He's waited more than seven-hundred-and-forty days, so waiting just one more shouldn't make that much of a difference, but Luffy's nearly frantic with need upon finally being this close to his swordsman yet unable to touch him properly. Today's been full of dozens of stolen glances and fleeting caresses since Zoro appeared alongside Sanji to strike down the other Pacifista attempting to lay waste to the pirates gathered on Sabaody, because there just hasn't been time for more- and oh, does he want more. So- SO much more.
The rubber man's hands ache to strip the clothing from his first mate's muscular frame so he can examine the changes wrought by the last two years with every sense he possesses. Trace the silvery patterns of scar tissue he doesn't recognize with fingertips and tongue and lips alike, cup his palms against pectorals that've not only grown even more massive than he remembers but are RIGHT THERE on full display within the gaping flaps of that long green coat with the swirling skirt- pectorals begging to be squeezed and fondled and marked repeatedly with the imprints of his teeth.
Just being in Zoro's presence, catching glimpses of the other man moving or even simply standing in his periphery, he's spent much of the day so aroused that it's been difficult to think clearly, his judgement hampered by the almost constant, half-mast erection rubbing at the inside of his shorts. He can't tell if his boyfriend's suffering a similar dilemma - the sash secured at his midsection and the partially-buttoned portion of the coat obscure his pelvis too well - but he's glimpsed the hunger in Zoro's gaze when it lingers on him longer than necessary. And it's been impossible to overlook how the swordsman's hand keeps straying to the handles of his katana, as though gripping them might be the only thing preventing him from reaching for Luffy.
They'd stolen a moment or two alone together at the railing earlier, while the others were distracted by Nami's explanation of ocean salinity, but it'd only been long enough to exchange a few quick words and for the most cursory inspection of one another's most prominent new scars - Zoro's left eye, Luffy's torso - before Usopp and Chopper joined them.
We haven't even gotten chance to KISS yet! Luffy huffs to himself while he, Zoro, and Sanji stand on the Sunny's lawn deck, each of them enveloped in the swim coating intended to let them travel beyond the ship.
His mounting frustration with being so touch-starved and unable to do anything about it even though Zoro's RIGHT THERE adds unexpected force behind the blow he delivers to the kraken's mantle, and he hits the sea monster quite a bit harder than he intended, and then everything and everyone's swept away in the current that carries them down, down, down into the abyss…
xxx
Luffy's not afraid- not exactly- when the bubble around him abruptly ruptures, the air around his body rising away in shimmering trails that tickle his bare arms and chest and legs before the chilly water rushes in to take its place and sap his strength, but he does experience a brief flash of consternation- a definite "oh shit" moment- before he catches sight of his first mate headed straight for him, using gigantic deep sea fish and jellies and other strange aquatic creatures like stepping stones to bound across the distance separating them.
Then Zoro's arms are closing around his body and hauling him into the safety of the swordsman's embrace and into the bubble where- gasping and sputtering- he's once again able to breathe.
"Luff-?" his boyfriend begins, leaning closer to examine his face in the rising darkness, but the Straw Hat captain cuts him short, crushing their mouths together and driving his back against the inner wall of the bubble under the combined weight of their colliding bodies. Whatever else he intended to say erupting as a startled "MMMPH!"
Luffy's drenched and still shaky from the fatigue caused by his vulnerability to seawater, but that doesn't prevent him from plunging his trembling hands inside Zoro's coat to grope desperately at every inch of exposed flesh within reach. Trying to claw his clothing aside to bare more of it, nails raking over his shoulders and tits, catching on his nipples, while he shoves his tongue between his partner's lips and towards the back of his throat.
Recovering quickly, Zoro gropes him back with equal fervor and a growl of impatience, fingertips digging into his flanks and buttocks through the fabric of his shorts as they strive to pull him closer. A hand seizes each cheek of his ass, dragging their groins flush, and- oh god, there- THERE, FINALLY- is his swordsman's cock, rigid and thrusting wildly against him as Zoro's still-clothed hips buck beneath him.
Luffy moans, his own lower body surging forward in messy, rhythm-less lunges. He catches his lover's nipples and areolas between thumb and forefinger, pinches and tugs, hauls on the tender tissue until Zoro cries out, voice muffled by their kiss. Craning his head sideways, the rubber man slides his tongue deeper, saliva escaping the corners of his mouth and dripping down both their chins as he uses his abilities to push the wet muscle farther down Zoro's throat than it ought to reach naturally.
Rough, urgent sounds burble out of his first mate's partially-blocked esophagus, spurring Luffy on, until he's grinding against Zoro so forcefully that it's beginning to hurt. The weave of his shorts is too coarse, rubbing painfully back and forth over his glans despite the heavy flow of pre-cum slicking the seawater-soaked material, but he can't stop. His body's functioning on auto-pilot now, desperately chasing the satisfying, explosive sort of release he's been craving for two years. Craving and denied, because it's the type of release he's never been able to achieve on his own and that he had no interest in seeking with anyone but the man he's now clinging to as though he might suddenly disappear again if he doesn't hold on tight enough.
Honestly though, even if he tried to stop his frenzied assault on his newly reacquired boyfriend's mouth and tits, he's not sure Zoro would LET him draw back long enough to reassess their situation. The older pirate seems equally powerless to resist the urging of his libido, pelvis jerking more and more erratically with every passing second and hands squeezing his ass hard enough to leave bruises.
This isn't anything like he'd pictured when imagining their reunion; not only are they both wearing entirely too much clothing, but it's also grown so dark at these depths that he's dependent on his sense of touch alone as he wrenches blindly at his partner's pectorals in the way he knows will drive him wild. Still, he wouldn't change a thing because finally- FINALLY- Zoro's hands are on him and his hands are on Zoro and their mouths are locked together, his tongue buried so deeply that he can feel Zoro swallowing convulsively around it.
His swordsman's body twists suddenly, flipping him over and reversing their positions so he's trapped beneath the older pirate, lying on his back in the bottom of the bubble. Tits press more firmly into his clutching hands, demanding his attention, and he gives it eagerly, sinking both sets of fingertips into the dense muscle and squeezing mercilessly. Groaning delighted laughter as Zoro shudders atop him in response, pelvis delivering a final flurry of frantic jabs and then pressing tight against him to flinch and twitch with residual spasms of pleasure while allowing the captain's continued thrusting to rock their bodies as one.
He came- he thinks disjointedly. Zoro came. I made Zoro cum in his pants. And the knowledge that his lover lost control like that because of him- because of what he's doing with his hands and his tongue and his stiff, throbbing shaft- sends Luffy over the edge as well. He whimpers against Zoro's widely parted lips as his dick begins to jump and jerk within the confines of his shorts, each convulsive movement releasing another spurt of hot fluid.
Zoro sags against him, heavy and almost uncomfortably warm in the limited space inside the bubble. A moment later, he feels clumsy tugging on his sleeve and the slick tunnel in which he's sheathed his tongue spasms, vibrating slightly as his boyfriend makes urgent noises and tries to speak.
He allows the appendage to slither free and retreat back to his own mouth, resuming its normal length, and then they're both panting and struggling to catch their breath as they lie sprawled together.
"F-Fuck, Sencho," Zoro exclaims in a wheeze, voice thick. He clears his throat. "About damn time, though. Thought I was gonna lose my mind before I could finally get my hands 'n my mouth on you…"
"Mmnngh," Luffy tells him in agreement, heart still racing within his rib cage. His hands remain inside Zoro's coat, petting his back and sides and- very, very lightly- his much-abused pectorals. There's a soft hiss as his fingers encounter the stiff bud of a nipple, and he strokes it apologetically with his thumb, gently circling the areola.
"... 'm gonna feel that tomorrow…"
"Does Zoro want me to kiss 'em better?" the captain teases.
"Hell yes."
Grinning although he knows his swordsman can't see it, Luffy guides him upright a bit and leans forward to nuzzle happily between his tits. Inhaling deeply to draw in the familiar scent.
"Are you SNIFFING me?"
"Maybe." He noses around until he locates the sensitive pebble of flesh he's looking for and extends his tongue again to lap over it.
"-ah!" Zoro tenses- and relaxes, sighing, as he continues administering licks interspersed with soft kisses. "Mmm, yeah- just like that." One of his hands releases Luffy's bottom and rises, cupping the same pectoral the rubber man's addressing and kneading the flesh roughly while offering it for him to continue. "... god, I fuckin' LOVE IT when you play with my tits."
"Shi-shi-shi… I know you do." He closes his mouth over the proffered nipple to supplement the flickering movements of his tongue with cautious but insistent suction. Aware of his dick stirring with renewed interest in response to the little groans and gasps of pleasure he can hear escaping his lover.
"Gonna need you, Sencho-" There's a pleading note in Zoro's voice. "Soon as we got the time 'n the space, 'm g-gonna need you- inside me- need you to fuck me. Fuck me hard 'n fill me up."
Head spinning with desire, Luffy sucks harder and adds the slightest hint of teeth, raking them oh so gently over his swordsman's hot, spit- and seawater-dampened flesh, and humming laughter in the back of his throat when his actions inspire choked curses. He tightens his grip where his arms have looped around Zoro's waist and throws his weight to the side, rolling the older pirate beneath him once again and clamping both legs around one of his thighs so he can grind against it while he continues mouthing enthusiastically at his pec for a bit longer before redirecting his attention to the thus-far neglected other side.
He loves the throaty noises rumbling out of Zoro's chest, so loud in the close confines of the bubble. Loves the way Zoro's obviously fighting so hard to remain still yet can't help shuddering and squirming under him, hips occasionally giving a quick series of rocking thrusts even though it'll be some time yet before his first mate will be sufficiently recovered for the undulating movements to do more than bounce him around a bit.
"Missed you- so bad," Zoro pants up at him. "Finger-f-fucked myself- at night in bed sometimes- tried to- pretend it was you- mmm- playin' with me, but- it wasn't the same… wasn't enough…"
Spurred to action by the mental image of his swordsman sprawled naked on rumpled sheets and pumping multiple fingers back and forth inside his own hole, eyes shut tight while calling out for him across all the miles separating them, Luffy fastens his teeth on the flesh filling his mouth and bites down until he starts tasting traces of blood mingling with his saliva. He hears Zoro hiss a curse, but his lover makes no attempt to flinch away or shrug him off.
With his tits hangin' out, everybody's gonna see all the marks I leave on 'em, he thinks- and feels his dick give an eager lurch. Grinding harder on Zoro's thigh, he laps at the ring of shallow punctures he's left encircling his nipple and areola. Sucks hungrily at the small wounds before wandering higher to deliver a sharp nip to the older pirate's collarbone. Takes one of his pectorals in each hand and squeezes, crushing them together, rubs his face into the deep line of cleavage his grip's created there.
"Luff- Luffy-" Addressing him in a voice gone so husky, it's a barely audible growl. "Need more, Sencho- gimme more." A wet noise in the darkness, the sound of Zoro swallowing hard. "Want you to- fuck my tits, while- while I s-suck you off."
It's all Luffy can do not to WHINE, but he chokes it back and kneads the handfuls of flesh he's gripping. "O-Oi, I'M the captain, I'M the one who gives the orders!"
Zoro's breath hitches. "... 'kay. What- what're your orders, Captain?"
"Zoro's gonna suck my cock while I titty-fuck 'im."
His first mate wheezes laughter. "Sure thing, Sencho. That- sounds like a- a great-"
Luffy squeezes harder, catching and rolling both erect nipples between thumb and forefinger as his tongue lolls out to delve between Zoro's pectorals and lash up and down the tight tunnel he intends to thrust his dick into, slicking the skin with his saliva, and his partner's sarcastic remark degrades into a low "ooohhh god, oh fuck, yes- Luuuffy-"
"-'m gonna-" he announces between wet licks, "-cum in your mouth, Zoro, 'n you're- you're gonna swallow." He pauses to sink his teeth into the same pec he'd bitten before, leaving another ring of marks that partially overlaps the first.
"Oh, fuck!"
"NO fuck, unless you swallow it all," Luffy promises slyly, excitement bubbling in his belly because ordinarily he doesn't bother playing these sort of games, but- "If Zoro wants me in his ass 'n wants me to cum inside 'im 'til his hole's all sloppy, he's gotta swallow everything I give him now." He gives his swordsman's nipples a hard yank to ensure he's got his attention. "You spill a drop- ONE DROP- you don't get my dick or my cum in your ass. Understand?"
"Sencho-"
"Understand?" he asks again, allowing the slightest hint of Haoshoku Haki to tinge his voice- not so much that it'll cause Zoro any genuine distress or discomfort, of course, but enough to make it crystal clear that he could drown him beneath a tidal wave of inescapable, indomitable will if he wasn't holding back. And to his delight, Zoro reacts just as he suspected.
A strangled mewl escapes the older pirate and only his hands tightening so dramatically on Luffy's waist and lower back prevent him from throwing the captain into the opposite side of the bubble when his pelvis slams upwards into the curves of his buttocks. "-gain!" he blurts, booted heels skidding on the slippery surface under them as he thrashes helplessly, words blurring into a barely comprehensible litany of desperate pleas. "Fuck-fuck-fuck, do-it-again, Luff- ohgodohgodoh- now-now-NOW, Sennncho, hit-me-again oh-gOD, pleasePLEASE, I'm g- I-think-I'm-!"
It's too damn dark- why's it so damn dark- I wanna see his FACE, Luffy thinks, reeling internally, cock abruptly so hard that everything from his balls to his heavily leaking tip aches like he's being crushed in a vise. I NEED TO SEE HIS FACE! Breathing ragged, shaft pulsing in time to his galloping heart, he hooks his fingers into Zoro's heaving tits like he's sprouted claws, the command "Zoro, CUM" bursting from his throat in the deepest growl he can muster.
His swordsman goes positively berserk beneath him, spine bowing, body arching so violently he closes the distance between Luffy's hat and the bubble's ceiling, smacking him into it hard enough to knock the hat backwards off his head to swing wildly on its string behind him and he knows this is all such a TERRIBLE idea and if they pop the damn bubble they're gonna DIE but he doesn't even care because he's never, EVER heard Zoro wail like that before- like his soul's being torn out of his body through his COCK- and maybe Luffy hit him with too much Haki that second time, maybe he should've been a little more careful and not quite so eager, but- but- but-
He can feel Zoro sagging down the wall, frame quaking and jerking as though electrified - I did that, holy shit - and even now, his boyfriend's scrabbling at him with unsteady hands, struggling to speak. Most of it emerges as gibberish- a whole lot of "oh-god-oh-god-oh-god" and "Luff-Luffy-LUFFY" and "Senchooo" tumbling out- but there's also "mouth- in my mouth" and "-want your cock, oh god, I want- I NEED your cock" and one long string of surprisingly coherent words that sounds an awful lot like "-gonna suck it down, milk you dry to the last fuckin' drop then lick every inch of your dick clean, so go ahead 'n gimme your cum- gimme ALL of it-" followed by more- followed by MUCH more- and the absolute filth dropping from his babbling lips makes heat blaze across the captain's cheeks, all the way to the tips of his ears.
He supposes he shouldn't be surprised- Zoro's always been really good at talking dirty, and it's been a long, long time- too long- since he's heard him go off like this, and it ignites a bonfire in his guts.
He's on his feet before he even realizes he intended to stand, fingers tearing open the fly of his shorts and hauling out his dick, groaning as he registers the slippery mess he made cumming in his shorts earlier and feels just how fucking HARD he's gotten again listening to his first mate beg unabashedly for the same thick shaft he's grasping with a fist already in motion, stroking. Groping for Zoro's head with the opposite hand, searching for his face in the dark, finding his jaws already gaping open and waiting, tongue held flat in anticipation of accommodating his girth.
Dropping into a crouch, he nestles his length into the valley of the older man's cleavage, tip bumping his lips, and then Zoro's hands are there, compressing the pectoral muscle into a tight tunnel around him, and he instinctively rocks his hips- and the hot cavern of Zoro's mouth envelops him. There's no tentative exploration and no teasing- his partner immediately lunges forward and tries to bury his nose against his pubis, sucking and slurping and deep-throating his cock as though blowing him's more important than breathing.
Gasping, Luffy seizes a handful of his hair, hips bucking hard. His other hand finds Zoro's jaw, fingertips brushing his piercings and sending the golden droplets of his earrings swinging and chiming and tinkling as they collide, and then he's forcing him against the side of the bubble, pinning him in place to fuck his tits and mouth and throat with fast, harsh thrusts.
Zoro's pecs flex- and stay tensed. Squeezing him, directing his movement so each plunge of his pelvis delivers the blunt dome of his glans through his swordsman's pursed, sucking lips and over his tongue, past his uvula into the convulsing tunnel of his esophagus. Freeing his boyfriend's hands to grasp at his waist and hips, short nails raking lines of fire across his damp skin while they struggle to find purchase. And the noises he's making- they go straight to Luffy's groin, making his balls tingle and throb. Grunts, gasps, and appreciative moans interspersed with lewd, wet squelches as he allows drool to roll down his chin and drip onto his chest, slicking the tight passage formed by his tits.
Once again he curses the dark, because he wants to SEE Zoro's lips wrapped around him, see his face slowly flushing darker from lack of oxygen, in addition to the overwhelming barrage of sensation and sound.
He's only dimly conscious of his shorts being clawed down his thighs to bare his ass, but when hands seize and spread its globes to gain access to the pucker between them, he's very much aware of the index fingers meeting at the edges of his hole to trace delicate half-circles along its rim, massaging, alternately teasing him open and pressing him closed back there. In front, the intensity of Zoro's suction increases, tongue squirming and slathering at the underside of his dick, and oh god, Luffy's barely started driving into that talented, oh-so-clever mouth but he's going to cum again already.
He pulls Zoro's hair in his agitation, yanking the older pirate's head slightly sideways, and shudders, uttering a low cry of urgency, as the cocky bastard LAUGHS at his loss of composure, making the slick heat around him vibrate. One of the fingertips toying with his anus presses on its center, wriggles the first couple of joints inside and begins gliding around and around and around, tugging his rim as it moves, stretching him open to admit a second digit.
At the same time, Zoro's lips curl back slightly to bare his teeth, and the sensation of them grazing ominously against the vulnerable flesh Luffy's thrusting between them sends control spiralling out of his grasp.
He groans as his shaft starts to jerk, and his swordsman immediately takes him as deep as he'll go and holds him there, the convulsions of his wet, gulping throat coaxing out another jet of cum. And another. And then, with the orgasm continuing to throb in his groin and lower belly and thighs, the rubber man feels the hand not fingering his ass slip under him to palm his balls, juggling and squeezing them gently against one another in a way that makes his eyes try to roll back in his head because Zoro's continuing to suck and swallow, suck and swallow, in endless patient repetition as though determined to wring every last dribble and drop from his quivering body.
True to his word, his lover keeps licking and slurping at him for quite some time after he's finished blowing his load, agile tongue cleaning the spatters of cum from every inch of his slowly subsiding erection, until he's panting and squirming from the increased sensitivity. Not wanting to relinquish Zoro's mouth but so overwhelmed by the heat and pressure and unyielding suction keeping him semi-hard that he can't stop shaking uncontrollably and using his boyfriend's hair to pull his head forward or yank it back whenever the intensity crosses the line from pleasure into pain.
Zoro does eventually release him, but it's with obvious reluctance, as though he'd be happy to warm the captain's cock in his mouth and throat for much, much longer. "F-Fuck, Sencho…" he rasps, voice hoarse from having his esophagus stretched so wide for so long. "You been- savin' it up for me?"
Equally winded, Luffy takes a stumbling step backwards, trips on the shorts that've fallen around his ankles and sits down hard. When his bare butt connects with the floor of the bubble, he bounces a couple of times and giggles helplessly at his own lack of coordination. "D-Didn't- didn't have much time to- jerk off, not when- when I spent so much of it training. 'Sides, it wasn't nearly as fun, not without Zoro there to watch or to help."
"Know what you mean," Zoro admits, and then he snorts laughter. "It was pretty hard to stay focused on my dick when I never knew if Hawkeyes might decide to randomly attack me in the fuckin' shower or some shit. Or if Perona was gonna get bored 'n either astral project herself through the bedroom wall or send one of the ghosts through it to find out what I was doing."
"Was animals in the middle of the woods for me," Luffy commiserates. "Got distracted one time when I got hard 'n decided I really, REALLY needed to bust a nut, 'n I almost got my butt bit off by a gigantic-ass crocodile! An ACTUAL gigantic-ass crocodile," he hastens to add. "-not a gigantic-ass Crocodile." And decides maybe he ought to amend that last statement too, just in case Zoro's confused. "-OR Crocodile with a gigantic ass."
His swordsman's wheezing breathless laughter is music to his ears, and he crawls back between Zoro's widely splayed legs to flop against his chest with a long sigh of contentment, ignoring the tangle of fabric his shorts have become around one ankle.
A hand calloused from gripping katana handles finds his bare lower back in the dark and traces rough fingertips up and down his spine before dipping them into the crack of his ass to caress the softer, more sensitive skin there. The rough texture of their pads makes him shiver and try to arch more firmly into the touch.
"Mmm, you're just like a cat-" Middle finger rubbing over his opening, circling the slightly distended pucker. "-doin' the thing where they hike their ass in the air when they're ready to get f-"
Luffy snickers around the mouthful of pectoral muscle he's just seized as the rest emerges from his lover's throat in a long, wavering exhalation of "fuuuuuuck" and flicks his tongue-tip back and forth over the nipple he captured in the process of placing the massive bite. Laps at the stiff bud, sucks, his own breaths exiting in harsh pants now because Zoro's plunging that single finger in and out of him, palm meeting his buttocks again and again with a rhythmic slapping sound that's incredibly loud inside the bubble.
Groaning, he draws back to catch the nipple between his teeth so he can tug on it, fingers busy plucking at its twin on Zoro's other pectoral. Satisfaction surging through his pleasure-fogged brain when the other man moans and starts finger-fucking him even harder. Bet he cums just from me playin' with his tits…
Once again, he resents the darkness for hiding his boyfriend's face. He wants to suck and lick and bite and squeeze until he brings Zoro to orgasm, watch his face contort, see his brow furrow and his lips part in a final gasp before the impending climax finally strikes, crashing down and rolling him under so he's writhing helplessly and begging Luffy to take him, fuck him hard and fast while the spasms are still traveling through his body.
He can't stop thinking about how tight and hot his swordsman would feel clenched around his dick while he's cumming, slick inner walls not just hugging his shaft but closing on it like a fist… each muscular contraction stroking his length from root to tip, a silent plea for him to spill himself inside… and all at once, he's biting Zoro harder, tasting copper on his tongue again, and clawing at the sash and coat and trousers preventing immediate access to his body.
Zoro tries to assist him, but in their joint excitement they end up hindering each other more than helping, their attempts to loosen his sash and part the lower portion of his coat flaps proving fruitless when they end up yanking the cloth in opposing directions at the same time.
The struggle rattles the three katana secured to his first mate's side, and Luffy's about to grab one of those and just CUT the stupid cock-blocking belt thingie that's in his way because he feels like he's going to absolutely lose his goddamn mind if he can't wrestle Zoro's pants off- or at least shove them down far enough to bare his ass- and get his desperately aching dick inside the older pirate NOW, when he realizes he can make out faint glints of light gleaming here and there on the metal bits of the swords' handles. A glance upwards reveals the outline of Zoro's body looming over him, backlit by a glow that's becoming steadily brighter.
"Sh-shit," his swordsman pants, head jerking up, the rest of him frozen in place with one hand still gripping his crotch where he'd been kneading himself through the fabric of his trousers. "We got company?" He tries to twist his torso around to look at whatever's approaching, seems to register that he's holding the wrong sort of sword in the event they're actually under attack, and releases his cock to grab for a katana.
Luffy, on the other hand, keeps right on gripping himself even as he scrambles upright to peer over Zoro into the sea beyond. He's hard enough, he muses, that he could probably clobber an enemy into unconsciousness with his boner- which would honestly make an interesting battle tactic. Definitely way too stiff to swing like a whip- I wonder if I could use it like a club 'n just whack somebody over the head with it? Hmm. Maybe if he coats himself with Busoshoku Haki first, makes sure he's only damaging his opponent and not himself too? Yep, that's definitely worth considering, but even more importantly- if I'm gonna blow it up real big 'n use armament on it, the attack's DEF'NITELY gotta have a cool name. Somethin' liiiiiike- KING DONG, or-
Thoughts of employing one or more of his numerous abilities on his dick evaporate as he catches sight of what's headed towards their shared bubble: some sort of gigantic anglerfish, its orb-shaped lure glowing like a star, and clinging to the rod supporting the lure-
"SANJI!" he yells, nearly smacking Zoro in the face with his erection- bobbing freely now that it's been released- as he climbs onto the startled first mate's shoulders to slam his face into the side of the bubble, using one hand to support his weight while he waves frantically in their approaching cook's direction with the other. "Zoro- look, it's Sanji! Shi-shi-shi, check it out- he's riding a fish!"
"Fantastic. Now where- OI, what the fuck, Sencho, would you put your goddamn dick away already before it pokes out my OTHER eye!"
"Hang on, Zoro- I think- OH OH OH, IT IS- IT'S THE KRAKEN! THE KRAKEN'S RIGHT BEHIND 'EM TOO 'N- …oh."
"WHAT, Luffy? What the hell's 'oh' s'posed to-"
"Uh, so Sanji's bubble popped- but don't worry- he's close enough, I can grab 'im, no problem! Scoot over, 'kay, Zoro, while I pull him i-"
"... oh, fuck me, no- you've got to be kidding m-"
"-GOMU GOMU NOOOOOO-!"
"-O! ABSOLUTELY NOT. THERE'S NOT ENOUGH ROOM IN H- OOF!"
"UNFH! H-Holy shit. For a second there- I thought- I thought I was a goner…"
"HI, SANJIII!"
"Lu-? ... WH-WH-WH-WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, LUFFY- WHERE ARE YOUR FUCKING PANTS? GET OFF ME! OI, MARIMO! MARIMO, C'MERE 'N GET YOUR SHITTY BOYFRIEND OOo-fff… off…"
"... heh." "... Sanji?"
"... oh, oh no. No-no-no-no-NO. Please- PLEASE, tell me you guys didn't. You DIDN'T-"
"Don't look at me, number seven. I was just followin' captain's orders."
"Shi-shi- huh? Oi, Sanji, wher're you-?"
"LEGGO, GODDAMNIT- KEEP YOUR CUMMY MITTS TO YOURSELF, YOU SHITTY RUBBER! I'M TAKING MY CHANCES BACK OUT THERE WITH THE FUCKING FISH."