Figuratively

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Lils,

You don't mind us stopping by, right?

With much love,

Sirius & James & Sirius

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"Are you actually going stay here for the midnight countdown?"

"Of course. Why? Were you thinking otherwise? You know we would never let you meet the new year alone."

"Potter—"

"James."

"James, my family is right here."

"Yes, they are. And look how Sirius has got them so occupied with his lovely doggy stories while I, in turn, talk to you about anything I want."

"They think he's crazy."

"Hey, Lils, ever been kissed?"

"Don't call me Lils."

"Have you ever been kissed, Lily?"

"I'm seventeen and not so much a prude as everyone seems to think. Yes."

"How was it? Or… how were they?"

"Kisses generally feel good, Potter."

"James."

"James."

"Well, yes, kisses, I must admit, are nice. However, there are kisses that can make your knees go weak, and your spine to shatter, and your skin to melt, and your heart to stop completely for that one, single moment."

"I'm… I'm actually still… waiting for… that. A—and I suppose you've felt that several times before?"

"Yes… well… no. Not really. I don't wanna lie to you right now when we're on the brink of a new beginning. Awful way to start the new year, don't you think?"

"Don't you have a family to spend the New Year's with? Do they even know you're here with Sirius?"

"Yes, they do. And the thing is… we're currently vacationing in France. So I'm not being a bastard right now, because I didn't abandon my family. We have in fact already celebrated the arrival of 1977 about—let me see—more than 59 minutes ago. This is my second countdown. Exciting."

"Ah, I see."

"Ten!"

"And now Sirius is leading the countdown. He's adopted my family."

"You'll have to forgive him. He craves these sorts of things."

"My sister doesn't look very happy."

"Neither is the fat fiancé."

"I'm quite pleased about that, actually."

"Five! Four!"

"Hey, Lils, ever been kissed at midnight?"

"Two! One!"

At that moment, Lily Evans found herself quite unable to greet her family—or anyone at all—a very happy New Year. She was, figuratively, melting. And dying, because her spine had shattered, and her heart, unfortunately, had stopped. Figuratively.

"Happy New Year, Lily. Sirius and I planned that so well."

"Happy New Year, James. I hope someday you end up in hell."

"Love you, too, Lils."

A/N: This was supposed to be a companion to "Stakeout," but instead I came up with this, which is something totally different. Anyway, hope you like. Sorry it was all dialogue. I found I was too lazy for anything else.

PS: There was supposed to be a strikethrough over "Sirius &" in "Sirius & James & Sirius" up there, but it wouldn't work, sowe're just going to pretend that it was intentional Marauder silliness.

Happy New Year!