Disclaimer: I don't own Kodocha

AN: Katsuko's thoughts appear like this:   ~( What am I going to do?! )~

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Delusional

Chapter Five:

Selective Hunger and Unrequited Love

By Ame Kuroi

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The bell rang for the end of lunch as students began to file back into the classroom. Katsuko sat slumped in her desk staring at the note concealed carefully in her lap. Her mind was racing with confusion.

~( How could he be in love with me? )~

She lifted her gaze to watch her classmates slowly appear through the door.

~( The last time… the only time he's spoken to me, he only wanted to copy my notes because he had slept through the entire lecture. )~

The Hayama-kun walked in. Katsuko shrank down in her chair attempting to disappear. From over the top of her desk, she watched him walk across the room and drop stiffly into his seat without even glancing at her. Katsuko looked back at the note for the umpteenth time to make sure she had read it correctly.

~ (     'I Love You    - Hayama'     ) ~

She sighed.

~ ( I'm in trouble. ) ~

*          *          *

His heart beat rapidly, thudding mercilessly against his chest. The clock ticked second by second as Hayama watched it impatiently. Class finally let out and Hayama raced out of there to avoid any confrontations with Kurata after she got the note.

He'd managed to force his way to the front of the school without any problems, just a few more steps and he was home free.  Yea right!  Hayama had just cleared the buildings when he heard the fateful:

"HA-YA-MA-!!!" In a voice that was too unnaturally happy not to be recognized immediately.

:: ( Damn. ) :: He stopped.

"Ha. Ya. Ma!" She stuttered as she bounced to his side. "Ready to go?"

"Huh?" Hayama cocked an eyebrow at her.

"You've got to help me study!" Her cute smile suddenly wiped from her face. "I nearly lost my mind I Al--- Alge--- Alge---"

"Nearly?" Hayama smirked, rewarding himself a direct hit of Sana's Portable-mallet on the back of his head. "Ite!"

"Serves you right!" Sana scoffed before marching indignantly on ahead of him. "Come on, Hayama!"

He sighed and started to follow before he remembered:

:: ( THE NOTE!!! ) ::

He stood there for a minute trying to sort through his tangle of thoughts before the melee of confusion was interrupted.

"HAYAMA! HURRY UP!"

Hayama rushed after the screaming Kurata, still trying to figure out what had happened.

*          *          *

The pair arrived at sana's house just as Sana was about to give Hayama his just-desserts for another snide comment. Hayama followed Sana as she weaved her way through doors and hallways into the kitchen.

"Okairi, Sana!" Shimura-san looked up from the pot on the stove. "Ah! Hayama-kun! Irashai!"

"Konnichi wa, Shimura-san." Hayama nodded in acknowledgement. Sana froze.

* ( Was Hayama just polite? ) *

"Hayama!" Hayama jumped slightly in surprise. "What's wrong with you?!?"

"Nothing!" He looked at her like SHE was the one with some mental dysfunction.

"There's something wrong! I know it!"

"There's ... NOTHING… wrong!"

"Stop denying it!"

"I'm not denying anything!"

"I know you are! Spit it out!"

Hayama just glared at her, shaking his head.

"Come on, Hayama. Apprentice is the first step to re-nunnery."

"FINE!" he hesitated, "…I'm hungry…."

"Oh! Hayama-kun, why didn't you say something?" Shimura-san jumped up from her seat. "What would you like?"

"Sushi."

"See, I KNEW something was wrong!" Sana grinned. Hayama rolled his eyes.

"Hayama-kun, I'm sorry, but we don't have any sushi. Would you like something else?"

"No , that's okay." Hayama headed out the door.

"Hayama! I thought you were hungry?!?" Sana raced after him.

"I was."

"Then why didn't you eat anything?!?"

"I was only hungry for sushi."

"WHAT!?! You can't just be hungry for sushi!"

"Yes you can." He kept walking, having absolutely no idea where he was going.

"Prove it!"

"I just did."

"That doesn't count!"

"Well to be more scientifically correct, it was a theory developed by the late Glutinous Maximillious in the height of the Greek Empire. He was amoung the first to relate the bodily needs to the crave of the taste buds and the chemical lust for a food that runs through a man's mind. Working under the influence of Mozart and Pablo Picasso, he was able to develop the mathematic equation:

x   =   y2 +  lim      [x2 – 2x + 1] x  –  y3/2   +   w1/2   +   a2 – b2   - 6

                 x      7                                            2             c2                  

using only Roman numerals. And so through the process of composition, excommunication, fermentation, derivation and simplification he was able to make

 x = y and so conquered the Universe and proved 'selective hunger'."

Sana stared at Hayama, completely unaware of her gaping mouth. Luckily, her mind had stopped processing immediately after she heard the first 'x =' and she was able to retain her consciousness.

"When did we learn that?!?" She asked after a painful silence.

"Last class… while you were asleep."

"Oh."

…        …        …

* ( My head hurts. )*

*          *          *

Hayama trotted up the stairs behind Kurata still silently laughing about his little monologue earlier. 

:: ( I bet she really believed me ) ::

Then he sighed resigning himself to his troubled thoughts.

:: ( She should have said something by now… maybe she's ignoring it… maybe she's pretending she never got the note… maybe… ) ::

They reached her room, or rather Sana stood outside the door impatiently waiting for Hayama, she had skipped ahead and her face was wrinkled in a short-lived scowl.

"Come on, Hayama!!! I've got a test tomorrow!"

"So do I," he muttered low enough as to avoid any consequential injuries to his comment.

"What was that?!?" Sana eyed the guilty Hayama quizzically.

"Betsuni."

Though unsatisfied, Sana let it slide seeing as she was in such a forgiving mood.

*          *          *

Three hours of lethal Algebra lessons passed.

*          *          *

Sana was pleased to find that her math skills had radically improved, particularly in addition and long division, despite Hayama's consistent snide comments of her predestined doom for the math test tomorrow.

"Subtract, Multiply, Add, Divide! Add, Subtract, Multiply, Divide! You can handle it all with San a as your guide…" Sana rapped as they both took a break from the frustration.

"Could you keep it down? I swear if I hear another verse I might just start singing with you. And Kami knows what kind of brain damage that might inflict on me!"

Sana turned to glare at the aggravated Hayama munching conveniently on HER food.

*( Grrr… )*

"Hayama! If you don't keep quiet while I'm singing I'm going to take away that food!"

"Fine, go ahead," Hayama retorted indifferently pushing his plate towards her, "I'm done anyways."

Sana fumed.

"Back to studying?" Hayama offered quickly, noting the agitated narrowing of her eyes, but he was too late, as Sana's fingers were already wrapped around her well-hidden mallet, and his clipped utterance of pain was soon to follow the trademark rubber squeak.

Sana found herself in a much happier mood after her vent of frustration on Hayama's head and she skipped up the hall to her room.

*          *          *

Hayama struggled though the last hour of algebra with Kurata before both their brains protested by refusing to work for at least another 6 hours. Kurata was still in the noticeable happy mood after hitting him on the head earlier.

:: ( Quite unnecessarily ) :: Hayama thought to himself.

And Hayama was still unsettled about the whole of today – and yet to take his revenge on Kurata for the lump on his head.

All in all, both moods were quite the opposite of the other.

Hayama couldn't help noting – or smiling against his will – Kurata's gratitude for him helping her to prepare for the test; Even if it only brought her fated failure up a couple percents.

"Hayama! What would I do without you?!?" Kurata chimed as she showed him to the door.

"I honestly don't think there would be much difference---" He was cut short.

"You're the best friend anyone could ask for!!!" Kurata beamed overtaken with delight but Hayama's stomach lurched.

"Friend?" His step faltered.

"Yeah, best friend." Kurata glance back at him as they turned another corner.

"What about Fuka?" He asked trying to mask his emotion, whatever it was, he was too confused to discern now.

"Well… her too."

"You can't have two best friends."

"Why not?" Kurata stopped. They had reached the front hall.

"Cause… You cant!" Hayama was frustrated with the subject, frustrated with her ignorance, and frustrated with his lack of articulation.

"Says Who?!?" Kurata was immediately aggravated by the tone and level of his voice.

"Everyone!" Hayama lost control and let the volume in his speak what he could not in words.

"Fine! We can just be friends!" Sana was again lost in the adrenaline of the argument. The subject was lost to emotions.

"Just friends?" Hayama's voice dropped considerable as the second meaning slapped him across the face.

"What's wrong with being just friends?" Sana lowered her voice as well but was thoroughly confused by Hayama's sudden relapse.

"I DON'T WANT TO BE JUST FRIENDS ANYMORE?!?!" Hayama screamed out his disappointment hoping to leave himself empty and unfeeling.

"Hayama… you don't want to be my friend anymore…?" Sana's eyes were wide with either fear or confusion, neither of them knew which.

Hayama turned his back to her.

:: ( She wants to be my friend… maybe she's not ready to be anything more … … ) ::

He glanced over his shoulder. Sana's head was bowed as she stared down at her feet as though they would have the answers to her confusion.

:: ( She wants to be my friend… maybe she's afraid …  ) ::

He turns to her. She looks up and a timid smile wavers on her lips, asking him: 'do you still love me?' He smirks. Her faltering smile vanishes in a grin.

:: ( I can wait... ) ::

*          *          *

Katsuko lay on her bed staring at a blank ceiling. Pale green curtains danced before the open window as the cool wind stroked her cheeks.

~( He really loves me… )~

She turned to the mirror.

~( He really loves me… )~

She smiled.

~( I could love you too… Hayama Akito. )~

*          *          *

The tests were placed face down on each desk the next morning in Algebra. Hayama sat at the back of the class with his chin propped against his hand. Sana was fidgeting nervously in her seat, trying not to think lest she forget the formulas she'd memorized. 

Kosaka Sensei was in the corner, red pen in one hand and stop watch in the other. Everyone watched as his eyebrows ticked with every passing second before he suddenly yelled "Begin!" The rustle of thirty-seven papers turning over relinquished the silence.

And it began.

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Friendly Neighborhood Dictionary:

Okairi -  welcome home

Irashai -  welcome

Kami -  god

AN: Okay, first off, I would like to sincerely apologize for my tardiness. I could blame it on several things: lack of motivation, midterms, my best friend coming from Oregon, etc. but none of that is much of an excuse. So again, I apologize! I really do feel bad about procrastinating soooo much. Second, for those of you who are interested, the way you would pronounce Hayama's little equation is:

x equals y squared plus the limit as x approaches seven x squared minus two x plus one all multiplied by x minus y to the three halves power plus w to the on half power over two plus a squared minus b squared over c squared minus six.

Lastly, some of you might have noted my change in style from my other chapters, if not don't bother urself in trying to find it, but if you did notice: what do you think of it? Better or worse?

Till nxt time

:: Ame Kuroi