Disclaimer: …*snore*… -.-zzzzzz…

Hey peoples!!! I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to update this chapter. I ran out of Internet hours! *wails* it isn't fair!!! I've just been able to log on now, so plz forgive me!!!

WOOP WOOP WOOP!!! 100 REVIEWS!!! *cries* I'd never thought I'd reach 100 reviews! Thank you SO much to EVERYONE has read and reviewed my fic =). Thanx go to:

RockeandRoll (^^ I updated! Woop!), TogetherAgain, Kari Elizabeth, Taichi Kamiya, Kyomi Evana, Shadow-of-Hearts, DigitalDreamer, taichi tower, *kari*, flipstahhz, Luna, K.B Aleo, Fantashamon, Sakura Blossom, Sylver*star, Butterfly-fire, Crest of Randomness, reader, TheAngelofLove - Kuroi, Kara Kasai, Sweet-lil-angel, Takari's Baybee, EllaJ.W, KarenSedai - Kibou no Tenshi, KawaiiCookie, TK Lover 1997, Jess the Dragonkeeper, koushiros girl, kitty, hail the platypus, Sailor Jupiter Heart, Ridley, Mala Draca, Moonfairy2000 and ArchangelUK!

Whew! I typed 'em all!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! =)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm running…

Running away from this personal hell…

I can't take it…

Let me go…

Let me go…

Never…

I sit up, breathing heavily. The pain in my chest slowly disappears. Shadowy outlines of my surroundings slowly loom in on me as my breathing calms down. A thin strip of moonlight glows on my sheets. I shiver, my dream flashing though my mind once again- terrifyingly clear. The same dream. The same dream I had when Sora was carrying me to the hospital. The blade piercing my chest wakes me every time. The pain is so real… it scares me. And that voice…I've heard it before…but where? I can't remember. I don't want to remember. I hear it all the time. But I've heard it before…somewhere else…

The Lady of the Shadows will join him…

Stop it! Stop it! Leave me alone! That voice keeps saying that! What does it mean? I sigh wearily, and feel around for the cup of water on the coffee table. I've been at Sora's place for the past four days. I passed out on Sunday morning, the day after Tai returned home, from a dangerously high fever. Tai was constantly sleeping, and our parents weren't going to be home for another six days, so Sora took us in. I just woke up later that day, and found myself in Sora's living room, with about three ice packs on my forehead. Since then I've been bedridden, unable to do anything but sleep and occasionally try to talk to Gatomon or Tai. Tai hasn't been talking much, and spends most of the day in front of the television. I sip my water thoughtfully. I guess he's bitter because he couldn't look after me. And his arm must be so painful. On top of that, he hasn't been to see Matt. He hasn't been able to see any of his friends, minus Sora, or play soccer. I feel so sorry for him. But Gatomon has been great. She's been there whenever I wake up, and ready to help me. I'm so grateful for everything she's done for me. Everything she's gone through. I look to the snoozing cat on the other side of the bed. I put down my glass, and lie back down on the sofa bed. But it's too hot. I sit up again, and look through the gap in the curtains. It's a cool night, why not go outside? I swing my legs over the edge of the bed, and slowly stand up. My head swims with the sudden change of position, and my legs shake from not being used for so long. I grab the edge of the sofa, and my head slowly ceases to spin. I slowly, and shakily, make my way over to the door, and push the curtains out of the way. The moonlight streams into the apartment as I fumble with the sliding door to the balcony. I barely notice the silhouette of a figure leaning on the barrier. I open the door, and let the cool breeze run through my hair and cool my face. I close my eyes and inhale deeply. It's refreshing to smell the outside world again. I open my eyes, and notice a certain brown-haired someone enjoying the evening. I walk up to him.

"Hello Tai," I say quietly, my voice breathy from a sore throat. Taichi turns to me, startled.

"Kari!" he says, worry evident in his tone, "What're you doing out here? You're sick! You should be inside!" I smile weakly.

"I wanted to see what the outside world is like, Tai," I reply calmingly, staring out into the city. "It's been so long since I've been outside, for any reason. Besides, it's too hot in there. It's nice and cool outside. Don't worry," I add, noting the look on Tai's face, "I'll be fine. I've got you. Thank you for always looking out for me." I lean against his shoulder in a loving way. "Thank you."

"For what?" Taichi responds despondently, the tone in his voice startling me. "I'm no use. I can't even look after you. I've always let you get into trouble, and never been there to protect you. Please don't thank me, because I've done nothing." Tai turns away, self-disappointment evident on his face. "I've always let you down. I've always let everyone down. I let you down… I let Matt down…I'm letting everyone down. So please don't thank me, because I'm not worth it." A stunned silence hangs in the air. I can't believe it…Tai thinks he's worthless? That he's letting me down? That he's let everyone down?

"Taichi!" I exclaim, aghast, "Nothing could be further from the truth!"

"No Kari," Tai states, his voice cracking slightly, "it's true. I've always let you down, and I'm scared I'll continue to." Tai turns around and slides down the balcony wall. "I'm so scared I'll continue to hurt you. I'm so scared I'll continue to hurt everyone else. I keep letting you and everyone down…" Tai buries his face in his knees. "I'm no use." His voice is so depressing… He can't seriously believe it…can he? I stand here, saddened that my brother thinks this way- that he's useless…that he let's everyone down. I kneel down next to him, and place a comforting hand on his shoulder. Tai flinches at the contact.

"Tai," I begin, "you know yours-"

"No Kari!" Tai interrupts, his voice becoming harsher. He pulls away from my touch. "I am worthless! I just cause people more pain! I keep letting everyone down! I do! I made you sick when you were little, I made Agumon dark-digivolve into Skullgreymon and nearly kill everyone, I let you collapse in the Digital World, and they're only a few of the incidents where I've screwed up! And now I've nearly killed Matt, nearly killed you and it's all my fault!" Taichi tightens his hold on his legs; tears streaming freely down his cheeks. I sit there. I have no reply. Nothing to say.

What do I say to this? Matt'd punch Tai outta this mood, and that seems to work… but I can't! I can't punch Tai. Taichi's breaking down on me and I have nothing to say.
See? Now your brother is breaking down, and you don't even know what to say. Some Child of Light you are.

I don't need you at the moment. Can't you see I'm busy?

Oh, sorry li'l miss shining-light. I'll go. But don't forget, Lady of Shadow…
Just go away!

"Tai," I begin again, injecting more confidence into my (unfortunately) raspy voice, "Without you, how would we have defeated all the Dark Masters, VenomMyotismon, or, as a matter of fact, any of the other evil Digimon who have threatened to kill us all? How would even us, the new lot, been able to defeat anything without your guidance." I gently place my hand beneath his chin, and lift his head. "Tai, none of us would be here today if it wasn't for you." Taichi glares at me, trying to look unconvinced, but I can see the confusion. "Tai, you've helped me get through this hard time more than anyone else. If you weren't there to comfort me or help me, then I probably would be jumping off this balcony right now. Tai, ask anyone, and they will say that without you, there is no us. There is no Digiworld. There is no me." Tai buries his face in his knees. "None of this is your fault- it's mine." I hang my head. Taichi's head shoots up. "It's all my fault Tai, so don't blame yourself." Tears trickle down my cold cheeks. I stare at my hands, hoping Tai will feel better. Please stop this game of self-hate Tai…I…no we… really need you Taichi. We all do…

"Kari…" Taichi whispers. I feel his gentle eyes stare at me sadly.

"Please stop blaming yourself Taichi," I continue, tears falling onto my hands, "because none of this is your fault. It's all my fault. I let T.K collapse and fall sick. I got in the way of you helping Matt. So please, if you want to blame anyone, blame me." I close my eyes, the tears coming faster.

"Oh, Kari no…" Tai breathes, wrapping his arms around me. I turn and press my face into his t-shirt. My tears drench his top. Tai gently rubs my back.

"I'm s-sorry for all th-this Tai," I sob, clutching his shirt.

"No Kari," Tai responds, pulling away and lifting my head. I melt under his gently brown eyes. "None of this is your fault. Don't blame yourself." I wipe my tears on my sleeve, before I turn to Tai and glare at him. A look of confusion washes over his face.

"As long as you stop blaming yourself," I bargain.

Taichi grins. "It's a deal!" My heart warms. He winks, and ruffles my hair.

"Hey!" I scrunch up my face as hair flicks into my eyes. Tai's hand reaches my forehead, and he stops.

"Ooh, fever," he mumbles, rather seriously. "C'mon Kamiya, we'd better get you to bed." I open my eyes, and give him the puppy eyes.

"Awww…" I mumble, mocking disappointment. "No fair!" Taichi smiles as he picks me up and starts to carry me inside. But I suddenly remember his arm, and I push myself of Tai.

"Tai, you can't carry me, remember?" I remind, looking at him seriously, worry reappearing in my mind. "You can't use your arm for another three days." Tai rolls his eyes.

"I was carrying you with my good arm!" Tai defends, raising his left arm. I glare at him. Tai falters.

"I can walk by myself," I state, turning around and stepping forward. But my legs tremble visibly, and I hear Tai snort.

"C'mon Kamiya," he says, walking beside me and placing his left arm around my shoulders, "let's get you to bed." I smile, and lean against his collarbone. Tai walks through the door, and I close it behind him. I begin to feel weary as I sit down on the sofa bed. Tai pulls the sheets away as I lie down. I look to Tai as he pulls the sheets up to my neck.

"G'night Tai," I mumble wearily, sleep coming quickly. Tai smiles.

"G'night Kari," he whispers, kissing my warm forehead.

"Don't ever leave me Tai," I mumble, beginning to fall asleep.

"I'll never leave you," Tai responds. My eyes close.

"Promise?"

Tai pokes my forehead. "Promise." I giggle. I hear him get up and leave.

"Sleep well Kamiya," he whispers. I smile.

"Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Awww… mushy chapter! ^^

Dun worry, better chapter to come! The next one is about…ooh… 5 pages? And I still haven't finished it… ^^;;; oh well… it should be up next week on Monday coz I'm on holidays for the next 2 weeks (Woop! No school! ^^ =D), so I really have no excuse for not updating on time for the next three weeks. I'm really soz this chapter took so damn long to be put up, coz like I explained, I ran out of Internet hours! *sobs* Twenty hours a month isn't enough!!! But do not fear! I will not leave you in the dark! ^^ Aren't I kind?

RockeandRoll: *snort*

Me: *smacks over head w/ large cardboard (more painful! *evil grin*) anime fan* shaddup!

RockeandRoll: *big bandaid on her head* ouch! x_x;;;;

Anyway ^^;… BIG MASSIVE THANX TO ALL WHO JOINED MY NOBLE QUEST TO KILL THE EVIL –THINGS- WHO CREATED RETREAT!!! WE RULE!!!

All: -.-;;;

Me: anyway… please review!!!

cyaz! =)