I didn't see her eyes narrow suspiciously but she came out with it anyway as directly as you please.
"What do you need to know that for?"
Boy life was tough sometimes with Grandma needing to know everything.
I shrugged. "No reason Grandma. I'm just supposed to know where everyone is in case Dad calls."
And with that I took my intended to my room.
Now I'd rather leave the story there and tell you that my first time was a powerful, wonderful and earth-shattering experience and normally I would. I can probably lie to you and get away with it but the longer I've gone on talking about Grandma, the more I know she would have taken great delight in telling you the truth about that afternoon.
I know she knows and I bet she's told you.
I've died inside about this for years because I know she knows.
How did she know? Two pieces of chocolate cake and orange juice near the scene of the crime that's how. Those sorts of things don't miraculously appear in your bedroom do they? Someone had to put them there and I knew that someone had to be Grandma. I definitely knew by the way she looked at me for nearly six months afterwards.
She has this amused smile which tells you in no uncertain way that she has a secret that will humiliate you for the rest of your life if you're not careful. She particularly gives her smile to Dad and to Virgil, goodness knows what they've done to have the honour, and also to me.
I guess I'd better give you my side of the story. It might save me a bit of face I guess.
In our home Dad had an open door policy. You could close your door for privacy all right but you weren't allowed to lock it. The only door you were allowed to lock was the bathroom for obvious reasons.
Naturally the type of thing I had planned for that afternoon could only be attempted in a room where there was a lock. This meant tying up the bathroom and with two little brothers who drank orange juice like there was going to be a shortage any minute, this ended up presenting a big problem.
I'd finally ended up with Addy in the bathroom and we were getting to the business end of things when Gordon pounded on the door.
"I'm in here." I replied placing a warning finger against Addy's lips. "I'll be a while."
"But Scott. I have to go." he complained.
"Use Dad's bathroom then." I called back.
"You know I'm not allowed."
"Dad's not gonna find out." I said becoming more annoyed by the minute.
"He did last time." came the annoying little voice.
"Well come back in ten minutes." I snapped.
"Scott! I'll explode before then."
"You'll have to wait your turn Gordon." I said.
He went away after that and I thought he'd gone to use Dad's bathroom. Unfortunately for me he'd gone to complain to Grandma but at that point in time with Addy in that particular state of undress, I really didn't give a damn what he was doing.
With the interruption, things went back to square one again with me but one look at Addy like that, well it didn't take me long to find the fortitude to continue.
The pivotal moment came and I needed to organise the protection…quickly.
Now I knew I had paid attention when Dad explained it to me and it all looked rather simple to use particularly to someone who was a whiz at physics and mathematics as I was. The truth of the matter was that this was a damn big event in my life and I hadn't done any "homework" on how to use it. Let's leave it by saying that by the time I'd worked out how to get it on, the reason I needed to put it on had well and truly "escaped me". I have never experienced such embarrassment in my life and at the end of it all I walked out of the bathroom to find the cake and the juice in my room near the door to the bathroom. Grandma!
Oh God. I pride myself on being quite a reasonable partner these days but while Grandma lives and breathes I'll always be reminded of that day with Addy and the fact that Grandma must have heard the whole damned embarrassing thing and has never said a word about it to me.
I tell you her silence can be more damaging sometimes than her tongue and this was definitely one of those times.
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE AIR FORCE
Once I finished College I decided to join the Air Force, a decision I made in my own right after a lot of thinking and consideration. Contrary to what people said in the academy, Dad didn't push me into the Forces. Naturally he was proud and happy that I had selected the Air Force as a career and offered to put in a good word for me when required. I nearly exploded when he said that. I was twenty-one with College behind me. I didn't need Dad's "good word" to make it anywhere. I went to say something but held my tongue at Grandma's warning look.
Nevertheless I was emphatic that I would make it on my own and I told Grandma in no uncertain terms that when I did make it I was going to make it bigger and better than Dad ever did. She had smiled and said.
"Of course you will sweetie."
Somehow I felt she wasn't taking me seriously. But I was serious. I could pilot before I'd even joined up so I was already a mile in front of most of the recruits who started basic training with me and I knew it. I had a bit of an attitude about me back then, courtesy of my Father. I knew I was good because he'd told me so and Dad didn't say you were good at anything unless it was absolutely true. So I knew and therefore expected to be a force to be reckoned with in the Air Force. What an eye-opener I got in my first year in the Academy. It was worse than one of Grandma's "reality checks".
I haven't mentioned these yet have I? Well you can guarantee every one of my brothers has had been on the receiving end of one of those from Grandma in their time. Grandma loved us dearly and left the disciplining to Dad but every now and then it all got too much for her. It was then she would storm in to the room like a tribe of wild Indians and say "young man you need a reality check and I'm about to give it to you."
These were words we all grew to dread.
It didn't matter what the situation was; if you had gotten yourself into trouble over something major, she literally held you by the scruff of the neck and lectured you over and over again until you'd rather die than listen to her any more. It was worse than any Chinese water torture could ever be and definitely worse than any pain Dad's canings could inflict. So keep that thought in your mind and think about how bad it was for me in the Forces that first year.
My attitude was taken by the scruff of the neck by my Commander and I was lectured over and over that I wasn't as good as I thought I was. Sure I was the son of Jeff Tracy and I knew how to fly but I still had the hardest part to come.
Living up to the high expectation that went with the Tracy surname. That was hard all right. Most of the Commanders I served under remembered and respected my Father but it didn't stop them continually trying to find fault with me. They viewed me as the cocky eldest son. One mistake and they were on to me. My first year was nothing but totally miserable.
I settled down after the reality check and began to show the same skills, abilities and leadership qualities as my Father. Once I had a bit of experience they could not and did not find the faults in me that they sought. It was then I began to excel. My attitude was gone and my mind was on the job. I quickly began to go through the ranks as Dad had done.
Many of the other guys in my squadron hated me because I was Jeff Tracy's son particularly when I was decorated for valour in the field.
However, while they were seething with discontent I was viewing it all with suspicion Every decoration I received in the service seemed to occur after my Father's name was mentioned somewhere or after he had attended the base for an official function or simply to come to watch me fly. I started to wonder if Dad was interfering at a high level.
I came close to accusing him of it but as usual Grandma has a knack of keeping you out of trouble by being in the wrong place at the right time. That day I was sure she must have been telepathic. I had been chewing myself up inside about a recent decoration I'd received for valour. My Commander who served under Dad said he had discussed that mission with my Father and Dad had said I fully deserved the honour for an exceptional effort in the field.
I was furious and in the end it all became too much for me. I contacted Dad at home. I was ready to have it out with him.But I didn't get Dad.
Grandma took the call.
"Where's Dad?" I'd snapped none too politely forgetting who I was talking to over the televid.
She rolled her eyes at me.
"Your Father isn't here. Scott Tracy look at your face. Frowning like the world's going to end. What's the problem to make you look at me like that then?"
"Dad's my problem." I began angrily.
"I knew you were going to say that" she mused and then continued.
"I guess then that what happened at the base last month has affected you sweetie?"
I looked confused. What had happened? I tried not to let on I didn't have a clue what she was talking about. She shook her head and continued.
"Why your Father refuses to interfere with matters concerning you boys is beyond me sometimes. I don't know why he wouldn't give you a helping hand towards a promotion when he could. I can't believe that when that Commander of yours asked his opinion of your flying abilities he told him to decide for himself. I'm sorry sweetie if that's cost you anything."
"No Grandma. It's OK" I replied. "Dad's never been anything but straight down the line with me."
"Yes he has." she replied looking at me knowingly. "Anything else now?"
"No ma'am." I replied and ended the call. As I returned to the base I shook my head at how that call had exonerated Dad. She knew I was going to say something. I swear she knew.
But that's my Grandma. One step in front of everyone all of the time.
My time in the forces was also a time when I found personal and physical fulfilment.
Adelaide and I met up again in Nevada. It was a case of we must have been meant for each other I think. Fate had destined us to meet that day in High School. Fate had brought her to my home for the biggest and most embarrassing moment of my life, and now fate brought her back to me in the form of a legal secretary working for her Father's huge engineering firm in Nevada.
We re-kindled our relationship one cold Friday evening when I'd gone into town to have a few beers with a couple of my buddies. When she walked in with her friends I had to pinch myself a few times to believe that it was really her. I couldn't believe my luck. Adelaide Reynolds; still blonde, still beautiful, still captivating, and after a few hours of Tracy charm…still willing to be mine.
She told me she wanted to resume the relationship as I lay with her that night after making long and passionate love. That night had been a bit more successful for me than the first attempt thank goodness although she didn't let me live that down for a long time.
I knew she was impressed that I was now in the Air Force and flying through the ranks and it reminded me of what Dad had told me about his chance meeting with Mom in London.
Dad had said he met my mother when he was on the verge of leaving the Air Force to join NASA. He said that he always felt my mother had been impressed with him being in the Forces and that had been the catalyst which resulted in her coming to the States to be with him.
Grandma gave us a totally different viewpoint of course. She said Dad's description of things sounded like an advertisement to get young men to join the Air Force. Grandma then cleared things up by saying Dad had been smitten with Mom from the moment he saw her and Mom had been pretty much the same. From what Grandma said Dad could have been penniless and Mom wouldn't have cared and she could have come over from England armed with a machine gun and he wouldn't have noticed. All they had ever seen was each other.
"Scott your Father is living proof of where there's love in a man's heart nothing stands in the way." she said with wisdom. "And as for a woman loving a man...well your Mother leaving her family and country is evidence enough of that."
I wondered for a while whether or not history looked like repeating itself. Fate had destined Mom and Dad to meet. Surely only fate could bring Addy back to me in Nevada.
After a few months, I asked Addy to move in with me. I didn't feel the love Grandma said Dad had felt for Mom but we still had a good relationship all the same.
I kept my relationship with Addy and the fact that we were living together very close to my chest. I didn't tell Dad or any of my brothers. I didn't even tell Grandma at least not for a while. I had only ever had one close relationship with a woman in my life and that had been with my Mother. I had loved her unconditionally. I kept telling myself that I would grow to love Addy unconditionally too and the fact that I hadn't yet had to be my fault. I guessed I needed time.
Addy didn't seem to mind the way things were. We had a physical chemistry between us that was dynamite and the loving was satisfying and good. She was materialistic and I could afford to give her the things she wanted to be happy. We laughed often and went everywhere together. But I knew something was missing from the home we had made together.
Love.
I loved her in the physical way. I couldn't live without her emotionally either. I just didn't love her. What I felt for Addy was not the love I knew my Father had felt for my mother. The love I witnessed being expressed in one way or another every day of their married lives. Little things Dad used to do like steal a kiss from Mom when she was trying to cook dinner or tuck a stray curl behind her ear as he spoke to her. I had the best possible role-model on how to love a woman properly yet I did none of that,
It was then a chance telephone call from Grandma made me realise what stopped me from loving Adelaide Reynolds.
Grandma telephoned me often and our discussions went backwards and forwards from how my youngest brothers were coping with High School, to Dad's business, to Kyrano's new experiments in the kitchen, to me.
Grandma was now on a mission of procreation. She wanted a great grandchild and it was me she was after to do the honours.
"You should be finding yourself a pretty little girl and raising your own sons." she told me. I knew I was nearly twenty-eight, two years older than Dad had been when I was born.
"Grandma the last thing I need in my life is changing diapers and feeding bottles to babies again." I told her. Despite how the years had passed it only seemed like yesterday that I was feeding Alan his bottle the night my Dad broke down from the stress of Mom dying and his failing business.
Grandma didn't look convinced. I decided to come clean.
"I'll only tell you because I know I can trust you. I'm taking things slowly and don't want Dad or the guys to know yet. Grandma I am seeing someone. I've been seeing her for a while. It's pretty serious."
Well if Grandma was able to knit I was sure she would have started on the baby booties while we were still talking on the televid.
"That's wonderful news!" she beamed. "Before long you'll be talking marriage and babies young man."
I smiled at her. She was so precious this Grandma of mine. So pre-occupied with the Tracy family, preserving it, nurturing it and now expanding it.
She frowned at me. "What's the smile for? I didn't say anything funny."
"Oh Grandma." I laughed. "Marriage and babies aren't on the horizon for me yet."
"But you do have the commitment of this little girl don't you?" she asked.
"I…I don't know." I stammered being taken completely off guard by her directness.
"Well without commitment young man there can never be real love." she sniffed. "It was like your Grandfather and I. I courted Grant for years and really never thought I loved him. I went everywhere with him and did everything with him but I never admitted I loved him. It was only when he proposed that I realised I did."
She knew I understood her meaning. She was giving me that knowing look of hers that said, "I know you are searching within yourself for an answer Scott."
She was telling me to propose to Addy.
No Grandma I couldn't. Not yet.
Then I got Dad's call
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
INTERNATIONAL RESCUE
The day Dad contacted me to discuss International Rescue was a day I'll never forget. My Father was asking me to resign from the Air Force and work for him.
He was asking for me to become his Chief Pilot, second in Command and lead my brothers in a top-secret, high level rescue organisation that worked for no Government in particular. A rescue organisation that had its headquarters at our Island home.
A rescue organisation funded purely by him and the profits of Tracy Industries. It was to be Jeff Tracy's way of saying thank-you to the world that had given him so much material gain. It was his dream. His vision.
My spare time was to be spent designing aircraft for the business. I was required to visit New York periodically to do the paperwork. I could have any luxury I wanted. There had to be catch and as always there was. Dad laid it down the line up front.
Catch Number 1 - I had to move home to Tracy Island.
Catch Number 2 - International Rescue was to be the Tracy family only plus the Kyrano family and his young Engineer Brains.
"But Dad." I breathed. "I'm seeing someone."
Dad re-iterated his previous statement. "It had to be to be the Tracy family only."
Dad became uncomfortable about my silence as I stood there stunned on the other end of the televid. He was asking me to give up Addy.
"Scott." he said. "I will of course give you the opportunity to pursue your relationship off base."
I didn't want that. How could he think that could be acceptable to me after sharing the same bed as Adelaide Reynolds for four years?
Naturally as the eldest I felt compelled to agree to his offer. I resigned from the Air Force as he had directed and prepared myself to deal with my situation with Adelaide.
Grandma's words rang true in my head.
"Without commitment young man there can never be real love."
With this in my heart I opened the special box my Father had given me seven years before. I looked at it and remembered her wearing it. I remembered Dad bringing it back from the hospital the night she died. Mom's engagement ring.
I was going to ask Addy to marry me and give her the token of love that was so revered by my Father.
Addy would be family then. She could come to Tracy Island as my wife.
If only it had been that simple.
I can't talk about this to anyone and I've only ever talked to Grandma about it once and that was after a few too many Scotches which made me feel sorry for myself. So I'll tell you this and make it short because it cuts me to the core to even think about it.
In summary Addy said no. I try not to think about the callous and uncaring way she said it but if I have to tell you the truth and I have been, that woman said no to me without taking an inward breath.
No to my proposal offered from the bottom of my heart.
No to being my lifelong companion as Dad had been to Mom.
No loving to my body as I had witnessed Dad with Mom.
No to bearing my children. My mom had died bearing Dad's last child.
What Mom and Dad had was love. What Addy and I had was only passion.
I knew that now.
I returned to Tracy Island alone. I am still alone but I am looking. One day I hope I can find the woman who will love me as my mother loved my father and I will experience the same joy as they did for that short time they were together.
Please… I can't talk about this any longer.
Today is supposed to be a happy one for Grandma and about her, not me. I'd best get back to the party and the dressing down I know I'm going to get.
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
FINAL THOUGHTS FROM THE APPRENTICE.
I've grabbed a drink and a handful of peanuts off the tray from Kyrano and feel much better after telling you my side of the story. The party's in full swing and it's great to have our whole family together to share such a happy and momentous milestone in Grandma's life.
I'm looking around the room. There's Virg sifting through music. John and Gordon are shooting some pool cracking jokes about their lack of talent . Kyrano is busy serving drinks. Naturally my youngest brother still isn't here but I've no doubt he and Tin-Tin will be finished doing whatever they're doing shortly and will soon join us. But look at Grandma.
Grandma is in her element at the moment tearing strips off my Father.
Boy is he ever copping it over there. Look at her go off. I swear she hasn't taken a breath for nearly ten minutes. Poor Dad; but then he wanted to give her the party. He said he was going to make a speech at the end of the night and give her something special he's wanted to give her for over twenty years. He hasn't said too much about what it is but if she doesn't let up soon I think it will be a sedative to keep her quiet.
You know if I had to sum my Grandma I would probably only need to say a few words.
Loving.
Spirited.
Determined.
Righteous
That just about sums her up I reckon.
Great. Looks like Virg is getting ready to play some of his famous rag-time on the piano. The party will really get going then. Grandma's had a few scotches so we'd better prepare ourselves for anything. Last time she was like this she did a mean Mexican hat dance, That sure was a night to remember. She couldn't walk for days.
Oh come on Grandma leave Dad alone. How much more can he take? It's starting to look like one of your reality checks!
Uh oh. She's spotted me and she's on her way over.
"So there you are!" she's exclaiming.
"Yes ma'am." I reply.
"Well?" she's asking.
"Well what?" I reply.
"Well what have you got to say for yourself?"
"What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean!"
"Ummm…Happy birthday?" I ask innocently.
"I'll give you happy birthday young man. Scott Tracy ! How dare you look me in the face all these weeks and lie to your Grandma! You're a disgrace to this family."
Her face gives her away. She's not really cross. She's delighted.
"I know I'm a disgrace Grandma." I smile and put down my glass. "You taught me everything I know."
She looks at me with those merry blue eyes. They're sparkling. I don't know whether it's the joy she feels or the Scotch. Most likely the scotch. Kyrano said she's had four already.
I'd love to say "Josie Tracy you're a disgrace to this family for setting such a bad example for your Grandsons." But I think I'll let her be. I've got something more important to say to this special old lady right now.
I wrap my arms around her and thank God for the gift of this wonderful woman.
Her arms wrap around me in return as I say from the bottom of my heart.
"I love you Grandma."
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Author's Note - I hope you have enjoyed this Chapter.I have.
NEXT CHAPTER - CHAPTER 7 - PART TWO - LUCY'S ARTIST SPEAKS
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
But now it's time the Tracy brothers and their Father got to defend themselves and say a little about Josie! mcj
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
CHAPTER 7 - FIVE GRANDSON'S IN DAMAGE CONTROL
PART 1 - THE FATHER'S APPRENTICE SPEAKS
I cannot believe that I am nearly thirty years old, and have been suffering this "party secret" thing for Dad's sake for nearly two months now. For two months I have pretended to know absolutely nothing about Dad's plans for Grandma tonight and all I can say is this;
"Dad who in the hell do you think you are kidding?"
Not Grandma that's for sure.
I've lied about this whole thing for ages and I've hated every minute of it even though it is for my Father and I always support Dad in everything. I'm the eldest and supporting my Father is my role around here. However I really hate lying to Grandma.
I lie badly too I might say. I sweat and shake and panic. Why? I'll tell you why! I just simply cannot do it and be convincing. Believe me I tried telling her many a good yarn over the years to try and keep myself out of trouble but I've failed each and every time with her. I know I've failed this time too.
I know she knows about this party and I'm also worried sick about how she's been settling the score behind my back for me "stretching the truth".
I know she's been telling you about my life and that worries me for a start because I know she knows too many things about me that I don't really want other people to know.
You never know what Grandma will do to you if she's discontent about something and now that I've lied to her; me, the Grandson who she trusts with her innermost secrets, you can bet she is going to be one disgruntled little old lady around me. That's when she's at her most dangerous. Can you imagine a Grandma ever being dangerous? Well if you can't you haven't met mine.
What makes it worse is that because I'm the eldest, I'm the one she's going to blame for it all and she's probably told more up front and personal things about me than everyone else. There's one really embarrassing thing I hope she didn't tell you and I'm cringing at the thought that she might have. No, not even Grandma would embarrass me like that. But then, maybe she would.
No matter what she won't say a thing to my four brothers. She won't thunder,
"Virgil Tracy ! How dare you look me in the face all these weeks and lie to your Grandma! You're a disgrace to this family!"
She won't say that any more than she'll tell you that he hides paintings of Mom in the attic.
No Sir, she won't say that to Johnny or to Gordon either. She also won't tell you that John got suspended from School for sowing his wild oats with Miranda Mason after smoking two joints in the gym or that Gordon made out with the top swimmer in the United States swimming squad when he was only sixteen and she was almost twenty-two.
She definitely won't say anything to her precious little Alan who's gotten away with murder with her for years and who thinks none of us know that he and Tin-Tin Kyrano have their own little make-out session going on right this minute in his room as I'm talking to you. You only had to see Grandma melt when he walked into the lounge just now swaggering around like he owns the place and arguing the point with my Father.
But she won't think twice saying anything to me though and why?
It always goes back to me being the eldest. I've been suffering that my whole life and not just with her.
My Dad expects more of me than my brothers and so does Grandma.
It's tough sometimes and I've been doing it tough ever since I was nine years old. Ever since my Mom died and Dad broke down three months after that.
Grandma's probably told you about my Mom. My brothers and I don't talk about her much with Dad; actually we don't talk about her at all. It hurts Dad too much and I don't like seeing my Father hurting. I'd rather hurt inside not talking about it than to see him hurt on the outside by having to.
Virgil and John don't agree though. They want Dad to talk about her and so does Grandma. She thinks he'll feel better about things if he does but I'm not so sure.
Dad changed when Mom died. I've never been able to put my finger on what it was that actually did change about him though. He was always the most wonderful Dad to me and he still is but back then he had something different and extra special about him. Something special that made him my "Daddy" not just my Father and I've often felt it was something Mom brought out in him. It had to be because whatever it was, it went into the casket with her and it never came back. Ever.
I've often asked Grandma what she thought that special something was. She says only Mom knew because only Mom could bring it out in him. Grandma told me Dad was never the same after meeting her and never the same after losing her either. He changed when he met her and when she died he changed right back again.
I've always felt sad for my little brothers, not so much Virgil who knew what it was like back then but for Johnny who only really remembers Dad the way he is now. Gordon and Alan never got to see what their real "Daddy" was like anymore than they got to know mom.
I guess being the eldest was good in that respect. At least I got to have a Mom longer than the other guys. Eight years and eleven months was better than four hours eleven minutes like Alan.
But enough about losing Mom. It hurt me back then and it hurts me even now. My Grandma has always made sure Mom is always uppermost in my heart and that I always remember how special she was and how much she loved me.
I am like my Dad . I think like him and I act like him. I look like him too but I guess you have to look like someone don't you?
But Grandma won't accept that. She knows Mom physically exists in all of us.
"He maybe like his Daddy but that curly hair of his was made in England." Grandma would say to anyone who said I looked nothing like Mom.
As for Grandma, I love her more than life itself and I am thrilled she has made it to her seventy-fifth birthday.
However, I want to say some things in my own defence if she has told you the things about me that I think she has.
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE APPLE OF MY PARENT'S EYES
Grandma says I always wanted to be an Astronaut. She will have told you that for sure. She's told everyone that over the years from the milkman in Boston right down to my Commander in the Air Force.
I don't remember ever saying that and neither do I believe it. I look at Johnny and Alan and then picture my life in the Air Force and my love of Thunderbird One. Astronaut? I doubt it. I suffer the occasional co-pilot in Thunderbird Three and that's only because that kid brother of mine is so reckless sometimes, but space has never done much for me not like it did for Dad.
But a love of flying…that's another story. That's something Dad and I do have very much in common. Dad taught me to fly when I was around fifteen. He was a great pilot and a good and patient Teacher. He always praised me and told me how good I was too. The only time I've ever doubted myself was when I ditched my Jet fighter at Langley trying to outdo everyone else in the squadron. Yeah that was the old blot on the military record for me and it made me realise I'm not infallible.
Grandma doesn't know about that much to my relief. I least I don't think she does. She hasn't said anything and with her you know she knows things by the look on her face. Her face hasn't given that one away yet so I think I'm safe. I hope so. The last thing I want is for Dad to find out about that. I was really relieved when the Air Force made no official statement about my little "accident".
She always tells a lame tale about me being jealous of Virgil when he was small. I don't remember ever looking on Virgil like that. He might have been Mom's favourite but I was Dad's so there wasn't a problem there. I think Grandma got it wrong.
Anyhow I'm supposed to have taken Virgil's diaper off and somehow made him "forget" himself and wet all over my parent's bed. If you want my opinion Grandma probably had one too many scotches that night and didn't do the darned thing up properly. She likes a scotch my Grandma and don't let her ever tell you otherwise.
Then there's the story about when Gordon was born. She thought I was a genius back then because I knew where I lived and Dad's telephone number. Heck I was seven years old and had two little brothers and another one about to be born. You had to have your wits about you then. Mom was always scared about losing one of us in the shopping centre and every single time we went to the shops she'd ask me the same questions in the car.
"What's your name?"
I'd say "Scott Jefferson Tracy."
"Where do you live?"
I'd say "550 Paramount Road."
"What's Daddy's mobile telephone number?"
I'd say "0414815237."
"Where's Daddy today?"
I'd look at her blankly for today's update. He was in a different place most days with his business and you never knew what the right answer was unless Mom told you.
"Daddy's in New York today" she'd say firmly. "So what do you do if something happens to Mommy or your little brothers?"
I'd say. "Stay calm and tell the policeman my name, where I live, tell him Daddy is in New York and give him Daddy's mobile telephone number."
"Good boy." she'd say and run her hand through my hair. So Grandma I wasn't actually a genius. Mom programmed it into me several days a week and luckily when Gordon was born it came in most useful.
It was nice to think Grandma thought I was genius anyway. She has always thought highly of me and that's reassuring but after the party secret comes out I might not quite be as popular in her eyes as I think. She won't forget about that and her memory is a long one.
I too have a good memory just like Grandma. I'll bet she thinks I can't remember a conversation we had one night when she took Virg, John and me out to a movie. Grandma had been sent to take us out so Mom and Dad could be alone.
I was eight then and after three brothers and the occasional glimpse of my parents naked together after we'd been sent to bed early by Dad for no good reason; I knew what it meant when Dad wanted to be alone with Mom. Alone with Mom meant Dad expected you to stay in your room. You never knew where they'd be if you ventured out... the lounge room when you forgot your security blanket, the kitchen if you needed a drink, or their bed with the door half-open if you needed to go past and use the bathroom.
I was going to tell Grandma not to go back when she said she forgot her purse because I knew Dad would more than likely go mad at her like he went mad at us if we interrupted things with him and Mom. But I guessed Grandma knew they did that sort of stuff and Dad would never go mad at Grandma.
But when she got back in the car looking miffed about what was going on in the house I knew it had to be Mom and Dad that had caused it. So I asked her was Dad kissing Mom without his clothes on again.
She lied and said no. I knew she lied because two months later Mom and Dad had a huge fight about another baby coming.
No-one ever had to tell me how you made babies Grandma so don't think I can't remember what Dad and Mom got up to back when I was young.
I most certainly can.
``````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
A LITTLE BOY LOST
I know I said I didn't want to talk about Mom anymore and I don't but no doubt Grandma told you about the things that happened to me when she died.
I asked Dad if I could stay at the hospital and help with Mom's arrangements but he said no and sent me home with Grandma. I was so scared I'd lose Dad too back then and I was still scared right up to when I joined the Air Force after College.
Dad let me read at Mom's funeral and I remember feeling like I did something really important for him that day even though no-one really listened to what I was reading. They were all crying too much to listen to me.
Dad was so cut up after Mom died and poor Grandma was trying to do everything she could to make him feel better.
I remember Dad struggling with money and his business and the babies and Grandma telling him he had to let her help. But Dad wouldn't let her.
And then Dad and Grandma forgot my birthday.
Next to Mom dying and losing Addy's love, that was the saddest day of my life.
I really don't think it actually hit me that Mom wasn't coming back anymore until that day.
Mom usually gave us a party on our birthday and we got to play some great games that she devised. We always had a cake and lots of presents even though they were only small and simple things. Mom was mindful of money since Dad's business had been in trouble but she always seemed to manage to find something special for a birthday no matter what. Dad always joined in the games and enjoyed the cake even if he was busy and we all knew he was. We knew how worried he was about the business but didn't understand why. Mom and Dad never told us anything about their money troubles but being the eldest I knew.
That dreadful day that I turned nine, there was nothing.
No party, no games, no cake, no presents.
It drove home the fact to me that my Mom was gone. Gone forever.
At least Virgil made me feel a little better. He played the piano for me even though Dad had forbidden him to do it. I still see him singing to me in the dark while all the while looking towards the door in fear that Dad would hear him and both of us would get a caning.
Even Grandma didn't remember my birthday. That was the only day she's ever let me down.
Dad said something to me when he remembered later. I don't know what jogged his memory in the middle of the night but I remember him coming downstairs in an old T-shirt and pyjama bottoms looking dreadful and sending Virgil up to bed. Luckily he'd finished playing the piano at that stage. All Dad did was cry that he had let me down.
I tried to make him feel better by saying it didn't matter when deep down in my heart it really did. Things like birthdays are important to you when you are a child and even though I was the eldest and I had to help with the others I was still a little boy back then.
Eventually I started crying too and it was more about Mom than the birthday. I asked my Dad why she had to die and he couldn't talk to me about it. Then both of us cried until Alan woke up and he had to tend to him. We still have never talked about it.
Grandma says I never cried about Mom enough and it wasn't healthy for a child.
She was always trying to drag my emotions out of me but like Dad I kept them inside unless I was by myself.
Well Grandma you would have been seen me crying on my birthday if you'd remembered it and rest assured I've shed many private tears in my room over the years because I didn't have a Mom when it counted.
Mother's days at school; when I graduated from High School; when I finished College; being decorated in the Air Force. She would have been so proud of me following in Dad's footsteps.
But as I said I don't want to talk about Mom anymore. Why do I keep thinking of her then when it's Grandma I'm telling you about?
It all goes back to Grandma never letting any of us forget her.
Even though Dad has tried to forget her for years, it's never really worked for any of us. Grandma says we must never forget. I wish Dad accepted that.
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE TEENAGE HEARTBREAKER
Grandma always referred to me as a teenage heartbreaker because of the number of different girls that I brought home from school when I was in High School.
She never let up at Dad about making sure he'd told me enough about women and life. I wanted to remind both of them that Dad had done that quite graphically already when I witnessed him with Mom.
If Grandma thought I didn't know what to do she was sadly mistaken and if she thought Dad hadn't told me himself she was wrong about that too. Dad had told me all right but I think I learned more watching him at seven than listening to him tell me at thirteen.
I must admit I enjoyed being popular in High school. I was tall and very like my father to look at and I suppose being the eldest son of a billionaire made the girls like me. Not that being wealthy made any difference in our home. Grandma wouldn't have it.
She expected that the five of us behaved like normal youngsters as she put it and that meant to her that we were polite and respectful and didn't think our place in life was above anyone else. So it always came as an embarrassment to me if someone mentioned with surprise that I was a nice young fellow given I was a "rich kid".
I loved confusing Grandma with the girls I brought home. Not that I had to try hard to confuse her. She had a terrible head for names and faces unless that particular name or face did something to make themselves memorable in her eyes. I was constantly in damage control when she called my latest flame "Candy" when her name was really "Ellie" especially when Candy was Ellie's best friend. Grandma has a lot a talent in fact finding and interfering but she should have learned to keep quiet when it came to my girl-friends.
When I started bringing girls home to meet Grandma I was fourteen. I knew the fact that I was only fourteen ruffled her feathers enough let alone the fact that some of them were quite "well developed" for their age.
"You mind yourself Scott Tracy." she'd say pointing her wooden spoon in my direction. "With those looks of yours those girls are like metal to a magnet. Don't you go thinking of trying anything I'll not be pleased about."
Well I'd been thinking about trying it I had to admit. The things Dad told me were physically going to happen to me had happened and I felt up to the task but the fact that Grandma might find out held me in check for nearly two years.
Then I met Adelaide Reynolds. Addy; the girl who turned me into a man.
She came to our school as a transfer from Ohio. She was gorgeous. I remember staring at her blonde hair and blue eyes in history and dreaming about a first time with someone who looked like her so much so that I wasn't going to be able to get up at the end of the history class without disgracing myself. I ended up getting into big trouble with my Teacher for not paying attention in class.
I felt like saying "Miss Hind. I'm thinking about making my own American history. Don't expect me to care about the Boston Tea Party when I'm planning my own."
Well Addy was the one I chose and I set about making sure that she didn't want to say no when the time eventually came. I was fortunate that she seemed to like me without too much effort on my part so I was part of the way there. After all I was Scott Tracy, tall, blue-eyed, dark-haired, High School football quarterback, a man of the world. That's how I portrayed myself back then. Most of it was true. I just wasn't a man of the world yet, but I was working on it. Boy was I working on it.
Over the next few weeks we spent a lot of free time together mainly in recesses. It grew to the point that she would be waiting for me at the cafeteria each lunch hour and we would share lunch together. One day I even grew bold enough to take her hand across the table. I imagined this was what you needed to do if you wanted a woman the way I wanted Addy. You could see her eyes shine and her whole face light up after I did that. I was relieved. I hadn't been sure if it was the right thing to do.
You see whilst I witnessed the act between my parents when I was younger, I'd never witnessed what had essentially led up to it. How did you in reality persuade someone to do that with you of their own free will? Now it's pretty darned obvious I couldn't ask my Grandma that question and imagine what would have happened to me if I'd have asked Dad's advice!
Well the next step was asking her if she'd like to catch the bus home with me to do some homework. That would get her into my room at least. I offered for Grandma to drive her home after we had finished studying. She didn't look too keen about coming over to our house.
"Why can't we go to where the other kids hang out?" she asked. "They all do their homework there."
I had to lower my head and admit to her that Dad expected me to come straight home from school when I didn't have football practice because I had to help my little brothers with their homework. She didn't look like she believed me so I then had to go through the pain of explaining to her that we didn't have a mother and all the responsibility associated with being the eldest son and being totally answerable for my brothers until Dad got home.
"OK then I'll come." she said and smiled at me. I smiled back; totally smitten. All I saw was that face, those eyes, that body.
I took her hand that day and felt a familiar tingling I'd rather not talk about. Yes Sir, I decided there and then. She was going to be the one. I make a lot of on-the-spot decisions these days in International Rescue but the decision about Addy...it was the easiest and most spontaneous decision of my life.
I swear from the very first day Addy walked through the front door of our house Grandma knew I'd picked her out for that purpose.
Grandma didn't approve of Addy at all even though she never let her see it. The look she gave me though said it all. So it took me quite a while and a heck of a lot of planning to get myself into the position of safety I needed to experience "life" as my father had demonstrated to me as a child.
I had it all planned. It was a Wednesday in the middle of May. Everyone had discussed their afternoon plans with Dad at the breakfast table. Dad always insisted on that so he knew where we were all supposed to be after school.
Virgil had football practice. John was going to be at the library doing astronomy research. Alan and Gordon had plans to make a new model plane. I knew they always did that under the big tree outside. It was all falling into place. The only person I needed to get out of the way now was Grandma. You may as well ask for the whole of the US army to be stood down as to try to get rid of Grandma of course. The only way was to target one of her few weaknesses. I knew she hated climbing stairs and when she asked me to take the laundry upstairs that morning complaining that her knee was playing up I was extremely sympathetic.
"You need to rest up Grandma." I said but my tone must have had a little too much concern to it as I saw her frown suspiciously. Luckily for me Dad suggested that she would be better off staying downstairs most of the day and when she agreed it was a good idea that was it for me.
I had a clear shot at losing my virginity without being interrupted. Of course it would all hinge on whether Addy agreed. I was pretty sure she would. Things had been starting to hot up a bit between us during our "study sessions".
When you are young, occasions such as this are rather momentous and I could hardly concentrate during my classes at the reality that it might actually happen. Today would give me one up on my brothers. I'd be able to say the old line "Been there, done that" as I did with so many other things. But this … this was the ultimate. I would be like my Father, no longer a little boy in the eyes of the world.
I asked Addy if she was planning to come over that afternoon. Neither of us had any homework but our "study" sessions had become very non-academic the last few times anyhow.
"What are we studying?" she asked mischievously.
"Biology." I winked.
"I don't even take Biology." she laughed, clearly understanding my meaning.
"Neither do I." I replied. "But studying it would be another step in our education Addy."
She looked about her and then said quietly.
"Do you have any protection?"
It was like she had blown me out of the water. She was rather willing it seemed.
"Have you done this before?" I asked.
"Yeah, haven't you?" she asked in return.
Well what could I say? I had to keep my reputation intact.
"Of course I have." I lied.
"So do you have any?" she continued.
"Any what?"
"Any protection?"
"Of course I do." I said.
I'd forgotten all about the protection side of things. Damn it! I knew I had to use it. Dad had made that point to me over and over.
"Protect yourself. Protect the girl." ever since I had been thirteen. I hadn't had the need for it until now and now that I did, I didn't have any. I knew Dad wouldn't have any so I couldn't search his room when I got home. There was no way I was going even going to ask Virgil. He was only fourteen. Oh well. I'd just have to go to the drug store myself in free class and buy some.
Well going to that drug store that day was more stressful than any rescue I've ever been involved in. I didn't go to drugstores and didn't even know where to look for what I needed. Worse still was the fact that the drug store was owned by Candice Paterson's father and he was the one serving at the counter. Remember Candice ? She was one of my ex-girlfriends; the one Grandma mistook for Ellie all the time.
"How are you Scott?" he said frowning disapprovingly at what lay before him on the counter as I searched my pocket for money.
"I'm fine thank you Sir." I replied trying not to look embarrassed.
"You don't see Candice these days do you?" he enquired as he rang the sale though. I knew what he was getting at when he asked that question.
"No Sir." I replied. "Candy is seeing my friend Rob now."
"Can't say as I know him." he mused. He held out the package. "Well then, there you are. Tell your Grandmother I'll see her next week. That new drug I ordered for her should be in for her to collect by then."
My Grandmother? Oh no. I hope he didn't intend to discuss what I'd purchased with her. My life wouldn't be worth living if he did.
Anyway the big moment came when we arrived home from school and there was Grandma sitting in front of the television peeling vegetables.
"Hello darling." she said to me as I kissed her cheek. Her voice dropped a little when she saw Addy.
"Hello Adelaide dear." she said. Her voice wasn't disapproving. It was …oh hell what's the point in pretending here. Grandma's tone was down right disapproving. Grandma knew my plans for that afternoon I swear.
"Hello Mrs. Tracy." she replied.
"How's your knee Grandma?" I asked. "I'm pleased to see you're resting it like Dad suggested."
"My knee is fine thank-you." she nodded. "Do either of you want anything to eat?"
"No ma'am we'll be studying upstairs." I said. "I'll come down and get something if we need it. Err…is anyone home?" I asked trying to sound as innocent as possible.
Unfortunately I didn't see her eyes narrow suspiciously but she came out with it anyway as directly as you please.
"What do you need to know that for?"
Boy life was tough sometimes with Grandma needing to know everything.
I shrugged. "No reason Grandma. I'm just supposed to know where everyone is in case Dad calls."
And with that I took my intended to my room.
Now I'd rather leave the story there and tell you that my first time was a powerful, wonderful and earth-shattering experience and normally I would. I can probably lie to you and get away with it but the longer I've gone on talking about Grandma, the more I know she would have taken great delight in telling you the truth about that afternoon.
I know she knows and I bet she's told you.
I've died inside about this for years because I know she knows.
How did she know? Two pieces of chocolate cake and orange juice near the scene of the crime that's how. Those sorts of things don't miraculously appear in your bedroom do they? Someone had to put them there and I knew that someone had to be Grandma. I definitely knew by the way she looked at me for nearly six months afterwards.
She has this amused smile which tells you in no uncertain way that she has a secret that will humiliate you for the rest of your life if you're not careful. She particularly gives her smile to Dad and to Virgil, goodness knows what they've done to have the honour, and also to me.
I guess I'd better give you my side of the story. It might save me a bit of face I guess.
In our home Dad had an open door policy. You could close your door for privacy all right but you weren't allowed to lock it. The only door you were allowed to lock was the bathroom for obvious reasons.
Naturally the type of thing I had planned for that afternoon could only be attempted in a room where there was a lock. This meant tying up the bathroom and with two little brothers who drank orange juice like there was going to be a shortage any minute, this ended up presenting a big problem.
I'd finally ended up with Addy in the bathroom and we were getting to the business end of things when Gordon pounded on the door.
"I'm in here." I replied placing a warning finger against Addy's lips. "I'll be a while."
"But Scott. I have to go." he complained.
"Use Dad's bathroom then." I called back.
"You know I'm not allowed."
"Dad's not gonna find out." I said becoming more annoyed by the minute.
"He did last time." came the annoying little voice.
"Well come back in ten minutes." I snapped.
"Scott! I'll explode before then."
"You'll have to wait your turn Gordon." I said.
He went away after that and I thought he'd gone to use Dad's bathroom. Unfortunately for me he'd gone to complain to Grandma but at that point in time with Addy in that particular state of undress, I really didn't give a damn what he was doing.
With the interruption, things went back to square one again with me but one look at Addy like that, well it didn't take me long to find the fortitude to continue.
The pivotal moment came and I needed to organise the protection…quickly.
Now I knew I had paid attention when Dad explained it to me and it all looked rather simple to use particularly to someone who was a whiz at physics and mathematics as I was. The truth of the matter was that this was a damn big event in my life and I hadn't done any "homework" on how to use it. Let's leave it by saying that by the time I'd worked out how to get it on, the reason I needed to put it on had well and truly "escaped me". I have never experienced such embarrassment in my life and at the end of it all I walked out of the bathroom to find the cake and the juice in my room near the door to the bathroom. Grandma!
Oh God. I pride myself on being quite a reasonable partner these days but while Grandma lives and breathes I'll always be reminded of that day with Addy and the fact that Grandma must have heard the whole damned embarrassing thing and has never said a word about it to me.
I tell you her silence can be more damaging sometimes than her tongue and this was definitely one of those times.
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
THE AIR FORCE
Once I finished College I decided to join the Air Force, a decision I made in my own right after a lot of thinking and consideration. Contrary to what people said in the academy, Dad didn't push me into the Forces. Naturally he was proud and happy that I had selected the Air Force as a career and offered to put in a good word for me when required. I nearly exploded when he said that. I was twenty-one with College behind me. I didn't need Dad's "good word" to make it anywhere. I went to say something but held my tongue at Grandma's warning look.
Nevertheless I was emphatic that I would make it on my own and I told Grandma in no uncertain terms that when I did make it I was going to make it bigger and better than Dad ever did. She had smiled and said.
"Of course you will sweetie."
Somehow I felt she wasn't taking me seriously. But I was serious. I could pilot before I'd even joined up so I was already a mile in front of most of the recruits who started basic training with me and I knew it. I had a bit of an attitude about me back then, courtesy of my Father. I knew I was good because he'd told me so and Dad didn't say you were good at anything unless it was absolutely true. So I knew and therefore expected to be a force to be reckoned with in the Air Force. What an eye-opener I got in my first year in the Academy. It was worse than one of Grandma's "reality checks".
I haven't mentioned these yet have I? Well you can guarantee every one of my brothers has had been on the receiving end of one of those from Grandma in their time. Grandma loved us dearly and left the disciplining to Dad but every now and then it all got too much for her. It was then she would storm in to the room like a tribe of wild Indians and say "young man you need a reality check and I'm about to give it to you."
These were words we all grew to dread.
It didn't matter what the situation was; if you had gotten yourself into trouble over something major, she literally held you by the scruff of the neck and lectured you over and over again until you'd rather die than listen to her any more. It was worse than any Chinese water torture could ever be and definitely worse than any pain Dad's canings could inflict. So keep that thought in your mind and think about how bad it was for me in the Forces that first year.
My attitude was taken by the scruff of the neck by my Commander and I was lectured over and over that I wasn't as good as I thought I was. Sure I was the son of Jeff Tracy and I knew how to fly but I still had the hardest part to come.
Living up to the high expectation that went with the Tracy surname. That was hard all right. Most of the Commanders I served under remembered and respected my Father but it didn't stop them continually trying to find fault with me. They viewed me as the cocky eldest son. One mistake and they were on to me. My first year was nothing but totally miserable.
I settled down after the reality check and began to show the same skills, abilities and leadership qualities as my Father. Once I had a bit of experience they could not and did not find the faults in me that they sought. It was then I began to excel. My attitude was gone and my mind was on the job. I quickly began to go through the ranks as Dad had done.
Many of the other guys in my squadron hated me because I was Jeff Tracy's son particularly when I was decorated for valour in the field.
However, while they were seething with discontent I was viewing it all with suspicion Every decoration I received in the service seemed to occur after my Father's name was mentioned somewhere or after he had attended the base for an official function or simply to come to watch me fly. I started to wonder if Dad was interfering at a high level.
I came close to accusing him of it but as usual Grandma has a knack of keeping you out of trouble by being in the wrong place at the right time. That day I was sure she must have been telepathic. I had been chewing myself up inside about a recent decoration I'd received for valour. My Commander who served under Dad said he had discussed that mission with my Father and Dad had said I fully deserved the honour for an exceptional effort in the field.
I was furious and in the end it all became too much for me. I contacted Dad at home. I was ready to have it out with him.But I didn't get Dad.
Grandma took the call.
"Where's Dad?" I'd snapped none too politely forgetting who I was talking to over the televid.
She rolled her eyes at me.
"Your Father isn't here. Scott Tracy look at your face. Frowning like the world's going to end. What's the problem to make you look at me like that then?"
"Dad's my problem." I began angrily.
"I knew you were going to say that" she mused and then continued.
"I guess then that what happened at the base last month has affected you sweetie?"
I looked confused. What had happened? I tried not to let on I didn't have a clue what she was talking about. She shook her head and continued.
"Why your Father refuses to interfere with matters concerning you boys is beyond me sometimes. I don't know why he wouldn't give you a helping hand towards a promotion when he could. I can't believe that when that Commander of yours asked his opinion of your flying abilities he told him to decide for himself. I'm sorry sweetie if that's cost you anything."
"No Grandma. It's OK" I replied. "Dad's never been anything but straight down the line with me."
"Yes he has." she replied looking at me knowingly. "Anything else now?"
"No ma'am." I replied and ended the call. As I returned to the base I shook my head at how that call had exonerated Dad. She knew I was going to say something. I swear she knew.
But that's my Grandma. One step in front of everyone all of the time.
My time in the forces was also a time when I found personal and physical fulfilment.
Adelaide and I met up again in Nevada. It was a case of we must have been meant for each other I think. Fate had destined us to meet that day in High School. Fate had brought her to my home for the biggest and most embarrassing moment of my life, and now fate brought her back to me in the form of a legal secretary working for her Father's huge engineering firm in Nevada.
We re-kindled our relationship one cold Friday evening when I'd gone into town to have a few beers with a couple of my buddies. When she walked in with her friends I had to pinch myself a few times to believe that it was really her. I couldn't believe my luck. Adelaide Reynolds; still blonde, still beautiful, still captivating, and after a few hours of Tracy charm…still willing to be mine.
She told me she wanted to resume the relationship as I lay with her that night after making long and passionate love. That night had been a bit more successful for me than the first attempt thank goodness although she didn't let me live that down for a long time.
I knew she was impressed that I was now in the Air Force and flying through the ranks and it reminded me of what Dad had told me about his chance meeting with Mom in London.
Dad had said he met my mother when he was on the verge of leaving the Air Force to join NASA. He said that he always felt my mother had been impressed with him being in the Forces and that had been the catalyst which resulted in her coming to the States to be with him.
Grandma gave us a totally different viewpoint of course. She said Dad's description of things sounded like an advertisement to get young men to join the Air Force. Grandma then cleared things up by saying Dad had been smitten with Mom from the moment he saw her and Mom had been pretty much the same. From what Grandma said Dad could have been penniless and Mom wouldn't have cared and she could have come over from England armed with a machine gun and he wouldn't have noticed. All they had ever seen was each other.
"Scott your Father is living proof of where there's love in a man's heart nothing stands in the way." she said with wisdom. "And as for a woman loving a man...well your Mother leaving her family and country is evidence enough of that."
I wondered for a while whether or not history looked like repeating itself. Fate had destined Mom and Dad to meet. Surely only fate could bring Addy back to me in Nevada.
After a few months, I asked Addy to move in with me. I didn't feel the love Grandma said Dad had felt for Mom but we still had a good relationship all the same.
I kept my relationship with Addy and the fact that we were living together very close to my chest. I didn't tell Dad or any of my brothers. I didn't even tell Grandma at least not for a while. I had only ever had one close relationship with a woman in my life and that had been with my Mother. I had loved her unconditionally. I kept telling myself that I would grow to love Addy unconditionally too and the fact that I hadn't yet had to be my fault. I guessed I needed time.
Addy didn't seem to mind the way things were. We had a physical chemistry between us that was dynamite and the loving was satisfying and good. She was materialistic and I could afford to give her the things she wanted to be happy. We laughed often and went everywhere together. But I knew something was missing from the home we had made together.
Love.
I loved her in the physical way. I couldn't live without her emotionally either. I just didn't love her. What I felt for Addy was not the love I knew my Father had felt for my mother. The love I witnessed being expressed in one way or another every day of their married lives. Little things Dad used to do like steal a kiss from Mom when she was trying to cook dinner or tuck a stray curl behind her ear as he spoke to her. I had the best possible role-model on how to love a woman properly yet I did none of that,
It was then a chance telephone call from Grandma made me realise what stopped me from loving Adelaide Reynolds.
Grandma telephoned me often and our discussions went backwards and forwards from how my youngest brothers were coping with High School, to Dad's business, to Kyrano's new experiments in the kitchen, to me.
Grandma was now on a mission of procreation. She wanted a great grandchild and it was me she was after to do the honours.
"You should be finding yourself a pretty little girl and raising your own sons." she told me. I knew I was nearly twenty-eight, two years older than Dad had been when I was born.
"Grandma the last thing I need in my life is changing diapers and feeding bottles to babies again." I told her. Despite how the years had passed it only seemed like yesterday that I was feeding Alan his bottle the night my Dad broke down from the stress of Mom dying and his failing business.
Grandma didn't look convinced. I decided to come clean.
"I'll only tell you because I know I can trust you. I'm taking things slowly and don't want Dad or the guys to know yet. Grandma I am seeing someone. I've been seeing her for a while. It's pretty serious."
Well if Grandma was able to knit I was sure she would have started on the baby booties while we were still talking on the televid.
"That's wonderful news!" she beamed. "Before long you'll be talking marriage and babies young man."
I smiled at her. She was so precious this Grandma of mine. So pre-occupied with the Tracy family, preserving it, nurturing it and now expanding it.
She frowned at me. "What's the smile for? I didn't say anything funny."
"Oh Grandma." I laughed. "Marriage and babies aren't on the horizon for me yet."
"But you do have the commitment of this little girl don't you?" she asked.
"I…I don't know." I stammered being taken completely off guard by her directness.
"Well without commitment young man there can never be real love." she sniffed. "It was like your Grandfather and I. I courted Grant for years and really never thought I loved him. I went everywhere with him and did everything with him but I never admitted I loved him. It was only when he proposed that I realised I did."
She knew I understood her meaning. She was giving me that knowing look of hers that said, "I know you are searching within yourself for an answer Scott."
She was telling me to propose to Addy.
No Grandma I couldn't. Not yet.
Then I got Dad's call
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
INTERNATIONAL RESCUE
The day Dad contacted me to discuss International Rescue was a day I'll never forget. My Father was asking me to resign from the Air Force and work for him.
He was asking for me to become his Chief Pilot, second in Command and lead my brothers in a top-secret, high level rescue organisation that worked for no Government in particular. A rescue organisation that had its headquarters at our Island home.
A rescue organisation funded purely by him and the profits of Tracy Industries. It was to be Jeff Tracy's way of saying thank-you to the world that had given him so much material gain. It was his dream. His vision.
My spare time was to be spent designing aircraft for the business. I was required to visit New York periodically to do the paperwork. I could have any luxury I wanted. There had to be catch and as always there was. Dad laid it down the line up front.
Catch Number 1 - I had to move home to Tracy Island.
Catch Number 2 - International Rescue was to be the Tracy family only plus the Kyrano family and his young Engineer Brains.
"But Dad." I breathed. "I'm seeing someone."
Dad re-iterated his previous statement. "It had to be to be the Tracy family only."
Dad became uncomfortable about my silence as I stood there stunned on the other end of the televid. He was asking me to give up Addy.
"Scott." he said. "I will of course give you the opportunity to pursue your relationship off base."
I didn't want that. How could he think that could be acceptable to me after sharing the same bed as Adelaide Reynolds for four years?
Naturally as the eldest I felt compelled to agree to his offer. I resigned from the Air Force as he had directed and prepared myself to deal with my situation with Adelaide.
Grandma's words rang true in my head.
"Without commitment young man there can never be real love."
With this in my heart I opened the special box my Father had given me seven years before. I looked at it and remembered her wearing it. I remembered Dad bringing it back from the hospital the night she died. Mom's engagement ring.
I was going to ask Addy to marry me and give her the token of love that was so revered by my Father.
Addy would be family then. She could come to Tracy Island as my wife.
If only it had been that simple.
I can't talk about this to anyone and I've only ever talked to Grandma about it once and that was after a few too many Scotches which made me feel sorry for myself. So I'll tell you this and make it short because it cuts me to the core to even think about it.
In summary Addy said no. I try not to think about the callous and uncaring way she said it but if I have to tell you the truth and I have been, that woman said no to me without taking an inward breath.
No to my proposal offered from the bottom of my heart.
No to being my lifelong companion as Dad had been to Mom.
No loving to my body as I had witnessed Dad with Mom.
No to bearing my children. My mom had died bearing Dad's last child.
What Mom and Dad had was love. What Addy and I had was only passion.
I knew that now.
I returned to Tracy Island alone. I am still alone but I am looking. One day I hope I can find the woman who will love me as my mother loved my father and I will experience the same joy as they did for that short time they were together.
Please… I can't talk about this any longer.
Today is supposed to be a happy one for Grandma and about her, not me. I'd best get back to the party and the dressing down I know I'm going to get.
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
FINAL THOUGHTS FROM THE APPRENTICE.
I've grabbed a drink and a handful of peanuts off the tray from Kyrano and feel much better after telling you my side of the story. The party's in full swing and it's great to have our whole family together to share such a happy and momentous milestone in Grandma's life.
I'm looking around the room. There's Virg sifting through music. John and Gordon are shooting some pool cracking jokes about their lack of talent . Kyrano is busy serving drinks. Naturally my youngest brother still isn't here but I've no doubt he and Tin-Tin will be finished doing whatever they're doing shortly and will soon join us. But look at Grandma.
Grandma is in her element at the moment tearing strips off my Father.
Boy is he ever copping it over there. Look at her go off. I swear she hasn't taken a breath for nearly ten minutes. Poor Dad; but then he wanted to give her the party. He said he was going to make a speech at the end of the night and give her something special he's wanted to give her for over twenty years. He hasn't said too much about what it is but if she doesn't let up soon I think it will be a sedative to keep her quiet.
You know if I had to sum my Grandma I would probably only need to say a few words.
Loving.
Spirited.
Determined.
Righteous
That just about sums her up I reckon.
Great. Looks like Virg is getting ready to play some of his famous rag-time on the piano. The party will really get going then. Grandma's had a few scotches so we'd better prepare ourselves for anything. Last time she was like this she did a mean Mexican hat dance, That sure was a night to remember. She couldn't walk for days.
Oh come on Grandma leave Dad alone. How much more can he take? It's starting to look like one of your reality checks!
Uh oh. She's spotted me and she's on her way over.
"So there you are!" she's exclaiming.
"Yes ma'am." I reply.
"Well?" she's asking.
"Well what?" I reply.
"Well what have you got to say for yourself?"
"What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean!"
"Ummm…Happy birthday?" I ask innocently.
"I'll give you happy birthday young man. Scott Tracy ! How dare you look me in the face all these weeks and lie to your Grandma! You're a disgrace to this family."
Her face gives her away. She's not really cross. She's delighted.
"I know I'm a disgrace Grandma." I smile and put down my glass. "You taught me everything I know."
She looks at me with those merry blue eyes. They're sparkling. I don't know whether it's the joy she feels or the Scotch. Most likely the scotch. Kyrano said she's had four already.
I'd love to say "Josie Tracy you're a disgrace to this family for setting such a bad example for your Grandsons." But I think I'll let her be. I've got something more important to say to this special old lady right now.
I wrap my arms around her and thank God for the gift of this wonderful woman.
Her arms wrap around me in return as I say from the bottom of my heart.
"I love you Grandma."
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Author's Note - I hope you have enjoyed this Chapter.I have.
NEXT CHAPTER - CHAPTER 7 - PART TWO - LUCY'S ARTIST SPEAKS
````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````