AN: I don't really know why I stopped posting this because Chamber of Secrets is complete. Prisoner of Azkaban - definitely not. This is one of my favorite chapters, so if you're still reading this, I hope you enjoy!
That Wednesday, Ginny joined the group at the Hufflepuff table for breakfast. She looked anxious, and her face was white.
Ron tried to cheer her up, but Anka had to roll her eyes at his attempt. Boys, honestly. When he mentioned hoping that Filch would be petrified before the person responsible got expelled, Anka stepped in.
"Ginny, I know it's scary, but I don't think you have much to worry about." Anka said gently. "First, once the Mandrakes that Professor Sprout has are ready, Sev- Professor Snape will be able to brew a Mandrake Restorative potion to revive her. So it's like she's just sleeping. Plus, you're a pureblood. You aren't really in danger from the Heir of Slytherin."
Ginny did not really look any better, but she changed to the topic to Quidditch, and that was that.
After lunch, Anka, Fay, Neville, and Ron made their way to History of Magic. As usual, the class was an utter bore. Anka tried to take meticulous notes in the class in order to stay awake, but honestly, it never made much of a difference. She would end up doodling or tuning Binns out completely to start planning out an essay or plan for her assignments that evening.
Therefore, Anka wasn't paying attention to the other students around her, and was really startled when Binns halted his monologue on some Convention in the 1200s.
"Miss - er -"
"Dunbar, sir."
"You have a question?"
"Yes, sir. I was wondering if you knew anything about the legend of the Chamber of Secrets."
The whole class seemed to perk up. Ron picked his head up off of his arm. Neville started and sat up straight.
"My subject is History of Magic," Binns wheezed. "I deal with facts, Miss Dunbar, not myths and legends." He started going back to his lecture, but Fay spoke again.
"But sir, aren't legends a part of our history? Even if it is just a myth?"
Binns blinked. "I suppose so." He considered. "This particular legend is ludicrous and bears no weight for this class."
He looked around at all of the students, who were giving him their full attention for what might have been the first time in his teaching career. He looked completely thrown with the change.
"Very well," He conceded, before launching into the tale. He shared some basic information about the origin of the school and the founders, and how they started the school and about the argument between Slytherin and Gryffindor that started the rivalry between the houses and caused Slytherin to leave the school. "All of that information is fact," Binns told them, "Based on information available to us from scholars. The story that you are asking for is just a fanciful tale."
He did proceed to tell them everything they had already read in Hogwarts, A History about the horror within a chamber that Slytherin had created before he left the school.
Everyone was still watching Binns, waiting for more information.
"It's all a bunch of arrant nonsense," Binns told them, insistently. "The school has been searched many times over the years, and there is no indication that this chamber exists. It is truly just a legend told to frighten the gullible. "
Fay raised her hand again. "Sir, what do you mean by 'the horror within?'" she asked, and Anka could tell that this was the point she was getting at. The information Binns had shared had been nothing that they didn't find out earlier.
"That is believed to be some sort of monster, that Slytherin's heir alone can control." Binns wheezed.
Everyone shuffled and looked at each other nervously. Anka glanced at Neville, who raised his eyebrows and shrugged.
"I tell you, there is no such thing. It does not exist. There is no monster and there is no chamber."
"But sir," Seamus asked, "If only Slytherin's heir could open the chamber, it makes sense that no one else would have been able to find it."
"Nonsense," Binns stated. "Centuries worth of Headmasters and Headmistresses have searched the castle. The thing doesn't exist."
The class started asking a lot of questions that Anka felt were valid, about Dark magic, and the person needing to be the heir, but Binns was done.
"There is no such thing, and I will not tolerate any further discussion of this topic in my classroom. Let us now return to history, to fact."
The class fell back into it's stupor to Binn's dull drone, now that he was done discussing the Chamber. Anka spent the rest of the class writing down the other student's questions and the information that Binns had shared. She jotted down some questions of her own, as well.
How would the monster petrify Mrs. Norris without being seen?
How would Slytherin have controlled the monster?
What monster can survive over 1000 years without being maintained or seen?
That evening at dinner at the Gryffindor table, Artemis flew down, a letter on her leg.
"Hey girl," Anka cooed, feeding her some of her dinner and retrieving the letter. Anka didn't get much mail, and she had a feeling she knew who it was from.
She flipped the letter over to find her name written in a familiar script. The letter was from Remus.
She had written him back towards the end of the summer, telling him that if he was making the decision to write infrequently, that he can make that, but that she would not be guaranteeing that she would be happy about it. She was clear that she was angry and hurt by his decision to effectively cut himself out of her life, and Remus had never responded to that letter.
Anka shoved the letter into her bag, trying not to give it much mind. Harry met her eyes, concerned, from across the table. Anka ignored him, and jumped back into the conversation, trying desperately to forget about the letter.
Up in the Gryffindor dorm, after curfew, Anka couldn't stand it. She got into bed and drew her curtains. She held the letter in her hands for a minute, turning it over. Finally, she opened it.
Anka,
I did receive your last letter, and I respect your decision. I will not be angry if you choose to stop corresponding with me altogether, if that is easier. I understand that this change is difficult for you.
I am interested in your life and your wellbeing, so that being said, I am going to continue this letter to check in with you.
How are your classes going? I remember second year being exciting because we were finally doing more hands-on lessons instead of all the theory that we study in first year.
How are you adjusting to Harry being adopted by Severus? I am sure that that is a change and required some adjusting on your part. I'm sure it's different now that Harry is legally Severus' son instead of the friend that you were inviting over.
Are you and your friends still meeting like you did last year? I thought it was fantastic that your group was so diverse with students from other houses, and I do hope that you keep that going. You are going to make major changes in house rivalries if you keep going on this trajectory.
I do hope that you are doing well and staying healthy. I am working at a bookstore right now, and I find it quite enjoyable. Last month was a bit rough, but I feel mostly recovered now and I am hoping that the upcoming month will be better.
Give my love to Severus and Harry.
Love always,
Remus
Anka reread the letter a couple times. She was still angry with him and didn't want to just act like things were normal. After debating, she decided to go with it. She couldn't change Remus' mind about his frequency of writing. Maybe taking what he was offering would be better than cutting him off completely or pushing him away with her anger. That didn't mean that she had to write to him like she did before. But she could talk about some surface topics, enough to keep him apprised on her life.
She started her letter.
Remus,
It was good to hear from you. I am still angry with you. But I am working on putting that aside and respecting the decision that you have found it necessary to make.
I will not guarantee that I will always respond to your letters. I don't have a ton of time, second year is a lot more work then first, but you're right, its more exciting actually doing magic.
Anka decided not to share how frustrated she would get at just seeing that he wrote her. The more she opened up to him, the more he could hurt her. And he had already proved that he would hurt her, even if it was unintentional.
I am thrilled that Harry adopted Severus. He is now essentially my brother, and he was already my best friend. It's not been much of an adjustment, and the little that has been needed has been positive, I think.
My friends and I are still meeting. Daphne and Theo only join us once in a while, when they are struggling with an assignment. We are still friendly with them though, but the study group isn't really their thing. Draco has decided that he does not want to be friends with the rest of us, so there is really only one student from each other house, plus all of us Gryffindors. I would like to grow it, but only naturally. Our group is close, and I don't want to invite people in that would make it difficult for us to open up to each other. We did invite Ginny, Ron's younger sister, and she's been a good addition. She doesn't join us all the time though.
I am staying healthy. Say, do you know anything about the legend of the Chamber of Secrets? I was reading about it Hogwarts, a History and I found it fascinating.
I'm glad you've been able to work, and I do hope that you have a better month this month than last.
Anka
There. Anka reread it, and was pretty happy with it. She didn't feel like she gave too much emotionally away, but she responded factually and responded to his questions. She'd send it with Artemis the next morning at breakfast.
She kept mulling over one of the lines. Legally Severus' son. She hadn't ever really dwelled on the distinction. She hadn't thought things had really changed between her and Severus with Harry being adopted, but maybe they had and she hadn't noticed. She tried to think of their interactions the last couple of months. She didn't think they were different. But legally, she knew that Severus didn't have any real rights over her. There was a lot she didn't understand about her arrangement, but she knew that much. But Harry was more Severus' child than Anka was now. Even if that hadn't changed things yet, would it?
It still was a long time before Anka fell asleep.
The night hadn't been as restful as Anka had hoped, and she didn't send her letter with Artemis, second guessing her decision to write Remus. Maybe she should wait longer, since it was going to take him months to respond to her. Should she really be responding the next day?
Anka was in a bad mood all day, avoiding the conversations with her friends as she tried to sort out her thoughts and feelings regarding Remus. Luckily, she made it through Transfiguration without a hitch, and History of Magic was back to being an utter bore that it always was. She knew she was distracted in Potions, but she paired with Harry, who helped her stay on track, and she got through it.
While they were leaving, Harry and Anka were just walking together, when Colin popped up in the crowd of students.
"Hey! Harry! A boy in my class- he's saying that you're-" Colin was taken away with the crowd, but this was just the distraction that Anka needed.
"What do you think a boy in his class is saying about you?" Anka asked, curious.
"Oh, so you're speaking again?" Harry joked sarcastically. She shrugged. His face became pensive. "Oh, probably that I'm Slytherin's heir." He admitted. "I've heard some whispers this week."
Anka would have stopped and gone back for Colin to get more information if she was able to, but she had to move with the current of the hallway too.
"What? Why?"
Harry shrugged. "Some people noticed that I wasn't at the feast. And I am in Slytherin."
"Well, don't worry, I'll find out what Gryffindors are saying that and-"
"Can you not?" Harry asked, exasperated. "Just leave it alone."
"But Harry, they shouldn't be spreading rumors about you! I was with you the whole night on Halloween, and so were Hermione and Fay. You didn't petrify Mrs. Norris."
"Obviously, I know that." Harry snapped. "But I can handle it myself. I don't need my sister coming and defending me all the time. It makes me look like I can't take care of myself, that I need you to come and do it for me. Just leave me alone, Anka." With that, he stormed off, leaving Anka stunned.
Anka made it to Herbology, but if she thought she was distracted before, it was nothing as opposed to now. She didn't realize that Harry didn't want her to defend him. But he was her brother. She wasn't just going to let members of her own house bully him with baseless accusations. But Harry didn't want her to do anything, and even worse, he was angry at her for it.
At dinner, Harry sat with Draco at the Slytherin table, and Anka picked at her food, not eating much. She didn't have any classes with Harry on Friday, so she didn't get a chance to see him. She had tried writing to him in their journals on Thursday night, and he didn't respond, so she figured that he was still too angry with her.
She went through the motions with her friends, trying to join in on their conversations, and getting through their classes. Fay finally asked her what was going on at lunch that day, and Anka brushed her off. Anka did hear that Harry had told the others that Harry needed to spend some times with his friends at Slytherin, because he had been abandoning them for meals, so to not expect him right now. She did feel a little better knowing that Harry wasn't talking to their friends about their row.
It came time for tea on Friday afternoon, and Anka had been debating going all day. She knew that Severus expected both of them there, but she didn't want to force herself on Harry if he didn't want her to. And Harry was Severus' adopted child, he had more of a right to be at tea than she did now. Anka reminded herself that she had had a lot of time with just Severus, and Harry had not had a healthy adult in his life, so he probably needed the time with Severus more.
Decision made, Anka headed to the library, not a spot she frequented often. She pulled out her transfiguration notes, and at some point, drifted off to sleep.
Anka awoke to someone shaking her shoulder.
"Anka?" Severus said, and she sat up, rubbing her eyes.
"Severus?" She asked. "What are you doing here?"
He tilted his head to the side, looking confused and concerned.
"What am I doing here?" He asked. "You missed tea and dinner. Are you feeling well?" He held his hand up to her forehead. "You don't seem to have a temperature."
She shook her head. "I'm fine, honest. I'll just go back to my dorm." she started putting her transfiguration notes and the essay she had been writing away.
"Anka-" Severus stopped himself, considering her. "Come with me." He instructed, turning away.
"Where?" She asked.
"Our quarters." Severus said, as if it was obvious.
Anka checked her watch. "It's nearly curfew," she pointed out. "I'll just go back to my dorm." She really didn't want to have to go and talk and hear Severus lecture her too. She was already at odds with Remus and Harry.
"I don't believe I gave you that option." Severus drawled. He picked up her bag before she could and started walking, forcing Anka to follow him to the dungeons.
Once inside, Severus ordered her to sit, and presented her with dinner and some tea. He also had a cup of tea, but she figured he had already eaten dinner.
Anka picked at the fish and chips that he had put in front of her, not really hungry, even though it was her favorite meal.
"Do you want to talk about what's going on?" He asked her, after about 10 minutes of her moving food around her plate.
"I'm just not hungry." She muttered.
"Well, I do believe I know at least some of the problem." Severus stated. "I know you received a letter Wednesday at dinner. From Remus?" Anka didn't answer. "I'll take that as a yes. And then yesterday, you and Harry had a row." Anka flinched, and fought with everything in her to keep tears from coming to her eyes, but she still didn't respond.
"Anka, look at me." She finally looked up at him, after feeling like she had gotten her emotions somewhat under control. What she saw in his eyes was… concern? That didn't seem right with what she had convinced herself of - that Severus would be angry with her like Harry was.
"Anka, you and Harry are best friends, but you are now also siblings. That gives your relationship some varying dynamics. Siblings fight. Best friends fight. And it can be scary the first time that you do, because you don't know where to go from there. But you will always have each other, regardless of how frustrated you get with each other at times. And I am not here to take a side with either of you, but to help you to resolve it. Will I tell you both when I think you are wrong? Yes. But I will help you work through to understand where the other is coming from, and I will always love you both. And I will always be here for both of you."
Anka couldn't help the tears that threatened to overflow from her eyes anymore. "He was so angry! He told me to go away," She choked out. "I didn't know that he didn't want me defending him! I swear! But how am I supposed to let people in my own house talk badly about him? I can't just listen to them and not say anything. What kind of sister or best friend does that make me?"
"Oh, Anka," He sighed. "I know that, child. And so does Harry, believe it or not. And you two will have to discuss it yourselves, but he isn't angry with you anymore, he thinks that you are angry with him."
Anka pulled her knees to her chest and looked up at Severus. "I'm not angry with him." She whispered.
"Then why did you skip tea this afternoon?" Severus asked. Anka just shrugged, not particularly wanting to share her reasons. "Anka, why did you skip tea?" he asked again.
She mumbled into her knees, not meeting his eyes. "I didn't catch that," Severus said, and he sounded frustrated.
She sighed. "I figured Harry was mad at me and needed space. So I was giving it to him." There, that wasn't the full reason, but it should be enough to get Severus off her case.
"Going forward, that kind of space does not extend to our weekly tea time. That's family time. Even if the two of you are not speaking, I expect both of you to be there."
Anka nodded. "Okay." She agreed.
Severus studied her. "That's not the only reason. Why else did you not come to tea?" He asked.
Damn his perception sometimes. She knew she wasn't going to get out of this part of the conversation. "I thought you'd agree with him." She admitted, looking at the table.
"Agree with Harry? About what?"
"He told me to leave him alone."
Severus seemed to be struggling to understand this. "So you thought I would want you to leave him alone too?"
She shook her head, but didn't say anything.
"You thought I would want you to leave me alone?" Severus asked incredulously.
Anka nodded and shrugged. "That's preposterous. I would never push you or Harry away from me, especially over something as ridiculous as that row you two had. Why would you jump to the conclusion that I didn't want you to come to tea? Did I do something that indicated that to you?" Severus asked her.
Anka shook her head, starting to feel like maybe she had been a bit silly.
"Anka, I can't help if I don't know what's going through your mind." Severus pointed out gently. "I need you to use your words."
It's like it all came out at once, everything that Anka had been feeling and thinking and dwelling on the past couple of days. "Well, Harry has never really had a parent, and I figured he would want to talk to you without me because he was upset with me and he's your actual son, legally and magically and everything and I'm not legally your daughter so I figured if anyone had a right to go to tea its him and Remus asked me if things were different now that Harry is legally your son and I told him no and I don't think they are but what if I was just missing it or what if things do change because you're really my only dad even if it isn't legal and I can't rely on Remus like I used to and if something happened and you couldn't have both of us anymore, I don't know where I'd go and-" she stopped, out of breath and sobbing, not even realizing some of what she had said had been things she'd worried about.
She felt Severus pick her up off of her chair and situate her in his lap, like he used to do when she was 5 and upset. She knew she was too big for this and should be arguing with him, but she just couldn't bring herself to that point, she couldn't stop crying. So she reveled in the comfort that Severus was giving her.
When she finally calmed down, she pulled back from his chest, and he handed her a handkerchief, and she gratefully took it to blow her nose. "I'm sorry," She whispered when she felt able to talk without crying again.
"Oh, Anka," Severus sighed. She pulled back to move back to her chair, which Severus allowed. But he moved his own chair so that their knees were touching, he was that close to her.
"I want you to look at me for this conversation and see in my eyes that I am telling you the full truth." She nodded, apprehensive. "Legality doesn't matter to me when it comes to how much I love both you and Harry. I do not love him more because he's legally mine, and I don't love you more because you've lived with me longer. Both of you are equally my children. Do you understand me?" He asked her, and it took her a moment before she nodded, seeing nothing but raw emotion and truth in his eyes.
"Now, I don't think that I realized just how severely Remus' decision to cut down on his presence in your life has impacted you until now. I'm not even sure you did. But I do think I understand. Your biological parents died. That wasn't in your control. Your other father is in Azkaban. While that means he made horrible decisions, those decisions were not directly related to his desire to care for you or be a part of your life. But Remus' decision feels incredibly personal because you've had a relationship with him your whole life, and now he is suddenly deciding for you that you won't be able to have the same relationship, and that must feel significantly worse. And it has you terrified that if he can do it, and he's closer legally to being your father than I am, then why couldn't I just up and make that same decision?"
Anka sucked in a breath, realizing that everything Severus said was exactly how she felt. "Yes," she whispered, not able to even try and deny it.
"I don't know how to convince you that you are worth it. I know a lot of adults have failed you. I would never just choose to not be your father. Never. Anka, I have raised you since you were 18 months old. You are mine, regardless of legalities. And while Remus is not allowed to raise you, should something happen that I would be unable to care for you, he and I have made a list together of people that would be appropriate guardians for you, and you know that. That list also extends to Harry. Remus is the person I appointed to make decisions for Harry as well so that he would be able to keep the two of you together. If he were unable to, he and I have both decided that McGonagall would make those decisions for both of you. And there are many people on the list of people that we have talked to and arranged to care for the two of you, should that situation ever arise. So the only way that you wouldn't be living with me is if I literally couldn't care for you. Then, the options that we have discussed that have agreed to care for you, are Professor McGonagall, the Weasleys, Andromeda Tonks, Madame Longbottom, and Madame Pomphrey."
"You've planned for that?" Anka asked, not having ever considered that he would.
Severus looked exasperated. "Of course I planned for that. Anka, the Potter's lack of planning is how Harry ended up with his aunt and uncle. If not for one sentence stating that Black wanted Remus to determine your care, who knows where you would have ended up. There are other people that are last resorts that I have written into my will. And I have specified people that you both are not to go to. I have done everything I can think of to keep you two cared for until you turn 17 if I am not available to do so."
"Thank you." She said, feeling a major sense of relief.
"You do not have to thank me." Severus said, exasperated. "I am your father. And I will spend every day proving that to you and reminding you of that if that is what it takes to make it sink in that my care for you extends to more than just an obligation. I love you. That won't change."
Anka swallowed. "Okay." She whispered. "Okay." she repeated, nodding her head. "I know that most of the time. But sometimes…" She trailed off. "Sometimes I overthink it."
"I know." Severus told her. "Can I read Remus' letter that he wrote you?"
Anka pulled it out and handed it over without hesitation. Severus spent a minute reading it before handing it back.
"There was nothing inherently inappropriate about the letter." Severus said. "However, I see where his statement could make you start overthinking since I have a better understanding than he does of your insecurities." He considered her for a moment. "For the future, I am going to tell Remus that all of his written correspondence needs to go through me. I can't help you process something when I don't know what is said, and I would like to avoid this sort of break-down again."
Instead of feeling anger, which Anka expected when he said that he was going to be reading all of Remus' letters, Anka felt pure relief. Her shoulder's relaxed and she smiled a little bit for the first time in two days. "Okay." She said. "Do you want to read my letter back to him?" She asked, pulling it out and handing it over as she asked.
Severus hesitated. "I am more than happy to read your letters to him if you would like. But I am not requiring that." He told her.
"I know," She said. "I want you to." She handed it over and he read it.
"This sounds good to me." Severus nodded, handing it back to her. "Are you going to send it tomorrow?"
Anka hesitated. "I don't know." She admitted. "He's waiting two or three months at least between letters - it doesn't really make sense for me to be sending him one the next day. It makes me feel like I'm at his beck and call, and I don't really like that."
Severus considered this. "I understand that." He admitted. "I can't tell you what the right answer is. What I do think is that you don't owe Remus anything. You need to choose what works for you, whether that is responding right away and putting it out of your mind, waiting a while to respond, or not responding at all. I will respect and support any of those decisions. It's up to you."
Anka nodded, considering. "I don't know yet." She admitted. "But knowing that you don't think there is a wrong answer helps."
"I'm glad." Severus told her. "Now, is there anything else going on in that head of your that we need to discuss?" he asked her.
"No," She said honestly. "We got everything that I know is bothering me."
Severus breathed a sigh of relief. "I'm glad. That means I can stop prying answers out of you that you don't want to give." She laughed a little bit. "Now, I want you to spend the night here. Harry is going to come by in the morning for breakfast for the two of you to talk. And I need you to eat dinner tonight. Can you handle that?"
With a grin and the first appetite she's had in weeks, Anka picked up her fork. "Yeah, I can."
Severus stood up and kissed the top of her head. "Good. I'll keep you company and you can fill me in on the other parts of your week."