Last Chapter...
"Come on, Hiei, let's go," Botan said as she led him out of Koenma's office.
Love Me, Hate Me, Just Don't Let Me Fall
Chapter 5: Dead Stuffed Bear?
Hiei followed Botan past the mass of Reikai workers and into a hallway, then into another room labeled "Ferry Girl Lounge". Inside, it had a television, several chairs and couches, a small coffee table, and a few vending machines. On the walls were several paintings of King Yama, and a few colorful tapestries. On the floor was a rug with the Reikai emblem on it.
Botan walked up to one of the tapestries and lifted it, revealing a door. Using a key, Botan unlocked it. She explained, "The ferry girl lounge is for any ferry girl to use, but only the best ferry girls are allowed into the SECRET ferry girl lounge."
Hiei thought momentarily about how King Yama really needed to come up with better names for all the rooms in his palace. Secret ferry girl lounge... What kind of idiotic name is that?
Beyond the hidden door was a much fancier room than the ferry girl lounge. It had leather couches and chairs, a big screen TV, fancy paintings on the wall, Persian rugs on the floor, several tables, four computers sitting on different desks, and a fridge containing things one might find in a hotel room.
Once they both entered, Botan locked the door behind them, making sure nobody would be able to come in and interrupt them. Then she turned to Hiei and said, "Oh my gosh, you were sooooo great back there! You had me half convinced you loved me! Future mate! How do you come up with this stuff?"
Although she knew that Hiei didn't really care about her, she couldn't help but hope it may become true someday. Of course, this was utterly impossible, but a girl can dream, can't she?
"I'm a good liar," Hiei replied arrogantly. "And don't think that I'm doing any of this for you. I could care less about you."
Ignoring the hurtful statement, Botan exclaimed, "Thank you, Hiei! I know you're only supposed to pretend to love me, but would you please take whatever test Koenma has in mind and help me find him a girlfriend too?"
Hiei sighed, tired of this whole moronic idea already. "I already told you that I would help you, baka."
The blue-haired girl hugged Hiei tightly, even knowing he disliked it, and said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you! You've been sooo nice to me!"
"Hn," Hiei told her as he pushed her away, as if saying 'You're not welcome'. "Hug me again, and I'll leave."
"Aw, but you're such a cuddly fire demon! Like... a teddy bear!"
"...Teddy... bear!" Hiei got the mental picture of Botan hugging a 'cuddly' Kodiak bear named Teddy, and it was an extremely bizarre thing to imagine. Who in their right mind would want to hug a BEAR? Certainly not Hiei.
"You know, those stuffed bears ningen children play with?"
"..."
Stuffed bear? Like a dead bear that has stuffing put inside of it? This was sounding weirder and weirder to Hiei. What kind of ningen gives their children a dead bear for a toy? Hiei knew that ningens did strange things, but this was... disturbing.
Assuming correctly that Hiei had absolutely no clue what she was talking about, Botan said, "I'll have to show you sometime! Teddy bears are so cute and cuddly and huggable - like you, Hiei!"
Hiei briefly wondered how he, a powerful fire youkai, could be compared with the cuddly cuteness of a dead stuffed bear, but quickly dismissed the whole idea. Some of the things ningens do were better left ignored, for the sake of one's sanity.
Sensing that he was still confused, Botan decided to change the subject. "Well, while we're waiting, we might as well think of girls who might be able to date Koenma."
"Who cares? Let that godling find his own wife."
"Hiei! The sooner we get this over with, the sooner you can leave!"
The fire demon knew this was perfectly logical, and grudgingly decided to contribute. "...What about that girl - the one who hits Yusuke..."
"You mean KEIKO!" Botan shrieked.
"Hai," replied Hiei calmly.
"To date KOENMA!"
Not understanding what was wrong, he simply agreed, "Hai."
Botan glared at Hiei as if he were an idiot. "NO, YOU BAKA! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE LAST CENTURY!"
"Nani?" he asked, surprised at her outburst.
"Yusuke and Keiko are in love! Didn't you know that?"
"They're... in love...?"
"NO DUH, DIMWIT!" Botan exclaimed.
"They argue all the time, and Keiko beats him mercilessly... That is what ningens call love?" Hiei raised an eyebrow. Wow, first he discovers mankind's strange fetish for dead bears, and now their masochistic ways of love. This converstaion was becoming quite educational.
Botan sighed, frustrated with just how dense Hiei could be with the whole concept of love. "You just don't understand what love is..."
"Hn?"
"...But no matter!" Botan stood with her hands on her hips, feet wide apart. All of a sudden, she was standing on a very tall rock with ocean waves crashing behind her. "I'll teach you what love is, Hiei, no matter how hopeless you may be! You need some TLC in your life, and I'm going to be the first to provide it! I swear to kami-sama, cross my heart, and hope to die that I'll teach you if it's the last thing I do!"
Hiei gaped at her strangely. He didn't like the thought of someone declaring that they would teach him the meaning of love. It was not something Hiei wanted to learn about; not now, not ever.
Before he had a chance to retort, though, they heard Koenma's magnified voice say, "Botan and Hiei, please report to my office. I repeat, Botan and Hiei, please report to my office. That is all."
Without another word, Hiei followed Botan out of the two ferry girl lounges and into the hallway. They continued walking until they reached Koenma's office, and Botan knocked on the office door.
"Come in!" they heard Koenma say.
They both entered his office, ready to face whatever trials Koenma had for them. Botan silently hoped that Hiei would be able to pull it off. Sure, he might be a good actor, but how would he fare when trying to prove his fictional love for someone he hardly liked? Botan glanced at Hiei briefly, noting his unemotional expression, and silently pleaded that he wouldn't do anything stupid.