This is going to be very short. heh
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Chapter Six = The Ten Commandments, the revised version
And Moses met with the pharaoh and he said, "Leteth my peoples go!"
And the Pharaoh said, "What? What do you mean?"
And Moses paused. "Well… uh, leteth themeth goeth? You know… away?"
And the Pharaoh frowned. "You mean into the desert…? But, why…?"
Moses thought a moment, then looked up. "Yeah, why God?"
And God said, "Shuteth up! Just tell him again."
And so Moses tooketh up his stick and said. "'Cause we, uh… wanteth to!"
And the Pharaoh, putting down his tea cup, said. "Oh, well in that case… you're free to go."
Moses lowered the staff. "Oh… really?"
And the Pharaoh replied, "Yes, go ahead."
But God thought this was a rather boring ending to the story and in a thundering cloud came upon the Earth and said, "There will be plagues of frogs and locusts and darkness uponeth your people pharaoh! Lots ofeth 'em!"
And Moses whined in a shrill voice from below, "But Lord… he already let us go!"
But God ignored Moses, for Moses was whiney. And eventually Moses did finally get out of Egypt, although the Pharaoh no longer liked him very much. And because of this, Moses did not get the map of the desert.
And for forty years Moses and the former "slaves" wandered in the desert.
And for forty years they whined until God could no longer taketh it. And God created an oasis in the desert. Remembering his earlier mistake, God created a list of commandments.
The first draft went like this:
1. Thou shalt not whine.
2. Thou shalt not killeth thy brother with a chicken leg.
3. Thou shalt not eat cabbages.
4. Thou shall remember I am the Lord and keep it that way.
5. Thou shall createth hats with feathers each Sabbath and they shall be holy.
6. Thou shalt not steal from thy neighbour, but family members are okay.
7. Thou shall name thy children after Gerry.
8. Thou shalt not play loud Ricky Martin music, for he is whiney.
9. Thou shalt not enter Eden. (Adam's faulteth)
10. Thou shalt actually listen to my commandments and not whine about them.
The second version was a little more general, and God decided to use that one instead.
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Okay, I realise that was short, but next I'll have the new testament. That'll be fun. And that's an understatement.
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Chapter Six = The Ten Commandments, the revised version
And Moses met with the pharaoh and he said, "Leteth my peoples go!"
And the Pharaoh said, "What? What do you mean?"
And Moses paused. "Well… uh, leteth themeth goeth? You know… away?"
And the Pharaoh frowned. "You mean into the desert…? But, why…?"
Moses thought a moment, then looked up. "Yeah, why God?"
And God said, "Shuteth up! Just tell him again."
And so Moses tooketh up his stick and said. "'Cause we, uh… wanteth to!"
And the Pharaoh, putting down his tea cup, said. "Oh, well in that case… you're free to go."
Moses lowered the staff. "Oh… really?"
And the Pharaoh replied, "Yes, go ahead."
But God thought this was a rather boring ending to the story and in a thundering cloud came upon the Earth and said, "There will be plagues of frogs and locusts and darkness uponeth your people pharaoh! Lots ofeth 'em!"
And Moses whined in a shrill voice from below, "But Lord… he already let us go!"
But God ignored Moses, for Moses was whiney. And eventually Moses did finally get out of Egypt, although the Pharaoh no longer liked him very much. And because of this, Moses did not get the map of the desert.
And for forty years Moses and the former "slaves" wandered in the desert.
And for forty years they whined until God could no longer taketh it. And God created an oasis in the desert. Remembering his earlier mistake, God created a list of commandments.
The first draft went like this:
1. Thou shalt not whine.
2. Thou shalt not killeth thy brother with a chicken leg.
3. Thou shalt not eat cabbages.
4. Thou shall remember I am the Lord and keep it that way.
5. Thou shall createth hats with feathers each Sabbath and they shall be holy.
6. Thou shalt not steal from thy neighbour, but family members are okay.
7. Thou shall name thy children after Gerry.
8. Thou shalt not play loud Ricky Martin music, for he is whiney.
9. Thou shalt not enter Eden. (Adam's faulteth)
10. Thou shalt actually listen to my commandments and not whine about them.
The second version was a little more general, and God decided to use that one instead.
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Okay, I realise that was short, but next I'll have the new testament. That'll be fun. And that's an understatement.