Nothing Changes like Time
Chapter 10
A/N: with many thanks to my happy customers. Without you I wouldn't exist. This chapter is for anyone who has ever loved someone for a long time and never told them. I wont update until next year, so I hope you all had the happiest Christmas imaginable and got lots of fabulous presents. Have a happy New Year, by the way, and make it your resolution to write lots of fanfiction. Phoenix xoxoxo
The end of class bell sounded throughout the halls of Capeside High and the noise was deafening as the students tried to be first out the door and into their Yuletide spirit. Jack had barely finished the end of his sentence when his class of 10th graders slammed their books shut and charged at the closest exit sign. He didn't say anything as he too was itching to get home to his family and warm living room.
He waved goodbye to the staff members in the faculty room and took off down the corridor.
"Mr. McPhee!" Cameron called out from behind and Jack turned to look.
"Cameron, what can I do you for?" he asked and smiled at her as she walked along beside him.
"I was wondering…were you going to give us any holiday homework? I mean, they all rushed out and…" she trailed off, re-adjusting her back pack on her shoulder, looking at him hopefully.
"No, no homework," he said. "If there was going to be any, I would have set it at the start of the lesson, to ensure that I wouldn't have been cut off."
She laughed, "Good strategy."
He nodded in contemplation, "Yeah, and plus, I want to be marking work over the next couple of weeks as much as you lot want to be doing it," he said then looked down at her, "well, as much as everyone excluding you."
He buttoned his jacket up as they reached the entrance and tightened his scarf around his neck, inhaling the scent of Doug imprinted on his clothing from that morning's spare twenty minutes.
"So what have you got planned for this festive season?" he asked, generally interested.
She shrugged, "The usual family stuff. Huge turkey, (more than anyone can eat), ridiculously pointless tree, elaborately ludicrous lighting and people you haven't seen for ten years telling you 'what a lovely young lady you've grown into' before they pinch your cheeks." She shuddered and Jack laughed.
"I'm glad to see Christmas has touched your soul, Scrooge," he said and placed a hand on her shoulder. She laughed and batted away his condescending hand.
"I could have said the same thing to you a couple of days ago," she teased. "But you seem much happier now Mr McPhee, I'mglad for you."
Jack stopped at his car and pressed a button to unlock it. "It's my stop," he said and flung his briefcase in the driver's door.
"So are you doing anything special?" she asked
"Not really, pretty much the same as you...And I think the Sheriff's putting up he lights on our house as we speak…" he smiled to himself then looked back at his student. "Have a merry Christmas Cameron," he said then got into his car and pulled out of the school's parking lot.
"Hey Jack, can you pass me the masking tape?" Doug asked from his place up on the ladder, trying to put up their Christmas lights. Jack closed the door of his car and grabbed it off the veranda railing and tossed it up to Doug. Amy was playing in the snow, making some sort of rudimentary snowman.
"Doug! She'll freeze," Jack said going to pick up his daughter. She was covered in snow and her skin was so cold Jack was sure it felt damp, but Amy was laughing and clapping her hands all the same.
Doug peered down from the ladder, "You see, she likes it."
"You trust a two year olds opinion?" Jack asked, his eyebrows rose sceptically.
"She's as good a judge as any," he said, coming down the steps and jumped off the last one and onto the ground, lent over and kissed Jack quickly on the lips. "Mmm…let's get her changed before I have to go back to finish up some paper work at the station…hopeful be finished by the time Pacey and Joey get here."
The house was warm and smelt great. Doug had left the office early to cook for Pacey in order to prove his new found culinary capability. They went to Amy's room and Doug opened her wardrobe.
"What do you want to put her in?"
"I don't know, you pick something," Jack said and Doug tuned to look at him in disbelief.
"You never let me choose what she wears, and if I do you change it."
Jack looked up from taking off Amy's wet clothes and smiled at Doug. "Well, I'm letting you pick."
Doug pulled out a velvet pick dress with knee length pleats and a bow tied around the waist. Jack laughed.
"You've been wanting to put her in that dress for months."
"I know! But now I get too, of course, if u don't have any objections?" Doug asked as he approached Jack with the little dress he had bought in New York whenthey last visited Joey and Pacey.
Jack threw his hands in surrender. "No problems, now go to the station before you run out of time," he said and took the dress from Doug and hung it over the edge of her crib.
Jack left Amy on the change table and moved over to Doug and rubbed his shoulders before leaning forward and wrapping his arms around him, burying his face in his partner's neck. He sighed deeply and pulled back, gazing in Doug's eyes before turningto his princess; waiting for his attention. Doug watched Jack go back over to their daughter, smiled faintly before turning to leave.
Jack was setting the table when there was a knock on the door. He put the cutlery down and wondered why Joey and Pacey had arrived so early; Doug wasn't going to be home for another hour and a half. He opened the door.
"Tobey," Jack said taken aback.
"You sound surprised to see me," he said and looked down at his feet. "But that's understandable. We haven't seen each other for, almost a week?" he asked, and then smiled.
"Yeah, I thought you left," he said, opening the door wider, motioning Tobey to come inside.
"Without saying goodbye?" Tobey hung his coat up and followed Jack down the hall.
"Well…you could of."
Tobey sat down at one of the places at the table after he helped Jack set out the essentials.
"But that's the reason I'm here now," Tobey said, slightly saddened by his remark..
"Huh?" Jack asked from the kitchen where he was making coffee.
"Gareth and I are going back to Canada tomorrow."
Jack brought the coffees over to the table and sat opposite Tobey. He fidgeted with the rim of his mug, trying to avoid Tobey's gaze. Finally he looked up.
"So you're back together then?"
Tobey nodded slowly, "Yeah…"
Jack took a sip of his coffee and Tobey mimicked the action.
"It's easier, it's…"
"Begrudgingly?"
"No," Tobey said and took of his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "I love him Jack, I never stopped. I needed time to think it over and I have and…" he paused, "I know he's the man I want to be with for the rest of my life."
"I know the feeling."
Tobey smiled. "This is so pathetic."
Jack looked up and smirked, "What do you mean?"
"The two troubled relationships end up living happily ever after," he laughed, "These are the kind of stories you'll be reading Amy for years to come. How love over came all it's adversaries."
Jack raised his eyebrows. "Adversaries?"
Tobey smirked, "Yeah, adversaries."
Jack's heart was thumping. What exactly was Tobey talking about? He couldn't help but agonise over the fact that Gareth had looked so similar to himself. He looked furtively at Tobey, without his glasses he looked the way Jack remembered he used to when he woke up in the morning, alive yet tired. Surprisingly, he hadn't changed much in the years they'd spent as absentee friends: the straight blond hair, the youthful face and the open personality.
Tobey checked his watch, sighed, put on his glasses and stood up. "I had better get going, I've still got the house to tidy up."
Jack stood up and walked Tobey down the hall and helped him into his coat. They just stood facing each other for a long time. Jack smiled then shrugged, delving his hands deep in the pockets of his dark denim jeans. He shuffled his feet nervously and glanced up at Tobey, who was staying calm and collected at the thought of their immediate separation, he was always like that.
"Gareth looks a lot like me, don't you think?" Jack winced when he heard the words escape his lips. He looked up at Tobey and saw the same sort of subtle contortion spread across his face.
"I thought—"
"I wouldn't notice?" Jack finished his sentence.
"Something like that."
An awkward silence descended between the two friends. Tobey leaned over and pressed his lips to Jack's, whose mind went blank and whose body froze. Slowly, he moved his lips against Tobey's before gathering his thoughts and pulled back, letting go of his hold on Tobey's back.
He took two stepsaway so he was leaning against the wall. He lifted his fingers to his lips and looked at Tobey incredulously. Tobey bit his bottom lip, and disappeared into the evening after shutting the door on his way out.
Doug walked into the living room and found Jack lying in front of the fire with a sleeping Amy in his arms. Jack looked up and claimed Doug's gaze and motioned for him to join him. Doug put down the folder he was carrying, padded over to Jack and lay down next to him, wrapping an arm around his lover's waist.
"Everything under control?" he whispered into Jack's mess of black hair.
"Everything."
"That's good," Doug responded and looked over at their small Christmas tree in the corner of the room. "I can't believe its almost Christmas."
Jack turned his head to at the tree and smiled. "I know… it seems the year's just flown by."
Doug leaned over and they simultaneouslyconnected their lips, happy in the sensations created by their action: safety, security, happiness, joy, love. Jack close his eyes, Doug smiled and brushed his lengthening hair out his eyes. He leaned in and kissed his forehead.
"I love you," he whispered, inching Jack closer, feeling the heat of their bodies pressed together.
"Love you too," Jack murmured, resting his head of Doug's shoulder, and was about to doze off until the front door was flung open and the two of them laughed as Pacey and Joey stormed into the living room full of noise and excitement.
"You teach me how to feel
it feelsalright
There's nothing left to fear
Finding myself
The futher I go
Towards you
You teach me how to love
Parts of myself
I've hated for so long
Loving myself through loving you
I no longer live like a man in the dark
Hiding all the pieces of my broken heart
Way up high I'm holding on
Way up high I'm holding on to you"
Darren Hayes "Feel" from "The Tension and the Spark" (2004)