Disclaimer: this story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Play My Game

Chapter Three – Crash-course in being Harry/Voldie

'I told you, we WILL NOT tell Bellatrix bloody Lestrange or Lucius Malfoy!' said Harry, pacing up and down the thick rug. For the past half hour, they've been arguing over whom to tell. Harry, of course, proposed Ron and Hermione, but Voldemort was absolutely against the idea to tell a Weasley and a mudblood, both firm supporters of the light side – so who did he propose? Of course, bloody Bellatrix and Lucius. Besides the fact that Harry was sure to flip if he ever saw the bloody woman again, she was half-crazy from prolonged exposure to Azkaban. Not that she didn't deserve it. As for the elder Malfoy, he was absolutely not about to take the risk of telling that power-hungry mongrel hemay in any way be vulnerable.

'But we will NOT tell your pet werewolf either! Or any Auror, much less Dumbledore himself!'

'And let me guess, the next one you propose is Wormtail?' mocked Harry. Voldemort let out the mental equivalent of a menacing growl. Harry could feel the frustration leak through their mental barriers. Even though they were speaking via the mind, they kept their shields up as to not let any stray thoughts wander.

'Sure, Wormtail would be the perfect choice! That bloody weakling would betray this and me as soon as anyone as much as threatened him! And I would know.'

'Still, you have him in your Inner Circle,' Harry pointed out dryly.

'What would you expect? The Inner Circle saw him helping me to regain a body,' Voldemort snapped.

'So he's a role model? No matter how stupid you are, if you keep licking master's boots, even if the rest of him is already half-rotten, you get to know his little secrets?' Harry raised both his eyebrows (mainly because he never really managed to raise only one).

'Exactly. The Dark Mark keeps them loyal; morons like Pettigrew keep them ambitious. You wouldn't believe just how many of my friends do things just to prove that they're better than a slimy snivelling piece of filth.'

'So we come to agreement, at last.'

Voldemort would have raised his eyebrow if he would've been in front of him. 'What, that Wormtail is stupid?'

'No, dumbass; we won't tell anyone. Back to plan A,' clarified Harry.

'So it seems, but only for the moment, until we can figure somebody else out. Though I really can't see you following my daily routine' - that was probably the first thing they completely agreed about all afternoon.

Harry sighed. 'The first thing you need to know is that you should avoid Dumbledore, Snape, and Remus at any costs, otherwise they'll figure it out in no time'

'I get that on my own, idiot. Conversely, what do you do if you actually meet them? From all the anger I've been getting from you through the bond...'

Harry blushed. 'Act normal, or as normal as you can, with almost everyone, including Ron, 'Mione, and Remus -and all of Gryffindor tower. Do not dare to snog, screw or suck anyone off!'

'An adolescent avoiding snogs, screws and blow-jobs?' Voldemort sounded amused.

'Yes, and don't stare after the girls!'

'Ah, such a delicious titbit! So you, the famous Boy-Who-Lived, are gay?' Voldemort purred, in what he apparently hoped to be a seductive voice. Harry shivered slightly, disgusted.

'For your information, I'm not interested in either. End of subject.' Harry proclaimed coldly. Voldemort felt taken aback, but stayed quiet.

In truth, the Dursley's had beaten any sexuality more or less out of him. The thing with Cho in his fifth year had been just that, a thing, his body reacting. Over the summer, a boy had approached him. When it threatened to go further than a few kisses, Harry had fled. Since then he had been purposefully not looking at anyone and deeply aware that he was ashamed of his own sexuality. He had spoken to Remus about this, and the Werewolf had said that it probably was fear of rejection combined with the guilt that Sirius could not do it anymore. Rubbish. What he had not told Remus was that Harry would not even wank because of this - before it had barely even crossed his mind, and later it made him feel strangely dirty. He personally assumed it was a side effect of the Dursleys, rather than of Sirius' death. He had never really opened up to anyone for fear of being ridiculed, of being called a freak, of being hurt, and, sure, fear of being rejected. Exactly what his family had done. He only briefed Ron shortly while on their first ride to Hogwarts because hehopedthe boy may understand; he didn't, but he hadn't pushed him away or shown any pity either, and that was as good as it could get. A sexual relationship was far more intimate thanmasturbating (whichwas, in his opinion,acknowledging that he longed to be touched, loved). He was far more independent than that. Besides, everyone he let close was in danger. Even his friends felt this faintly, even thoughhe had never told them of the prophecy, or of anything in between Sirius' death (though it had been Neville who hadhad told them about the veil) and him leaving Dumbledore's office.

Shaking himself out of his reverie, he continued with the briefing. If Harry found Voldemort's own silence strange, he didn't mention it.

'In front of your own house, I'm fairly indifferent though you would do well with a few sneers and glares. Badmouthing them and Snape is always welcome. As for Snape, if you meet him alone be as impolite and obnoxious as possible, and insult him while not straying from the school rules. In class it's the Dumbledore-method- be as good and falsely bright as possible.'

'My, how positively Slytherin of you' Voldemort sneered.

'I'll take that as a compliment' Harry narrowed his eyes, forgetting the Dark Lord wasn't in front of him. 'In any case, don't be eager about homework, let Ron beat you at chess, don't spend more time in the library than Hermione and you have DA lessons every Tuesday and Friday, and before you ask, it's the Defence Association. You teach children mid-level defence and stay away from Dark Magic.'

'I've heard of Dumbledore's Army, as you liked to call it. Apropos the aforementioned imbecile, what should I do with him, and what exactly is 'normal' to you? I'm quite sure my view of it is slightly different.'

'Normal is, I guess, being irritable at any mention of...' Harry trailed off, slight pink tinges on this cheeks.

'That mutt, Black?'

'Shut it, you sorry excuse for a zombie!' Harry glared at the mirror, wich still reflected Voldemort's face.

'Ah, I see what you mean. And Dumbledore?'

Harry sighed. 'Defiant, do not agree with him on anything if Moody isn't backing him.'

'Mad-Eye? You mean the paranoid old wizard who cursed a kid because he was holding a stick towards him?' Disbelief was clear as day. Harry wondered for a moment where Voldemort knew about such a trivial thing from, but shook the thought off. Of course he'd know about his enemies.

'Haven't heard that one yet, but one and the same; Why? Don't ask. Just that Moody doesn't value the art of subtle manipulations as much as the two of you do.'

'You don't cease to surprise me, kitten.' Voldemort chuckled.

'Well, I'm not all that saintly, as everyone makes me seem. Your turn now, Tom,'

Voldemort was silent for a few moments; Harry assumed it was to gather his thoughts. Surprisingly again, he didn't comment on the 'Tom' issue. For Harry it was just as well, far less uncomplicated that 'Voldemort'.

'You will have to call a meeting soon to tell Inner Circle the results of the Ritual. You will hold it at night so I can guide you through it. The Dark Mark is keyed to my magical signature, so it activates bytouch, by concentrating on who, or wich group you want to call. Use Wormtail, or some otherservant of minethat you find. Can you cast the Unforgivables?'

'I can't and I won't,' said Harry flatly.

'Can you use Legilimency?'

''Course not. Where could I have learned it from?'

'Do you know the Dark Arts?'

'No.'

'To you know how to act like me?'

'I've never tried, as you can immagine.'

'We are doomed.'

'I agree.'

Voldemort - Tomcontemplated again. 'You still have my brain, so in theory you could access the knowledge I gained over the years.'

'I'm thrilled' Harry muttered, sardonically.

'You should be. Unless you're a soul-gifted and no one knows, you shouldn't be able to get much more out of me.'

'Much more meaning?'

Heshrugged – or at least Harry thought he did. 'Personal appreciations, emotions-'

'Oh, you have those?'

'I'm not a doll, you know. Can I continue? Good, you can't access memories either, hence, just pure, undiluted knowledge.'

'Are you saying that I could pluck every single curse and thingy out of your head?' Harry sounded half-pleased, half-disgusted.

'It's not that simple. You have to be specific. Unless you know that the curse exists and want to look it up, you can't know it. Well, it would be logical for it to work that way.'

'Oh so it's like having one of those libraries in your head where you can only borrow books you only know the title of? Only this time it's the 'Voldie Library for Everyday Usable Curses'?' Harry smirked slightly as Voldemort sent a wave of aggravation to him.

'Can't you be serious for once? I'm not doing any of this out of pleasure, or to satisfy some perverse streak of mine. In case you haven't forgotten, I am Lord Voldemort'

'Wich is an anagram for Tom Marvolo Riddle. Face it, I can't kill you, you can't kill me, and I certainly won't spend any more time in this body just because of our resentment. In fact, that should motivate us...' Harry trailed off.

'So, my little kitten is starting to grow up. Funny I did not notice it; probably because you so rarely show it.' Voldemort managed to not sound mocking, but the add-on emotions betrayed him. Funny thing; Harry briefly wondered if Voldemort knew about them. Probably, he surmised. Given his past experience with his scar, he was fairly sure the same thing was happening on the other side of the link. He sincerely hoped that the usual pain punctuated his emotions.

Silence ensued, as neither knew what to say. Then-

'I shoul'd inform you that you'refriends are here to visit you!' He said 'friends' with a tone that reminded him of a vegetarian appeciating a raw steak.

'What?'

'The Granger girl and young Weasley, of course. Who else?They are arguing with the nurse-'

'Madam Pomfrey'

'Yes, yes, and are ostensibly winning.'

'So? Pretend!'

'My, I haven't figured it out myself.'

'Could you cutr out your sarcasm? We really don't need it now.'

He was silent for a few moments.

'While I deal with these two, look through those books on the desk. I'm sure you noticed them.'

Harry blushed, gratefulf that the link wasn't a visual one. The blush looked horrible on his cheeks, he noted looking at the mirror.

'Are you saying that the key to this stupid situations is on your desk!' Harry asked, trying not to sound too eacer. After all, it would be far too easy.

'How stupid can one be? If that would be the case I certainly wouldn't be holding a polite conversation with you.'

'What are the books then?'

'Whatever they may be, they are in no language you could understand. Those are the books in which I found the curse that did this.'

'Great.'

'There is one in Latin, however. Cast a simple translating charm on it – third-year level charm for Latin.'

'I saw it! The one on wich blood and soul are written!'

'The title translates roughly to 'Poetry of Dark Curses of Soul and Blood'.'

Harry gaped at the mirror. 'You picked this spell out of a bloody POETRY book!'

A/N: Well, I took long enough to get this out. As for the telling thing, it was placed at exactly 2000 words –the minimum I wanted my chapters to be :). Snoogle-lenght, if you will. Besides, it will be an issue later, though I've not yetdecided who to tell. As for the first two, I hope you are not averse to including some further slash, besides the main pairing; and, before you ask, those two will not be together; Well, I hope not. I have the basic idea for this planned out, but... Suggestions are therefore welcomed, though I'll remind you Voldemort does not remember the diary incident. R/R

EDITED 26.07.2005