I own neither Zim nor Johnny. They belong to Jhonen Vasquez, whom is the greatest of humans. First fiction on this site. Enjoy.

A night club. 2:00 am. Wait, no. A dark alley. Yes, that's it. A thin man is seen walking towards the alley, wearing a trenchcoat which contained numerous knives. His hair is gone, save two spikes of hair on either side. He steps into the palpable darkness, seeing a short figure in the corner of the alley. He wore a red, pinstriped shirt, black shorts and boots, and his hair was slicked back. His most notable feature was his skin, which was a pale green. He stepped forward, a snack stick in his mouth, which he was sucking noisily. Nny cleared his throat loudly. The green one turned at him, dropping the stick.

"Are you the one who called me?" Nny said in an ominous tone.

"Yes, Earth-monkey. It is I, ZIM! who has contacted you. I require your assistance in a certain...extermination problem.", Zim replied, picking up the stick and swallowing it.

"Earth-monkey?! What kind of name is that?!", Nny shrieked, brandishing a knife threateningly. "What's stopping me from gutting you like a trout!?"

"Because, chub-monster, I have your Devi-mate."

This stopped Nny cold. He twisted his face in violent fury. "IF YOU TOUCH ONE HAIR ON HER HEAD, I'LL-"

"You will do nothing. I have this remote and I merely need to say a voice activation code, and your love-beast becomes something very squishy and flat.", Zim warned, holding a remote. "Even if you were to attack, I would be able to say it before I perished."

Nny scowled at him, putting the knife back into the folds of his coat. "So...What do you want, fucker?"

"I know not of this Fookor you speak of, but I need you to DESTROY this Fool-boy!"

He tossed a photo at Nny, the maniac cathcing it in the air. He looked at it and saw a boy with black hair, which was styled up in a scythe-like manner. He had glasses and wore a black jacket. He looked up at Zim. "You want me to kill a kid?" he asked incredulity, tossing the picture back.

"Yes, I know, but he has been harder to manage than you think. Because of HIM I HAVE YET TO DESTROY THIS FILTHY DIRT BALL!"

Nny blinked. "Um...what?"

Zim reached up and took out his contacts, also removing his wig. Nny gasped, amazed at this predicament. Zim smiled. "I know you hate this planet as much as I do, so I have a new proposition. I don't really have your mate-

"SHE'S NOT MY MATE!"

"-I just said that to get your attention.", he continued, ignoring his interjection. "If you kill the Dib-human, I will take you to a new planet if you wish. Think of it; you would no longer have to deal with the DISGUSTING...IDIOTIC...HUUUUUMAAAANNNNNSSSSS!!!" Zim said, adding much body language.

Nny thought for a moment, pondering over his options. Hmm...If I kill him, things stay the same, but if I kill this kid for him, maybe I can actualy find someplace where the people aren't as smart as the filth around them...

"You got a deal."

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