Disclaimer: I own nothing. Boo yah.

Before people start accusing me of plagiarism, I swear that I had this written before LadyAkki45 wrote her author help fic. I just didn't have it in story form.

The Creed

By: Janus Kamaren

Link ducked below the swinging blade of the Lizalfo. Taking advantage of his foe's momentum, he quickly stabbed it in the stomach. The beast squealed and slumped to the ground. Link sheathed his sword, brushing his blonde bangs out of his eyes. He entered the last room in the dungeon. Candles were the only lights in the dark room, along with a gray stone alter with a mystic blue shaft of light. It couldn't be said whether the shaft descended upon the alter or ascended from it. Link opened a pouch on his belt and removed rolled up pieces of parchment. On it were things that Zelda had written, things that the Triforce of Wisdom had taught her. She dubbed it "The Creed." Link began looking over it. It seemed to be a list of literary tips that had to do with his world. He began to read it.

Under no circumstance will I write the phrase "What was this feeling inside of him/her?"

Link agreed with this. He had seen things of an alternate dimension. More specifically, he had read its stories based on Hyrule, and he knew that this was a very cliché line, not to mention that it was normally used for someone old enough to know what love was.

I will resist the temptation to put author's notes in the middle of the story. I will instead put them in the beginning and/or ending of the chapter.

A wise sage known as LadyAkki45 had brought this up. Many didn't realize that it detracts from the story. And sadly, almost everyone was guilty of it.

I will never make the 3rd-person narrator swear.

Link didn't see why one would do so in the first place.

I will accept the fact that all Zelda characters (except for Tingle, arguably) are straight and write accordingly.

The Hero of Time shuddered at the thought of Tingle. He also remembered seeing several people writing stories portraying the hero as homosexual, despite the fact there was plenty of evidence that he wasn't. Besides, he had always considered Zelda as a perfect reason to stay straight.

If I break the above rule, I will realize that Link and Ganondorf are enemies and therefore couldn't possibly be lovers. The same applies to Link and Dark Link.

Again, Link could not see why people would do otherwise.

If I am writing a story with a couple other than Link/Zelda, I will realize that the games point to said couple as being at least friends, and write accordingly. Otherwise, I will add "OoC" to the summary.

The young man thought that it was pretty obvious what kind of relationship that he and Zelda had, but people wrote him with others nonetheless. And most of the time, the Princess was portrayed as a spoiled brat.

I will realize that Link and Saria as a couple is wrong on many levels.

I will realize that Link and Ruto as a couple is wrong on many levels.

I will realize that Link and Medli as a couple is wrong on many levels.

Hyrule's hero agreed with these whole-heartedly. Saria and Medli were good friends of his, despite the fact that he happened to be in an Ocarina of Time setting, but he was not a pedophile, and he just wasn't interested in having a romantic relationship with bird people. The same applied to the Zoras.

I will always remember what characters are in a scene so that they may do something other than stand around.

Link remembered reading a story that featured a fight scene where he seemed to disappear all of a sudden. The reader could only guess that he stood around the entire time. He also believed that writers needed to make sure that their fight scenes actually made sense.

I will proofread my story.

The Hero of Time thought that this line explained itself.

I will pay attention to constructive criticism, provided my reviewers are brave enough to give it.

Constructive criticism was a great gift. The problem was, many people were too afraid of making somebody mad and always praised a story, no matter how terrible it was, while others were just jerks. He also felt that it was really annoying for reviewers to write a script in their reviews. Even more so whenever they used characters from the story. In fact, it got worse when the characters in the review proceeded to argue with each other.

I will not write whatever happens to be the fad of fanfiction at the time.

Link rolled his eyes, remembering the vast amount of Ocarina of Time novelizations, rewrites, and bloopers he had seen. He had had enough. However, it was true that some were actually very good.

I will learn basic grammar.

I will develop a vocabulary larger than that of a fifth grader's.

He was surprised that this wasn't blatantly obvious. Never again did the hero want to see the phrase "Link beat Ganondorf" or anything similar in a story.

I will never refer to my abilities as "freaking good."

Link believed that authors shouldn't do anything similar. And if they were going to do so anyway, they should not post it in their story.

I will accept the fact that Sheik and Zelda are one and the same.

Again, the hero thought that this was obvious. One merely had to play Ocarina of Time or Super Smash Bros. Melee to find out.

Under no circumstance will I write a Marth/Zelda fic.

Link didn't see why anyone would, seeing as how the two were from different games. He also wanted people to stop fantasizing and pairing themselves with him.

I will learn to spell the names and places in the Zelda series.

As much as he hated his foe, Link was fed up with seeing "Gannondorf" all over the place. He was also tired of Hyrul, Aganem, and the vast amount of ways to misspell Sahasrahla.

I will never write a lemon. If thus tempted, I will take a cold shower and grow up.

Link again thought that this was self-explanatory and blatantly obvious.

I will never refer to Hylians as "elves."

Link cringed. He was a Hylian, not an elf. He did not live in Middle-Earth, he did not work for Santa, and he did not make cookies.

I will never write a Mary Sue. Ever.

Some original characters worked out, others did not. This was due to the fact that many of them were absolutely perfect. Some stories portrayed random people suddenly popping out of nowhere and being better or as good as Link, the goddesses-blessed Hero of Time.

Link rolled up the Creed. He placed it in the shaft of light. It dissolved into thin air, transporting to an alternate dimension and onto the computer world known as the Web.